Hikaru no Go - to continue and end
by Viviennevivienne
Summary: After the Hokuto Cup, life went on... (! Important: Please note that this story was created from other fanfictions, that's why you might encounter a fic you've read before here. Please read my complete Dislaimer in Chapter 1!)
1. Unexpected Aftertaste

_**Note** : Novel length (about 500 pages/ ~ 100 chapters), starting where the manga ends (after the Hokuto Cup)_

 _ **Pairing** : multiple male x male pairings (but extremely slow developing)_

 _ **Rating** : 16+ for major sex scenes in the 50+ chapters_

 _**! Disclaimer** : I do not own Hikaru no Go or any of the characters. _

_I am an avid HnG lover and was very unhappy with the way the manga ends. After reading sort of all HnG fics I could find on the Net, I was still deeply dissatisfied, so dissatisfied to the point that I wanted to creat a dream end to HnG (including HikaxAki, Sai coming back, etc...) for myself. There were enough materials from fanfics that I read though, so I decided to use these, but alternated scenes I didn't like, shortened here and added there and fused them into one single novel. I tried my best to make the story go fluid like, yes, like a story of its own and not just an awkward pulled-together moisaic._

 _So when you read this, please note, that I am NOT an author and_ I _DO NOT have the ambition to be credited as such. I only posted the story here since that I thought there might be other HnG lovers out the who would enjoy it._

 _I don't even know if posting this kind of work legal on this site - i'm a total newbie here - if it's not, I'll have to delete this story._

 _I am truely grateful to authors of the fics I used - I'll definitely credit them, but I'd rather do that at the end of the story or at the end of the related chapters in order to avoid spoilers. I am aware of property rights of all the authors and have no intention to violate their rights or humiliate them. If any of the authors voice their disagreement against my usage of their stories, I will also immediately delete the story._

 _Any comments to make this story better are very much appreciated (especially a better name!)_ _Hope you enjoy this story as much as I do!_

 _###_

 ** _Chapter 1_**

 **~1986-2002~**

Yongha had an enviable existence by all accounts, as he had always been allowed practically anything that money can buy. He was an only child, and his parents' involvement in his life was mostly limited to an occasional public appearance and a great deal of money spent to make sure they could always brag about his accomplishments at parties. He showed a keen mind for strategy at a young age; immediately, there were baduk lessons, completed with a 7-dan of some renown as a private tutor. Fortunately, he liked the game, so he chose to apply himself; his achievements were many and keep his parents satisfied and out of his hair, and he grows up mostly on his own terms, doing always and only what pleases him.

He knew he was an exceptionally pretty child—his mother was constantly fussing over him for photographs, and his hair was allowed to grow glossy and long. When he was not quite a child any longer, the prettiness turned him nearly irresistible, and he knew this too, and abused the fact ruthlessly. He started with bored, rich, older females who had nothing better to do. Unfortunately, most of them had an irrational urge to feed him; because he didn't particularly fancy being someone's surrogate child (two parents, uninvolved as they are, have always been quite enough in his opinion), he soon moved on to bored, rich, older men, who were less likely to give him pet names and treat him like some sort of poodle.

He was beautifully polite to his parents' friends and made for pleasant company. He merely tolerated school but had an excellent memory, so when required to, he could talk about history and literature and other such subjects for hours and generally present the image of a civilized young man of good family. Most of the time, however, he was marvelously cocky with a devil-may-care sort of attitude that appealed to his preferred companions. He had no shame in the bedroom or anywhere else (no such virtue had ever been instilled in him) and that made him a particular favorite.

He lived just as he pleased and that was perfectly good enough for him—at least until the first Hokuto Cup, which changed a great deal in his life, because at the Hokuto Cup he encountered Shindou Hikaru.

 **~2002~**

He enjoyed taunting Shindou at first because it was so amusingly simple. He liked stirring things up and being the center of attention and Shindou was the perfect target—easy to rile up, easier still to keep in a state of simmering anger and near-panic. So Shindou was an amusement—at least until he met this upstart on the goban and discovered that there was a great deal more to him than meets the eye. The furious, somewhat inhuman eyes that met his were fascinating and certainly DIFFERENT. He felt the warmth spread through him as he considered the possibilities—and beat Shindou into the ground despite his mad efforts to catch up.

He saw quite a bit of Shindou—and Touya, and the third one, whose name he didn't bother learning at the time—over the course of the next few days, and the fascination took root. He watched as Shindou had an epic game with Suyong, though it's lacking the flash and fire Yongha had seen him exhibit in the official match. Playing the way he had then, he should take Suyong's head off by midgame; instead, he won, but the game took about half an hour longer than Yongha expected it to. Once the game was over and Suyong's head was properly bowed, Shindou sat back on his heels with a bright grin. " _How's THAT for you?_ " he asked, and looked at Yongha with a challenging look which was easy to understand despite the language barrier.

A few moments of silence later, one of the observers piped in helpfully, "He wants to know what you thought of the game."

Yongha looked at the skillful layout of stones on the board, smiled, and said, "You can tell him that 15-6 in midgame was the most foolish move I have ever seen. If he had been playing me, I would have destroyed him there." Silence. Touya looked startled, then thoughtful. "Go on," Yongha said to the upstart who had decided to take it upon himself to translate. "He wanted to know what I thought, didn't he?"

The boy squirmed under his gaze, and then said something in halting Japanese. Immediately, Shindou was on his feet, red with fury, glaring, clearly spoiling for a fight. Touya grabbed his arm, obviously intending to stop him, but that didn't halt the killing looks. Yongha never stoped smiling, thinking that this was more like it, the furious dragon eyes he had seen during the match, attention aimed solely at him. He decided he liked Shindou better like this, with single-minded focus, and resolved to keep him this way as long as possible.

He inclined his head, like a king to one of his lowliest subjects, and said, "If you'll excuse me, I skipped lunch." Shindou shouted after him, but he ignored it.

He managed an informal match with Touya the next day before they left, and won it by some miracle he wasn't certain of. It was Shindou's face he remembered from that match, though—tense and worried, as though much more was riding on the outcome of the game than a head bowed in surrender. He seemed to take Touya's loss as a personal affront. After he won, Yongha tested Shindou's control by smirking at him, and sure enough, just that easily his color was up and he let loose a long, incomprehensible string of Japanese.

"Well," Yongha said to Touya, who looked humiliated by Shindou's outburst. "That was fun."

"Excuse him, please," Touya said in his textbook Korean, and stood up to grab Shindou by the wrist and drag him from the room.

" _Oi._ " Yongha turned to see the third Japanese boy—Ya-something or other; he didn't really care one way or another—scowling at him. „What _about me?_ "

Yongha looked at questioningly at Suyong, who sighed dramatically and translated, "I think he wants to play with you."

Yongha examined the slightly slouched, scowling form of the Japanese player, then shrugged and told Suyong, "You can tell him he's not worth my time." He turned and sauntered out in the direction taken by Touya and Shindou.

"Yongha! Hey YONGHA, YOU RUDE, IMPOLITE-"

He cut off Suyong's furious tirade with a shut door and a laugh.

He had never really liked school, but when he get back from Japan, he hired a tutor and bought Japanese phrasebooks. "What are you DOING?" asked a bewildered Suyong when he catched him at it one afternoon between matches.

" _Studying so you no have to deliver my messages,_ " Yongha told him in carefully slow Japanese, never looking up from his book.

Suyong shook his head and stood there gaping like a fish for a few moments before turning on his heel and leaving.

###

 _ **Note:** this is from THE BRIEF AND ABRIDGED HISTORY OF KO YONGHA by chaineddove. No, this long story is not about Ko Yongha. I just like him a lot and try to incorperate a tiny bit of him into the plot. _


	2. Hikaru's Pain

**Chapter 2**

"White's cut here was a good move. It took advantage of Black's two spaced jump."

Yashiro and Akira nodded at Kurata's remark. It had been an electrifying game, one that Hikaru had almost pulled out. Going into the game, not many outside of the room's four occupants had believed that Hikaru would have given any type of game close to this. Yashiro chimed in, "Here though, blacks move was brilliant. Ko Yeong Ha didn't see it until it was too late."

Again more nods. Akira now replied, "Yes, white should have swapped the order of these two moves, then he could avoid the issue."

After the closing ceremonies, the four members of Team Japan had agreed to meet back at Akira's house to finish discussing today's games. While they had intended to discuss all three games, the First Board game between Hikaru and Ko Yeong Ha had been all they'd discussed thus far, and it was already getting late.

"This move, it separated White brilliantly. He can't just counter without putting his own stones in atari here."

"Yes, but White responded well here. The moves here forced a pitched central battle that cost Shindo territory."

The only one not talking, not even paying all that much attention, was the one who had played the game earlier that day in the Hokuto Cup. Lost in his own thoughts, Hikaru Shindo was reviewing not the game, but his own mental strength. He hadn't been strong enough earlier today, despite all his boasting. He had been selfish, forcing his way into the First Chair, just to take on Ko Yeong Ha, to vindicate Japan for what he had said about Shusaku. No, it wasn't for Japan; it had been for Sai. No one else knew, no one else understood the Sai that was in his Go; that drove him to seek the Divine Move. Yet today, he hadn't been strong enough.

Glancing next to him, Hikaru studied the intense face of his eternal rival. Akira was studying the board with powers of concentration that Hikaru knew matched his own. Would he have lost today? Could Akira have done any better than Hikaru had? The two had played so many games lately, and Hikaru knew Akira's strength. Still, they had played only once so far in an official game, and in such battles were where true strength, of both mind and spirit, were decided.

Akira meanwhile continued to study the Go board with eyes too transfixed to blink. This game… it was on a level beyond what he knew Hikaru to possess previously. He had gotten stronger. This was to be expected, in fact Akira would have felt betrayed if Hikaru didn't improve and grow in his Go abilities. What this game was showing however was that Hikaru had once again, moved closer to Akira.

Glancing over at his rival, Akira noticed the look in Hikaru's eyes. The pain and disappointment in them, he had experienced this before himself. Akira knew all too well that when Hikaru recovered mentally from this, that he would be even more formidable. His second game against Hikaru three years before, the one where he had been dominated completely had caused a similar reaction for Akira. He could of course exploit this, attack Hikaru's wavering mental fortitude and delay his return to form a little longer, but he wouldn't. Not only because any victory would be empty, like a default win, and no true Go player ever wanted a default win, but also because Hikaru was his friend. No, not just his friend... Their relationship over the years was complex for certain, and he doubted if he could describe it to anyone else, but it was what it was nevertheless.

Over the last two and a half years, Hikaru had been chasing Akira, and Akira knew that it would not last, despite his own steps forward. Soon they would be side by side, chasing one another, too close for one to be definitively seen as stronger. Where they would go from there he didn't know, but he couldn't wait to find out. The idea of the Go they would create filled him with joyous anticipation.

###

"This certainly was an impressive game Hikaru. This move in the center, I wouldn't have even thought of that."

Once again Hikaru found himself staring down at a recreation of his game against Ko Yeong Ha. It had been two days since the tournament had ended, but it was obvious that everyone Morishita 9-Dan had wanted to discuss the game with him. The game records had been published after all, and would soon be appearing in Weekly Go as well, making it only the second time his games had been recorded, the first of course being the Shinshodan match against Toya Meijin, the game Sai had played. So he had complied, and was now explaining his thinking on different moves with a less than enthusiastic tone.

Promptly, Morishita sat back and said, "All right, enough of this, let's play a few games." Looking towards Hikaru, he continued, "Shindo, will you play with me?"

Looking over to Morishita, Hikaru gave a weak smile and nodded. "Yes Sensei, of course."

As they began to play, Morishita watched Shindo carefully, noting the boy's trademark extreme concentration. There seemed nothing wrong with his moves from a technical standpoint, but what was lacking was obvious; the passion he usually put into each move.

"Is this the first game you've played since that game on Sunday?"

"No, I played Hon Suyon yesterday at his uncle's Go salon."

Morishita cocked an eyebrow. "Really? What made you do that?"

Shindo nonchalantly replied, "I promised him I would before the Hokuto Cup matches. He wanted to beat me and tell me his name was Hon Suyon."

Placing a stone down, Morishita asked, "How did it go?"

Responding with a stone, Hikaru answered, "I won again. He seemed rather disappointed."

Klack. Another stone hit the board. "Disappointed in his loss, or disappointed in the way you played?"

Hikaru looked up from the board at Morishita with a somewhat surprised look across his face. "Sensei?"

"I have watched your game improve and evolve over these last two years, but what has remained the same was the passion you played with. That passion is what has made you what you currently are. I do not see that passion in the Go before me. I do not know why that loss to Ko Yeong Ha has been so difficult for you, but that loss will only make you stronger unless you don't allow it to. It's your turn."

Hikaru just sat there a moment, then quickly played a stone on the board. _Why am I like this? It's because I couldn't defend Sai, prove to Ko Yeong Ha that Shusaku… that Sai, still could teach things… right?_ Playing another move, then another, Hikaru shook his head, then slammed his next stone down with his anger. _No, it wasn't just about Sai. If it had been Sai, he would have moved on from that loss the second the first stone of the next game began. He had always said that even losing had purpose. I'm mad at myself, not for failing Sai, but for failing myself. That game, it was the first time I'd lost a game I couldn't lose no matter what costs._ Tightening his grip on his fan, Hikaru's hand darted up to the upper corner of the board to cut off Morishita's attack.

It was difficult, realizing that even when heart and soul were completely placed into a game, when nothing mattered but victory no matter how it was achieved, holding complete confidence in that strength, that defeat could still come. As he placed another stone, a smile crossed Hikaru's lips. _This must have been what Akira felt after Sai defeated him that second time. The doubt that my skills are enough, that I'll ever attain that height. If Akira saw me now, would he laugh?_

As Hikaru played his next move and the move after that, a presence began to appear on the board, and an all too familiar fire began to burn in his eyes, in his heart. _Well, let's just see him laugh at this! The same for Ko Yeong Ha too. Next year, the next team tournament, I'll qualify for it, and show Ko Yeong Ha and Akira my kind of Go, and next time I won't just be first chair, but I'll beat Ko Yeong Ha too!_

As his next move went down, Morishita grinned inwardly. It appeared that the boy was getting over the loss, and would be back to playing his style of Go again shortly. As Hikaru placed his next move however, Morishita gasped slightly, and paused. Staring down at the stone, he blinked, then snapping out of it played the attachment. He then waited for Hikaru's next move, which came right after. No, he must have imagined it. For a moment, he could have sworn though that when Hikaru had played that stone, his fingers had been glowing.


	3. A match against Nase

**Chapter 3**

Placing a stone down on the board, Hikaru sighed with his cheek resting on his hand as he waited for his opponent to move. He was starting to regret having not insisted on using game clocks. True it wasn't an official game, but he did want to finish before he became an adult.

Across from him, Kawai stared at the board with sweat dripping down his face, fingers scratching his chin. A minute later he placed a stone down, attaching to one of Hikaru's white stones. Lifting his head up, Hikaru was pleasantly surprised at the short delay. Quickly placing another stone, he decided to glance around the Go Salon while Kawai continued to study the board in a futile attempt to survive. Four others stood around the board watching the game, some scratching or rubbing their chins, one with arms folded. The owner of the Salon had been watching, but had gone off to check up on another pair of paying customers who were in the middle of a game as well. Then there was the strange old lady who ran the register who otherwise Hikaru couldn't remember having ever seen do anything.

A 'klak' on the board told Hikaru that Kawai had made his move, and turning to see the board again, Hikaru needed merely glance to see what Kawai was attempting. Placing his white stone down to a collective sound of gasps and 'ohhh' from around him, Hikaru returned to scanning the room.

"Hey, don't think just because you're a pro that you don't have to pay attention against me and still win!"

Without even thinking Hikaru replied, "Well I guess only five stones was a bit unfair. Maybe seven or eight would have been better."

"YOU PUNK!" Kawai dove around the board and put Hikaru into a headlock. "Don't think you're all that just because of that article in Weekly Go! After all, you lost by half a point to that Korean guy, Ko Yeong Ha!"

Gritting his teeth Hikaru struggled to get free; finally managing it once Kawai realized that while he was putting Hikaru in a headlock someone else had taken his seat. The lack of focus had been enough to allow Hikaru to escape. "Hey Niimi, I was… that is I…"

"Six stones for me, and if you don't mind could we play shidougo instead?"

The owner, overhearing this, said, "Hey Niimi, if you're going to have him teaching you, don't you think you should be paying him for it? He is a pro after all."

"Ack!"

Everyone around including Hikaru began to laugh at that. As the laughter died down, Hikaru answered, "It's all right, I don't mind. You sure six will be enough though?"

"Heh, yeah, as long as it's a teaching game it should be."

Silently admitting defeat at a rematch anytime soon, Kawai walked over by the owner near the counter as Niimi began to place his handicap stones. Leaning back against the counter so that he could watch the game from afar, Kawai said, "Shindo is amazing huh?"

The owner nodded. "It's hard to believe he was that same insei who challenged us to a team game almost two years ago. Now he's right up there with Akira Toya 3 - Dan as one of the premier young pro players."

Kawai chuckled. "Yeah, but he's good for business if he keeps coming here. Famous player like that always attracts a crowd."

Then he heard Hikaru saying "No. Playing these types of games relaxes me. Besides, there's something else right now that I need to focus on. I have to face Akira in the Young Lions Tournament."

The mention of Akira's name caused a calamity of comments and questions. It was a big deal for many of the patrons, all huge fans of Hikaru, to hear about him facing off against the other lower Dan heavyweight. Meanwhile the owner was once again scanning Weekly Go, then said, "Ah, here it is. You'd have to play Toya though in the finals. It says here that your next match is against someone named Asumi Nase. Hmmm, no ranking, is she an insei then?"

Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, I know her from when I was an insei."

Kawai then said, "Well if she's just an insei then she won't be much of a challenge for our Shindo."

Doumoto replied, "But doesn't she have to be decent to get to the third round?"

"So what?" Kawai rebutted. "Shindo went blow for blow with Ko Yongha and almost won!" Turning to Hikaru he said, "Come on tell them Shindo. Easy win right?"

Hikaru's eyes became distant, as his thoughts flashed back to the glimpses of Nase's recent games. More importantly though, he was listening to his instinct on the matter. Finally he replied, "I won't know until we play."

###

Standing by one of the few remaining game tables, two young pros conversed. "Yeah, this tournament is a relief for me, I don't get to play that many games right now. Outside this tournament, I've only played four official games so far."

Hikaru nodded. "Tell me about it Isumi. I remember when I first started; it seemed like I had to wait forever for each of my games. The Honinbo 1st prelims should be starting up next month though, so that should get you some tournament play."

"I know." Isumi answered. "So far they've just given me Dan matches. I'm two and two in them though."

Hikaru then added, "You and I don't have any Dan games against each other this year. Guess we'll have to play in a tournament match."

Isumi smiled. "I look forward to it. I've improved since our last game."

"Cool. You better not lose in the tournaments until we play then."

Hikaru nodded, his own expression remaining calm and cheerful. "Yeah, I'm playing Nase in my first match today. I'm looking forward to it. I think it'll be very interesting."

Isumi nodded, then frowned. "I play Toya in my first game."

Hikaru's mind came into focus and his expression turned serious at the mentioning of his rival. "Touya? You're playing Touya?"

Isumi nodded. "I'll really have to focus. To be honest I'd rather switch with you. Playing Nase ought to be a piece of cake by comparison."

As Hikaru was about to reply they heard a strange noise and turned to see Nase standing there frozen in shock. Isumi jumped to rephrase. "Nase I… I didn't mean that you're… it's just that, compared to Toya… I didn't mean that…"

Words failed him though, and Nase's head lowered. It was quite obvious that she was taking the comment as a statement on her lack of strength, and her confidence was waning as a result.

###

The announcement came, and Nase reached for her bowl to nigiri. As she placed two stones on the board, she looked up again at Hikaru, and was amazed at how much his facial expression had changed. Gone was the smiling, friendly face she'd remembered, replaced by a taut, determined gaze. He really was taking this seriously.

Klak. Klak. Klak.

Klak. Klak.

The lower corner became a pitched battleground, with Nase pushing and Hikaru easily countering. Still, she was hardly making this game easy on him.

Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak.

Nase froze. He'd played a hane. She had been sure he'd attach there. What was he thinking? Was it a mistake, or was it a plan? He had to have noticed the trap by now. Then she saw it, and her face paled. He'd done it on purpose. He'd trapped her in a trap of her own creation. The position now favored Hikaru, and she couldn't stop it now.

Klak.

She could try to endure, but it seemed pointless now.

Klak.

Hikaru had out-read her, and this game was over.

Shhft.

Hikaru had opened his fan up and was now watching the board with it covering his lower face. Feeling the tears well up again, Nase lowered her head and said, "I… I resign."

Closing up the fan, Hikaru smiled and said, "Thank you. That was really fun."

Nase thanked him back, and wiped away a tear. Fun, it was fun for him. She'd tried so hard, and he'd just been having fun.

"You sure gave me a workout though. Man, my palms were sweating there for awhile."

Looking up, Nase just stared at him. She had him sweating? Smiling as the compliment of before dawned on her, Nase once again wiped away the tears. He'd found the game fun because it was _challenging_ , not because she'd been easy for him to beat.

Sniffing again, Nase then said, "Shindou… thank you."


	4. Who will be the Young Lion?

**Chapter 4**

"The Young Lions Tournament is certainly shaping up nicely this year."

"Yeah," Doi replied, "Looks like Akira Touya will win for the third straight year."

"I don't think so," Kosemura replied. "Shindo Beginner – Dan has been playing superbly, despite losing to Ko Yongha."

The Weekly Go pressroom was, as usual, alive with opinions and commentary. "You mean that kid who replaced Touya as the 1st Captain in the Hokuto Cup? Sure he played strong against Ko Yongha, but that just shows that had Kurata let Toya play then he would have won."

Sitting back in his chair and listening to the conversation, Amano smiled. It was good to be back here, covering the world of Go. Finally he added in, "While it does boil down to what each has accomplished, you're forgetting what really makes this interesting. Toya and Shindo see one another as rivals, a statement made only stronger by the fact that Koyo Toya, Kuwabara Honinbo, Ogata Judan, and Kurata 7 – Dan all have high opinions of Shindo. Who wins this Saturday is not as important as the knowledge that those two are the future of Go in Japan."

There's a silence after Amano finishes, then one of them says, "Well it'd be great if Shindo showed the same level of skill as Toya. His game against Ko Yongha was impressive and all, but I don't know. He did have that stint of forfeits last year."

Kosemura responded, "But Shindo is very determined now. He will give Toya a challenge, and I think he'll even win."

"Wow, so if Shindo and Toya keep going like this, then next year they could take the Hokuto Cup from Korea! Japan can be on the comeback internationally, and the young blood will continue what Ogata and Kurata have started!"

Amano chuckled. _Yes, dreams are certainly nice to have, especially since you never know if they'll come true or not. That's what makes grasping for them so much fun, inspiration to get yourself up the next day._ Checking his watch, Amano saw that the games should just be starting.

"Oh yeah, aren't both Toya and Shindo playing today?"

Someone reached for a copy of the game schedule. "Yeah, oh, Shindo has an Oteai game today. Come to think of it, if he wins today, doesn't that mean…"

Several people moved to check the Oteai point list. Amano meanwhile had already known. "Yes, if he wins today, Shindo will be promoted to 2 –Dan." With that Amano stood up and headed out. He had quite an interesting article to prepare for.

###

One thing was evidently clear to Hikaru: Nakayama was not making things easy for him at all. The two had never played a game before, the match they should have played before being one of Hikaru's many forfeits from last year.

He knew its significance of course, but honestly his rank meant less to him than his game against Akira did. True that the higher his rank, the stronger his opponents would become, especially once he broke 5 – Dan. That was a long ways away though, and Akira was right around the corner.

Taking a pause to read the board, Hikaru saw that he was behind. The game was of course still young, and there were many things he could do. The more pressing question though was why he was behind. Sure Nakayama was good, but Hikaru felt that he was stronger. His eyes flickered over to where Akira was playing his Third Round match of the Tengen preliminary. If he won then he'd advance to the final round of the 1st preliminary.

Akira, that was the problem. Here he was, playing a game, and he had his rival on his mind. It wasn't just unfair to himself to play Go like this; it was an insult to Nakayama for not giving him his full attention. If Sai were here now, what would he say to such a lack of mental discipline? Sai…

On the other side of the room Akira was having only a slightly less difficult time with his own opponent. He wasn't losing yet, but the game was certainly much closer than he knew it should have been. There was tenseness in his body today, an excitement that he was struggling to contain. Hikaru, soon he would face Hikaru. He knew he had to focus on the game at hand of course, but his rival continued to swim through his mind. While it was true that Akira took all his games seriously, this Saturday's game was special. A game with Hikaru always was…

The lunch bell sounded, and there was a low rumble as people began to rise and head for the lounge to relax and have a bite to eat. Both Hikaru and Akira waited for a moment though, examining the boards before them. Then taking a deep breath, one rose, followed by the other, and they exited the room as well.

Sitting at the table with several other players, Nakayama wiped the sweat from his forehead. "Tough game Nakayama?"

Nakayama turned to look at the man who'd spoken and said, "I suppose so. At first I was worried, but Shindo wasn't playing as I'd heard he could play, so I felt encouraged."

"That sounds good. So why the sweat?"

Nakayama sighed. "His last few moves before the break seemed to be much stronger. I think he's starting to come around, and it was making me sweat a little."

The man chuckled. "Keep thinking like that and you'll lose for sure."

Nakayama nodded. "What about you Kobayashi? Aren't you playing Akira Touya in your Tengen match?"

Kobayashi nodded. "Yeah, and mine is about the same as yours. He started out slow, but he's starting to really pick it up. You can really feel the intensity beginning to rise."

"Guess that just means we'll have to pick up our games as well." Glancing around, Nakayama tried to spot the pair. "Hmmm, I wonder where those two are anyway. Usually Shindo eats in here with everyone."

"Maybe he went out to eat with Toya? I heard that they're pretty good friends, that Shindo goes to Toya's family Go Salon a lot."

Nakayama nodded. "Yeah, Waya mentioned that to me before. If he was here today I'd ask him myself, but he's not playing today. From what I've heard Waya and Isumi say though, those two are rivals."

Kobayashi blanched. "Seriously? Is Shindo really that good?"

"I know," Nakayama replied, "it's hard to believe that there could be someone else out there with Toya's skills, but I'll know before today's over."

Just then Hikaru walked into the room and sat down by himself, eyes closed in deep thought and reflection. Watching him the whole time, Kobayashi then said, "I guess he wasn't with Toya. Strange though, you'd think that if they were friends and rivals, that they'd eat lunch together."

It was at those words that Nakayama remembered. The reason he had yet to really see Hikaru play in Waya's Saturday study group. "They're playing each other in the finals of the Young Lions Tournament on Saturday. Maybe they're staying away from one another as a way to prepare?"

Kobayashi paled. "If that's true, then they must be rivals. If Toya needs that kind of mental preparation for Shindo then…"

Nakayama began to sweat.

###

Three and a half points. Hikaru sighed. He'd been able to turn it around and win by three and a half points. So he was now a 2 – Dan. Rising from his seat, Hikaru turned just in time to see Kobayashi resign to Akira. So they had both won. Akira still had a game tomorrow in the 1st round of the Judan tournament's 2nd preliminary, but Hikaru now had the rest of the week to focus on his match with his rival on Saturday.

Heading out into the lobby and beginning to put his shoes on, he was joined moments later by Akira, who began to do the same. As Hikaru got his second shoe on, the pairs' eyes met, and they gave each other a sharp glare. Right now they weren't friends, they were rivals, preparing for an imminent clash on the battlefield.

As they broke their gaze from one another, Amano appeared out of the elevator. "Ahh, Shindo, so you won your game today? Congratulations on making 2 – Dan."

Shindo smiled and thanked him. Amano then turned to Akira and said, "Toya, well done on winning your match as well. I was wondering if I might be able to get an interview." Hikaru sighed with a smile. Akira was still the one who garnered all the attention. His rise in Dan was just a side note. Well, one day that would change. Moving to leave, Hikaru then heard from behind him, "Shindo, I was actually hoping to interview the two of you together."

Hikaru froze. Did he hear that correctly? Turning around, he saw the same surprised look on Akira's face that he was certain was on his own. "You want to interview me?"

Smiling broadly, Amano answered, "Yes, I would like to interview both of you. I'm thinking of an angle something along the lines of this. **'21st Century Rivals**.' What do the two of you think?"


	5. Young Lions Finale

Sitting before the goban in his room Hikaru placed a stone on the board. This had been Akira's answer to Lu Lee's advance during the Hokuto Cup. Checking over the game record, Hikaru examined Lu Lee's response, then checked to see if he agreed. Akira's move had been brilliantly timed, and the biggest problem was that Lu Lee had not seen it coming beforehand. While Hikaru had noticed it coming while reviewing the game record afterwards, whether he would have seen it in the heat of the game was another matter.

Reaching over to pick up another set of game records, this one from the Honinbo League, Hikaru scanned until he found what he'd been looking for, a similar strategy that Akira had used in this game. Comparing the two, Hikaru returned to the game on the board, and his eyes widened. What if he moved there instead? Then there, and there after. Yes, that would put him in the advantage.

Leaning back for a moment and wiping the sweat from his brow, Hikaru let out a long yawn. He'd need to get some sleep shortly; the game was tomorrow and he'd need his rest. However he also could use all the preparation for Akira that he could get. While familiar with his rival's Go style from the many games they'd played at the Go salon, like Hikaru, Akira's true strength came out in official games.

Of course normally he'd have been going to Akira's Go Salon to practice, review, and discuss games before a big match, but the fact that it was Akira he was playing meant it couldn't be possible. It was understood by both that it was best to keep their distance for now. While their current closeness allowed them to confide comments to one another, at the moment they were not friends but rivals and adversaries, and so he had opted to go to the other Go salon, the one where his so-called fan club resided. It wasn't that he didn't like going there, in fact it was a rather refreshing change from Akira's salon where anyone who so much as suggested that each of Akira's moves were not the Divine Move itself was someone to be despised. Still, the more favorable environment did not make up for the commentary, play level, and development of Go that he could have with Akira.

Then there was the matter of the interview that Amano had asked about, and all that it implied. Sure, he really didn't care if anyone else thought that he and Akira were rivals. As long as Akira acknowledged him as such then… _screw all the rest_!

Still, because they had agreed to do the interview only after tomorrow's match was complete, the outcome of the match loomed heavy on the validity of the article. If Hikaru won, then the article would certainly open everyone's eyes as to the power of his Go, and move him into the same spotlight that Akira had been given almost since he began as a pro. What the effects of a victory would be on the Go world Hikaru didn't know, but he didn't care about what consequences might come. His goal was on beating Akira, no matter what anyone else thought of it.

All right, fifteen more minutes, then he'd go to bed.

###

Although there was still plenty of time before the actual match, a fairly large crowd had already gathered. Most were Go players themselves, either pro or insei, joined by several members of the press. Off near the main entrance to the room talking to Amano was half the reason for the large crowd.

"So Touya-Sensei," Amano said, "you've been on a rather nice streak lately, I think you're up to twelve in a row now, fourteen if you count the Hokuto Cup. How do you feel about your chances of winning the Young Lions Tournament for the third straight year?"

A weak smile crossed Akira's face. He was trying to be nice to Amano, to answer his questions, but this really wasn't the time. The sheer determination in his eyes showed that quite well, making the smile look out of place. "I guess I'll just have to play the game and see."

"You and Shindo have only played once before since turning pro, a game you won last year. Does that give you an advantage?"

"No."

Amano scribbled down something on his notepad. Normally he'd wait for asking questions until after the game, but there was just something in the air today that made him want to get the pre-game thoughts. Just a few more questions. "I have heard that Shindo-Sensei and you have played quite often at your family's Go salon. Now…" Turning to look at his watch, a thought occurred to him. "Come to think of it, where is Shindo? It's almost time for-"

Just then Hikaru walked right passed Akira and Amano, face taut and eyes alive with an intense determination, even greater than the look in Akira's eyes. For a moment Hikaru's head turned slightly and electricity flashed between him and Akira. Then he was passed them and the moment was gone.

Turning to follow Hikaru for a moment with his eyes, Amano lingered on him for a moment, then turned back to look at Akira who was also watching Hikaru's back with an immense intensity. Right before his eyes that intensity turned to a calm focus and Akira excused himself, stepping around Amano and walking off towards the one remaining game table, towards Hikaru. Watching the young man walk off, Amano suddenly realized that sweat was dripping down his own face. That intensity, smothering in its power, if only for a moment. He'd only ever felt something like that while standing next to two top players in a title match. But from ones so young, even if one of them was Akira Toya… this was going to be amazing.

Across the room, Waya, Ochi, Isumi, Honda, and Nase were standing around chatting about the match. They had decided to come support Hikaru, although how much Ochi had wanted to support Hikaru was suspect as far as Waya was concerned. More likely he was looking forward to watching Hikaru play Akira. Well, Waya had to admit, so was he. Glancing around the room, he saw all the pros, many whom wouldn't normally come to such a match like the Young Lions Tournament, even to see Akira Toya. This was likely a result of the waves that Hikaru had been causing as of late, and it wasn't from that article a few weeks ago, but from word of mouth amongst the Go pro community.

Then something caught Waya's eye. Doing a double take to make sure he saw what he thought, he just stared for a moment before touching Isumi on the shoulder and saying, "Isumi, everyone look. It's Kurata 7 – Dan. He's here to watch Shindo and Toya's match."

"Well" Isumi replied, " he was the manager of Team Japan for the Hokuto Cup. Now the 1st and 2nd chairs of that team are about play, is it so surprising he's interested?"

Honda then replied, "I heard that he was interested in Shindo before that though."

Ochi, taking a moment to push his glasses back up onto his face nodded. "Yes, I look forward to watching this game." He then turned and walked off towards the game table. _Yes, now lets see what you can do Toya. You've always only seen Shindo, praising Shindo and ignoring me. Now here he is in front of you. Show me how you will respond._

Meanwhile Hikaru, having reached the table, moved around to one side and pulled out a chair in silence. He had been waiting for this, worked hard to get here, and now he was here, before Akira. Right on queue Akira arrived at the table and began to pull out his own chair, although neither player sat down just then. "Well done on defeating Ashiwara to make it to the next Kisei preliminary. I hear you won your first round match for it against Matsunaga 6 – Dan."

Voice calm and nonchalant, Hikaru replied, "Yes, but then you're playing in the Honinbo 3rd preliminary right now. My efforts hardly compare."

"Well I was in the League last time, so I start out playing in the 3rd preliminary. My getting there isn't so much of a feat as it might sound. Like you, I take one step at a time."

Until now the pair had been staring down at the board, avoiding eye contact. As they took their seats however, their eyes met once again. People standing near them chatting suddenly stopped their conversations and looked over at the pair, and the rest of the room, noticing the drop in conversation, likewise looked to the table and seeing the pair sitting there, began to make their way to the table. Those who had been closest though actually took a step or two back, giving the pair space.

It was as if a bubble of pure suffocating energy had formed around the table, and was slowly expanding. Some of the insei who had come found themselves struggling to breathe, as did one or two pros. Kurata however stood his ground, even taking a step closer to get a better view of what was going on. A moment later he began to head towards the table, arriving at the same time as Ochi, who was followed moments later by Waya and the rest, although they were keeping their distance. Looking at the two players, Kurata for a moment caught a glint from their eyes and gasped. It wasn't the suffocating, invisible miasma that did it, but what he saw playing out at the table.

The look in their eyes, the power, the intensity they projected; in his mind's eye it swirled and formed, no longer two Go players sitting there, but rather a lion and a dragon before the table. Each one slowly prowling around the table, bearing their fangs, jaws snapping, growling and sneering at one another, each ready to pounce, to devour the other with their indomitable wills. Though the faces on each player remained cold and calm, as if chiseled from stone, there was no question these two were predators ready to strike. To see something like this between two players so young, only a 2 – Dan and a 3 – Dan, it would have been awe-inspiring if it wasn't so scary. It felt like the air itself was electrified.

Then their eyes lowered as they reached for their Go bowls and the intensity dropped, or at least it seemed to. Wiping the sweat from his face as the crowd continued to gather and the time before the game drew near, Kurata just stood watching with a slight shaking in his one leg. He had known the two saw one another as rivals, but this went beyond. While the intensity seemed to have left, he knew that in reality it was merely simmering, as if each had turned their intensity down from a rolling boil to a simmer. If only each had been like this during the Hokuto Cup. An image of Ko Yongha wearing a Toya mask being blown back out of his chair by Hikaru entered Kurata's mind, and he grinned slyly despite himself.

As the officials moved about, making sure everyone was far enough back and that everything was in order as game time approached, a figure appeared at the entrance to the room. At first no one noticed, but as he made his way in towards the table, several people turned to look and their jaws dropped. Seeing the transfixed look of those people, Amano's eyes moved to follow the others and came to a stop as he spotted Ogata Judan Gosei. Behind him stood a slightly nervous Ashiwara, but as far as those looking on were concerned, Ashiwara was invisible.

As the crowd parted to allow the titleholder in for a prime view of the game, Amano watched in shock. Ogata had just lost the second match of the Honinbo Finals. With the series tied at one apiece, why Ogata was coming here was a mystery. He had been locked away in his home for weeks now preparing for the matches, barely leaving for anything.

Then he remembered his research. Ogata had been the one to recommend Hikaru as an insei. He had also been here the last time Hikaru had entered this tournament as an insei, and during the Shinshodan match between Hikaru and Toya Meijin. He had known before of course that Ogata had been keeping an eye on Hikaru, admired his game even, but to come and watch this match during the Honinbo Finals, could it be that it went beyond that? Could Ogata actually…

###

The buzzer sounded, and the official announced that the final match would soon begin. Each player removed the tops of their go bowls, and reached for stones to nigiri in silence. "Onegaishimasu."

Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak.

Those around them watched on in shock. This wasn't a championship match - this was speed Go. Already the pair had bypassed fuseki and entered into a fierce battle in the lower right corner.

Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak.

 _So he wants that stone huh?_

Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak.

Hikaru glanced up for a moment, his intensity and focus rising as he did so, then moved in.

Klak.

Akira froze. Attacking from there, he hadn't seen it. Hikaru would win the exchange unless he acted now. That move though, once again he was reminded of Sai. He'd never understood that relationship, but now was not the time. Reading ahead in an instant, Akira made his move.

Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak. Klak

The game continued, Hikaru slightly ahead after the last exchange.

Ogata meanwhile had also noticed it, and his eyes were just as focused on each of Hikaru's moves now. _I could have sworn I saw it. Just then, for a moment, I thought that Shindo's fingertips…they were glowing. But now, I don't see it. Still…_ He'd played many games against his teacher over the years, and he knew the effect that seemed to come off Koyo Toya whenever he played a stone. That's why he was sure he'd seen it just now, but then it had vanished like a star on the curtain of night, pulled away at the coming of the dawn.

The endgame had begun, and such a flawless endgame it was shaping up to be. Looking on wide-eyed, Waya couldn't believe what he was watching. If it hadn't been moving so fast, it was almost like watching a title match. Glancing off slightly to the only other table, the one that Kadowaki sat at, Waya felt a tinge of pity for the rookie pro. Unlike the other games of the tournament, the final match of the tournament was recorded, and the Go Association tapped the lower Dans to record such games. In this case it had been Kadowaki, and while originally he'd been pleased as it meant he'd get to see the game, it had turned out as a nightmare. The look of utter agony and exhaustion on Kadowaki's face told it all. Waya just hoped that he'd been able to keep up with the move order early on.

Returning to the game, Waya watched as Akira placed a stone, and it was over. Now all that was left was to count out the points. The whole room watched in silence as the pair began to count the territory, the positions complex and hard to understand.

 _Who won?_ The waiting was nerve racking, and while Waya understood all too well how hard it was to calculate such a close game surely someone here knew. Glancing to Ogata, Waya tried to read his face, to find some sign that he could see who had won. None appeared, Ogata's eyes were as intensely focused on the board, sweat dripping from his face, as everyone else's was.

His eyes returned to the board. They were almost done counting, soon they'd know, this intense, awesome game would be over with a winner declared. But who? Both players' faces were dripping with sweat, taut expressions across their faces as the counting finished. That was it, the count was over. Eyes widening, Waya waited in the silence for some sign from either player of the outcome, a cheer from the victor, a lowered head from the loser. It was maddening. _Who had won?_


	6. Shindou the Go instructor

_! Important: Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 6**

Even though it was only the beginning of the game, Hikaru felt rather bored. This was the second time he'd ever played Kawasaki 3 – Dan. Hikaru had noticed that his opponent had been perspiring and at times visibly shaking from the moment they both kneeled down before the goban, and Kawasaki hadn't started out well at all. Hikaru remembered this; it had been the same when he'd played Kadowaki for the second time during Isumi's Shinshodan match. Kadowaki had been remembering Sai's strength in that game and the result had been quite clear to Hikaru. His opponent was afraid of him. It was obvious an easy win.

The lunch bell sounded, and Hikaru quickly rose from his seat. It was about time, he needed to get away. Without even glancing at the board or his opponent who remained seated, Hikaru turned and made his way towards the lunchroom.

Hikaru sighed deeply as thoughts of that day ran through his mind. Even Amano had seemed disappointed during the interview afterwards. Certainly he was cheerful and full of praise for both him and Akira, inquiring about how they'd met, thoughts on the future, reflections on the game they'd just played and so on. Still, Hikaru could tell that Amano had secretly been cheering for him, although whether it was out of a desire for a more convincing article with his victory over Akira or something more genuine, Hikaru didn't know, nor really, did he care all that much. What had mattered was Akira's assessment that Hikaru was beginning to play more and more on equal footing with him. The praise had been taken well by Amano, but then Hikaru had already known Akira's appraisal of him, he had his respect. _Akira, I'll beat you one of these times. Someday soon._

 _###_

"I'm home!"

Removing his shoes as he entered the house, Hikaru glanced into the kitchen where his mother was preparing tea. Turning to look at his arrival, his mother said, "Oh Hikaru, you have a guest waiting for you in your room."

Cocking an eyebrow, Hikaru replied, "A guest? Who is it?"

"I don't know who she is. She said she was a friend of yours though, a real pretty girl. Now what was her name?"

Opening the door, Hikaru looked into his room to see Nase sitting near his bed, having looked up at him when the door opened. Taking a step in, Hikaru asked, "Nase, um… hello. What are you doing here?"

Standing up, Nase began to panic, replying hastily. "Oh, I'm sorry if I shouldn't have come. I got your address from Isumi, and your mother told me to wait in here. I… um, that is…"

Closing the door behind him, Hikaru moved towards the bed, stopping a few feet shy and said, "Is there something you wanted to talk to me about?"

Looking hesitant, Nase answered, "Well…" Hikaru motioned for her to have a seat as he slumped down on the floor next to his bed. Following suit, Nase continued, "I wanted to know… if you meant what you said before, about thinking that I would pass the pro exam this year?"

Rather surprised at this, Hikaru answered back, "Sure I did. You've gotten a lot stronger since the last time we played. I think you'll pass the exam more easily than I did. Don't you think you can pass the exam?"

Turning her head down and away from Hikaru, Nase wiped her hand along her eye. "I guess, it's just…I'm just not so sure… I'm eighteen this year, so if I don't pass then I can't stay an insei anymore."

"So what," Hikaru replied, "Isumi didn't pass when he was eighteen and he was still able to turn pro. You could always take the exam as an outsider."

Nase just sighed. "If I don't pass it this year, I don't know if I should keep trying. Iijima quit two years ago after he failed, and focused on college. I've been trying for so long, just like he did, and I still haven't passed. I'm just so scared and worried and…"

Concern swept across Hikaru's face. He'd passed the exam on his first try, so he'd never really given much thought on how hard it must be to stay an insei for so long. Sure back when Isumi had almost quit Hikaru had thought about it some, but at the time he'd had other things to focus on. Nase was almost in that same position now, of course she'd be worried. She was strong though, surely she could see that.

A shiver ran down Nase's spine as she went on, "I know I've gotten better. When you and Waya passed, I finished the exam with more losses than I did wins, then last year I finished with seven losses. Honda though only had six and passed. Back then I thought that had been my best chance, yet somehow I just couldn't give up Go, so I stuck it out. I just keep looking ahead and seeing this dark cloud of what could happen if I fail. I've been an insei for so long, been stuck in place without moving forward, and now I see the finish line coming, my chance to join you, Waya, Honda and Isumi in the pros, and yet if I miss it, stumble even a little…

"At the time I thought I'd give up on my dreams, but after playing a few more games in the Insei League, plus given the fact that I'd defeated Honda who had passed in the pro exam, I changed my mind. You said I've gotten stronger, and that I'll pass the pro exam this year…but I just don't know. Did you really mean it, Shindou?"

Seeing tears begin to well up in her eyes, Hikaru hesitated for a moment, then with energy in his voice to hopefully raise her spirits he said, "And I told you that I did mean it. You're a strong player Nase! You played with a lot of skill in our game, and had me sweating and everything! You'll pass the exam no problem."

Sniffing, Nase replied, "That's easy for you to say. After all, you've already passed the exam."

Stunned, Hikaru just looked at her as it appeared that tears were imminent. Crawling over towards the corner of his room, Hikaru grabbed his goban and pulled it over to the middle of the floor. "If you want, I'll help you improve your game until the Pro Exam starts."

Nase's head rose up in a flash and surprise covered her face. It was apparent that she had not expected this. "R-really? You'd do that? You'll help me… improve more?"

Hikaru scooted over to the bed again and smiling brightly answered, "Sure, that is if you think a 2 – Dan will be enough help. Any day that I don't have to work or have a game; I'll help you every day I can."

Biting her lip in a vain attempt to fight off the tears, Nase stared at Hikaru, who was just smiling at her like that. He really did have faith in her skills as a Go player. So much faith that he was willing to take time out of his own Go studies, despite all the important games he had coming, and help her gain strength. As the tears began to slide down her cheeks, Nase suddenly leapt forward and threw her arms around Hikaru, hugging him tightly. "Thank you. Thank you…"

Hikaru felt strangely uneasy with the hug… but given how teary Nase was, he decided to just stand still.

 _ **Note** : Yes, you've might have recognised by now: this story is greatly based on Leitbur's fiction "The Never-ending road"._

 _However, I don't use every chapters of "The Never-ending road" and decided to keep the scenes with the Go matches much shorter. There will be Nase in this story, too, but not anywhere nearly as much as in "The Never-ending road". She's the part of "Never-ending road" that I like the least. If you like her better, I'll recommend Leitbur's instead._


	7. Facing an old Sensei

vii

If there was one thing that Shirakawa felt each time that he played against Hikaru Shindo, it was astonishment and awe. This game was no different. Placing a stone down calmly, Shirakawa waited as Hikaru took his time. He never rushed the game when he unless needed, and he gave such good thought to critical areas too. It was hard to believe the amount of strength Hikaru had gained in three short years. This was the kid to whom not too long ago he had shown how capture stones, and now here he was playing that same boy in the 3rd round of the Kisei Tournament's Final Preliminary.

The buzzer sounded indicating that it was now lunchtime. Shirakawa rose to his feet, noticing that Hikaru studied the board for a moment or two longer before he too rose to his feet.

###

Entering the lunch area, Hikaru made his way to the refrigerator in the corner. Opening it up, he took out the bag lunch his mother had made for him along with his bottle of Hawaiian Splash. Opening it and taking a quick drink, Hikaru turned and scanned the room, looking for somewhere to sit. As he did so his eye caught Akira moving off toward the exit. Akira, his game couldn't be over already could it? Taking another look around, Hikaru took off after his rival.

Walking out of the lunch area, Hikaru looked about and found Akira sitting by himself in the lobby on a bench, leaning back against the wall with eyes closed. His long eyelashes rest on his cheeks. His head tilted lightly on the back. Hikaru couldn't help notice what a long dainty neck Akira had. He must have been trying to clear his head, focus on his game. It had to be an intense battle if Akira needed to act like this during the break. He had no lunch with him, but that wasn't surprising, Akira never ate during the lunch break.

Hesitating for a moment, Hikaru walked over and sat down next to his rival, pulling out a sandwich from his bag and taking a bite into it. As he finished chewing and swallowed, without even glancing over, he said, "Nice day today."

Eyes still closed, Akira answered, "Yes, it's nice out today."

Finishing off another bite Hikaru replied, "So, you're playing your 2nd Round match in the Honinbo Final Preliminary today against Kujirai 8 – Dan right?"

Inhaling and exhaling softly, Akira replied, "Yes, and you have your 3rd Round match in the Kisei Final Preliminary today against Shirakawa 7 – Dan."

Taking a sip from his drink, Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, Shirakawa is a strong opponent. He won't be easily defeated. The same for Kujirai 8 – Dan?"

Still without opening his eyes, Akira nodded. "Yes, he wouldn't have gotten this far if he wasn't a strong opponent."

Hikaru chuckled. "Must be nice, getting to skip the 1st and 2nd preliminary rounds and all."

A slight annoyance appearing across Akira's voice at those words, he responded, "That's what making the Honinbo League means."

"No," Hikaru retorted, "that's what falling out of the Honinbo League means."

Frowning, but still not opening his eyes, Akira answered back, "I don't need to hear that from someone who couldn't even make it out of the Honinbo 2nd Preliminary."

"Yeah well if you don't get back into the Honinbo League this year then it might be lonely for you back in the 1st Preliminary while I'm playing to get into the League."

This elicited a chuckle from Akira. "That's a pretty bold statement. Hope you can back it up."

Smirking, Hikaru chided back, "Don't worry, I won't lose. You better worry more about yourself."

Akira once again chuckled. "You always were brash, hope your play matches up. After all, I've already advanced to the Final Round of the Kisei Final Preliminary." He paused for a long moment, then in a more somber tone added, "It's been a few weeks since you last came to the Go Salon. I go there almost everyday, but you didn't come…"

Hikaru nodded as he swallowed another bite of sandwich, still not looking over at Akira. "Yeah, I've been pretty busy. Lots of things going on and all. Sandwich?"

Hikaru offered half of his sandwich to Akira. Akira shook his head. "No thanks. Shindou…?"

Pulling his sandwich away and taking a bite out of it, Hikaru answered, "Yes Touya?"

"Why don't you stop by the salon after your game today. We can go over today's games."

This caused Hikaru's eyes to glance over towards Akira – Akira sounded almost pleading to him. _Could it really be?_

"Ok, it sounds like fun." Finishing off his sandwich, Hikaru took one more sip of his drink and stood up. Taking a step away he paused and looking over his shoulder at Akira said, "We can review my win today, so I hope we won't be reviewing your loss." With that he took off towards the game room.

At Hikaru's words Akira's eyes had shot open. His loss? Hikaru planned to win today; said he would, and meanwhile Akira might lose himself? No, that would not happen. A fire suddenly blazed in Akira's eyes, stirred by the words of his rival. _I will not lose today Hikaru. Watch, I will continue to rise, I will not let you pass by me. Come after me, I will be waiting for you, but I will not lose before then. Watch me._

 _###_

They were almost entering the endgame now.

It really was a sight to witness, Hikaru at age 15, just a 2 – Dan and already pushing at the gates of the Kisei League. Adding in the short amount of time that he had been playing the game only made it more amazing. Yet from the look of things on the board Shirakawa would win this game, unless Hikaru could turn the game around in the endgame. Sadly, that would require Hikaru to play a flawless endgame and for Shirakawa to play a poor one, and he was not green enough to do that.

Klak.

Klak.

Still, Hikaru's existence in the Go world, it was almost unbelievable. Sure Kurata had risen just as fast as Hikaru had, but Kurata had a mentor for nearly that entire time. Hikaru, with only a school Go club and a passion for the game had risen this quickly. Genius.

Lowering his head, Shirakawa resigned.

"Thank you." Hikaru stated nonchalantly, then let out an inner sigh of relief. One more win and he was in the Kisei League.

"Would you like to discuss the game Shirakawa-sensei?"

Grinning, Shirakawa shook his head. "That's all right, I know what went wrong." _I also know just how special a player you are Hikaru. You really are Akira Toya's rival, and one day, you may even surpass both him, and Koyo Toya._

As they finished cleaning off the boards and rising to their feet, Shirakawa said, "By the way Hikaru, Akari has been asking about you at the go class recently."

Hikaru's eyes widened as he looked over to Shirakawa. "Akari has?"

Shirakawa nodded. "Yes, she said that she had not been able to see you recently, and had wanted to know how you were doing. I told her about today's game, as well as your match against Akira Toya in the Young Lions Tournament. She seemed very excited."

Hikaru smiled broadly. "Yeah, Akari would be excited."

Watching Hikaru's facial expressions, Shirakawa smiled and said, "Why don't you come to the Go class this Sunday and see everyone. You can give me a hand with Go problems, and help teach some of the students there. I'm sure Akari would love to see you."

Hikaru kind of wanted to see how much Akari had improved. "Ok, I'll come then."

Shirakawa nodded. "Good, I'll be looking forward to seeing you there, and I'm sure everyone else will be happy to see you as well."


	8. Childhood Memories

viii

Hikaru yawned as he approached the Community Center building. It seemed as if it had been an eternity since he had been here last, but in reality it had been little more than two years ago. Akari had mentioned back then that Shirakawa had been inquiring about him, and he had gone to visit, much like he was again today. The difference now was that he was visiting not as an enthusiastic Go player, but as a pro, as Shirakawa's equal.

"HIKARU!" Akari's face lit up as she ran over, stopping just short lest she tackle him in a hug. "I can't believe you're here. It's been so long since the last time we were together. I've been wondering how you were doing and all, but you've just been so busy it seems studying Go, and I just didn't want to bother you. Oh, but now you've come here. Did Shirakawa-sensei ask you to come?"

"Yeah, Shirakawa-sensei asked me to come today, said I could help out with the class. You're right though, it has been awhile, since graduation right?"

Akari nodded, a bright smile plastered across her face. "Oh, I heard you got to play against Akira Toya again. Sorry to hear you lost, I know you really wanted to beat him."

Hikaru nodded, his smile declining only slightly at the mention of his rival. "Yeah, but there will be other games. I'll beat him sooner or later."

"Beat Toya 3 – Dan, that sounds like a tall order, even for you Shindo."

"I only lost by half a point last time. Defeating him isn't a dream."

"But I know you'll do it, Hikaru!", Akari cheered. "Well we should get going for now. The class will be starting soon."

Hikaru nodded, then glanced up at the television sitting on a shelf in the upper corner of the room. It was showing the 6th game of the Honinbo Finals between Kuwabara Honinbo and Ogata Judan. It was only the first day of the two-day match of course, so the game wouldn't be decided until tomorrow. Still, with Kuwabara leading the best of seven series three games to two, it could be the last game of the series. It was a game that Hikaru would have normally preferred to watch, but today he was here to see Akari. Pulling his eyes away, he smiled again at Akari and made his way towards the Go classroom.

Shirakawa's lecture began and several minutes into it Hikaru began to yawn. While the fundamental fuseki that Shirakawa was discussing was probably quite interesting and helpful for many of the players here, it was boring for someone of Hikaru's level. Trying to find something to keep his interest, not to mention to keep him from falling asleep, Hikaru glanced over at Akari. She was listening to Shirakawa rather intently as he went into a discussion on the nadare. Smiling, Hikaru sighed deeply. It certainly was nice to see Akari again. It was weird really, even though he hadn't spent time in the Haze Go Club for a long time, he had still seen her in the hallways at school on non-game days. Now though he was done with school, and while she was off at high school, he had his job to focus on, his Go.

He and Akari were now in separate worlds, and how that would effect their friendship, the relationship they had with one another, was certainly in question. How did other pro players handle it? Did friends not in the Go Pro world drift away, lost to the devotion to the game? He certainly hoped not, but then he wasn't about to give up his study of Go either. It was a vexing issue that he'd have to address one of these days. Maybe he could ask Waya about it, or Akira.

"Hikaru, would you come up here and help me discuss this please."

Taking a deep breath, Hikaru took one of the magnetic white stones and turned towards the diagram.

Shirakawa nodded, his respect for Hikaru showing in the way he looked at him and Hikaru explain his reasoning for liking the variation, it certainly was looking better in new light. Hikaru continued meanwhile undeterred. "So with White blocking at 8-5, Black can secure with a move to 5-6, and then White will probably hane at 8-6 at which point Black can move to 3-7 to further support, or he can finally make the move at 3-2 securing the corner."

Nodding his head pleasantly at the diagram board, a large grin plastered across his face at seeing the young prodigy at work, Shirakawa thanked Hikaru then turned to the class and said, "Ok everyone, let's play some games."

Turning to leave the front of the room, Hikaru began to make his way back to his seat. This had been the real reason had agreed to come, a chance to play against Akari, to see how strong she had become since their last game almost a year before. The day before he finally played Akira equally as a pro.

###

The sun had already begun to set as Hikaru and Akari began making their way home.

"You've gotten stronger Akari. I'm impressed."

Looking over at him, Akari beamed a smile his way and replied, "You really think so? Even Mr. Akota has trouble against me now….That was a fun class today! You were so good up there explaining that problem, Hikaru."

Looking up at the stars that were just now beginning to appear in the darkening sky, Akari exhaled and smiled. It was such a beautiful evening. "You know Hikaru, when I think about how long we've known each other, it just seems strange, because it feels like we've known each other forever, yet at the same time I can still clearly remember the first time we met like it was just yesterday."

Hikaru smiled, drifting slightly closer to his childhood friend as he did so. "Yeah. Now that I think about it too, it does seem that way."

Turning her head away from the stars to look up at his smiling face, one she so enjoyed looking at, even yearned to look at some nights, Akari added, "I think about you a lot Hikaru. Some nights as I'm walking by your house on my way home I stop and just stare up at your window. I know you're up studying Go when the light's on and I'm tempted to come visit, but then I don't want to disturb you either."

Turning to look down at her, Hikaru replied, "That's stupid. If from time to time you want to stop by I won't mind it."

Akari's face, which had begun to react to his 'stupid' remark, froze and then shifted to a bright smile. So he didn't mind her coming by every so often. "Thanks." Returning her gaze to the night sky, Akari added, "You know, sometimes I miss the old times, when we got to spend all that time together, having fun together… being together."

Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, I miss the old times too. Playing Go in the science room with Tsutsui and Mitani, going to the tournaments together, it was so much fun. Those were really good times. And do you remember that time when Touya stormed into our school to ask me play him, but I just turned him down and closed the curtain? I have made him waited…I have waited and waited,too, until I can worthily face him and answer his moves. "

Closing her eyes, Akari sighed. Yep, all he thought about was Go. Playing and studying Go - that was his passion, what filled his thoughts these days. Why couldn't he see the other things around him that weren't tied to that game? It wasn't that she hated the game, in fact she enjoyed it quite a lot. Still, there was a certain resentment for Go as it had stolen Hikaru away from her. And Touya Akira! Who is that boy to Hikaru? Hikaru has known Akari for his whole lifetime, but yet, even while recalling his childhood memories, he couldn't help including this Toya. Akari took a deep breath and exhaled. Go was his great love, something that nothing and no one could replace within his heart. And Touya Akira is something undetachable to Hikaru's Go world. Akari wondered whether his heart had room for anything, or anyone, else…


	9. Chapter 9

ix

The rain fell softly down onto the roof of Hikaru's house leaving a rather soothing, relaxed atmosphere in the night air. Up on the second floor a light was on in one room where two teenagers were engaged, the rain far from their minds.

Klak.

Klak.

As Hikaru reached to play his next stone he said, "Oh, I won't be able to meet up with you tomorrow."

.

Nase nodded. This wasn't totally surprising. After all, she had just inquired about whether it was good to play tonight. Still, she found her curiosity piqued. "I understand. Still, you don't play any games on Tuesdays, so why won't you be able to meet up?"

Klak.

"Because," Hikaru replied, "I have a teaching job in the morning that will last until around lunch. After that I wanted to head over to Touya's family Go Salon and play a few games against him, get myself ready and all for Thursday."

Well, that certainly made sense. Playing games against Akira Toya, even if they were practice games like this one, must certainly be helpful. That was something that the pros could do, what Hikaru could do that others couldn't; just show up to a Go Salon and play Akira Toya in an even game. It must have been nice.

Klak.

Still, maybe it would be all right if she tagged along, watched his game against Akira. Memories of Hikaru's match against Akira at the Young Lions Tournament flashed through her mind, and Nase found herself imagining a game just like it played at a Go Salon.

Klak.

Snapping back into reality, Nase returned her attention to the board. No, it would be best if she didn't intrude on Shindou's game against Touya Akira. After all, she had to worry about herself, get in as much practice as possible, not watch someone else play, even if that someone else were two geniuses like Akira Toya and Hikaru Shindo. Besides, what if she got in the way of Shindou's game, made him lose focus just by being there. The very thought of her might being able to make Shindou loose focus made her blush.

###

"RETREAT! RETREAT!"

A panicked conglomerate of Go Salon patrons began evacuating the vicinity around the table they had previously surrounded. They had too often seen the pair at the table play over the last year, and knew when things were about to explode. They didn't need to wait long for it either.

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? THAT'S A TERRIBLE MOVE!"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN TERRIBLE? THIS MOVE WILL SUFFICE!"

"Suffice? HA, and you expect to beat Hagiwara 9 – Dan by using moves that suffice?"

Both Hikaru and Akira were, by this point, up out of their chairs and glaring across at one another. Both leaned over the board, hands slammed down on either side as it was unthinkable to slam their hands down on the Go board. "Oh, talking all big and tough just because you already won your Final Kisei match to get into the League huh Toya? Like I'd let you have all the fun in the Kisei League!"

Akira scowled and retorted, "You will be if you keep playing Go like this. Play a move like this one against me in a real match and I'd erase you from the board!"

"No, because I can go here instead, and it now doesn't work for you."

Akira let out half a laugh. "Yeah right! That move leaves you open over here! My goodness Shindo, and to think you claim to be equal to me!"

"Don't get cocky just because I haven't beaten you in an official game yet" Hikaru rebutted. "I will beat you eventually. Besides, you were the one agreeing with me when I was pointing out all those good moves!"

"All those times? I did that twice!"

Hikaru's face became enraged. "TWICE? It wasn't twice, it was four!"

"You were counting? No wonder you couldn't play good Go!"

"Oh yes I can play good Go. Maybe you can't count while playing Go, but what's that say about you?"

"That I actually pay attention to the game! Besides, that was the fifth time you've said 'maybe' to me today!"

"Now you're counting? Was that why you got knocked out of the Honinbo League last year? Keep it up and I'll just pass by you with ease!"

Akira sneered. "Get into the Kisei League before you talk so tough Shindo!"

By this time the two were so close their noses were almost touching, Akira could feel how the blunt bleached bang touches his forehead. Sparks were flying between the two as their intensity rose. Hikaru then added, "So you won't back down Touya?"

Akira just grinned menacingly. "Bring it, if you can."

Grunting abhorrently, Hikaru spun away and marched off shouting, "I'm LEAVING!"

"Wait, Shindou! WAIT!"

Hikaru hesitated for a second…but his chidish pride trumphed. Hepassed by the other patrons who watched him go by partially in shock and partially in awe at the display they had just seen. Hirumi had already grabbed Hikaru's bag, which she handed to him as he walked by and out the door. As he stepped through the doorway, Hikaru turned and glaring back at his rival said, "I'll see you in the Kisei League Touya!" He then turned and left.

Sensing that it was now safe, the patrons began to move back around the room. Several began their post-fight discussion as they often did. "There they go again. You know, you'd think they'd get tired of it after awhile."

"Nah, it's just a way to remind all of us how both Shindo and the Young Master are still kids. I mean, normally the Young Master is so composed."

Another nodded. "Yeah, why he tolerates Shindo like that I don't know. I mean, yeah Shindo has won a game or two, but he's still only a 2 – Dan. The Young Master is now in his second League, or will be once he's back into the Honinbo League. Shindo certainly has some gall trying to compare himself to the Young Master, arguing with him like that."

"He may only be a 2 – Dan, but I'm only a 3 – Dan myself."

The three patrons jumped in surprise as Akira spoke up from behind them. Turning, they observed the young boy. "But Toya-sensei, you'll be a 4 – Dan if you win your next Dan game."

Face cold and taut, Akira replied, "Rank means nothing. It has little to do with a player's true skill, since no matter how strong someone is, everyone starts out as a 1 – Dan. Shindo is not weak, and only a fool would even think to underestimate him. If you don't believe me then play him and see for yourself after he erases you from the game. Just hope the game doesn't cause you to lose your desire to play."

With that Akira turned and walked away calmly back towards the table. The three just turned and looked at one another. "Weren't they just at each others' throats?"

Hirumi, who was walking up towards the three with their tea answered, "Yep, but then they're always like that. I don't even try to understand it anymore." She then gave them their tea and returned to the counter. She's known by now, however intense the two young pros quirrel, Akira just don't like any one badmouthing Hikaru. Hirumi was the one who's always observing Akira since the day he was ten and started going here to play. She was there the day that child entered this Go salon and claim to play Akira, just because he thought he should play against a kid. She saw how Akira has changed since that day.

Sitting down at the table and staring at the game played out on the Go board, Akira sighed inwardly. Why did they always have to end up fighting like this? Sure, as two strong Go players with somewhat different playing styles a conflict on what was the best move was certain to arise, as it had been occurring since the game's creation. Still, he had similar debates with other pros, and never did it erupt like it always seemed to erupt between Hikaru and himself. Perhaps it was the mutual understanding between the two that they were rivals,that urge to compete against one another that caused it. After all, rarely had Akira played a game against someone that carried such intensity as his games against Hikaru carried, especially given the rather lack of truly high stakes such as at the Young Lions Tournament. Winning the tournament meant nothing to him; it wasn't as if it was a big title. It was the rivalry between them that had triggered the intensity.

Then there was the credit, or lack there of, that Hikaru was given in comparison to himself. After all, his own arrival on the pro scene had been huge; the stories of his skill having arrived before his pro career had even begun. The fact that his father had been Toya Meijin only added to the frenzy as everyone wanted to watch Toya Meijin's son climb the pro ranks.

It had not been his father or any other pro player that had caused his star to rise as it had though. That was solely Hikaru's doing. The knowledge that Hikaru was coming up, that he would soon be before him had spurred him on with such passion that he had improved and risen far faster than he would have otherwise. Ogata had been right, his spirit had been lacking until he had heard of Hikaru joining the insei ranks. His rival was coming, and he had to be ready.

Yet none of that credit had been given to Hikaru by anyone save himself and maybe one or two other individuals who understood the truth behind it. Hikaru was an unknown, virtually coming out of nowhere, and his arrival, which by all rights should have been trumpeted as loudly as his own, had gone unnoticed by most. Akira knew though, he knew that Hikaru was an equally blessed genius at the game. Their match at the Young Lions Tournament had laid to rest any last doubts in Akira's mind as to that fact.

That had been why he had finally admitted officially to Amano after the game that Hikaru was his rival. Though Amano had yet to publish the article, it would be out in the next edition of Monthly Go and then people would know. Or would they? The word 'rival' was tossed around so casually by some these days. He was quite certain that the other insei that had passed along with Hikaru considered Hikaru to be their rival, yet to use such a rivalry to compare to his own seemed foolish. There would be many though who might read it as being just that, a friendly rivalry, an acknowledgement by the great Akira Toya that Hikaru Shindo was a strong player. They didn't understand the depth of the rivalry, the passion, the pure pleasure gained in facing Hikaru.

Eternal rivals, pulled together by the strings of fate and destined to do battle, allowing nothing to get in the way, that was the true depth of their rivalry. They were also…friends? he'd say, but so much of that friendship seemed irrevocably tied to their rivalry that the two were almost indistinguishable. The rivalry and the friendship were based on one another, and could not be pulled apart. The joy and pleasure each of them pulled out of the Go that two geniuses could create could never be described, let alone understood, by anyone who did not experience it firsthand.

Hikaru was his equal; he had caught up at last. All that separated them now was the experience that Akira held from his high stake games in the Honinbo League, experience that would be wiped away should Hikaru win on Thursday. When that last difference was erased, the two would be left side by side.

Hikaru had started the race after him, but now he was dashing at Akira's footsteps, the sound of his footsteps pounding in Akira's ears, his breath breathing along his neck. Soon, Akira knew, he would find Hikaru running side by side with him, even on the never-ending road, and in that moment the two would turn their heads and see one another, eyes meeting.

If time froze in that one instant, what would be seen? What would the feeling be, the effect of the meeting of their eyes upon the other? Would one pull ahead of the other, only to be overtaken again and again, or would they hold that moment, and continue down the road side by side? That was the answer Akira sought from his rival, that which would give true meaning to the nature and purpose of their rivalry. Soon Hikaru would be there, and he would discover the truth of whether they truly existed to compliment the Go of each other. Akira could see it clearly, the moment of truth fast approaching, and he would be there waiting when it came.


	10. Who is this girl?

x

Down the hallway and to the right Hikaru kneeled before the goban, eyes closed. Across the way at the far end of the L-shaped table used by the score keeper and other observers sat Akira. His gaze was focused down at the table in front of him, lost in his own thoughts. Neither had even looked at the other when Hikaru had arrived, something that remained true even now.

Minutes ticked by and at last another person arrived. Honda stopped in the middle of the entrance, shocked by what he saw in the room. He had been tapped to keep the game record for today's match, something that he was quite willing to do since it would be a great match to observe. It wasn't Hikaru's early arrival that surprised him though, that was actually quite common. What surprised him was the other occupant of the room.

Akira's eyes shot up to observe Honda standing there and a slight sharpness hit Honda. The look in those eyes, it was almost as if Akira was about to play the game, but whatever that force had been it had certainly snapped Honda back into reality. Making his way into the room now, Honda passed by Hikaru and took his seat at the game recorder's table. From the entrance, and even from his seat now Honda would have thought that Hikaru looked calm and still, yet as he had walked by he had noticed it; the slight shaking. _Hmm, must be nervous. Not that I blame him, this game is huge for him. I'd probably be shaking too. Just one thing Hikaru, please PLEASE don't play at the pace you did at the Young Lions Tournament. I don't think I could keep up with that._

Another few minutes passed, and at last Hikaru's opponent arrived. Entering the room, Hagiwara looked down at Hikaru. So this was his opponent, the young upstart 2 – Dan that had made it this far. The rumors he had heard, about the boy's lack of a mentor, his quick rise to the pro level, even one saying he was Akira Toya's rival. Not that he believed the last one, it was probably just a result of his recent success. It was what the Go world wanted, a powerful young rival for Toya, one that would push him higher, as if Toya wasn't enough himself. It was time to see if the rumors were true.

Glancing away, Hagiwara did a double take as his eyes fell upon Akira who was now watching him. Memories of that game almost a year ago flooded back, the game where he had faced Akira for the right to enter the Honinbo League. That loss had been painful, and it had pushed him to improve his Go even more. Now here Akira was again, this time the observer, already a member of the Kisei League. But why would Akira be here unless…

Hagiwara's eyes shot down to Hikaru, whose eyes still remained closed as if waiting for a sign. Could the rumors have been true? Taking his seat before the goban, Hagiwara watched his opponent. If the rumors were true, if this was someone who could go head to head with Akira Toya, then not only would he have to be serious, as he would have been anyway, but careful as well. _This boy may not be as weak as I had thought. Still, the weight of this match must be weighing on him. He's shaking; he must be trying to calm himself by closing his eyes like that. Well this game means a lot for me too, but this is his first chance to enter the Kisei League. Will he have the fortitude?_

Just then more movement appeared at the door and Amano entered, followed closely by Nase. Looking around nervously as she entered the room, Nase spotted Honda who looked up at her quizzically. Averting her eyes away from him, red with embarrassment, her eyes came to fix on the other person already seated at the table and she gasped. Akira Toya was here to watch the game, just as she was, and right now, he was staring right at her, confusion beginning to appear on his face as well.

She then looked down at the two players before the board, Hagiwara already watching her. Then Hikaru's eyes opened and his head turned to face her. As his gaze fixed on her, Hikaru's face lit up in a friendly smile. "Nice of you come."

He gave her one last look and then returned to his previous position, his eyes remaining open now and staring down at the board. Hesitating a moment longer, Nase exhaled and walked over to a spot next to the scorer's table and took a seat next to Akira. As she sat down, Akira turned and looked at her, though his lips remained closed. It was obvious that he was quite curious why she had come, and to be honest Nase was beginning to wonder that herself. She had wanted to come and support Hikaru, to repay him in some sense for all of his help over the last month. Originally she had not planned on coming, but her desire to see Hikaru play this game, not to mention her curiosity of what such a big match actually looked like, had brought her here. Still, if she ended up distracting him…

Finally Akira's gaze left Nase and came to rest on his rival. _That girl_ … he was pretty sure that she was an insei, having a vague memory of playing her in the Pro Exam. Hikaru had been trembling since he had sat down, but had stopped the moment he had seen the girl. Who was she? The tremble though was now back, and that was good. Unlike the others, Akira had recognized it for what it truly was; the Warrior's Tremble. It was not fear, but anticipation for the approaching battle that caused Hikaru to tremble like that. The last thing Akira wanted was to see Hikaru distracted, not when he was so close to joining him in the League. _Come Hikaru, show me your strength, show me you are capable._

Reaching into the bowl, Hikaru pulled out and dropped a single black stone as Hagiwara dropped a small handful of white stones onto the board. Several seconds of counting revealed twelve stones, Hagiwara would be black. Exchanging bowls, the players' eyes met as they both said, "Onegaishimasu."

Klak.

As Hikaru's finger left the stone, Hagiwara blinked. That move… it was brilliant. Not only was it hard to take, but it was going to make holding the lower left corner difficult. He had played it so casually too. Glancing at his clock time, Hagiwara looked up at his opponent and nearly gasped. Hikaru's face was calm, devoid of emotion as he stared down at the board, but this was not what had hit Hagiwara so forcefully.

Those eyes, the fire in them, the power, it was amazing. This was not just a boy, but rather a dangerous beast, a lion whose fangs were now being bared at him with a hungry glee. The pressure wasn't phasing him at all; he was enjoying this. Grunting as he placed his own stone down in an attempt to block the plan the previous move had set up so well, Hagiwara returned his focus to the board. It was impressive, but he too was not just a human now, he was a demon, and he would give no ground, show no kindness.

Klak.

Klak.

Klak.

Klak. Klak.

As Hikaru's finger left the stone the buzzer sounded announcing the arrival of lunch. Hagiwara exhaled and rose, happy to be able to escape the atmosphere for a bit.

Amano, Akira, Honda and Nase too also rose from their seats and began to make their way to the door. As they did so however everyone realized that Hikaru had not yet risen, but was motionless, eyes scanning over the board. Akira too had moved not with the rest of the group but to the board, and standing above it now looked down in deep thought. Nase sighed and turned to leave. She had seen that look in Hikaru's eyes before; he wouldn't be going anywhere for at least another minute or two. Best to get something to eat.

###

Sitting off by herself in the lunch area, Nase took a bite out of her cheeseburger. It didn't feel right being here, amongst all these high level pros. She was merely an insei after all; she was nothing to all the players around her. It had been best to sit alone.

Chewing and swallowing, she followed it up with a sip of her drink. Her mind though was not on her lunch, but on the game she had just seen. This was the second time she'd seen this other side of Hikaru, and it was hard to comprehend. Normally he was all smiles and laughter, so carefree and fun to be around. Sure he could put on that calm, serious face when he played, but then so could she. That intensity though, to be able to bend the game and the physical reaction of an opponent with an act of will, that was something she was not accustomed to seeing Hikaru do.

It was suffocating, the very energy in the air giving all a good hint on just what effect it was having on the players. Nase sighed. _Could I ever be able to play a game like that? All that intensity and power? Hikaru's a genius, so of course he can do it. But me…_

"Mind if I join you?"

Looking up from her meal, Nase gasped. Akira Toya was standing there looking down at her. Her face once again flushing in embarrassment, Nase hastily nodded. "Umm, yeah sure uh… Toya-sensei…umm, I mean…"

Letting out a slight smirk as he sat down, Akira replied, "Toya is fine. I don't mind."

Nodding, Nase looked over at Akira nervously. _What could he possibly want to sit with me for?_

Taking a slight breath, Akira looked squarely at Nase and said, "You're an insei correct?" Nase again nodded. His expression turning serious now, Akira continued, "I thought so. Your name was…?"

"Nase. Asumi Nase."

Akira nodded. "Nase huh? Forgive me, but I would like to know your connection to Hika… to Shindo."

Blinking at the question, Nase suddenly fought to withhold a giggle. So she wasn't the only person who struggled at times with how to address Hikaru. This made sense now, Akira was inquiring about her as Hikaru's rival. Now if only she had a truly solid answer. "Well, I guess I'm sort of his student."

Surprise covered Akira's face. This was obviously not what he'd expected. His mouth beginning to hang open slightly, Akira regained himself and said, "H-his student? Shindou has a student?"

Nase nodded, noting that in his surprise he had reverted to his more informal reference to Hikaru. "Yeah, it's kind of weird though, he's very informal. He's helping me prepare for the Pro Exam, and he's been teaching me for the last month now."

Raising his hand to his chin as he looked down and contemplated this answer, Akira replied, "I see." After a long moment that had given Nase a chance to eat some more of her burger Akira looked back up at her and said, "Why though? What is it about you that would make Hikaru agree to take you on as a student?"

Shaking her head, Nase took another sip from her drink. "I don't know. After we played at the Young Lions Tournament he complimented me on my play, and then a month ago I talked to him again and he volunteered to teach me. I don't know why though."

Eyes fixed on her, seriousness stretched across his face, Akira sounded thougtfully, "There must be something about you that intrigues him. Shindou is not just anyone, he wouldn't take on a student without a reason."

Sliding her lunch tray aside, Nase lowered her chin down onto her folded arms on the table counter and replied, "I don't know. I thought before he was playing me seriously, but now I'm beginning to wonder if he's not taking it easy on me despite his claims to the contrary."

Cocking his eyebrow, Akira responded, "Why do you say that?"

Nase sighed. "Because I watch him play you like at the Young Lions Tournament, or just now, and I see the intensity and passion he puts into the game and realize that he doesn't play like that with me. Maybe he doesn't think I can handle it… and he might be right too."

At that remark a grin cracked through Akira's serious complexion and he began to chuckle. Looking up at him as he did so, Nase began to wonder what was so funny about that. Finally Akira answered, "It has nothing to do with taking you seriously. That kind of intensity can never be created in a mere pick up game. If Hikaru says he's taking you seriously then I'm sure he is."

Raising her head up out of her arms, Nase blinked in comprehension. "So you mean that…"

"When faced in a real battle, a player can transform from his usual self into a more frightening figure. It can't be invoked at will; it's something that is brought out of each player by the game itself. Shindou is focused on victory, and that desire to win is what you are seeing. It has nothing to do with going easy on you."

Nase exhaled and smiled. So Hikaru did take her seriously. She still might not know the answer to why he was teaching her, but then it didn't really matter right now. What was important was that she was getting stronger thanks to his help, and if all went well, she'd join him as a pro by the end of the year.

"We should get going. The game should be starting up again about now."

Nase rose and took her tray to the trashcan. She then began to follow Akira back down the hallway towards the game room, staying several feet behind. He was right, she still had some time to think about why she played Go, and in the meantime she could support Hikaru in his game.

As they approached the door to the room where Hikaru and Hagiwara were playing, the sound of stone on wood indicating that the game had started up again, Akira stopped. Then without looking back he said, "After this game is over, I would very much like to play a game against you, if you don't mind that is."

With that, not even waiting for an answer, Akira walked into the room leaving Nase standing there in shock. _Akira Toya wants to play… me?_ Taking a deep breath, Nase allowed her nerves to calm. Yes, he would after hearing all she had told him. Well, she'd just have to show him what kind of Go she could play. After all, this wasn't something that happened every day.


	11. Welcome to the Kisei League!

Feeling a drop of sweat run down the back of his neck, Hikaru placed his stone down. He had played a well balanced, collected game thus far and was still quite in it. Yet the length of the game, his opponent was milking the game clock and holding a tempo on the speed of the game that was beginning to wear on Hikaru's psyche. Before the lunch break he had thought he was about to bust the game open and force a resignation, but his opponent had come back from lunch with a renewed strength and begun to land blows.

Klak.

Klak. Klak.

Amano blinked at the last move by Hagiwara. That had been faster than before. It was quite obvious that Hagiwara was trying to force the pace of the game so that Hikaru would begin to think more, and in so doing contemplate the immensity of the game.

Rising from his seat, Amano silently maneuvered himself out of the room and made his way off towards the monitor room. Unlike most other places in the building, smoking was allowed there and it was the closest place available.

As he walked into the room he discovered though that someone else had also thought of the idea of smoking here. "Kuwabara-sensei. Congratulations again on defending the Honinbo Title. Ogata certainly made it a good series though."

Blowing a puff of smoke out through his lips, Kuwabara chuckled and replied, "Yeah, but that boy's young, he'll have plenty of time once I'm gone. Not that I plan on going anywhere soon hehe."

Amano smiled as he moved to sit down across from Kuwabara. "Have you finished your game then?"

Kuwabara flicked his head in ascent as he took another puff from his cigarette. "Yeah, I put Serizawa in his place. These younger players, they think they're up and coming and can push us old folks around. I find it humorous really."

Amano nodded. "So Kuwabara-sensei defeats Serizawa 9 – Dan in the 2nd Round of the Tengen Tournament. So next you'll either play Kurata or Hatanaka. Any preference?"

Chuckling as he finished off his cigarette and reached to light another, Kuwabara leaned back further in his chair and answered, "Not at all. More young blood to chafe. I tell you though Amano, for the longest time the young players weren't all that good, but since Akira Toya arrived things have gone up. Just thinking about this new wave gets my blood pumping through these old veins. It makes you look forward to what's coming, and makes this old man want to keep playing until I can face them. Especially that one kid. I tell you, his true strength hasn't even begun to show itself. It could be unfathomable."

Amano blinked. "Are you referring to Hikaru Shindo?"

Kuwabara nodded. "Yep. So how's Toya's rival doing over there?"

Pulling out his notepad and scribbling down Kuwabara's last comment, as he was still fine tuning his article on Akira and Hikaru, Amano answered, "It's pretty close right now. Hagiwara has the advantage, but they're just starting to near the endgame, so who knows. What surprised me though is that Toya came to watch the match."

Cocking an eyebrow, Kuwabara nodded with a knowing grin and began to laugh. "So Akira Toya came to watch the game huh? Interesting…" Putting out his cigarette in the ashtray, Kuwabara then added, "If that boy is here too, then Shindo will win the game for sure."

Amano then watched as Kuwabara stood up from his seat before he replied, "That's a rather confident assessment of Shindo. I know he's strong, but his opponent isn't giving him an inch."

Having begun to make his way towards the door, Kuwabara looked over his shoulder and answered, "You don't get it Amano. There's no way that boy lets himself lose while his rival is there watching." He then cackled again and walked out the door.

Back in the game room the game had continued to play out, and witnessing it all was Akira. Eyes focused on the board, Akira watched on in silence as Hagiwara played his next move. The board position was getting complicated now and Hikaru was beginning to run out of options. Sure in a few minutes Hagiwara would enter byoyomi, but if Hikaru couldn't find a way to come back it wouldn't matter much.

However unlike previously in the match Hikaru had not played immediately after Hagiwara's move. This wasn't exactly surprising, since the board position was tough to work with just now. Akira knew as well as Hikaru did that an attack of some sort was needed, but unfortunately it just wasn't that simple given the current board. Moving into that territory too deeply would just widen the gap, yet a cautious approach wouldn't get the job done. Playing a hane on that one stone would win him a stone, maybe two, but Hagiwara would use that time to solidify his position in the middle of the board and it would be over.

Akira's heart began to sink. It was not looking good at all for Hikaru, and try as both young pros could there seemed to be no move that would help. So that would mean that Hikaru's best chance was to capitalize on the lack of time Hagiwara would have in the endgame, use careless mistakes to reverse the score. It didn't seem like it would be enough though. Turning his eyes for a moment to Hikaru, he saw the look of desperation beginning to creep onto his face, the sinking feeling of inevitability and Akira sighed inwardly. _Is this all that Hikaru can do then? He… no I was so sure he'd make into the League, and yet now… it's been a wonderful game, but I just don't see any…_

Suddenly Akira's eyes widened and he gasped lightly under his breath. There, what if Hikaru were to attach there then he…

Before Akira could even finish his thought on the move a flash ran through Hikaru's eyes as his hand darted down to his Go bowl and he placed his stone right where Akira had been looking causing a coy grin to slide across Akira's lips. _So, he was able to see it too._

As Hikaru's hand left the stone an audible gasp was heard from across the board. Hagiwara's face had gone white. It was quite obvious that he had not considered that move at all, and as Akira noted from the nearly inaudible squeak from Nase next to him moments ago, neither had she. Now Black would have to respond or else risk losing territory, enough territory in fact to reverse the outcome. As sweat once again began to slide down Hagiwara's nose and he responded with a hane Akira struggled not to chuckle. _Well done Hikaru!_

As Hikaru placed a stone down Amano returned to the room and took his seat next to Honda. Looking over to check the game record, Amano spotted Hikaru's recent move and paled himself. He didn't know as much about Go strategy as the others in the room, but he certainly understood the importance of that attachment. Looking back up at Hagiwara, Amano observed the sweat dripping down his brow as he made his move. That move, it appeared, hadn't just potentially narrowed the gap, the tempo of the game was beginning to shift back to Hikaru, and the atmosphere in the room was only confirming it more. _Perhaps Kuwabara was right after all. Now if he can just catch up a little more._

Klak. Klak.

Klak. Klak.

The game was beginning to pick up, the moves coming faster and faster. Looking up at his opponent, Hagiwara frowned. Hikaru had opened up his fan now to cover his lower face.

The two players stared down at the board for a moment, then began to count out the points. A solemn expression covered Hagiwara's face, a slight anxiety as stones slid on the board. Hikaru meanwhile held the same calm demeanor as always, though the passionate fire in his eyes was now gone. There was no more need for such eyes; the game was over as the seemingly decreasing room temperature indicated.

The last few stones were slid into place, and a moment later both players let out sighs. Then silently, his own lips taut and measured, Hikaru rose up from his seat and fan in hand turned towards the door.

Hikaru Shindo had made it into the Kisei League!


	12. Chapter 12

_! Important: Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 12**

"So," Waya said, breaking the silence, "have you heard anything yet about the Kisei League, Shindou? Like who you'll be playing first or when?"

"All I've gotten so far is that I'm in Group A. They said that the rest of the information would be arriving shortly."

Frowning, Waya then looked up at the ceiling. "I wonder if you'll have to play Sensei."

Hikaru shrugged, memories of his game against Morishita back in January flooding forward. "Maybe. There's a lot of strong players in it though."

Waya nodded. "Yeah, like Zama Oza, Ogata Judan, Nogi Tengen, Serizawa 9 – Dan, umm, who else?"

"Touya's in it too." Hikaru then reached over and grabbed the most recent copy of Weekly Go and tossed it to Waya. "Here, the list is in there."

Catching the paper and opening it to the correct page, Waya began scanning the list. "Let's see… wow, everyone on this list is either a titleholder or a 9 – Dan except Kurata, Toya, and you. Of course Ichiryu's here, being the former Kisei before Ishibashi took it away from him. Yeah, good luck with all of these players." His voice going distant now, Waya added, "Still, it does sound like fun."

Hikaru nodded but remained silent. He could tell that his friend was envious, and he really couldn't blame him for it. The two had become pros together, yet he was now in the Kisei League while Waya was still struggling to get out of the 1st Preliminaries. Even Ochi had made it into the Honinbo 2nd Preliminary last year. It was frustrating for Waya, and Hikaru knew it. Still, there wasn't much he could say, not while he was playing in the Kisei League.

###

"Hikaru, Nase's here." The voice of his mom broke his chain of thought.

Nase told him to his surprise to have played a game with Touya at his family's Go salon the other day. Hikaru just couldn't understand, why Touya chose to play a game with Nase of all people. But Nase said she didn't know why either. _To test the strength of his rival's student, perhaps?_

A little ways in Nase said, "After we finished playing, Touya mentioned that my play didn't really reflect Shusaku all that much as he would have thought." This brought Hikaru's eyes up from the board. "He said that since you study Shusaku all the time that he would have expected a little more of it to appear in my play." Nase paused, and Hikaru was beginning to worry slightly. It was only because Sai had played all of Shusaku's games, and he had played Sai all the time, that his own Go reflected Shusaku so much. "His comments confused me though since you and I have never studied a Shusaku game here in all of the lessons. In fact, I haven't even _seen_ a Shusaku game record in here before."

At this Nase's eyes raised to meet Hikaru's, whose face was beginning to sweat slightly. This was not something he was very comfortable with, and really he wasn't even sure how he should, or even could, explain it. Finally he said, "Did you mention that to Touya?"

Nase nodded, having stopped placing stones now. "Yeah, I said that I'd never seen any game records of Shusaku over here, but that I'd never inquired either. He seemed really surprised by it too. Shindou I…" Nase cut herself short. Hikaru's face, it was sweating. Waya had mentioned to her when they had first started these lessons that Hikaru was surrounded in some sort of mystery, one that she might get dragged into if she wasn't careful. At the time she had just taken it as something stupid Waya had come up with to scare her, but now she wasn't so sure. Still, she didn't want to make him uncomfortable. "Never mind, now, about this move here that I made…"

Exhaling in relief, Hikaru returned his eyes to the goban. Still, his mind was on what she'd said, and what Akira would think now. Of all those around him, Akira had come the closest to the truth. This would only add to his desire to know the truth behind his strength, and while he had promised to tell Akira one day, this was not the time he had in mind. That could wait though, now was the time to focus on Nase and her game.

###

"Really Hikaru, must you always go up there and look at that goban whenever you come over? I already told you that you can have it."

Making his way down the stairs from the loft, Hikaru answered, "No, that's ok Grandpa. The one you gave me is fine."

"My goodness," Heihachi Shindo replied, "just what do you expect to find up there, a ghost or something?"

Sighing slightly to himself, Hikaru paused a moment as he made his way across the yard and into the house. "…A ghost would be great, Grandpa!"

""Child, you are weird!" Walking off and returning a short minute later with a goban, Heihachi set the board down and said, "So, you're in the Kisei League now. Must be exciting."

Sitting down in front of the board, Hikaru shrugged. "I guess. Honestly I'm not sure if it's really sunk in yet, even though my friends can't stop asking me about it."

Sitting down now himself Heihachi inhaled. "I see. Well I'm sure you'll do just fine when the time comes. Now let's nigiri."

Frowning, Hikaru replied, "Oh come on Grandpa, we went over this the last time. I'm a pro, put down some stones. I won't tell anyone that you put down stones against me."

Smiling as he reached for the stones, Heihachi replied, "You don't get it Hikaru. It has nothing to do with other people knowing. I'll know, and I couldn't live with myself if I did that. You're my grandson, and always will be. Now nigiri."

Sighing as he reached for the stones, Hikaru then muttered, "You're just as stubborn as Akira."

Exchanging bowls so that he could play black, Heihachi then said, "So, you play often with this Touya boy?"

"Yes, weekly at his family's Go salon. It's much fun, you know, Grandpa, we play games after games and then discuss them…I mean…it's not like we have the same opinions about moves….but yeah, it's so much fun playing him!"

The pair then bowed and said, "Onegaishimasu."

Heihachi couldn't help noticing how the eyes of his grandchild dance with joy when he mentioned that Touya boy. Desiring a change of subject, he said, "So, what else have you been up to? Your mother mentioned something about a pretty young girl coming over to your house a lot lately."

Ka-chi.

Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, that's Nase. I'm sort of helping her prepare for the Pro Exam. Well, that was why I had originally, but I'm not quite sure if it's more than that now."

Cocking his eyebrow, Heihachi responded, "Something more? Do you like this Nase girl, Hikaru? I mean…you sort of have a career now, it's not too soon for me to think about some grandchildren, you know."

"NO!" Hikaru shot back. "Damn Grandpa, not you too. I hear it enough from Waya and the others. Please give me a break. She's my friend and student, that's all."

"Why am I not so sure about that?" Heihachi laughed.

Ka-chi.

Hikaru placed a stone, ignoring his granda's remark.


	13. A nightmare list of Names

It had been something that had been eating at Hikaru for the last day or so, ever since he'd received the new schedule for his next Meijin and Honinbo matches. He had still not received anything on the Kisei League and it was now the beginning of August. _Will they_ ever _get around to informing me about the League?_

As if in answer to his thoughts, Hikaru suddenly heard his mother call up to him, "Hikaru, you have a letter from the Go Association! It's bigger than your normal game card too."

A jolt flew up Hikaru's spine as he leapt out of the computer chair and bolted through the door and down the stairs. This had to be it, the information on the Kisei League. Excitement and adrenaline rushing through his body as he snatched the letter from his mother, remembering a second later to thank her, Hikaru turned and tore open the letter, not even bothering to head back up to his room first. Pulling the letter out and opening it, Hikaru scanned the contents and then froze, the hair on the back of his neck starting to stand on end. A moment later a shiver ran down his spine, although to be honest, Hikaru wasn't sure whether it was one of fear or excitement. This… it was simply amazing.

###

"What! The list came? That's great! Here, lets take a look."

Waya lunged for the paper in Hikaru's hand excitedly, like a child who had just seen the new toy he'd wanted so badly in his parent's hands. Hikaru however pulled the letter away and tried to move off, but the others who had arrived already were moving over too, interested just as much as Waya was to see the breakdown of the Kisei League.

Moving around the goban now, Hikaru opened up the letter and as the group looked down at the League breakdown their eyes widened.

 **Group A** :

1) Ogata - 6

2) Zama - 5

3) Toya - 4

4) Shindo - 3

5) Ichiryu - 2

6) Kuwabara - 1

 **Group B:**

1) Nogi - 6

2) Serizawa - 5

3) Morishita - 4

4) Hatanaka - 3

5) Kurata - 6

Mizunuma - 1

"Whoa," Waya blurted out. "Look at the names in your Group Shindo. Talk about a nightmare list of names. Well, at least you won't be playing against Sensei."

Nodding as a bead of sweat slid down his temple, Isumi added, "Yeah, but still, I mean look, Kuwabara Honinbo right out of the gate."

Honda however had been more interested at the end of the list. "Wow, look at that, Hikaru gets to finish up the League against Akira Toya. What a way to finish, a clash of the rivals."

Hikaru nodded, he had noticed that as well when he'd first looked at the list, and it was really the best part about that list of names. Regardless of the outcomes of his other matches, he would indeed get a chance to face Akira again before the year was over, and on such a stage as this.

Along with the excitement came the doubt. _Am I ready to face these names already?_ _Did Akira feel this sort of doubt, perhaps even a little dread, at the thought of such high-ranked matches?_ This was what they had meant by high level experience, the ability to play such games and handle them accordingly without panicking or breaking down mentally. _How had Akira managed it?_ Having to face the holder of the Honinbo Title was not exactly a walk in the park, but at least it was manageable. He had to forget the big picture, banish from his mind the Kisei Title at the end of this particular road, and focus on the little things, the things he could control. And that started with the first match, the only match that he could allow to matter right now. "One game at a time."


	14. Shindou vs the Honinbou I

Standing in the elevator as it took him up towards the fifth floor, Hikaru waited with nervous anticipation. The butterflies were dancing in his stomach this morning and he had to admit that his confidence was not at the same level it had been during the Hagiwara match. In some ways the pressure in this match was a little less in that it was not a life and death match where the loser was eliminated. Still, the round robin format actually was rather worse than a normal knockout format in that it not only relied on the player's own skill, but also on the skill of all the other players in the other matches. While he could lose a match and still continue on, he then had to rely on other players losing as well to keep himself in contention. It was the Pro Exam all over again, except this time those participating were far more dangerous.

The elevator doors opened and Hikaru stepped out and looked around. As he did so he spotted a familiar mustached man rising from his seat and begin to move towards him. "Shindo, I was hoping to catch you."

Smiling weakly, Hikaru groaned inwardly and replied, "Good morning Mr. Amano."

"I was hoping to discuss a few things with you, being that you made it into the Kisei League and all. Would you mind giving me a few minutes?"

Not wanting his focus distracted, as it was hardly firm anyway, Hikaru sighed then answered, "Perhaps after my game today? I'd really like to get to the match room."

Smiling and nodding, Amano replied, "Of course Shindo. I understand. After the match then."

"Thank you." Moving into the lobby more on his way to order in lunch, something he was doing more and more these days since he didn't have the opportunity to spend time with his friends at lunch on Thursdays, Hikaru noticed that the eyes of the others in the room were watching him. It had occurred the day before as well when he'd played his first Meijin Tournament match, and now again today with the higher Dans.

It was questionable whether the sudden interest that the other players had in him was due to the fact that Amano's article had finally come out or if it was due to his making it into the Kisei League. The article had been pretty much what he had expected, although it had focused far more on Hikaru than it had Akira. Discussing his quick rise up into the pro ranks, comparing him to Kurata at times, it discussed heavily the rivalry shared between Akira and Hikaru. He had concluded it by pointing out that not only had both he and Akira made it into the Kisei League, but that they were scheduled to play at the end of it as well. Part of him even wondered if the Association had gotten wind of the rivalry and rigged the match to be that way in the first place. The group and player pairings were supposed to be random, but then Hikaru also understood that the Japanese Go Association only existed due to sponsors, and flaunting a young rivalry like the one he had with Akira was a good way to catch the interest of potential sponsors. Even Amano's title to the article seemed to suggest that, **Eternal Rivals: The 21st Century's Elite Stars?** It certainly sounded impressive.

Of course not all of the pro players paid much attention to anything but strength shown on the board, and making it into the Kisei League the way he had was certainly one way to catch everyone's attention. His game against Hagiwara had been shown, and even analyzed in a side column by some pro player he didn't recognize, and he had certainly made Hikaru sound like a genius at times. If only they knew that Sai was the true genius, he was nothing in comparison. One day though, he might well be, but not now. The more likely reason for all the glances though came from a combination of the two, not that it really mattered to Hikaru at this moment, he had other things to worry about.

Ordering his lunch, Hikaru moved towards the game board to see where his match was scheduled to be played, and finding it moved off in that direction, stopping to take off his shoes. Over the last week and a half he'd started to receive an unusual amount of phone calls from the Go Association with requests by customers asking for him to play teaching games, lecture at Go events, one even asking him to do a commentary at a televised Go match. Was this what Akira had to endure as well, this sort of attention? He'd declined them all, and informed the Go Association that he would be busy until August 20th, and they had agreed to leave him be until that time.

As he placed his shoes on the shelf, Hikaru heard a voice from behind him call out, "Hey Shindo!"

Turning towards the voice, Hikaru smiled as Saeki made his way over, slipping out of his own shoes as he did so. "So today's the day huh? How are you feeling?"

Taking a deep breath and exhaling, Hikaru replied, "All right I guess, a little nervous. This will be my first official game against a titleholder."

Chuckling at that, Saeki responded, "No kidding. I wish I had some advice for you, but honestly I've never made it into a League or anything before so I have no idea what it will be like. Kuwabara may be old, but he's no pushover. Still it's not like I have it much better off today."

Cocking his eyebrow, Hikaru then said, "Why? Who are you playing today?"

Frowning at the thought, Saeki replied, "I'm playing Toya in the 1st Round of the Tengen 2nd Preliminary. I'm gonna have to give it my best if I want to win."

Nodding, Hikaru added, "Yeah, you and me both." Giving one more look, Hikaru then took his leave of Saeki and began making his way back towards the game room. So Akira was here as well. Unlike the last time though, he would have his own game and thus not be present to watch him play today. Honestly, Hikaru was not really sure how he felt about that. On the one hand, he really didn't need to feel the added pressure of his rival watching him, and after losing his Judan match against Morishita three weeks ago Akira really didn't need distractions today either lest he be knocked out of two tournaments inside a month. Yet at the same time it had been Akira's presence during the Final Kisei Prelim match that had pushed him to fight on at times, and this time it would be absent. _Could I win without that?_ Well either way, he'd just have to persevere without Akira present.

###

As he entered the game room Hikaru discovered that his opponent had already arrived. With a devilish smile across his lips, Kuwabara lifted his arm in greeting and boisterously called out, "Well Shindo, how nice of you to come. How are you today? Sleep well? Kids your age need their rest after all."

Nodding with a slight smile of his own as his mind began to shift slightly into game mode, Hikaru answered, "Good Morning Kuwabara-sensei. I did sleep well last night. I hope the same can be said for you. My grandfather says old men need their sleep too."

Cackling at Hikaru's remark, Kuwabara eyed him with a grin as Hikaru took his seat on the chair cushion and replied, "Ha, that's the spirit kid. I had a feeling about you ever since I first saw you. Now here you sit, Toya's rival. You must be enjoying that publicity huh?"

Adjusting himself in the strange chair, basically a floor cushion with a back and an armrest to one side, Hikaru stared down at the empty board. "Not really. I didn't decide to walk this path for fame after all."

Nodding knowingly, Kuwabara continued, "Yes yes, of course. You did it to face Toya right? Well I must say that I've been looking forward to witnessing your true potential for some time, and that's why I'm not surprised in the least that you've made it here to the Kisei League."

Cocking an eyebrow at this statement, Hikaru replied, "Are you saying that you expected me to make it this far?"

Cackling again, Kuwabara answered, "No, not expected. Let's just say that I had a _feeling_ that you could make it here if you really put out the effort. Once your rival made it in though I was fairly certain you'd follow him here. Ogata's been talking about the new wave that you and Toya are now making for some time, even before you got here. To tell you the truth though, I'm rather disappointed." Brushing a hair out of his face Kuwabara leaned a little closer to his opponent and grinning finished, "You see, I had hoped our first meeting like this would be in the Honinbo Finals."

Shock slid across Hikaru's face at those words. Kuwabara had expected to face him first in the Honinbo Finals? What sort of warped thinking was that? To think that he would not just get into the Honinbo League, but win it before arriving into any of the other tournaments that the two might appear in. Or was it merely a ploy to distract him? Kurata had once mentioned that while Kuwabara acted confident he was actually desperate, trying any trick or mind game to gain an advantage. That must be what he was doing here. But then again, if it was true…

"You know, a young energetic kid like you should get out and exercise more. Next time I go golfing you should caddy for me. How about it?" As he continued to speak Kuwabara watched the boy before him with great interest. It was true that he had been keeping an eye on him for some time now, and though many others had failed to see it, let alone acknowledge it until recently, this kid's strength was largely untapped. While it was true that the boy had risen quickly into the pro world after he first learned to play, Amano's article having filled in many of the gaps from Akira Toya's story of a year ago, it was hard to believe that he could have tapped into all that talent so quickly. That only left one answer, that this boy, despite the talent he currently showed, was still a budding flower, a cherry blossom that had yet to reach full bloom. Truly, it was likely that his potential talent was greater than his current talent.

And against all that potential talent and skill here he sat before him, ready to do battle with the young lion who was growing with every move he made. Just looking at him now it was easy to think that his calm demeanor and small frame made him weak before the holder of the Honinbo title, but Kuwabara was not so naïve. He could feel it, hidden beneath the surface, the intensity and anticipation of this game seething through the boy, waiting to be unleashed. It made the hair on the back of his hand stand on end, and he couldn't wait to see what the boy could do.

The game recorder entered the room now along with the timekeeper and made their way over to the table off on the side. A minute later two more people appeared at the door and Serizawa 9 – Dan and Hatanaka Meijin made their way into the room. Even though Hikaru was not in their group, if what they had heard and read about him were true, it was a good idea to observe Akira Toya's rival with care and see how he measured up. An opponent like Kuwabara Honinbo ought to be a good way to measure him.

At last the buzzer sounded and each player removed the tops of their go bowl and reached for their stones. Taking a deep breath Hikaru dropped two black stones onto the board. As he did so numerous white stones sprinkled onto the board. Counting the stones out, there were ten, twelve, fourteen, sixteen white stones. So he would go first.

Glancing at his hand, Hikaru's brow furrowed for a moment. He had felt the difference in the stones. These were slate stones; only once before had he played a game with such quality stones, and that was in the Yugen no Ma. It certainly spoke to the level of this game. Placing the stones back into the mulberry go bowls Hikaru lowered his head and as Kuwabara mimicked the same they both said, "Onegaishimasu."

As they raised their heads Kuwabara gazed up into his opponent's eyes and saw that the calm, small child was gone. Those hellfire eyes burned with a heat that he had seen so often before. Yes, this was what he had been waiting for, ever since Ogata had suggested a new wave was coming. A chance to take on that wave, to show them the strength of those that had come before, so that they might burn it into their minds as surely as Hikaru's very soul now burned. _Show me what you can do boy._

Taking a stone in hand, Hikaru placed it down at the 3-4 point in the upper right corner. This was the opening he favored most, and he needed to feel as comfortable as possible just now.

KA-CHI!

The timekeeper jumped as Kuwabara smacked the stone down on the board with an unusually great force. Hikaru though had not moved at all, his face stoic and calm. He had been expecting something like that, and he was not about to fall for such an obvious trick.

Ka-chi.

More interesting though was that for the most part, Hikaru had shown no sign of being intimidated by his ploys, or by the fact that he was playing a titleholder. He had played Koyo Toya in the Shinshodan match, but this match was different, the pressure to succeed higher. Almost all the other young pros he had played, especially in the Shinshodan matches, were quite intimidated and nervous even before he started putting pressure on them, yet this boy seemed to be as calm as if he were playing a game with a friend. This would be an interesting game. Continuing to ponder the board, Kuwabara suddenly heard a noise.

Ton. Ton.

Hikaru had begun to tap his Go bowl with his fan. Looking up at Hikaru, Kuwabara grinned inwardly. So he wasn't the only person who was willing to try and play mind games. _Cheeky kid. Still, it's a good response._ Taking a stone in hand, Kuwabara then placed his stone down in his upper right corner at 3-4 and leaned back in his chair. Yes, this was going to be an interesting game indeed.


	15. Shindou vs the Honinbou II

Ka-chi.

As Kuwabara's fingers left the stone, the observers in the room let out silent gasps. It was a well played move, and quite deeply thought out. It was too bad that it couldn't save him that corner, although it would minimize the territory Hikaru would eventually create there.

The buzzer sounded, yet as the game clocks were stopped both players remained motionless, studying the board as if nothing had happened. Eyes moved this way and that, examining each stone, the shapes and even the placement. Then at last Kuwabara rose from his seat followed in kind moments later by Hikaru. Stretching, Hikaru then walked out the door in silence, his fan held tightly in his grip.

Standing from their seats as well now, Serizawa and Nogi moved over toward the board and stared down at it. A few moments later they were joined by Hatanaka who studied the board with some concern. _Shindo did well not to jump in there. Most young players would have charged in and not seen the trap until it was too late. Still, something about his position seems…off._

Serizawa meanwhile turned from the board along with Nogi and commented to the older titleholder, "It's still early, but maybe Shindo isn't as big a threat as we thought."

Catching the comment as he had reached the door, Kuwabara turned back and chuckling casually responded, "Think that all you want Serizawa. That boy hasn't shown his full strength in this game yet. I would have thought someone like you could have seen that."

Cocking an eyebrow, Serizawa replied, "What do you mean?"

"The kid's unsure, hesitant, playing cautiously. Like he's trying to figure something out. He's not playing to his strengths. Eventually he'll figure it out though and then the real game will begin."

Watching the Honinbo carefully, the three Kisei League members found themselves rather taken aback. Here was Kuwabara Honinbo, the wily veteran player who always talked about the younger players as if they were children who needed to be taught a lesson, even put in their place at times, complimenting a fifteen year old 2 – Dan and saying that his full strength hadn't yet appeared in this game? It was unthinkable, and yet here he was, saying just that. As if reading their thoughts, Kuwabara continued, "Don't worry though. I haven't shown my true strength in this game yet either." Cackling, he then added, "Should be an interesting second half huh?"

###

Despite having ordered lunches like these many times before, Hikaru and Saeki were having trouble eating them this time. Instead their minds were on their respective games. "I tell you Shindo, Touya is persistent. He won't let up, and then I played a stone a little too timidly and he jumped on it. It's going to be difficult to hang in there."

Nodding, Hikaru took a sip from his drink and replied, "Well, that's Touya for you."

As Saeki continued to describe to him the match against Akira, Hikaru found himself listening halfheartedly, his thoughts elsewhere. There was a nagging feeling in his gut now, the kind he would get when he and Nase were reviewing a game and a stone seemed out of place. It just seemed to be eluding him, as though the answer was so obvious that it was on the tip of his brain. It was quite vexing.

Noticing the frustration on Hikaru's face Saeki paused then said, "Hey Shindou, are you all right? Something going on in your game that's got you bothered?"

Sighing, Hikaru answered, "I don't know, it just seems that something's off in it is all."

His curiosity piqued by those words, Saeki replied, "Off? What do you mean? I know that Kuwabara-sensei is strong and all but-"

"That's just it though," Hikaru interjected, "I can't tell if Kuwabara-sensei is weaker than I thought he'd be or if he's _extremely_ dangerous. I've always been able to figure it out before, but with him… I don't know. That's not all of it either. The way the game is being played out just seems wrong, like something's missing."

"Like what?"

Shaking his head, Hikaru answered, "I don't know. I've been making moves to secure the corner and then he played a tenuki and let me have the corner. I've been taking my time and watching out for his traps. Not too long ago I might have rushed right into a few of the traps he set, but this time I played it more cautiously. The way the game started out, with psyche out tactics and everything, I thought it'd be a hard hitting slugfest, but we both seem to be dancing around, unwilling to engage."

Exhaling, Saeki replied, "Wow, you must be really focused today. I mean from the sound of it you haven't even attacked yet, and that's like unheard of for you. I guess even you have to play more territory oriented games against someone like Kuwabara Honinbo."

At those words Hikaru's eyes widened as realization hit him like an oncoming train. He hadn't been attacking, or even making pushes in this game. Saeki was right, it wasn't just uncharacteristic, but rather it was completely against his own playing style. His moves felt forced, strange, because they were defensive, cautionary. More importantly though, there wasn't that fire behind his moves, that passion that he carried as he would dive in to take the jugular. He was playing scared, timid, just as he once had against Sai when he had begun to see the tip of the blade. Sai had told him that those fears transferred into his games, and so they had once more.

Sai was no longer around to give him courage, to remind him to channel that fear. This was his first game against someone of this level, Sai having played all of those games previously. Never had he personally faced a titleholder, and his fear was beginning to eat away at him. That would have to change. Epiphany came on top of epiphany as the tenuki and all the other moves like it came into focus. Kuwabara had realized this; he had felt the caution in his game and so had begun setting up for the end. He had to attack once play resumed, but with that stone there, and that one too, it was going to be difficult. He was going to have to thread the needle if he wished to survive this ordeal.

###

Now this was more like what the Honinbou had been expecting. The game had picked up since the lunch break, and Hikaru had come right out with an attack on his shape in the lower left corner. Not only that, but the fire that he had seen glimpses of in the opening of the game was now back in full force, and Kuwabara was finally beginning to feel Hikaru's push. Despite the stakes, Kuwabara couldn't help but grin inwardly at the Go that was now being played. His blood raced and churned, and the atmosphere was tense. This was what he lived for.

Too bad that the recent attacks weren't going to be enough.

Ka-chi.

Pausing as Hikaru's finger left the stone, Kuwabara stared down at the board suspiciously. That was certainly a strange move. He'd just have to wait and see what this kid did next.

He did not have to wait long as Hikaru's next move came down fast and hard with the torches in his eyes burning bright. He had obviously been waiting for it. As his finger left the stone Kuwabara stifled a chuckle. So that was the kid's plan, to attack from there. He had to admit, the strategy was quite impressive, but sadly, Hikaru should have played that cut on the next move. It would have been harder for Kuwabara to see as well as counter. That mistake would cost the boy dearly.

Ka-chi.

There, that stone ought to throw a kink in his plans. He'd have to play it carefully, but assuming it went as planned, the young upstart's lead would soon belong to the Honinbo.

Ka-chi.

Ka-chi.

Once more Kuwabara found himself staring at a stone that made no immediate sense. The game had progressed as expected after he'd taken the lead, and the lead had remained steady since then. Still the game was far from over, and this new move of Hikaru's seemed to stand there defiantly in an attempt to remind him of that.

Rubbing his chin, Kuwabara examined the board once more, reading deeper and deeper into the position. Then he saw it. Once again Hikaru had come up with an intriguing ploy to take back control, but now that he saw it, there was little hope. While he would be unable to capture that floating group now, he could cut it off from the position he was looking for, and that would suffice.

Ka-chi.

Ka-chi. Ka-chi.

Ka-chi.

Ka-chi.

Blinking at the last move, Kuwabara found himself intrigued. The boy had taken much longer on that last move, thinking it through critically and then played a tenuki instead of solidifying his group's position. Had he not realized the danger in leaving it open, did he think he'd have time to protect it on the next move, or was he just being reckless? He'd certainly had time to think it over, and yet this was the move he'd come up with. Well there were certainly many possibilities in this game, but at this level no opening was allowed to go without being exploited to its maximum. This was a lesson he'd have to learn, and Kuwabara was quite willing to teach it to him.

Ka-chi.

By this point the number of observers had increased, as Akira Toya had joined the group of Kisei League members now watching, and had just finished glancing over the game record. The beginning had been unlike Hikaru, that much was certain, but he'd come around midway through the match. Perhaps it had been first game jitters, or something else, but what mattered was that Hikaru needed something amazing now if he wanted to win this match. He needed something… Sai-like.

Unfortunately, as Hikaru played his next move, Akira didn't think that was going to happen. The game was getting into the later stages now, and there would soon be little room for Hikaru to mount a comeback. It had been an impressive game, no question about it, but his most recent mistake was going to cost him too much. Once Kuwabara captured that group it was over, and Hikaru had to know it. Sighing as Kuwabara played another stone, Akira lowered his head as an ache began to form in his chest, dread of the reality of it all sinking in. Hikaru was going to lose.

Ka-chi.

An audible gasp broke the silence of the room, causing Akira to lift his head up as a new and different energy began coursing through the room. As his eyes caught the board, Hikaru's fingers drifting back away from his stone, Akira froze, his face going white. That move… it was… it was just like the move Sai had played against his father. Images of that fateful game rushed to the forefront of Akira's mind, and his eyes widened. Yes, it was so much like it. Not the same obviously, and the circumstances in this game were different as well, but the two moves did seem to resemble one another, especially in their effect on the center of the board.

Before, Akira had been sure that the center would go to Kuwabara, but now, with that one stone, the center that had been Kuwabara's was now anyone's to take. That single black stone, just sitting there, it was nearly impossible but take if Hikaru played it right. More importantly though, while it seemed like a desperate and courageous ploy at first, once played it was…

Moving his eyes off towards his rival, Akira gazed at him with intense focus and admiration. It was no longer hopeless. Hikaru had found his Sai-like move. _Hikaru, just who are you? Why do I see Sai in you right now? Until when do I have to wait for the truth?_

Staring down at the board, Kuwabara felt the beginnings of a sweat drop forming across his forehead. What an unexpected and completely brilliant move. While some might have questioned if a boy of his level would have even realized what he'd done, Kuwabara was not fooled. This was the reason that the boy had not protected that group, so that he could set up and break the sente that Kuwabara had been pushing for some time now. He'd have to respond to this stone now, or else he'd lose the center before he could finish capturing that group.

That move though, it had seemed so well placed, so perfect in its position once on the board. He hadn't seen it at all, and it would likely cost him if he wasn't careful… and a little lucky too.

Ka-chi. Ka-chi.

Ka-chi. Ka-chi.

So the boy had already seen through this little battle, his moves were coming right on top of Kuwabara's own. There were no mistakes in his moves, each placed with astounding insight. Yes, this was the hidden talent he'd been searching for. Scanning the board, he also realized that the game was now even.

Ton. Ton.

Glancing up at Hikaru, Kuwabara gave an amused grunt. The boy was sitting there, face calm and stoic, yet there it was in his eyes, that burning fire, an intensity that would have likely reduced lesser players to mere cinders. He was not a mere player however, and even if he had to admire this play, he would not give in so quickly.

Ka-chi. Ka-chi.

Ka-chi. Ka-chi.

Glancing up from the board once more, Kuwabara held in a chuckle as he saw that Hikaru had now opened his fan up, covering all his face save his eyes that were scanning across the board now with sensational vigor. This wasn't vanity though, not from those eyes. Was he trying to distract him from something then, something that could be dangerous? Returning his eyes to the board, Kuwabara searched along the lines, instantly calculating and recalculating the shapes and positions, points gained and lost. Well, if it was there, he didn't see it.

Returning his eyes now to that one stone, the stone that had turned this game on him, Kuwabara grinned. For one move, this kid had surpassed him, and today, that was all he needed to pull the game from the pits of despair. His moves since then had merely been an extension of that first brilliant ploy, matching Kuwabara's moves in an attempt to secure the board. For one move that hidden talent had appeared before him, and it was as satisfying as he'd hoped. As he flexed his long fingers, Kuwabara felt the tingle still lingering in them, the feeling gained from facing true genius, even if it was only for a single move.

It was clear that Hikaru had seen through to the end of this game; his mind calculating just like his rival's did, with the speed and accuracy of a high Dan. All that remained was to see if the kid had made up the difference, and if the end game would let him hold it. Recalculating now, Kuwabara began chuckling lightly under his breath as the drop of sweat slid down his cheek.

Sitting across the room next to the scorer's table, Nogi Tengen watched on with sweat dripping from his face. That attack, it had been so well-timed, so… beautiful. It only worked if it was commenced at just the right time, and if the opponent saw it coming it would have failed, but once sprung the game would change. Nogi hadn't seen the move, neither had Kuwabara. It was plainly clear from everyone's reaction that only one person in this room had been able to see it, and with a slight shiver running up his spine, Nogi watched as that boy played his next move, and it was certainly powerful. _All that Kuwabara can do now is…_

"I resign."

At the sound of those words a silence spread around Hikaru's ears, and he found himself feeling slightly light-headed. It was like being in a dream, one that he was sure would end any moment now leaving him with the dull weight of disappointment and depressing cynicism that a return to reality from the joys of slumber always seemed to bring. Or at least, whenever it was a good dream anyway. He had won, defeated the holder of the Honinbo Title in his first Kisei League match. As his heart rose up, swelling with delight at what had just occurred the last doubts of dreaming left him, leaving behind only Hikaru basking in the pure ecstasy of the moment.

As the exuberance and burning jubilation of victory reached the summit of Hikaru's being he turned his head and his eyes came to meet and hold on his rival, who was eyeing him with a peculiar focus. It was that move, the one he had played, that had caused it. During the game, all hope had seemed to disappear and his mind had been ready to concede. His heart and gut though had refused to allow it, stabbing his consciousness with the idea that there was a way, a way that he knew Sai would have seen. It had been quite some time since he'd used the tactic, to place himself in his opponent's place and mind and imagining his teacher's coy smile before pointing to the one spot on the board that, despite all logic, would steal the game away. A move closer to the Divine Move than anything Hikaru could reach for himself.

That had been how he'd found that move, and Akira had recognized it as being Sai's as only Akira could. No one else had played against Sai and himself the way Akira had, shown the depth of understanding and the stubbornness to search for an answer that was too unbelievable to fathom. Yet he had come closer than any other living soul to discovering that truth, even as the absurdity of it tormented his mind, and that was how Akira knew that move. The two continued their gaze, faces calm and void of thought or emotion, yet eyes speaking volumes, not of intensity, but of comprehension and understanding. The rest of the room mattered not, was of a different time and place for them, a fleeting thought from a world long gone. Words were not needed here, their eyes said it all, acting as visual oratory to their little tale of cognizance. Finally their gaze broke and the world around them returned after both a moment and an eternity of absence.

###

The other people in the room had begun to surround the board now, eager to discuss the game. As they did so Hikaru turned his gaze forward looking across at his opponent who was beginning to chuckle lightly to himself. Finally he returned the gaze and said, "Well, wasn't that an interesting turn of events. I look forward to our next game kid. You'll find me a far greater challenge when it's my own title you're coming after. I'll be waiting for you, so don't disappoint this old man now. Oh, and one more thing. You can caddy for me anytime."

With that Kuwabara rose to his feet and, cackling to himself, began moving off. Yes, the next time would be far more interesting. For the longest time the newcomers had not been impressive at all. Even players like Kurata, Hatanaka and Serizawa weren't what he had once faced. Sure they might win a title here and there, but holding onto that title, no they weren't there yet.

One day he too would fall to one of these younger players, it was a fact as inevitable as the coming of the dawn. Life after all was merely a series of moments stitched together on the flowing currents that was the river of time. His reign as Honinbo was one such moment, glorious in its beauty and fulfillment, but time, as it always did, would pass by and the moment would be gone, fading into memory as the next moment and the next Honinbo arrived to replace it. That was fine of course. After all, no one could stay on top forever; sooner or later the next generation would arrive to claim its own glory, its own little place on the long, never-ending path that was Go. It had happened countless times before him, and would happen countless more after he was gone. It was the Way of the Go player, and for him personally, it was his Way of the Honinbo. Whether it happened next year or the year after that, or the year after that, he would be succeeded by one of these up and coming stars. When that happened though, he wanted to make sure that it was to the right star, to someone capable of holding onto the legacy he was leaving behind as a Honinbo. Someone who could see it as it truly was, not as a mere title, but as a way of living.

That boy, Hikaru Shindo, he might just be such a star. Of course he still had a lot to prove before that fact was certain, but there were two things Kuwabara did know. No matter who or what, he would not surrender his title easily, even if it were to one such as Hikaru; that it would have to be ripped from his fingers against all his effort and will to the contrary. That, and it would be quite fun to see it happen.


	16. Chapter 16

"So you're finally playing your first Meijin match tomorrow Honda?"

Taking a sip from his drink, Honda replied, "Yeah, against Toyama 2 – Dan. It does seem like it's been forever since I told you guys."

Chuckling, Hikaru responded, "It just seems like it's been forever because you're not playing that much. You only have your Dan games and the Meijin right now. It'll pick up eventually though."

Frowning, Honda shot back, "Easy for you to say. You've got the Honinbo, Meijin, and Tengen tournaments Shindo, not to mention the Kisei League."

Waya inquired, "Hey Shindo, don't you have a game tomorrow too?"

Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, my Honinbo 2nd Prelim against Yoshinaga 4 – Dan. Honestly though, I'm more interested in my game on Thursday."

Cocking an eyebrow, Honda responded, "Which game is that? Can't be another Kisei game already can it?"

Hikaru shook his head. "No, it's my 1st Round match in the Tengen 2nd Prelim against Matsunaga 6 – Dan."

Frowning himself now, Waya responded, "Come on Shindo, couldn't you at least give the lower Dan matches a little thought? I suppose it's nothing like playing Kuwabara-sensei in the Kisei League, but still. There's got to be some challenges for you amongst the lower Dans."

Honda chimed in, "so we're all playing tomorrow huh?"

Hikaru nodded and added, "Touya is playing tomorrow too. If he wins he'll be a 4 – Dan then." Then looking over to Waya Hikaru said, "Hey Waya, isn't Saeki really close to making 5 – Dan too? I thought I heard him say something like that the other day."

Waya nodded. "Yeah, he just needs to win a couple more. He'd better do it this year too, you too Honda, or else it will get much harder to go up in rank."

Cocking an eyebrow as he took a sip from his drink, Hikaru responded, "Why do you say that?"

Taking a sip from his own drink now, Waya then answered, "Because they're changing the rules next year."

Their eyes widening, Honda and Hikaru stared at Waya in shock. Hikaru then got out, "What…why?"

"It's only a rumor right now," Waya replied, "but apparently they're talking about getting rid of the Oteai since it costs a lot of money to play them. It's not sponsored like the other tournaments are after all. Not to mention that players like you Shindo can make it up to the Kisei League as a 2 – Dan."

"Then how will they promote people in rank?"

Waya shrugged. "I don't know exactly, probably based on our records in other tournaments though. I just know what Sensei told me after all, but he said there might be a few other ways to get promoted other than through winning lots of games."

"Like what?" Honda inquired.

"Not so sure of the details…maybe if you win a title or something. I just know that it's supposed to be harder to move up in rank is all. We'll just have to wait and see."

Turning to look out the window, Hikaru pondered this. Harder to move up in rank. He was only a 2 – Dan, and yet now he might have to stay that way even longer than before? Akira would at least be a 4 – Dan by that time, but him, he'd already been promoted this year. Might he have to stay at 2 – Dan for over a year, even longer maybe? Honda and Waya were in the same situation too. Reaching 5 – Dan meant not having to play in the 1st preliminaries of all the tournaments save the Kisei. If it'd be harder now to move out of 2 – Dan and Shodan ranks… then again for Waya, who had to take out Morishita's daughter after every promotion, it might actually be a good thing.

After some teasing from Waya, which included something about what boys and girls were supposed to do together, Hikaru had departed for home. Rounding a corner Hikaru continued down the sidewalk. Honestly it was beginning to get annoying, all the jokes about him and Nase. It was hard enough figuring out just why others couldn't let them be plain teacher and student as they really are. With all this extra stuff thrown in, it was just plain stupid. He'd just have to tell Waya that next time, and if Nase was there he was sure she'd want to do the same.


	17. Chapter 17

"Oh Shindo, there you are. Good to see that you made it."

Turning his head toward the sound of his name, Hikaru spotted one of the seminar directors motioning him over. He'd worked seminars for the Go Association before, and had been surprised by how many people of all ages could be drawn to one of these kinds of events. The Go Association certainly went all out for these events too, as there had to be twenty or more pros at the event acting in different capacities.

Reaching the director now, Hikaru took the sheet of paper that the director offered him and began to read it over as the director continued, "You'll be in Room 309 in the morning with Tajima and Ochi. After your lunch break, please try to make it to the auditorium on the 2nd Floor, they want everyone there a little early."

Nodding, Hikaru turned and made his way off towards the elevators. So they'd added more to his schedule than he had previously done in the past. The last two times he'd done an event like this he'd been there to do straight shidougo, but now it seemed they wanted to showcase him off a little bit more. He still had shidougo lessons scheduled for the morning, but now the afternoon had him scheduled to do commentary for a match between Ryoko Haruki 9 – Dan and… Kurata. Well that didn't sound so bad, he'd spent some time playing Kurata while preparing for the Hokuto Cup after all, and while Hikaru wasn't quite sure how serious either player would be taking this seminar game today, it still ought to be fun.

Scanning over the schedule some more as he stepped into the elevator, Hikaru noticed that Akira was also here. It looked like he was scheduled to do commentary for Ogata's match against Yoshirou Kamishi 9 – Dan tomorrow. Chuckling to himself, Hikaru began to wonder if having both of them doing commentary for the seminar had anything to do with that recent offer they'd received. The organizers of the NHK Cup had stopped by the Go Association building last Thursday asking if both he and Akira would be interested in acting as the analytical commentary for the televised tournament. Neither he nor Akira had been too fond of the idea, but the organizers had assured them that having two young players like themselves talking to the audience and television viewers, sharing thoughts and comments, would be good publicity and might draw more curiosity from the younger viewers.

Akira had voiced concern that normal people might not take Hikaru and himself seriously given their ages, and while he himself had not voiced it, Hikaru had wondered if it was a good idea at all for Akira and him to be sharing their thoughts on television. After all, if someone just looked at how many of their discussions at the Go salon had ended, it certainly was cause for alarm. It was possible though that either the organizers or the Go Association had not quite given up on the idea, and that this weekend was being used as an audition for the job that Hikaru suspected neither he nor Akira really wanted all that much.

Stepping out of the elevator now, Hikaru glanced down at his schedule again, checking his shidougo partners. Tajima 3 – Dan and Ochi 3 – Dan, just as the director had said. Coming to a halt, Hikaru blinked and looked again. Ochi… 3 – Dan. He hadn't heard that Ochi had made 3 – Dan, although given his winning streaks it wasn't exactly surprising. Ochi tended to win ten games or so in a row before losing a game or two, only to go on another streak. So Ochi was the first of their passing class to make 3 – Dan.

###

"And so Kurata-sensei has chosen to play there. As you can see this makes for a good push on the right side of the board. Wouldn't you agree Shindo?"

Nodding to Iwasaki 7 - Dan, Hikaru looked at the board with a slightly timid expression. Honestly he wouldn't have played there had he been the one making the move, not that Kurata's move wasn't good, but it just seemed to Hikaru that there were better moves. "Yes, it's a nice move, and a nice way to counter Haruki-sensei's play here. It's pretty clear given how she's playing that Haruki-sensei is trying to overpower and crush Kurata, but he's not backing down at all."

Smiling slightly as this was the longest comment by Hikaru yet during the match, Iwasaki pointed to the board and continued, "Yes, now it's likely that Kurata-sensei will try to move here next, so why don't we start playing it out to see what may occur."

A young female whom Hikaru did not recognize then stepped out holding several large magnetic stones and handed them to Iwasaki who gave a slight nod to her before returning his attention to the board and placing a stone. "So if Haruki-sensei plays here, then Kurata will make his move for this spot here and force here. Now this favors Kurata-sensei, so Har… ah yes, Haruki-sensei played here to prevent this advantage."

Nodding silently as Iwasaki continued to discuss the move, Hikaru sighed. This just didn't seem right to him at all. Commentating on a game like this with the players right next to them, even if it was only an exhibition game, really no different than any of the pick up games that he played at Akira's Go salon, seemed wrong. It seemed to him that it would have been better if it was set up like the Hokuto Cup had been, with the commentary in a separate room. Still, he did understand that with this not being a sponsored tournament with no real stakes, it was not necessary. Besides, the crowd seemed to really like seeing the players live rather than just their moves on a screen.

Klak.

Glancing over at the magnetic board now as the young lady placed the position of Kurata's reply, Hikaru's eyes almost shot out of his head. That move… it was bad in so many ways. Sure, Kurata might not be giving this game his all, but still, it was timid, weak. Glancing over at Iwasaki, Hikaru saw that he too seemed slightly nervous and shaken by the move.

Scratching the back of his neck, Iwasaki then continued, "Umm, yes… so Kurata-sensei played there. This is a forceful move and… well…" _Damn, I don't know what he was thinking on this move, but I don't want to upset Kurata, he might hurt me afterwards. How should I…_

"I think it's a pretty lame move. Sure, it seems like a strong reaction, but it doesn't leave flexibility." Iwasaki cringed as he looked to see Hikaru now standing next to the board gesturing to the move that Kurata had just played. Why, why had Hikaru chosen this moment to start commentating? Iwasaki had been trying for most of the match to get Hikaru to say more than just a few sentences, to take some of the work off himself, not to mention give Hikaru the opportunity to show off his knowledge. Yet he'd remained rather quiet, perhaps even a little nervous. It had been expected of course, Hikaru was just a kid still and had never done a live commentary like this. So _why_ had he chosen now to get over that timid, nervous start? Kurata was going to…

"Hey Shindo, what do you mean my move sucked?"

Iwasaki gulped. Somehow Kurata had gotten hold of a microphone and had turned around in his seat to question Hikaru. Was this some sort of gag? Perhaps one of those television reality shows that set people up in crazy situations to see how they'd react? Would that mean his family was watching him right now?

Hikaru meanwhile had turned to face Kurata, and even as Iwasaki seemed to be withering and shrinking away, Hikaru's energy began to rise. "I'm only speaking the truth Kurata. I could have made a better move than that without even taking the time to think."

"WHAT?"

Not backing down in the slightest, Hikaru continued, "Well look at the move. I mean I know you rely on intuition at times, but I guess your intuition's taking a day off."

As Kurata was about to respond, he heard the laughter from the crowd, and looking out at them, frowned and turned back in his seat. "Fine, I'll show you the power of Atsushi Kurata, just you watch Shindo." As he said this Haruki played her stone, and looking down at the board Kurata attempted to hide a gasp. _She'd…_

As if reading Kurata's thoughts, Hikaru said, "See, I told you so. Haruki-sensei has just capitalized on the mistake that Kurata used here. Now likely she'll continue to press here." Hikaru continued on as the crowd laughed some more. Soon the theatrics appeared to settle down, and Iwasaki breathed a sigh of relief. That had been scary, he had half expected some sort of altercation to occur for a minute. Well, at least Hikaru was talking now, and the crowd had seemed to find it all quite entertaining. Iwasaki glanced out at the crowd who were now listening to Hikaru quite intently as he began to describe Kurata's attempt to claw his way back, then returned his gaze to Hikaru. It took a certain kind of person to be able to talk that way to someone like Kurata. After all, Kurata's titleholder status was likely imminent, and in fact, depending on who you asked, even overdue. Yet Hikaru had no problem pointing out such a mistake as that. Then again, if what he'd seen and heard were true, this boy might not be that far off from a title of his own.

###

"So as you can see, playing the corner move here at 19-18 before making the atari is essential for black, otherwise white can live by creating an eye using the 19-18 point and survive. Are there any questions?" Pausing a moment and receiving none, Hikaru then continued, "Well then that's all for the lecture, I hope you all enjoyed it." Taking a slight bow, Hikaru then made his way off the small stage.

As he stepped down several members of the crowd who had been listening to his lecture moved over to talk to him. "That was wonderful Shindo-pro, you explained everything so well."

"Yes, I learned a lot from that lecture. It's hard to believe you're only fifteen."

"He may be fifteen, but Shindo-sensei is in the Kisei League after all. He even defeated Kuwabara Honinbo."

"Oh, that's true."

Chuckling slightly at all the fuss being made about him, Hikaru just smiled back at all of them. It really was strange to hear people talking about him in this way, just like he'd heard people talk about Akira for all those years. Still, it was kind of unnerving for some reason. Sure he was in the Kisei League, he'd even pulled out his game against Kuwabara, but some of their flattery was rather… excessive. After all, he wasn't the real genius, the true genius was no longer here to see the success he had gained.

"Thank you, all of you. I appreciate your support."

Another person chimed in, preventing Hikaru's escape. "Oh Shindo-sensei, I signed up for your shidougo lessons tomorrow."

At this, others began to comment as well. "Hey, maybe I should as well."

"Yeah, I mean we can get a chance to learn from the next Kisei."

"Hey Shindo-pro, can I have an autograph please?"

At those words, Hikaru froze. An autograph, someone wanted _his_ autograph? Turning around, he saw the middle-aged person in question holding out a paper fan. This was unreal. Now he had to deal with autograph requests, and he hadn't really won anything yet. He was turning into Kurata.

As if in answer to his thoughts, a voice rang out from behind the small congregation, "Wow Shindo, you're giving out autographs already? Beat old man Kuwabara and now you have a big head huh? Maybe you should wait until you beat me first."

As he heard the voice, Hikaru paled, and as the crowd parted Kurata came into view. Was he still mad about earlier? Before he could say anything, Kurata continued, "I'm sorry everyone, but I need to have a quick word with Shindo here. Could you please excuse us."

With that Kurata motioned for Hikaru to follow him, and complying the pair moved off over towards one of the lecture stands. Sliding behind the stand, Kurata turned to Hikaru and said, "Look Shindo, about earlier…"

Interjecting, Hikaru bowed and hastily blurted out, "I'm sorry about that Kurata. I just saw the move and it came out and I… I'm sorry."

"It's fine Shindo, and you were right about that move. I guess maybe I was taking today a bit easy, but you certainly got me fired up. Besides, the audience seemed to enjoy it." Kurata replied grinning.


	18. Chapter 18

_! Important: Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 18**

"WHAT KIND OF A MOVE DO YOU CALL THAT TOUYA?"

"I was lulling him, keeping him off balance!"

"Lulling him? Is that the new way to say you were losing? And you actually came back to win this?"

Frowning, Akira glared across the table at Hikaru and shot back, "Hey, after all the crappy games of yours that you brought here to show me do you really think you have the nerve to tell me _my_ comeback game is terrible?"

Raising his arms up as if to shrug, Hikaru snorted mockingly and replied, "Well if the truth hurts then fine, call that move what you want, but it was still a terrible move."

"IT WAS NOT TERRIBLE! It was to throw Ichiryu off-guard!"

"Well you say tomato…"

Jumping up to his feet at that remark, Akira leaned over the board and retorted, "I _dare_ you to say that again!"

"Fine, it was T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E."

"It was not! It was an off-guard move!"

"Terrible!"

"Off-guard!"

"Terrible!"

"Off-guard!"

"Terrible!"

By this point the Go Salon patrons, who had fled the scene not too long before were watching on with dismay. It was hard really to see their favorite young pro who had taught all of them so much over the years to be acting so… childlike. Hikaru was the cause of it, that much was obvious. Only when Hikaru came did this sort of thing ever happen. However though his presence may have caused it, Hikaru was not the sole source of these tantrums, and that only complicated the problem. Just as often Akira would be the one to engage, even instigate the quarrels, and the fact that Akira and Hikaru, despite their words, seemed to find some enjoyment out of these fights made it even more complicated.

One thing was fairly certain though, both players knew more about this game than the rest of the Go salon patrons combined. That, along with the rivalry that had only now been noticed by the Go world in general but had been known about here at the Go salon for far longer created truly awesome spectacles of matches when they weren't at each others' throats, like now.

"Oh yeah, well then what about this move here? Are you telling me that _this_ was also an 'off-guard' play?"

This was it. They'd hit critical mass, and depending on Akira's response they would now either cool down and return to their discussion or the argument would overload and one of them, likely Hikaru, would storm out the door. The only question was which would it be?

Glancing down at the board to where Hikaru had pointed, Akira replied, "That move well… yeah umm, that was a rather bad move wasn't it."

Nodding triumphantly, Hikaru now leaned over the board slightly and continued, "HA! It sure is. You'd have been better off going for a diagonal here."

Frowning, Akira added, "But that shape… it seems too flimsy. Wouldn't here be more stable?"

Shaking his head, replied as he returned to his chair, "No, playing there might be more stable, but it's too static. Your opponent will outflank you on your right side here and you'll be cut off."

"Hmmm, I still don't know, if they did go there then I could play here."

Chuckling to himself as Akira too now returned to his seat, Hikaru responded, "Ideas like that are what will get you knocked out of the Kisei League just like you got knocked out of the Honinbo League. You might have beaten the slumping Ichiryu playing Go like this, but this kind of Go won't be enough against Ogata."

Nodding, Akira then added, "True, Ogata-sensei is far more formidable at the moment, but what if the opponent responds to your move by going here? Then it doesn't go as you planned."

"No, I'd switch to playing here then."

"But then they can attach to here and you're in gote."

Frowning, Hikaru shot back, "Hey, I'm not saying it's perfect, and it is your game after all. I wouldn't have been in this situation to begin with."

Leaning back in his chair, Hikaru sighed as Akira sat back in his chair and observed the board. He'd come to take a look at Akira's game against Ichiryu since he had to play Ichiryu himself in three days time. He'd had to skip going to Akari's Go club, and she'd seemed disappointed by it too, a major turnaround from last time. Still, his recent popularity in the Go world made it hard to fit everyone into his schedule, and honestly Hikaru had begun to wonder how Akira had managed it. While it was true that Akira had gotten into Kaio, managing this much was difficult.

As he glanced from his seat over to Akira his rival's voice spoke up, "By the way Shindou, I looked on the Go Association site the other night and noticed that Nase had won her first eleven games."

"Twelve, she won yesterday too. She called last night to tell me."

"Twelve wins straight huh? Seems she's doing even better than you did. You only lasted what, nine straight before losing to some nobody?"

Frowning as he moved forward, bringing all four legs of his chair back to the floor, Hikaru countered, "Hey, I had a stomach ache that day!"

Chuckling at that, Akira shot back, "Heh, go ahead and make an excuse like that if you want. That way if Ichiryu beats you then you can just say you had a stomach ache right?"

"Hey, I don't need to hear that from the guy who took a loss on his _very first day_ of the Pro Exam!"

Eyes widening at that remark, Akira moved forward himself now and replied passionately, "Only because I didn't go that day! I won all my other games, and had I gone I would have won the first one too!"

Placing both hands behind his head Hikaru answered back, "Yeah, suuuuure, just make excuses. Missing the first day of the Pro Exam just so you could sit at home and play Go with… Sai." Exhaling silently as Akira eyed him suspiciously, Hikaru gave an inward sigh of relief. _Whew, that was close, I almost said that it was so he could play me. Good thing my mouth didn't go on auto-pilot there. Not like I lied, it was Sai's game after all._

"How did you know I was playing Sai that day?"

Suppressing his shock at the question, Hikaru just let out a light laugh while hoping it didn't sound nervous and answered, "Touya….I just know it….but could we please not talk about it now? I told you I'll tell you one day rememeber? I promise I will."

The light in Akira's eyes dimming slightly, he placed his fingers to his chin and then said, "I see…" He murmured, as if he was speaking with himself."Shindou…I can wait...So, what do you think? Will Nase pass the exam?"

"Hmmm." Giving the question a moment or two of thought while being grateful that Akira had returned to the previous subject, Hikaru then continued, "I don't know. Twelve wins is pretty good, and the games she's showed me in the three times we've met up since looked fairly impressive. Still, there's three other players besides Nase that are undefeated still and two with one loss each and all the games between them seem to happen in the second half."

Nodding, Akira added, "That's true. Anything could happen in the second half. It all depends on how mentally strong she is I guess."

Nodding, Hikaru then took a look up at the ceiling and replied, "Yeah…but I think she really has a chance. She's focused, sharp, like something is just driving her on. "

Leveling his vision back down to the board between them, Hikaru then glanced down at his watch. Eyes widening, Hikaru stood up and said "Whoa, it's this late already! I have to go, I have a teaching game tonight!"

Having lowered his own gaze down to Hikaru as his rival had stood to his feet, Akira then glanced at the wall clock and added, "Yes, it is rather late. I suppose I should be leaving as well." Rising calmly to his own feet now, Akira followed Hikaru off towards the exit. As the two made their way to the door, many of the patrons turned from their own games to watch. It was quite the rare sight, seeing both Hikaru and Akira leaving together. _No war today, huh_? In fact, it had never happened before.

###

Passing the front counter, Hikaru gave a short bow to Hirumi and thanked her before heading to the door. Stopping as he reached the door, Hikaru then turned around and waited as Akira made his way to the front counter as well, having stopped to grab his bag that carried his Korean and Chinese study materials. International tournaments would soon be upon him in his career, and Akira was determined to be as prepared as he could be. As he reached Hirumi, Akira stopped and smiling warmly said, "I'm sorry that we both have to leave so soon. I'll be back here tomorrow. Thank you for the tea."

Blushing deeply as Akira turned and moved towards the door to join Hikaru, Hirumi smiled back slightly dreamy-eyed at the young boy she'd watched grow up here over the years. And now here with his friend, playing games with a passion she had rarely seen from Akira. Everyone else at the salon seemed to think of Akira and Hikaru as opposites, completely different in personality and demeanor, yet Hirumi saw something else. Their exteriors might have been different, fundamentally opposing even, but down at the very core of who they were, both of those boys were exactly the same. Their hearts and souls resonated with the same passion and desires, and when looked at from that perspective, it was easy to see those two as true kindred spirits.

###

As they exited the building and turned to head off towards the train station Akira hesitated, then said, "Shindou… why did you take Nase on as your student?"

Shrugging slightly and keeping his gaze forward, Hikaru replied, "I don't know."

Akira's eyes flashed over to watch Hikaru out of the corner of his eye once more, sharp and focused. "What do you mean 'I don't know'? Surely you had a reason for taking her on."

"Not really, it just sort of happened. She came over to talk about her worries and she looked so sad and helpless. I wanted to help her. Nase… I really felt that she had the talent to go pro and I wanted her to. I remember she used to give me advice during the exam prelims, and it just seemed like now it was my turn to help her back. I guess I never really meant for her to become my student, I'm not even sure if that's what we are now really, but it just sort of happened."

Continuing to walk on in silence now, Akira contemplated this new revelation. While it had certainly been true that Nase had shown real strength in her game when he had played her, he also had to admit that she was not Hikaru. Having played many pick up games with his rival, Akira knew Hikaru's creative skill at finding new and unseen moves that seemed crazy until he actually played them. Nase hadn't shown that capacity to him, and while she could certainly learn to play that way she lacked the ability to do it naturally as Hikaru could.

Still, he had always assumed that Hikaru had seen some hidden talent, a strength that was not immediately apparent. Yet here he was now saying that even he didn't know the reason why. Pity, a desire to remove her sadness, these were both admirable traits, but a reason to take on a student? There was something else, something that had been nagging at the back of his brain the last minute or two.

Akira felt that he knew what it was, but he just refused to accept it. After all, Hikaru and Nase had been friends before they were teacher and student, and that had to be what he'd picked up on. There was that thought though, the nagging suspicion in the back of his mind that Akira actually found himself dreading. Could it be that his friend and rival actually… had feelings for his would-be student? Akira's heart sank at the thought.

It seemed unlikely, Hikaru had certainly never indicated even the slightest interest in such things. It was just as likely that subconsciously Hikaru had sensed something about Nase and acted upon it, for the love of the game. That was the true joy and ecstasy after all, acts done for the love of the game, for the mere sake of doing them. Hikaru and Akira were alike in that regard, they had one great love that surpassed all other things, the love for the game of Go.

Came back from his stream of thought, Akira looked up. "Will you come here tomorrow, too? Both of us could train more for the coming matches with Ogata, you know."

"Ohh…actually I'm overbooked for the next days. Lots of stuff, you know. Can't come, sorry Touya. See ya at the Institute some time then!"

"Oh, okay. Nevermind then. Bye, Shindou."

 _Stuff? What stuff?_ _What is more important than Go, Hikaru? What is more important than playing me, Hikaru?_

Akira sighed.


	19. Shindou vs Ichiryu

"Ok Mom, I'm off!"

"Take care Hikaru, and good luck today."

Stepping through the doorway of his house and breathing in the fresh morning air, Hikaru smiled and began to make his way up the walkway to the street. Today was the day, his second Kisei League match. His game against Kuwabara seemed so far away now, like a dream that faded in his memory as time moved ahead. All the moves played were still locked in his brain, the feel of the stones fresh on his fingers, but the thrill of the whole experience seemed to have left him. Perhaps that was how it was with all truly great games, or perhaps he'd remember the feeling once the League ended and it was all behind him.

That was fine, because at the moment Ichiryu was before him, not behind, and he had to stay focused. He'd seen Akira's game against Ichiryu in the Honinbo League, and after having Akira recreate his first Kisei League match against Ichiryu he had a fair idea of what to expect. Honestly he was surprised Akira had been able to come back from that match to win given the skill he knew Ichiryu had to possess. After all, he was the previous holder of the Kisei title, and had held it for several years. He was on the same level as Kuwabara and Koyo Toya, a true master of Go.

It was that fact that made Akira's comeback all the more surprising to him. Perhaps Waya had been right, that Ichiryu was in a slump that he seemed to be struggling to break. There had been times as an insei where Hikaru too had felt the pain and frustration that a slump caused. In those times he had sought just one win, anything to turn the tide and remove the pain of defeat. While it was true that Ichiryu was still winning games here and there, on the larger stages he appeared to be faltering in games where the pressure to succeed was the greatest.

Waya had been talking the other day as if this match would be far easier than his last one; that the slump would make Hikaru's victory all the simpler to accomplish. Such ideas though were far from Hikaru's own mind. The slump didn't make Ichiryu easier to defeat; it made him more dangerous. Hikaru paused a moment and closing his eyes took a deep breath. Exhaling, he then opened his eyes as he felt his mind beginning to focus, sharpening as if to become the very edge of a razor. This was not going to be easy.

###

Sitting patiently as he waited for the next move to be played, Waya stole a glance around the room. It was rather strange, seeing all these top pros sitting by watching. Well, maybe it wasn't so much the top pros sitting around watching a Kisei League match that was as strange as the two players playing in it were, or more precisely, the one.

Ka-Chi.

So that was Hikaru's move. Marking the move and time on the game record, Waya then glanced over at the only other person in the room whose intensity seemed anywhere near the two players. The newly minted Akira Toya 4 – Dan watched the game with a fervor in his eyes. Seeing Touya at Hikaru's matches was becoming routine nowadays. While it certainly reinforced the rivalry, Waya had a hard time figuring out why he would come to watch Hikaru play an opponent that he had already faced. Then again, perhaps it was to see how Hikaru would respond to the former Kisei.

Ka-Chi.

Interest in this game however had not just fallen to Akira, as both Serizawa 9 – Dan and Morishita had joined him. The latter had somewhat surprised Waya. While Hikaru may have been a part of Morishita's study group, it wasn't as if Morishita would come to his student's games to give support. That merely left the prospect that Morishita was also looking at Hikaru not as a student, but as a potential opponent he would need to better understand, despite all the time spent playing him in the study group. Hikaru had once mentioned that high level matches were different, an exotic and addictive drink that once tasted, would always be yearned for. So perhaps that was Morishita's reasoning, the need to watch Hikaru in true battle, not in some mock battle at a study group.

Ka-Chi.

Blinking, Waya moved to record the move. So now it began, a thrust like that was a clear attack on Ichiryu's position in the upper left corner. Taking another glance around the room, Waya's gaze paused on the only other observer at the match, Kosemura. It had seemed strange actually to Waya that Kosemura had been tapped to cover the match given Amano's familiarity with Hikaru and Akira. While this wasn't a direct match up between the two, it was a certain comparison between the two on how Hikaru would fare against Ichiryu given Ichiryu's previous loss to Akira. When Waya had inquired about it before the match though Kosemura had explained that he had been tapped as a back up given the chief's desire to have Amano cover the first match of the Meijin Finals that was currently being held at the Westin Nagoya Castle Hotel in Nagoya. Thus Amano would be unable to cover both matches, as the Meijin Title match would last two days.

Ka-Chi.

Now Hikaru was making an approach in an attempt to secure the right side of the board.

Ka-Chi.

Heh, so Hikaru was going to be persistent and continue the battle for control of the right side. It wasn't suicidal or anything, but it was likely he'd lose a point or two in the exchange. Yet as Akira watched, Hikaru continued to attack the side persistently. What was so important about that side that made Hikaru attack it so persistently? Already Ichiryu had taken several tenukis to begin securing central control along with an attack on Hikaru's stones there. Hikaru needed to respond, yet he seemed content to plug away at the right side.

This was not the Hikaru Akira knew, it was like watching him devolve into that same weak player from the Junior High Go Tournament. His fist tightening as he continued to watch, Akira struggled to maintain his composure and silence. It was infuriating, to see his rival, the person he respected so much as a Go player to use such… sloppy play. The game was still close of course, the pressing on the right side was earning him back points in the short term, but he'd soon lose any hope once Ichiryu secured the center.

It was true of course that defending against someone who relentlessly attacked, pushed in on positions like this, as if determined to take a stone, was quite frustrating. Still, without more finesse the attack would be less of a headache to a top pro and more of a slight irritation, one removed by the skill of the defense.

Ka-Chi.

There, so he finally was beginning to defend himself. What was wrong though? Could this be vanity, was Hikaru overconfident after beating Kuwabara and having seen his match against Ichiryu? No, Hikaru would not have given into such concepts, he had always played with a good sense of things, never rushing. Yet now…

Ka-Chi.

Akira blinked. That move, he'd seen something like it before, he knew it. Still, it was ill placed playing a diagonal there now, even if it would have been of benefit two moves ago. If Ichiryu was smart he'd take advantage of the weakness that Hikaru had given him, capture that stone and…

All at once Akira's eyes widened. It couldn't be, Hikaru would never try something like that. Yet still, it made sense now that he examined the board. But it would be ludicrous, impossible to pull off against such a seasoned pro, capable of reading ahead. Perhaps a lower Dan, one willing to jump in on a perceived wrong move might take that sort of bait, but not…

Ka-Chi.

Ichiryu had played for the capture, trying to gain the ponnuki. The center appeared to be going to him now, but that last move of Hikaru's, the stone was now… Memories flashed back into his mind, and moments later Akira was playing ahead, looking deeper into the game. Yes, it was there, assuming that Ichiryu didn't read ahead, the game dynamics would change. It wouldn't be enough to pull out a win outright, but it would make the game even. Of course if he played there first, forced Ichiryu to play there, then… Hikaru had it, but now he had to play flawlessly in the meantime to pull it off.

Ka-Chi.

There, that move was sharp, to the point, just like Hikaru. He was beginning to turn it up now. If he continued with moves like that, he'd be fine.

Ka-Chi.

As Ichiryu's stone hit the board the lunch buzzer sounded, calling an end to play for the time being. Rising from his seat, Ichiryu took one last glance down at the board, a smug, confident smile sliding across his face. This match, it felt good, and he was in position to take the victory, to make this the first match towards ending the slump that had been vexing him so much. Akira Toya might have been the bane to his game at the moment, but this boy was not as strong as Akira Toya. _Still too green, making mistakes that were befitting a lower Dan, not a member of this league. Kuwabara had been wrong, this boy was not someone he need watch as he had warned. It must have just been his old age and lack of commitment that had caused Kuwabara to fall to this young pro._

At last he too rose from his seat and with one last glance at the board turned towards the door. As he made his way to the exit, ever so briefly Hikaru's eyes turned to his rival, and seeing the coy grin on Akira's face, Hikaru smiled too. Well it was to be expected; Akira had the same creative vision that Hikaru possessed after all.

Watching as the other player exited the room, the rest of the group now moved over to the board to look at the game more closely. Waya, having finished organizing the game record for after lunch, quickly joined them. Serizawa was first to comment. "This game is progressing quicker than Shindo's match against Kuwabara did. It appears he's gotten over his nervousness. Still, I don't understand his thinking, like here for example."

Waya nodded. "Yeah, I was thinking that too. I might have tried doing that move myself in this game, but looking at it from the outside it doesn't appear as strong. Maybe he's still a little nervous?"

Kosemura then inquired, "Morishita-sensei, what do you think? Shindo is a member of your study group correct?"

Nodding at the question, Morishita remained quiet for a moment, as if searching for something hidden, and then answered, "It's possible. Shindo is only fifteen, so he might very well have gotten carried away here, but I don't think so. I have played him many times in my study group after all, and seen his games against my other students as well. In all of those games, I cannot remember one where he got carried away or neglected the rest of the board without reason. I am not entirely certain what he is thinking, but I do know that of all the young players I have known, Shindo's ability to read ahead in the game exceeds them all. In that at least, he is even stronger than me."

Mouth widening slightly, Kosemura responded, "Ohh, such great praise for someone so young. So Shindo may have a chance after all?" He then turned to scribble down the quote on his notepad.

Nodding his head, Serizawa then added, "Yes, Shindo certainly still has a chance. This game is far from over, but he does have an uphill battle to fight. I don't know if a young pro can do it, but we will find out shortly."

Nodding to this as he smiled coyly, Akira turned towards the door himself now and said, "Indeed. I believe that the rest of this match after lunch will be quite interesting." Taking one last look at the board, his eyes focusing on that one spot, that one move of Hikaru's, Akira chuckled softly to himself and then turned to leave.


	20. A bitter defeat

Ka-Chi.

There, soon he'd be able to invade that corner and capture the territory needed to gain victory. Hikaru seemed to be quieting down again, as if waiting for something to happen. Well, he'd just have to show him then.

Ka-Chi.

Thinking back to his conversation last Thursday with Kuwabara, Ichiryu couldn't help but laugh to himself. His words though on this boy, cryptic yet filled with warning. He'd spoken with conviction and ire, offering that he be on guard as his slumping ways might leave him vulnerable to this young player. Having laughed it off some, thanking his colleague for the sound advice, Kuwabara had said something truly strange. 'If you aren't careful to read ahead against that boy then you'll likely be dead by the time you see it coming.'

Ka-Chi.

Glancing up at his opponent for a moment, Ichiryi then returned his eyes to the board, hiding his face behind his fan. _Who had Kuwabara thought he was_? He was a former Kisei; of course he would read ahead. This boy, though talented in his own right, was not at the level to stay in this league long. Kuwabara must have been trying to get under his skin so that he wouldn't be the only player to lose to this boy.

Ka-Chi.

 _Heh, this would be easy enough._ It was a bit forceful, but he'd be able to build a pair of eyes with this shape. And now that Hikaru had allowed it he'd…

Ka-Chi.

Ichiryu had been reaching for his teacup when Hikaru's move came down. Having turned to take notice of the move, there was a sudden noise as the teacup dropped from Ichiryu's hand, his entire attention returned to the board. _A cut there?_ At first glance it hadn't made sense, but then he'd begun to read ahead and then… It just couldn't be possible. That had been a mistake, it had to be, and yet… the ponnuki, who gave their opponent a ponnuki in the center of the board like that just to…

Raising his eyes, anger filling his quickly reddening face, Ichiryu stared at his opponent whose eyes were scanning the board unconcerned, as if that move had been just like any other. But it hadn't been just any move. _Had he planned it from all the way back then?_ No, there was no way a boy this young, this green, could have seen this far ahead. That would be… exactly what Kuwabara had warned him about, that this boy could read ahead with amazing skill. No, it couldn't have been that, it had to be luck, or an opportunity gained only now. After all, that move would have required that he himself not see it coming, that he…

Gasping as his face reddened even deeper, Ichiryu's eyes returned to the board. It didn't seem possible, and yet it was right there in front of him. He'd been coaxed into thinking that his opponent was weak, led on only to be blindsided by this. Though it was a narrow one, Hikaru now held the lead. If he couldn't connect through the center then he'd need to form eye pairs to save them, or else the game would be over shortly. He'd have to focus now and change his plans for everything. _This was not going to be easy_.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

Watching the game progress, Akira knew it by now: he knew that Hikaru had all but caught up to him. All that really remained was for Hikaru to defeat him in battle, to overcome that last hurdle and stand next to him, side by side on the eternal road of Go that they both walked. _Hikaru!_

 _###_

Bursting out through the entrance to the game room and colliding with a hapless young pro who happened to be walking through the hallway at that moment, a furiously steaming bald figure clamored down the hallway, trying his best to avoid being seen by anyone else and failing poorly at it. As eyes turned to cast their gaze on the fast moving figure as he made a dash into the elevator, another figure emerged from the room.

Looking down the hallway where Ichiryu had run, Serizawa recalled another scene much like it. That scene had occurred after Ichiryu's first defeat at the hands of Akira Toya. The two games had been similar in that the difference in the game had been decided by a match of reading ahead. At that time Akira Toya had seen beyond Ichiryu, and today it had been Hikaru Shindo who had done it. It must have been difficult, falling at the hands of two young pros like that, back to back no less. Not to mention losing by two and a half points.


	21. Chapter 21

It was rather strange really, but Hikaru would have thought that now that he was a professional Go player that sitting here in the auditorium seats watching a professional match would not have seemed so… dull. Akari insisted on him coming with her to this hayago tournament, so he just didn't want to let her down.

Many of Japan's top players were actually not even in Japan at the moment, that's why event games these days were only between not-so-prominent 7- or 8-Dans. Kurata, Ogata, Nogi, and Morishita had all left on Friday for Korea. They were, after all, the only Japanese pros still representing Japan in the Samsung Cup. Yashiro, for a reason not known, was allowed to tag along to Soul. Anything would be more fascinating than _this_.

 _The new King of Japanes Go_ , Hikaru smirked. Ogata was currently playing in the Kisei League, challenging for the Meijin title, and next week the Honinbo League began. Adding in events like the Samsung Cup and it became hard to fathom how strong Ogata had to be to maintain his current level of play. Had Zama Oza not knocked him out of the Tengen Tournament last month it would have been even worse.

And then, Hikaru's thought wandered to Akira. By defeating Ookubo 9 – Dan in the Final Preliminary match, Akira had guaranteed himself something else, the rank of 7 – Dan next year. Even if he lost all seven of his Honinbo League matches, the League ran through April, and with the new rules taking effect April 1st, he'd be guaranteed the promotion. _Akira Toya 7 – Dan then!_ Hikaru chuckled slightly. Yes, 7 – Dan at least sounded like a rank that befits someone of Akira's skill, his genius. Whether or not it fit Hikaru as well was unknown, but Hikaru did know that on that day Akira's rank would finally reflect his skill.

In some ways, Hikaru even wondered if the instant promotion system had been set up just for Akira, a coronation for the young Go prodigy. Sure it allowed for ranks to better reflect a player's skill and would remove the number of 9 – Dan ranked players in the long run, but it just seemed that so many people in the Go world found it hard to think of someone as young and talented as Akira as a 3, now 4 – Dan. After all, Hikaru had never thought of Akira that way. In many ways rank meant nothing to him, even if he used it himself to judge the skill of those he'd play, at least on a scale of high Dan and low Dan. Taking a deep breath, Hikaru couldn't help but smile. _7-Dan, it sure has a nice sound to it._

"Hey Hikaru, are you paying attention?"

His mind springing back to attention at the whisper in his ear, Hikaru turned toward Akari and giving her a quick smile nodded. "Yeah, I'm paying attention."

Smiling back at him happily, Akari then whispered back, "Good, then can you explain to me why that last move was bad? The commentator isn't very easy to understand at times."

His eyes widening as he glanced over to the diagram board, Hikaru began to panic as he examined the position, trying to figure out where the last few stones had been placed. _Damn, if only it wasn't a hayago tournament._


	22. A hot Soul story

Ko Yong Ha did a little damage control on his hair, and headed downstairs the hotel hosting the Samsung Cup. He wandered back out into the hallway in search of more coffee and potentially lunch before the afternoon match. He stepped into the elevator and hit the ground floor button, but before the doors closed, someone shoved his arm in, causing the elevator to beep in annoyance and open again. The boy who entered was glaring bloody murder, and after a moment Yongha recalled who he is. He even bowed his head a little, because he has promised to his event manager to behave, after all, but the glaring didn't abate.

"You. You're the bastard who didn't think I was worth playing last time you were here."

Yongha feigned incomprehension, hoping this will make the nuisance go away. This tactic, however, fails spectacularly, as the youngJapanese pro simply took this as an invitation to vent.

"Personally, I don't think you're worth ANY of our time. And I hope Kurata-sensei kicks your ASS today, though I'd rather do it myself. "

"I'm sure it's easy to be brave when you think I don't understand you," Yongha told him in Korean.

The glare intensified, and he didn't need to speak perfect Japanese to understand the venom in the other's words when he responded, predictably, with: " What? Are you insulting me? You're totally insulting me. You think you're SO great, don't you? Man, you have hair like a GIRL, and look at you, you probably wear MASCARA or something, and-"

He went on in this vein for a few seconds more as the door closes, and really, Yongha thought, he's perfectly justified in shutting him up the simplest way he knew how.

What he didn't quite expect is that after the typical moment of shock, the little upstart decided to kiss him back, and is generally not fighting the idea of being pinned to the elevator wall. In fact, he really seem to be getting into it, and when the elevator dinged to a stop, Yongha was rather reluctant to step back. He did, though, running his tongue over his lower lip, thinking it would probably swell a little from the particularly enthusiastic bite it just received. The Japanese player was panting for breath and looking at him with wild eyes as the elevator door opened, so Yongha took the opportunity to tell him, " You talk too much," in Japanese which elicited no coherent response—proving that his little experiment was clearly a brilliant success. He wondered if it would work half so well on one of Shindou's rampages.

As he left the building and went into a nearby ramen stand he noted this morning, he realized that those fifteen or so seconds pretty much constituted a complete breaking of his promise not to provoke anyone before lunch. Fortunately, it wasn't as though anyone would ever know.

###

His game against that fat Japanese pro that afternoon was a very good one; still Yong Ha managed to win. Besides, he was having a hard time not laughing over the fact that one young member of Japanese team was giving him during the whole game.

"Thank you for the game," Kurata tried to speak in Korean.

"You don't have to bother, Kurata-sensei. The crazy bastard speaks Japanese." If looks could kill, Yongha thought, he would definitely be in danger right about now. In response, he only grinned.  
" Yashiro-kun!" exclaimed Kurata, "Language!"

"He's that bastard who insulted Shuusaku, don't you remember?"  
"One more Shuusaku fan, no? " Yong Ha replied demurely. "Or are there some other…fancy reasons that evoked you?" He sit up and turned on his heel to leave, while Yashiro—whose name he made a point to remember this time—was dragged spluttering out of the room by the other Japanese pro, who had turned an interesting shade of purple with rage.

###

There was a small banquet that night, hosted by the sponsor in a sad attempt to offer the chance to meet and size up a few of the high-level Japanese pros. Most of them had clearly forgotten how to enjoy themselves and have very little use for time not spent at the goban, much like their Korean counterparts, but Yong Ha did manage to make one interesting connection.

Ogata Seiji was the sort of man that Yongha had a great deal of experience leading around on an implicit leash. There was something a little sleazy about him at first glance, something a little suspicious in the pristine whiteness of his suit and the carefully aloof politeness of his smile. Yong Ha noted appreciation in his eyes when they were introduced and allowed a slow smile to come across his face, just a little taunting, feeling very comfortable with himself and the approving gaze which was skimming over all sorts of inappropriate places.

After observing for a few moments, Yong Ha gracefully approached the man and remarked, "Not much entertainmenthere. Ogata- sensei? "

"Ogata's fine. What did you expect, anyway?" Ogata told him. "Your Japanese is very good."

"I study hard," Yongha replied, deciding to forgo humility. „Clearly, I am wise that I do so. It would be a pity not to speaking with you, Ogata-san."

That was not the sort of thing a man like Ogata would normally responded to, but this trip would be far too long to spend in the hotel lounge talking to that fat Kurata and old Morishita. A flash of obvious desire burned in Ogata's eyes before his face became inscrutable once again. "You flatter me. The pleasure is mine. "

"Yes," Yongha said, suppressing a laugh, and returned Ogata's smile with one of his own. "I am excellent company. "

###

"Ogata-sensei, no one can have everything he wants, you know." Yongha remarked, sprawled bonelessly across the couch, contemplating whether he had the energy to get up and get himself a drink. It seem more trouble than it's worth even to brush away the lock of tousled hair that had settled across his eyes, so he decided to stay put.

"I have everything I could possibly want," came Ogata's amused voice from the direction of the kitchen. " An enviable career, an excellent car, properly tailored clothing, and you sprawled mostly naked on my sofa."

"I am flattered," Yongha told him cordially, which was rather funny considering his current position, but being rude with this man was mostly pointless. He's the type that genuinely had to care about something before he bothered getting angry, and Yong Ha was hardly naïve enough to think he belonged on the short list of things Ogata Seiji cared about. But he certainly knew what he did belong.

"Ogata-sensei. Tell me. How that Shindou brat's doing?"

Ogata shrugged, trying to surpress his surprise. "Why do you care? I thought you never acknowlegdeged his strength?"

"I never did, either."

"So why care?"

Yong Ha closed his eyes remaining silent. _Yes, why care anyway_? Doesn't he have everything he wants already? But still…those eyes…burning with hatred, with will to revenge, and with passion. Those eyes haunted him, much more than he'd like to realise.

"You can't have everything you want, you know."

"Very much the contrary, Ogata-sensei."

"Then, sadly, you're not as smart as you think you are."


	23. A Lunchbreak with the Meijin

Rising from his seat after cleaning up the Go stones, Akira Toya looked around the room, observing all the other people playing their games. There seemed to have been something of resurgence in the interest of Go amongst the public as of late, a good sign for the future of the game. After all, even though he was only starting his own road down this path, sooner or later there would have to be someone else for him to pass the torch onto, a new generation who found this ancient game as beautiful and fulfilling as he did.

As he moved to leave Akira spotted a pair of young pros heading towards the elevator. Checking the clock Akira saw that it was nearly one o'clock, time for the pro matches to resume. That was right, it was Wednesday, Hikaru would be playing in his Meijin 1st Preliminary match today. Perhaps he should stop by to take a quick look. Akira had played his 2nd Round Meijin a month ago at the beginning of September, defeating the then Ashiwara 4 – Dan with an ease that had seemed to depress his Go friend.

There had been something interesting about Hikaru's opponent for today, but he couldn't recall what. He'd only glanced at the name of his opponent for a moment in the Weekly Go listings earlier this week, rather assuming that the opponent wouldn't matter much. That had been when he'd paused to read the annotation that…

Akira stopped just shy of the elevator. That was right, Hikaru's opponent was from the Japanese Go Association's Central Branch, and the game had been scheduled to be played at the Central Branch… in Nagoya. It was a two-hour trip on the Shinkansen, assuming Hikaru didn't choose to stay the night at a hotel and come back on Thursday on the main railway system. Of course knowing Hikaru's distaste for hotel beds he'd likely fork out the 10,500 Yen to come back today. Yes, Hikaru would most certainly be coming home tonight since he'd want to be here for sure. Tomorrow was Akira's Kisei League game against Ogata, and there was no question in Akira's mind that Hikaru would want to see that. Hikaru would play Ogata after all in two weeks and thus would want to see him play someone of comparative skill. More importantly though, Akira knew his rival would be there because it's him who'd play.

As he made his way down the stairs, Akira began to reflect on his upcoming match. This would be his second time facing Ogata in an official match, the player he had played against more times than any other save his father. Last time he'd been dominated, unprepared for the battle before him. Back then Ogata had said that it had not been his nervousness or any intimidation that had caused the loss, but rather a difference in the level of skill between the two. _Akira, you are below me_. Those words had haunted him for several weeks after, and perhaps in a way still haunted him. Several pros had speculated that it had been a statement made out of frustration, the result of being pushed so hard by his junior, yet Akira had not bought completely into that. Ogata was proud certainly, but never was he one to boast without feeling he could back it up.

Still, what would happen this time? The Ogata he'd faced last time had been fresh and sharp, having only two other tournaments going on at that time and one of them, the Tengen, had been in its early rounds of the Main Tournament. This time though Ogata had more going on. Not only was he playing in the Kisei League, but the Honinbo League was now beginning, he was in the middle of the Meijin Finals series and just had returned this morning from Seoul and the Samsung Cup. Would his mind be as sharp, would the stress of the Meijin Finals have begun to wear on him, or would he still be strong? The answer could easily be the difference in the game.

Opening the gate and closing it again behind himself, Akira began to make his way up the path towards his house. Mother and Father were back home now from Korea, and with a break in the Chinese League matches, that meant that his father could take some time to relax at home. He hated to think it, but at times he preferred it when his parents were away.

Stepping through the door and announcing his arrival home, Akira slipped out of his shoes unconsciously and moved into the main residence. Nodding to his mother who stepped into the hallway to inform him when she would be serving dinner tonight, Akira made his way off to his room.

###

Walking back into the house from the garden in the back, Akira sighed contently. It was certainly a lovely environment to take in after dinner, and so relaxing. There was something about the peace and tranquility of nature, especially at sunset that made the experience all the more fulfilling. Nature was like Go, truly beautiful and serene when in balance, a true art form.

Now though he needed to return to studying, as he would not have time later tonight. He'd need his rest for the ordeal he'd face tomorrow.

Moving down the hallway, Akira glanced at the door to his father's study, pausing as he noticed that the sliding door was slightly open. The lights in the room were on, meaning that his father was inside since his mother never went in there for anything. Glancing about for a moment, Akira then stepped toward the door and peeked through the opening.

Sitting before the goban, Koyo Toya stared down at the board, arms folded as if waiting patiently. Moving his eyes from his father to the board, Akira noticed that there was only one stone on the board; Black had played at the 16-4 star point. His first instinct being that his father was recreating a game, Akira's mind suddenly recalled a similar scene like this from before. His eyes darting to the opposite side of the board, his eyes widened as Akira saw that the white Go bowl was sitting there alone.

He'd seen this once before back in April. His father sitting before the board, his first move made, waiting. For what or who, Akira did not know, and the fact that his father who he respected so highly would sit there waiting despite the absurdity of it all only caused his head to ache with confusion.

Sliding the door open quietly, Akira stepped into the room and moved slowly toward his father. He needed to know, to understand even, why his father sat there waiting for some unseen player to make a move that was not coming any time soon. It was not something that the strong, rational Koyo Toya that Akira knew so well would do, this was not the actions expected from the greatest Go player in the world.

Waiting a long moment longer in the hope of an answer presenting itself, Akira then inhaled as no answer came and then said softly, "Father… is everything all right?"

Neither his eyes or his features moving, Koyo Toya replied, "Yes Akira, I'm just fine."

Waiting again for something more but not receiving it, Akira paused, unsure of whether or not he should say anything. He really shouldn't pry into his father's business, but then… "Father, who is it that you're waiting for?"

His head turning now to view his son with surprise on his face, Koyo then smiled warmly and with a slight chuckle in his voice answered, "Maybe no one I suppose. It must seem strange to you, seeing me sitting here like this. Perhaps it's something of a symbol for all the players I still wish to face. There are many strong players in this world and I desire a game with all of them. I will play all of them, both those who are known to the world, and _those who hide_."


	24. Lonely Existence

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 24: Lonely Existence**

 _He spent his days, of course, playing go. For variety, sometimes he picked up his biwa or his flute. Although there was no one for him to play go with, and no one to hear his energetic strumming or haunting notes. No matter how far he walked east, west, north, or south, he never found anyone. Just endless fields of ripened grasses and trees with painted leaves and a mountain range he could somehow never reach._

 _He had no way of determining the passage of time. It was always sunset in this land of eternal autumn. He knew that what he thought was a day might have very well been twenty-four hours or twenty-four weeks._

 _Still, he liked order in his existence as well as in his go, so he pretended to know and woke up at what seemed the proper time and went to sleep when he grew bored of games with himself._

 _When he slept, he dreamed. And in his dreams, he also searched and called just as in his waking hours:_

 _Can you hear? Can you hear my voice?_

 _No one ever answered._

 _So he continued on in the same pattern for what might have been a hundred days or a hundred years._

 _Until the night he drowned in his dream._


	25. Touya vs Ogata I

"My Goodness Hikaru, it's unusual to see you here on a Thursday when you don't have a match."

His face taut with focus, Hikaru turned his head slightly to look up at Shirakawa and replied, "Yes well… this is an important game, and I really wanted to see it."

Nodding with a smile, Shirakawa answered back, "Yes, the Toya – Ogata match right? If I didn't have my 2nd Round match for the Oza 3rd Prelim today, I might have stopped in to take a look at that myself. Ought to be good huh?"

Returning his gaze forward to stare over the counter at the posted schedule on the wall, Hikaru shrugged. "That's what I came to find out."

A moment later the elevator doors opened and Akira stepped out. Pausing for a moment, Akira's eyes scanned the lobby area until they landed on Hikaru. Eyes met across the room and both briefly smiled. The moment gone, Akira pulled his eyes away and made his way toward the hallway to the game rooms, a coy grin sliding across his lips as he did so. _So, you made it Hikaru._

As Akira passed by, Hikaru followed him with his eyes for a moment, and then chuckling softly to himself, turned to follow. Making his way over to Akira who had stopped to remove his shoes, Hikaru began to do the same as he said idly, "Nice day huh?"

"Yes, a nice day." Akira replied in a cold, nonchalant tone.

A little surprised by the tone, Hikaru continued, "I won my second Kisei League match."

"Why are you telling me this?"

Shrugging his shoulders as he put his shoes away, Hikaru replied with a coy grin, "Just saying, I won _my_ second match. I'm looking forward to seeing your match today."

Eyes widening as those words, Akira felt the blood in his veins begin to boil. Was he trying to show off? As he watched Hikaru move off, he suddenly froze as Hikaru softly added, almost murmuring "It's not like I'm trying to tell you that you need to keep up, or motivate you or anything. I don't care whether you or Ogata wins. Besides, if I wanted to help you I'd probably have said something like 'guard the left flank, Ogata likes to take that space' but since I don't care, I wouldn't say that now would I?"

Remaining speechless as Hikaru turned his head back and grinned, Akira returned the smile. Well, it looked like Hikaru had been preparing for Ogata already. Snorting as he turned his head away with a grin, Akira just shot back, "Whatever. It's not like I'd say 'thanks' even if you were helping me."

His grin widening, Hikaru shot back, "Well, see you in the game room." With that he turned and made his way off down the hallway, leaving Akira.

###

Sitting next to the recorder's table tensely, Hikaru waited for ten o'clock to arrive. More importantly though, he was waiting for Ogata to arrive.

Motion at the entrance brought everyone's eyes to the door, but instead of Ogata everyone stared rather shocked as Koyo Toya entered the room. All eyes followed him as he quietly and casually made his way across the room and took a seat next to Nogi. As he folded his arms in his kimono, Hikaru watched on in surprise. This was the first time he'd heard of Koyo coming to watch Akira play, although he'd heard a rumor that he'd appeared at the Hokuto Cup. Still, Hikaru hadn't seen him there, and while he didn't doubt it, he still preferred true confirmation first.

He seemed a different Koyo Toya from the one Hikaru had seen in the hospital though, lighter, as if he had been rejuvenated by something. Perhaps this was a result of his match against Sai, the game that had seemed to light a spark within the master Go player. He'd seemed so enthusiastic, eager even, for the chance for a rematch, one that Hikaru sadly knew would never come. Sai was no longer here to face him, and how he could ever explain that to Koyo Toya, Hikaru didn't know.

His thoughts however were dissipated by more motion at the door. Turning to look, Hikaru's eyes focused on the white suit worn by Ogata Juudan. The powerful titleholder made his way casually over to his seat, pressing his glasses back up his nose with one finger as he took his seat. The whole dynamic of the room had shifted with his arrival, and Hikaru glanced at his way noting that he'd made it by about thirty seconds. Watching Ogata exhale, Hikaru swore he saw a slight bit of smoke exit his lips before the buzzer sounded, announcing the beginning of the battle.

"Onegaishimasu."

Mere moments later Akira's hand dashed to the Go bowl as he pulled out a black stone and placed it steadily on the 3-4 point in the upper right corner.

Ka-Chi.

Resting back in his seat now as he waited for Ogata to respond, Akira took a glance up at his opponent. The 4-16 star point was the likely next target, unless he felt like throwing his weight around early on, in which case he would…

Ka-Chi.

Staring down at the board, Akira held off a smile. So he was opting to skip the lower left corner and go straight to a knight's move in the upper right. It was likely just a probe, an intention to see how he'd respond.

Ka-Chi.

Attaching at 16-3, Akira returned his hand to his thigh and waited, scanning the board for options. He had begun to stir the pot, sent ripples across the calm lake that was the Go board. Whether it was this move, the next, or the one after that, the battle in the corner was about to heat up early in this game. That was fine of course, Akira was ready. All that remained was to see how his sempai would choose to deal with the position he had shown him.

The game progressed rather slow and tedious. This was likely due to the amount of time being taken by both sides in thinking out their moves. It was almost time for lunch now and the game was barely farther along than his match against Kuwabara had been by this point. Hikaru was aware of course that a majority of matches of this nature played out at this pace; he'd even played through a few of those himself before, but it wasn't something he particularly liked.

Frowning as Ogata's stone hit the board, Hikaru sighed. It allowed Ogata to respond by playing his own knight's move to the other side, helping him to set up his position on the left side of the board. Had that been Akira's move it would have placed a major obstacle in Ogata's ability to connect there. Granted it would be more difficult to create a live group from that side, but if he did then Ogata's control of the left side would be dashed.

There, Ogata had played the one space jump at 18-4, helping to establish the corner shape. Akira would respond of course, but Hikaru would have preferred Akira to have chosen to take the initiative over there. He was being overly cautious, as if he expected something to jump out at him unexpectedly. It was puzzling, especially given the aggressiveness and force Akira had demonstrated in many of his matches against top pros, from Zama Oza to Ichiryu. There was no pro player whose games Hikaru had studied more than Akira's, with his father, Koyo Toya being the second given all the games he had reviewed with Sai before. Akira certainly didn't shy away from complexity and challenges, in fact he excelled in those situations. Yet now he was playing cautiously, securing the sure territory over attacking the weak points in Ogata's position.

Turning to scan over the room, Hikaru's eyes came to rest on Koyo Toya. He wore the same stoic expression as Ogata, although his seemed to carry less force and attitude, instead it seemed to radiate… serenity? While Akira shared this trait with his father, it was not nearly as developed in the son as it was in the father. Sometimes Hikaru had pictured Koyo Toya as if he were some sort of superhuman; beams of light shooting from his eyes turning transparent all that they hit, allowing him to see through to what lay beyond.

Ka-Chi.

Returning his eyes back to the game, Hikaru took in Akira's response. An attachment, so that was his strategy. Well if he could get around the edge of Ogata's stones then that play would be quite effective, but Hikaru very much doubted it would occur. Ogata might have several more wrinkles under his eyes than usual, but he was not that weak, unless the tea he was taking a sip from was actually sake.

If that was the case though and Ogata would not allow it, then Akira must know it as well. Hikaru was confident that Akira knew what he was doing since he had played Ogata so many times in the past. It was the same for Hikaru in regard to Sai. While others might have struggled to comprehend Sai's thinking, Hikaru was quite familiar with Sai's tendencies and frame of mind. He would know how Sai liked to respond to a certain play or how he would attack a position, thus letting him take that into consideration when planning out his next move. Knowing what would work and what would not, a true advantage in facing an opponent.

Suddenly Hikaru froze. No, it couldn't be that. Not Akira, he was too poised, too emotionless in his reasoning to allow something like that to interfere with his game, not after all of the high level games he had played in the past. Could it really be that Akira was afraid of Ogata? No, it couldn't be true. Akira always pushed his fear aside and drove in hard and strong, moving ahead despite the reservations he held. Yet as he watched Akira make another move to defend an approach on his stones, Hikaru began to wonder. Unless this was a ploy similar to what Hikaru had pulled on Ichiryu, then Akira would need to pick up his game soon or face defeat. It was still early and the game could still go either way, but as it stood, Akira's heart did not match Ogata's in this match.

As Ogata placed his stone down in the lower left corner Hikaru heard the buzzer sound for lunch. Waiting a moment as Akira and Ogata observed the board, Hikaru began to rise to his feet as Akira did so as well. The expression on Akira's face said it all, he knew that he was in trouble, and had to know what was necessary to rectify it. Sadly Hikaru could do nothing more than watch as his rival exited the room.

###

Taking his seat in the lunch area, Hikaru scanned the room for Shirakawa. Then he spotted him, entering through the door and looking about until he spotted Hikaru. As he was about to move toward him though Shirakawa's gaze moved slightly and he froze. Contorting his brow at Shirakawa's sudden action, Hikaru turned to look behind himself to see what it was that Shirakawa had spotted. As he did however he found that he too had frozen.

Staring down at him from where he stood, Koyo Touya gave a slight smile and said, "Excuse me, but would you mind if I joined you for lunch?"


	26. Touya vs Ogata II - A major Bet

**Chapter 26**

Moving to take a seat across from Hikaru, Koyo Touya settled himself and gazed across the table at the young man before him. Hikaru just sat there looking back, unsure of what to do. All he could think about was to do his best to not show how much his body seemed to be trembling, or was it a tingling he felt? Those eyes, they just penetrated him so deeply, he could feel them even now probing him as if searching for some answer within his soul.

Finally, after what seemed like a short eternity had past, Koyo said calmly, "Thank you for being a friend to Akira. I know this life, this world of Go, can be difficult on someone like him who is different, special. To have someone like you to call his friend and to relate with is good for him, and as his father to see it brings me much joy."

Relaxing ever so slightly, Hikaru began to breathe easier. He had been somewhat afraid that Koyo would have requested another match against Sai, something that Hikaru would have loved to grant if it was within his power. Sadly, it was not, as Sai was now gone. Still, talking to him about himself and Akira, it just seemed… "Well Sensei, umm… I appreciate that and all, but I don't know if I'd say that Akira and I are friends."

Cocking an eyebrow as an amused expression slid over his face, Koyo replied, "Really? Why would you say that? You spend much time at my Go salon together, and I know that Akira enjoys your company. So what would you call the two of you then?"

His shoulders scrunching in slightly as a sense of diminutive size came over him, Hikaru answered, "Well, I guess we're rivals."

A light chuckle escaped Koyo's lips, transforming into a warm smile moments later. "Rivals you say? Well, the two of you are most certainly that. However I believe that you are also friends. I myself have known many rivals in my time, Kuwabara, Ichiryu, So Chan Wan, Shigeo, even if that rivalry is more between our students these days. I'm sure you can understand that."

Hikaru nodded. He had wondered for some time now if the rivalry between the Toya and Morishita groups had been a one-sided affair, but now Koyo Toya was saying that there was some validity to it. Wait until he told Waya.

Koyo continued. "However, in addition to being my rivals, I consider all of them to be my friends. Akira and you are the same Shindo, rivals in the game, but friends outside of the Go board."

Staring up at Koyo Toya in awe, Hikaru blinked his wide-eyed eyelids. Now that he thought about it that way, it sort of made sense. True, he had always thought of Akira as his rival, the person in the Go world he had the most respect for as he chased after him with all he had. The time spent together, their discussions, opinions, arguments even, was it truly possible that out of that rivalry friendship had been born? Was this something that just happened, a rival transforming into something more? Did people just wake up one day to discover such things? And not just friendship, but love too. Was this how people discovered love for one another, just waking up and saying, "Oh, wow, I just realized that I actually love that person." Goodness, it was all too confusing.

"I saw your match against Ko Yeong Ha. I watched it in the team discussion room."

Exhaling, Hikaru closed his eyes and then a long moment later reopened them. Perhaps it was all right, the conversation was moving away. So Koyo had been there after all, he'd watched that match. His eyes moving down to the table between them, Hikaru felt his fists tightening as memories of that match slid back into his head. "Yes, that was a very… frustrating match."

"Because you could not defend Shusaku?" Looking back up now in surprise, Hikaru just nodded, unable to really answer.

Noticing this, Koyo responded, "I heard about how Ko Yeong Ha insulted Shusaku from Kurata. Having seen other game records from your more recent games, I can see your study of Shusaku is as passionate as Kurata described it. I'm sure it hurt not being able to rise to the challenge that day against someone such as that boy. It is the same way I felt when I was unable to defeat Sai, that for all my struggles and study I was unable to rise to the challenge I had given myself."

Hikaru nodded. "Yeah, you retired after that, I remember. Toya-sensei, I never wanted you to do that you know. I just…"

"You wanted me to take Sai seriously. I know, and I'm glad you were so passionate about it. From that game I have begun to find a new vitality, a new kind of Go that I had never known before. You have been a very good influence on my family it seems, and when the gods arranged for you to enter our lives, it was truly a good day."

Blushing slightly, Hikaru replied, "Umm, thank you Sensei. I don't… I don't really think I did all that much but…"

"Oh, but you did" Koyo interjected. "I have also played against Ko Yeong Ha you know. After playing against him, and seeing his game, his soul before me, it was then I realized how fortunate my family has been to know you. Ko Yeong Ha is much like Akira you see; their talents and skills are comparable. The difference though is that Ko Yeong Ha has never known the challenge, the terror, that Akira has known from losing his match to you three and a half years ago. He is cocky, brazen, constantly seeking amusement because he can find no true challenge before him on the Go board, at least amongst his peers. My son may not have become like this even if you had not appeared before him, but back then I could sense his immense sorrow at having no one like himself to play, no rival to call his own.

"Then you appeared and he changed. Never before had I seen Akira so frightened yet determined to improve, to face someone. He has never changed, and it's because he met you. He does not have the time to be arrogant or brash, to sit back and allow his ego to grow, because he knows that if he does-"

"I'll defeat Ko Yong Ha one day." Hikaru interrupted. A moment passed before Hikaru suddenly realized what he'd done, that he'd interrupted Koyo Toya.

Before he could apologize however, Koyo with a warm smile replied, "Yes, exactly. You should also know that I have heard from So Chan Wan that Ko Yeong Ha was quite distraught for a month or so after the Hokuto Cup. Apparently you left an impression on him that lingers, despite his victory."

Hikaru nodded. "He left an impression on me too. That's why next time I'll…"

"Surpass him? For that you'll need to improve some first, get closer to your master's level."

Cocking an eyebrow, Hikaru replied, "Master? Do you mean Morishita-sensei?"

Shaking his head, Koyo leaned in and answered softly, "No, I mean Sai."

His eyes widening, Hikaru replied, "Sensei I-"

"I do not know who, why, or even how," Koyo interrupted, "but I do know from what I have seen of your matches that it is Sai who taught you how to play. Do not worry though, I will not tell anyone else, including Akira. While I do not understand it completely, I will honor your secrecy on this."

Smiling, Hikaru nodded. "Thank you Sensei."

"After my retirement was announced Shigeo came over to visit me and during our discussions he mentioned that you had made a comment on my match against Sai. He said that you saw a path to victory that I had not seen. He was very impressed with you, and even if I were to write off that path as a lucky fluke, Shigeo's opinion of you, not to mention Akira's, carries great weight with me."

"That match against Sai was truly exquisite" Koyo went on. "Never have I desired a rematch against someone as I do against him. It was like… , it was as if Shusaku's ghost had returned to this world and challenged me to a match. Yes, that was exactly what it was like, as if I was facing a modern Shusaku, returned from the afterlife filled with the understanding of modern joseki, don't you agree?"

Hikaru could do nothing but sit there with his breath held. He'd done it, he'd solved the mystery of Sai, found him and seen what he truly was. Koyo Toya, listening to him talk about Go as he did was so much like listening to Sai, that depth of intuitiveness mixed with joy and sorrow. Perhaps he deserved to know, to be vindicated by learning the truth. He could certainly keep a secret.

As Hikaru began to speak however, Koyo began to laugh softly and said, "Heh, what am I saying? I shouldn't talk like that or else people might start to think I've lost my senses. Still, it is an intriguing notion. It's something my students have brought up to me on occasion, what it would be like if Shusaku were to return and knew modern joseki, quite amusing." Turning his gaze to view Hikaru fully Koyo then added, "Come Shindo, we had best make our way back to the game. After all, we wouldn't want Akira to think that we'd abandoned him. Who knows how that thought might drive him in his play."

###

This was not good at all. Taking a towel and wiping the sweat from his brow, Akira scanned over the board one last time. He'd known after returning from lunch what he'd needed to do, spent all of lunch planning out what he needed to do, yet he had not allowed himself to do it once the game had begun again. He had sat back and secured his territory, allowing Ogata to do the same. Unfortunately, Ogata's territory was larger than his own was. All that left then was the center of the board.

Glancing at the time clock, Akira took a deep breath and then exhaled. He had plenty of time still, no need to panic. If he took his time and thought this out, he had a chance, panic and it was over. He had seen and played too many games in the past where a player panicked and overlooked a path to victory, and he could not allow that now, not as things were, with his father present, with Hikaru watching. But did the path even exist?

 _There was a path_. Sitting off to the side watching as Akira searched over the board, Hikaru waited impatiently. The path was not an easy one to see, in fact the first several moves after entering the center looked rather foolish at first, but in the end that path would appear. It would ask much from Akira though; forcing him to abandon the timid and defensive play of earlier, not to mention several of his beliefs on what Ogata would or would not see, but it was there for him.

Closing his eyes, Akira lowered his head and let out a long sigh. _It didn't exist, there was no path to salvation._ If there was, he didn't see it. He had lost, hesitated against his opponent, and been cut down as a result. It was over.

Opening his eyes, Akira felt the words of resignation begin to choke in his throat, unable to arise. Hikaru, he had helped him so much, offered him advice and yet Akira had failed his rival's expectations, he'd allowed himself to feel fear and doubt and failed. He'd failed to keep up with Hikaru.

Turning his head slowly, Akira moved his eyes to find Hikaru. He had to tell him, if only in silence, that he had failed and to apologize. As his eyes locked onto his rival however, Akira saw something else, something that caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end. Hikaru was staring back at him with a fire in his eyes. Not an angry fire, but one of determination. _It could only mean…_

The weight that seemed to press down upon Akira suddenly vanished as his spirit began to rise. Hikaru saw it, the path to victory. He had seen that look in his rival's eyes before, the look of a wounded predator who had not given in, but rather was encouraged by the sheer impossibility of it all. He was undeterred, the path open to his eyes.

His eyes returning to the board before him, Akira once more began to look ahead into the depths of the board. The path he sought, he knew how to look now. If it was Hikaru, then there was a means by which he would respond. When down and cornered, Hikaru resorted to one thing, attack. The path would be strong and bold, striking deeply at his opponent and forcing them to reel back in defense while he took the time to secure the position. Whether it was a thrust, a ko threat or an endgame maneuver, Hikaru would call to push and attack, allowing no time to breathe. That was his Go.

Then suddenly Akira's eyes froze over the board. There, that spot, it was everything that Hikaru would look for, and it was just unexpected enough to force his opponent to think for a moment. First though…

Ka-Chi.

First he needed to enter. Ogata would respond by playing the approach to keep him from playing there himself, and then…

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Hikaru grinned as several people around him began to sit up more attentively. They might think that move seemed wrong, a clear mistake, but in four moves from now they ought to begin to see the purpose behind it. As those moves began to play out across the board Hikaru sat back contently and began to calculate out the final score after all was said and done. It would be close, and though it could easily vary depending on the exact order of the endgame placements, Akira ought to come out ahead by about a point and a half. All that was left now was to…

Ka-Chi.

Hikaru's eyes froze on the board as his house of cards began to crumble at this new vibration. That wasn't the correct order, Akira was deviating, playing something else. No, this wasn't happening, he had been certain that Akira had seen it, but then he…

Ka-Chi.

Yes, Ogata would play there and then there and there and after it was all said and done Akira would lose by a good eight points. As long as Ogata was careful and made sure to respond to… what was he thinking, he was figuring out how Ogata would win now?

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

Both Hikaru and Akira froze. That move, it was… how could they have not seen it? By playing there they'd have to go around on the other side or else… it wasn't going to work. That stone forced them to come down on the wrong side, and more importantly cost about four points in the process.

Hikaru began to recalculate but he knew there was no point. The game was over now, Akira would lose by a good four or five points. He could try and play it out of course, but there was no point and Hikaru knew it. Unless Akira took all the ko battles remaining in his own favor, something that at this point it was unlikely that even someone like Akari would allow to happen let alone a titleholder like Ogata, he had no more chance. It was all over. The only possible reason to play it out would be to force Ogata to keep playing to the end, to say that he won by points rather than resignation.

It seemed stupid, pointless even, but then Akira was nothing if not stubborn, even if it was purely for stubbornness' sake. So it was likely that they'd have to wait until the end before-

"…I resign."

Ogata removed his glasses and began to clean the lenses, Hikaru began to make his way over to the board to discuss. "So", Ogata commented with a sneer as he finished wiping his lenses, "you've grown a little Akira, but you're still quite **below** me."

As Akira's head lowered in shame, tears beginning to well up in his eyes, he sensed a sudden surge of aggression off to one side. Turning to view it, he saw Hikaru scraping his teeth together in anger. Before anyone could respond or say anything else, Hikaru shot back, "He is _**not**_ below you Ogata-sensei! A couple of moves played differently and he would have beaten you!"

Turning to view Hikaru fully as he put his glasses back on, Ogata grinned and with a mocking voice replied, "Maybe, but he failed to make those moves now didn't he? Before you boast about Akira's skill, perhaps you should think things through.'

Frowning as a slight growl entered his voice, Hikaru shot back, "I wouldn't have said that if I didn't believe in what I said. I could have beaten you, and if I can, then so can Touya!"

Cocking an eyebrow at this, Ogata replied calmly, "Defeat me? Hmmm, now that sounds interesting. Perhaps then, since I am your next opponent in the Kisei League, you will show me where your confidence comes from then?"

His anger rising as the Judan titleholder gave him that smug, superior grin, Hikaru responded, "Of course! I won't lose to you, no matter what! And when I do, you'll have to acknowledge that **both** Touya and I are at you level."

Chuckling to himself as he pressed his glasses back up his nose, Ogata replied, "Fine then, it's a bet. If you defeat me, I will. However, if you can't then you will agree to my terms."

Giving a mock grunt, Hikaru shot back, "Fine, whatever."

At those words a devilish grin slid across Ogata's face. "Good, then if I win Shindo…" Ogata leaned closer to Hikaru and said softly, "you will let me play **Sai."**

 **###**

 _ **Credits to : **Leitbur (The Never-ending Road)_


	27. Chapter 27

"So Nase lost huh?"

"Yeah," Hikaru confirmed as he and Waya made their way down the sidewalk. "Lost by two and a half points to Komiya. I told her that it was only one loss, that she shouldn't let it get to her that much, but since it sort of drops her back into the pack with the other four front runners, she seemed a little nervous."

Shaking his head with a grunt, Waya shot back, "Heh, she needs to be careful or she'll start second guessing herself and lose the way Isumi did two years ago. She still has five games left, she should just focus on that."

Shrugging as he and Waya turned a corner, Hikaru replied, "Well… I guess."

Frowning contemptuously at his friend, Waya quipped, "What do you mean, 'I guess'? Of course she needs to get it out of her head and focus on the matches ahead!"

"I know I know," Hikaru responded, "I just meant that I don't think it really matters what either of us think or say. It's her mental battle now, and nothing we say to the contrary will help if she doesn't already believe it."

"Feh," Waya scowled, "Since when did you get so smart? You've been hanging around Touya too much."

Chuckling lightly, Hikaru shot back, "It's not Touya, it's just common sense. No one can fight your mental battles for you in Go, or in anything really. That's just how it is."

Shrugging his shoulders, Waya just sighed. It was rather difficult for him to argue the point given that Hikaru was in the Kisei League with a perfect record thus far while he was still struggling just to make it into 2nd preliminaries.

"So, where is this place we're getting lunch from?" Hikaru asked, breaking up Waya's train of thought. "I haven't seen any Ramen shops around."

Chuckling at that, Waya answered, "That's because we're not going to a ramen shop to pick up lunch for everyone, we're getting sushi."

"WHAT!" Hikaru all but screamed back, "But I want ramen!"

Shaking his finger at Hikaru as he stood straighter, giving the illusion that he was taller than he was, Waya retorted, "Just because you won today faster than anyone else in my study group doesn't mean you get to decide what we all have for lunch. That just gives you the privilege of going to pick up the lunch with me."

Glancing at Waya with an exasperated frown, Hikaru responded, "What you mean is that because I kicked your butt today in our match so quickly that you decided to make me come with you to get the meals while everyone else finished up their own games."

His jaw slacking for a moment at that remark, Waya shot back, "Hey, don't bring that into it. It's become tradition that the first pair to finish goes to get lunch. You didn't have a choice. Now because you won you're treating of course, but other than that…"

"Why am I treating?" Hikaru interjected. "I won, you should be the one to pay Waya."

Stopping suddenly at those words, Waya grabbed his chest and replied, "Shindou, that hurts. You dominate me like that today and then insist on gloating by asking _me_ to pay? So much for the mighty Kisei League player, can't even pay for lunch."

Rolling his eyes, Hikaru exhaled and responded, "Oh come on Waya, at least let me decide what we have if I have to pay. Besides, it's not like I make all that much money either. You do a lot more teaching jobs and Go events than I do."

His brow contorting at this, Waya answered back, "What the heck do you mean by that? It's not like you have to pay to live at your place. Besides, you make way more than I do, so it shouldn't be that difficult for you to pay."

Cocking an eyebrow at this, Hikaru gave Waya a puzzled look. "How do I make way more than you do Waya? Sure I've played in a few more games since I made it to a few second preliminaries and such, but we only make about 10,000 Yen every time we win. Sure that's not chump change, but with all those extra teaching jobs you do, it has to even out."

They had begun to walk again, but at those words Waya froze, his eyes gazing at Hikaru in shock and disbelief. Could it be that Hikaru didn't know, that he had never even bothered to check his bank account? At last he said, "Hikaru, sure we make 10,000 Yen or so a win, but that's like for the Honinbo 1st Preliminary. Haven't you looked at your bank account lately?"

"Not since Mid July. My mom gives me a regular allowance of a few thousand Yen every week or two for lunch and stuff. I pulled a little money out of it to buy my computer back at the end of July, but I just used my bank card for that. Why do you…"

Shaking his head, Waya answered back, "No Hikaru, the game fee for the winner and the loser depends on the level of the match, and you're playing in the Kisei League buddy."

Gulping again, Hikaru inquired, "Well, how much does that pay then?"

Scratching his head as he glanced away slightly, Waya answered, "Wow. I'd… well I'd just assumed you knew. Guess that was kind of silly given all the other holes in your Go world knowledge. The game fee to the winner of a Kisei League match gets paid a little over one million Yen. The loser gets paid about 650,000 Yen, give or take. You've won two matches so far, so that's like two million Yen."

Had there been a bird in the sky at that moment in need of a statue to stand on, Hikaru would have seemed quite suitable for the task. Standing dumbfounded like someone who had just spent an hour trying to get into his locked car where he'd foolishly left the keys only to discover that there was a spare tucked away in his wallet the whole time, Hikaru stared off into space. Finally Waya began to pick up the sound of, "T-t-t-t-two m-m-m-mil-l-l-llion Yen…" being repeated over an over, muttered just barely above a whisper by Hikaru.

"But Waya… a _million_ Yen for every win! I've won two matches already, do you realize how many millions of Yen that is?"

With a rather worried expression across his face as he was beginning to regret having brought this up at all, Waya replied, "Two?"

To be making so much money this fast, it was… dumbfounding. And to think he'd been taking an allowance from his parents still. His mother was even more ignorant than he was on this matter, not from a lack of interest in his income like he was, but rather from a complete lack of information on the subject of Go in general. She worried, fussed over his future, afraid that he'd find neither happiness nor be able to sustain himself on his own. In her ignorance she'd even fussed over the computer he'd bought. He'd have to tell her now, as soon as he truly came to grips with it himself.

Chuckling to himself slightly, Hikaru looked over, grinned at his friend and said, "Waya, I guess I will pay for lunch then."

###

Waya glanced over at Hikaru then back in front of him and said, "Shindou, what's that about your bet with Ogata?"

At these words Hikaru's head shot over to look at Waya. Somehow Waya had found out about the bet. Did he know the details, did he know that… "How'd you hear about that?"

Still looking forward, Waya answered, "I read about it in Weekly Go. They had a small article in the back mentioning the bet between you and Ogata over the outcome of your next match. There weren't any details on the exact terms of the bet though, just that it had something to do with Ogata acknowledging Akira, or you, or something like that. I guess Ogata refused to comment on it, and so I was going to just throw it out as garbage, but the whole thing about acknowledging you sounded like something you'd say. So I guess then that there is a bet?"

Looking back ahead himself, Hikaru then lowered his gaze slightly and nodded. "Yeah, it's true. If I win then Ogata said that he'd acknowledge that both Touyaand I are on his level."

"Why is Ogata acknowledging Touya so important to you? It's not he's your friend or something, isn't he? I meant….I know he's your rival and all, still…"

"Waya, I'm not sure myself either. After Touya's lost I just saw him so sad, so despaired. It hurt me badly somehow…"

"Hey, Shindou, Nase won't like this, I'll bet…"

"What does Nase have to do with this anyway? WAYA!"

"Anyway, I'll throw a small birthday party at my apartment next Saturday. If you like, ask Touya if he'd like to come over."

"Are you sure? Waya, you never seem to like Touya much."

"I don't either. But since you call him a friend…I guess I could endure him too."

"Okay, I'll ask him then."

Turning his head slightly to glance over at his friend, Waya asked, "So what's Ogata get then? Money, or an apology? Maybe you have to admit that you're below him?"

Not bothering to look up, Hikaru just shook his head.

"Cocking an eyebrow, Waya inquired further, "Then what?"

What did he do now? Did he tell Waya the truth, inform him on the conditions of the bet, or lie to him? His initial thought was to do the latter as he'd become quite good at it over the years, but then Waya had always been there to give him advice on how to handle something when he was stuck. Perhaps, on this, he could trust him a little.

"If I lose… then I have to let him play Sai."

While Waya had only been watching his friend out of the corner of his eye, at this statement not only did his head whip around completely towards Hikaru, but Waya froze in his steps. "Hikaru… d-do you know Sai?"

Taking a deep breath, Hikaru exhaled deeply. _Yes Waya, of course I know Sai. He's the one who taught me to play, got me interested in the game. He's my teacher, mentor… my best friend. Not that I can tell you that._ Shaking his head, Hikaru answered, "No, I don't know him."

This answer though only brought about further confusion for Waya. "But then, if you don't know him… how can you let Ogata play Sai?"

Hikaru shot back, turning his head down and away in frustration. "Look, it all happened fast. I was angry at what he'd said to Touya, I wasn't really thinking and then he laid out his terms and before I knew it he was gone and…"

Shifting the pair of bags in his one hand over to the other, Waya reached up and scratched the back of his head then said, "Man Shindo, that's a pretty sucky situation. So what are you going to do about it if you lose?"

Chuckling at Waya's statement, Hikaru looked over at his friend, the person who was so much like an older brother to him. "I can't lose. I just have to win, then it won't matter."

Waya remained silent.

###

Reaching the building entrance, Waya waited as Hikaru opened the door before beginning to move through. As he did so, Waya said, "So, you want me to stop by next Wednesday so we can play and get you ready for Ogata?"

Shaking his head, Hikaru answered, "No, my friend Akari is coming over. She's not that good, but playing her really helps calm my nerves."

"Ok." Glancing back at Hikaru, Waya then added, "Akari huh? Are you two timing Nase now?"

Frowning as he rolled his eyes, Hikaru replied contemptuously, "I am _not_ dating Nase! How many times do I have to tell you again?"

At that Waya broke into laughter. "Isumi was right, your face is hilarious when you say that."


	28. An awkward Situation

Sitting at his computer with a rather bored expression on his face, Hikaru waited as his online opponent thought over the position on the board.

Click.

Waya had once warned Hikaru to be wary of low time on the internet, as he had once watched a game where a player had clearly won but with only thirty seconds left on his clock his opponent had simply begun to fill in his own territory until his opponent's time expired rather than conceding victory.

Click.

He'd spent much of today going over game records of Ogata's old matches, including some of his recent title matches. He'd even spent his lunch glancing over Ogata's final match against Toya Meijin in last year's Judan Finals. He'd stopped studying about two hours ago, deciding to take a break by playing a few games online. Waya had always mentioned that strong players existed on the Internet, and he was right of course, but the problem was that a majority of them were not. Or at least, not compared to Hikaru.

Click.

If it wasn't for the lack of actually feeling the stones in his hands, many of these players could have filled in for his game tomorrow night against Akari. Koyo Toya had been right, it just wasn't the same without the actual stones between his fingers. Glancing over at his board in the corner, Hikaru smiled. There was no replacing the sensation of playing on an actual board. Waya had suggested the other day that Hikaru invest in a higher quality board, perhaps one made of kaya, now that he had this new money to spend. It was an idea of course, but his current board held so many memories; all the games that he'd played on it against Sai.

Click.

Well, he'd do one more sweep of the name list and then call it a night if Waya or someone good wasn't logged in. Games like the last one were merely frustrating, always too one-sided unless he went easy on his opponent. Two thirds of the way down the list Hikaru froze. Memories flashed through his mind as he looked at the name Akira staring back at him on the screen. Could it really be Akira… **his** Akira? As Hikaru began to move his mouse to highlight the name another screen suddenly popped up. A game request… from Akira. Sweat beginning to form on his brow, Hikaru took a deep breath and then exhaled. Moving his mouse over, Hikaru clicked on the Accept button and the board appeared on the screen.

Taking White as his opponent had moved immediately to take Black, Hikaru watched and waited as his opponent played the upper right star point. His mind beginning to focus on the game, Hikaru took the star point in the lower left. Now, how would his opponent respond?

Click.

Click. Click.

Click.

With each move he made Hikaru began to feel the tension and excitement slip from his body. This player wasn't Akira Toya, unless Akira was so drunk he could barely think straight. No, given the last move his opponent had just made, Hikaru doubted that even a drunk Akira would have played that poor of a move. This game was pointless, hardly worth playing.

Half an hour later Hikaru leaned back in his chair and exhaled. Finally, the player had resigned. Exiting the web browser and beginning the shut down process Hikaru rose from his seat and began to go through his bedtime routine. It was best that he get some rest.

###

"Hey Hikaru, sorry, I hope I didn't come too early, did I?"

"No, it's fine. Come on in!"

As Hikaru knelt down to begin picking up the papers and stones on the floor Akari chimed in, "Oh, let me help."

"You don't have to-"

"No, I want to." Akari interrupted. Shrugging as he returned to his cleaning duties, Hikaru caught Akari kneeling down with a smile on her face out of the corner of his eye. _She sure has a nice smile_. As the pair began to clean up Hikaru's mess, Akari glanced at the game being played out on the board and said, "So, is this a game of your opponent's that you're studying?"

Shaking his head, Hikaru replied, "No, it's from that book over there. Shusaku against Shuwa Honinbo, one of their classic games. I find reviewing Shusaku's games to be kind of soothing."

"I see." Looking at the board with a slightly confused expression, Akari responded, "Well the game looks pretty good, even if it's a little strange. Is Shusaku a good player?"

A vein in Hikaru's head began to throb ever so slightly as an urge to shout and scold Akari rose up in his gut, an urge that he suppressed as best he could. After all, it wasn't like Shusaku was well known to those who didn't study Go heavily. So much focus was given these days to more modern players and the latest strategies that quite often the games of long before were neglected. "Yes, Shusaku was an outstanding player. A lot of people say he was the best player of all time."

Her eyes widening at Hikaru's remark, Akari inquired, "Wow, you mean he's even better than Akira Toya?"

The vein in his head throbbing even more now, Hikaru forced out, " _Yes!_ There are a lot of players better than Touya. Ogata, who I'm playing tomorrow, beat Akira two weeks ago!"

"Well how should I know how good everyone is? I've only met three pro players before, you, Toya, and Shirakawa-sensei, and you always said you were chasing after Toya so I figured he was one of the best! You don't have to be so mean about it."

Sighing as he finished putting the stones away and turned to clear the board, Hikaru replied, "I'm sorry, you're right. Maybe I am a little high strung with my match being tomorrow and all. "

Nodding with a smile, Akari moved to sit before the board and said, "So, how many stones should I take?"

Finishing clearing the board, Hikaru said, "However many you want. I don't mind."

Placing her hand to her lip nervously, Akari asked, "Hmm, do you think that seven stones is enough for me?"

Waving her off quickly before he upset her, Hikaru answered, "No no, we can try seven stones. We have plenty of time so if that's not enough we can raise it after."

"Onegaishima!"

Several moments passed by in silence as Hikaru waited for Akari's reply when suddenly she rose up from her seat. Looking up confused, dread began to fill Hikaru. _She's not giving up already is she?_

As Akari got to her feet though she said, "I'm sorry Hikaru, I'll be right back. I need to use the bathroom."

Breathing in relief, Hikaru nodded and stood up as well as he watched Akari turn and exit the room. As he took a seat down on his bed Hikaru suddenly became aware of a voice downstairs. His mother couldn't have been done with dinner already could she? Listening in Hikaru made out, "Why hello Asumi, how nice to see you again. If you're looking for Hikaru he's up in his room."

Nase, what was she doing here? She'd never come over after a Pro Exam game, always calling him up to inform him of the results. As he heard the sound of feet on the steps, Hikaru had to wonder what on Earth was wrong.

Before he could ponder it though the footsteps ended and in his doorway stood Nase, her face smiling as she looked upon him. His brow furrowing as she took a step into the room, Hikaru said, "Nase… what are you doing here? Did something happen?"

Her smile broadening as emotion began to sweep over her, Nase answered, "I can't stay very long; I have to get home. I just wanted to tell you in person though that… I did it, I passed!"

His expression morphing into one of delight and pride, Hikaru replied, "You did? Wow, congratulations Nase, I knew you could do it I-"

Then suddenly before Hikaru could react Nase crossed the distance between them and tackled him back onto the bed, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly as she continued to cry. "Thank you Hikaru… thank you. It's all because of you, I couldn't have done it without you!" Her weight on top of his body only seemed to increase as she pulled him tighter, her tears beginning to mesh against his cheek. "I kept believing in what you'd told me over and over, and I tried so hard and now because of everything you did for me I passed, I'm going to be a pro player!"

Smiling contently as he felt the power of her emotions just pouring out, Hikaru nodded his head slightly and reach around to return her embrace. She'd done so well, she deserved this moment.

Then, as her emotions surged once more Nase reached down, grabbed Hikaru by his cheeks and pulled his head up as she bent down slightly only to feel her emotions soar even higher as their lips met. Logic and reason seemed to vanish as she continued to kiss him passionately, pouring all of her emotions into it as a completely shocked Hikaru's eyes opened wide, completely overwhelmed by what was happening.

To Nase, eternity seemed to pass as their lips continued to press against one another, her mind not really caring at the moment what this meant or how Hikaru might react afterwards. All that her heart and mind cared about right that moment was that their lips were one.

A sudden noise from behind them however brought Nase's mind back into reality as she finally released Hikaru's lips from her own, turning her head around to see what it had been. As she did so Nase's eyes widened in shock as standing in the doorway was an equally shocked, and not to mention terrified, Akari.


	29. Chapter 29

Time ticked on and on, second after second in silence as the two women stared at one another. How much time had passed was difficult to ascertain as brain function seemed to cease all together. At last Akari blinked, her lips trembling.

Meanwhile trapped underneath the weight of Nase's body lay a completely petrified Hikaru, suffering from a shock that was completely different from the shock currently being experienced by the two girls. His lower lip twitching slightly as he lay there unaware of his surroundings wearing an expression that suggested that he had just been hit upside the head by a heavy mallet, Hikaru's mind was a complete blank. Slowly though it was beginning to come back, and the world before his eyes began to take focus. Staring up dully at the ceiling as his head had fallen back on the bed upon Nase's releasing of his cheeks, the murky fog that covered his mind suddenly parted as sound filled the air, snapping him back into reality.

Tears burst out and slid down Akari's cheeks as she began to whimper silently, unable to put sound to the feeling rising in her gut. Hikaru had heard Nase, he knew. He knew that after all these years, their friendship and everything that secretly she…

It was too much now, too sudden. This had not been what she'd wanted, for him to find out like this. The rate of her tears increasing in their flow, Akari's body twisted in the doorway as she spun around and bolted out of sight, her footsteps loud upon the stairway.

###

Kneeling down before the goban as he began to clear off the few black stones and the one white one from his interrupted game against Akari, Hikaru placed the stones in their respective bowls before putting the lids on both. The night had certainly been eventful, although not exactly what he'd had in mind.

All throughout dinner his mother had been inquiring about what exactly had transpired earlier between the three, but Hikaru had simply blown her off. Honestly he wasn't completely sure what exactly happened either, let alone ready to tell his mother about it. After all, Nase had… kissed him.

It was all too much to take in. Hikaru shook his head, trying to clear the memory out. Why had she done that though, why had she kissed him? Sure Waya and Isumi joked with him about him and Nase being an item, but he had always thought that they had done it as a means of annoying him. Could it be that they had seen something that he hadn't? Could Nase really want him to be her… boyfriend?

Then there was Akari. Rubbing his brow as he undressed while getting ready for bed, Hikaru let out another sigh. Could Akari really be in love with him? It was something he'd never really even given that much thought to, love and marriage, starting a family and everything that came with it.

He'd known Akari forever, and for a long time they'd been inseparable. It wasn't until he'd taken up Go that their time together had begun to slip away. Of course back then he'd never given it much thought. Akari was his friend and she'd always be his friend even if he yelled and teased her or didn't really see her that much at all. In that time apart they'd both grown and matured, but he'd never really thought of life without her in it. Had she thought the same, that he'd always be in her life as well? If that was true then had her plans involved them being more than friends? It was hard to say, girls were so strange, especially in the way they thought.

But how did he feel about her? Sure he cared about her, his heart had seemed to sink down into his stomach at the sight of her in tears like that. Yet was that anything more than concern for a close friend?

Then there was Nase. That was actually more confusing than Akari. She was his student and friend, that had been how he'd thought of her. Smacking his face upon the bed before he climbed into it, Hikaru held back a scream. It was all so confusing, and he had no idea how to handle it, what he should do about both girls. Besides, he couldn't afford to let his thoughts dwell on such things, he had a match to win, a game he _had_ to win.


	30. Ogata's Desire and Determination

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)!_

 _###_

 **Chapter 30**

That move, yes, it was the turning point in the match. Taking a moment to remove his glasses so that he might clean the lenses, Ogata pondered the board position before him. It was the third time this week he had found himself reviewing this game, despite the fact that he had other things to focus on, such as his challenge for the Meijin title. After all while he was down in that series 2-1, a victory next week would return everything to a best of three.

Yet here he was, reviewing once more the play of a mere 2 – Dan who had only become a pro the previous year. He knew the ludicrousness of it, how most other pros would have thought him silly for doing such a thing with the Meijin title on the line. Ogata knew better though. Whether he was a 2 – Dan or a 9 – Dan, a player did not simply make it into the Kisei League and post a 2-0 record through pure luck. Granted his opponents thus far were not exactly the most prime measuring sticks given Ichiryu's slump and Kuwabara's well known lack of enthusiasm outside of his own title defense, but both would still crush any pretender who was unworthy to be here.

Even knowing all that though it would still be quite easy for someone to suggest that he take it easy with this game so that he could focus on higher matters. Yet Ogata was going against that thinking, instead preparing himself for the battle ahead of him tomorrow.

Returning his eyes to the board, Ogata couldn't help but be drawn to the same conclusion once again. That one move by Hikaru, it changed the entire aspect and dynamic of the match. Not just any turnaround either, but a massive one that swept Kuwabara back and then with the subsequent push afterwards had left Kuwabara with no time to recover. He'd come to the same conclusion the previous two times that he had reviewed the match and still found it completely inconceivable.

Two nights ago he had spent a full hour going over the sequence of moves that had led up to that stone and after, searching for some sign of its coming, a hint that the move would soon come. The problem was that none of Kuwabara's moves seemed like mistakes as he watched them play out before that move, and that there truly was no warning of any such counter being imminent. It was truly a move that simply appeared out of nowhere.

Shifting his sitting position slightly as he rubbed his chin, Ogata reached over to his cup and took a sip of tea. It was difficult really to get a complete grasp of Hikaru's skill from what was available to him. After all, while Hikaru had volumes of game records for Ogata's old matches to choose from, Ogata really had very little to work with from Hikaru's previous games. The only games that Ogata had access to were his Shinshodan match, his pair of matches from the Hokuto Cup, the final game of the Young Lions Tournament and his matches from the Final preliminary and main league for the Kisei Tournament. He could add in of course the game he'd seen at the Young Lions Tournament against Murakami when Hikaru was an insei along with his match against Ashiwara that he'd had recreated for him afterward during the study group, but there was little else.

Sadly though, save for one or two of the records, the other games were useless. Nothing that came before the match against Ko Young Ha was capable of letting him judge the boy's current skill and several of the preliminary matches his opponent had given away the match. He'd taken a look at the Ichiryu match as well, and while he could extract a sense of Hikaru from it, Ichiryu's play, especially toward the end, made it rather useless. That left him with three games of value; Ko Yeung Ha, the final against Akira Toya, and the one before him, the game against Kuwabara.

Reaching to his other side to grab his lighter along with a pack of his Lark cigarettes, Ogata bit one out of the pack and flicked the lighter switch. Of the three, this was the game that was the most interesting; and perhaps the most frightening. That was the scary part, that the boy possessed a creative instinct that could create brilliance out of nowhere, to be able to spring back into a match without any warning of impending danger. A talent that could not be prepared for, only found through the actual play of a game. It was just like the type of skill he had seen from **Sai**.

Rising to his feet as he rubbed the back of his neck, Ogata exhaled sending a stream of smoke up into the air. **Sai** , the enigmatic figure that lurked in the shadows, an unknown player capable of defeating even his master, Koyo Toya. Hikaru must beSai's student. The similarities in their play, the very nature of Hikaru's style, it all smacked of Shusaku, just as that other boy, Morishita's student whatever his name was, had said. A Shusaku with modern joseki, that had been how that boy had described Sai. Hikaru smacked of the same thing, if not a less refined version.

Heading out of the room and over to his study, Ogata reached for the fish food next to the tank and proceeded to sprinkle it into the tank. To play Sai, a player of such indomitable skill, it was something Ogata desired greatly. That was why the bet had seemed like such a wonderful thing, a means by which he could corner Hikaru into arranging it. Whether it took place in person or over the net was of no consequence, the game itself was what was important. If he could guarantee that, what was risking the Meijin title in comparison?


	31. Chapter 31

"So, you got tapped to record another one of Shindo's games huh?"

Nodding his head as he leaned over the counter in the 5th Floor lobby, Kadowaki answered, "Yeah, since I recorded his match against Toya 4 – Dan in the Young Lions Tournament. I really hope he doesn't play another game like that, it was so intense I could barely follow it, let alone record it."

Nodding, Isumi stared across the counter at the tournament listings on the opposite side; in particular at the Honinbo Tournament listings. It was rather ironic in a way that both he and Hikaru had such similar schedules lately. While Hikaru played his Kisei League match today Isumi had just won his first round match in the Kisei 1st Preliminary yesterday, and next Wednesday both of them played their matches in the Honinbo 1st Preliminary Finals.

Turning to look at Kadowaki, Isumi asked, "So, you made 2 – Dan a couple weeks ago huh?"

"Yeah," Kadowaki answered, "I beat Nakayama to get it. I almost didn't make it in."

Just then the bell for the elevator chimed and as the doors opened out stepped Hikaru. His face stoic and calm as if he'd faced players like Ogata in matches like this a thousand times, Hikaru glanced over and stared right at the pair. Cocking an eyebrow, he made his way over and said, "Good morning Kadowaki, Isumi. Why are you two here on a Thursday?"

Chuckling slightly, Isumi turned to face Hikaru properly and answered, "Kadowaki's recording your game today, I came along to cheer you on since Waya had a job today and couldn't make it."

"Oh thanks Isumi!"

"Hey," Kadowaki remarked with a touch of sarcasm, "try not to play so fast this time huh? You had me sweating last time with that speed Go against Toya."

Flicking his head in understanding, Hikaru's grin lessened slightly. "Sure, I'll think about it."

Chuckling lightly at that, Kadowaki continued, "My, you sound confident. Planning to make short work out of Ogata are we?"

Turning his head away as his expression changed back to that previously stoic mask, Hikaru sighed and then with a slightly cocked head turned to look back at Kadowaki as their eyes met for just a moment. "I guess we'll see soon enough."

The hair on the back of Kadowaki's neck stood on end as if zapped by electricity as Hikaru's eyes had passed over him. Already the beginning of a drop of sweat was forming on his brow. Then just as suddenly the sensation vanished as Hikaru turned away and began to walk off toward the game rooms. As he rounded the counter he took one last glance back at them and with a friendly smile added, "I'll see you both there."

As Hikaru disappeared from sight Kadowaki, whose hand had begun to tremble ever so slightly, watched on for a moment or two longer before turning back to Isumi. "Did you feel that?"

Frowning slightly, Isumi nodded. "Yeah a little. Shindo sure gets intense sometimes. I've seen him like this a few times before. You don't usually see this from him though outside of the higher matches, but you get used to it."

###

Watching the young teenager from his seat at the scorer's table, Amano had to admit that it was hard to believe that this boy was only a 2 – Dan. He seemed so comfortable, as if he knew something that the others around him didn't. While it was certainly true that he'd already won two straight Kisei League matches, even Hikaru had to be aware that the man who sat across from him right now was unlike his previous two opponents.

Rumor and speculation about the supposed bet between these two players had been spreading around the newsroom upstairs for two weeks now, and the possibilities suggested on the terms had ranged all over the place. While several had suggested a monetary bet, others had gone from everything from inclusion into Koyo Toya's former study group to treating dinner. One had even suggested that the loser would agree to cover the winner's travel charges to Seoul for next year's Samsung Cup, although Amano found that to be unlikely. Hopefully after the match he would be able to get a word with one of them on terms of the bet.

It was unusual for Amano to have his notepad out this early before a match writing down small notes, but he just couldn't help but record the scene before him. Just as intriguing as Hikaru's complete calm was the fact that Ogata had arrived so early for the match. Having covered a great many of the titleholder's matches, Amano had to really stretch his recollection to find a time that Ogata had arrived before his opponent, usually preferring the dramatic last minute arrival like his last Kisei match against Akira, even if that had been pushing it even for Ogata. Not only that, but also despite his defeat to Hatanaka last week in Game 3 of the Meijin Finals, Ogata appeared to be quite energized and even eager to play. Last week he'd seemed tired and shaky, as if the fatigue of so many tough games was beginning to weigh on him, but now he was the Ogata of old, strong and focused. He must have really wanted to play this game.

Checking his watch, Amano noted that game time would soon arrive. Glancing about the room, he noticed the other observers to the match. It was a comparatively light crowd from the last few that Hikaru had garnered. Only Serizawa and the young Isumi were present, most likely due to the number of games the other top players were playing in right now. With the start of the Honinbo League it was especially difficult for the top players to have many off days, and it would get even harder next month. If not for his Tengen match today, Amano was certain that Akira Toya would have been present as well.

Motion at the door pulled Amano's attention away from his thoughts, his eyes widened as a grinning Kuwabara entered the room, giving a glance and a head nod over towards Ogata who was watching him suspiciously from his seat before the goban. Hikaru however showed no sign of even noticing the new arrival, his eyes just watching the goban surreally as Kuwabara took a seat next to Amano. As he did so the wily old titleholder turned to grin at Amano and said softly, "Good day for a game isn't it?"

Nodding as he overcame his surprise, Amano answered, "Yes, I think it certainly is Kuwabara-sensei."

A minute later the buzzer sounded and the two players reached for their Go bowls to nigiri. Several seconds after the pair dropped the stones back into the bowls and then exchanged bowls; Ogata would go first. Bowing their heads to one another, the room echoed with the words, "Onegaishimasu." Lifting their heads up their eyes met and the temperature in the room began to rise, bringing a soft cackle from Kuwabara.

Hikaru responded with a stone to the 4-4 star point in the upper left, a move quickly followed by Ogata to the 3-4 in the lower right. It was interesting really, Ogata was playing faster than usual, as if he was anxious. He'd taken quite a lot of time after all in his match against Akira, but now he answered quite quickly. Yes, truly interesting.

Even as that thought crossed Amano's mind Hikaru's stone hit the board, causing Ogata, Isumi, and Amano's eyes to widen, each to varying degrees. Hikaru had played the 3-3 in the lower left corner. Granted this in itself was not overly surprising, as 3-3 was seen quite often at the beginning of games. What was surprising was that in all of his matches that they'd seen, none of them had ever seen Hikaru play that move before. Isumi especially was eyeing that stone with surprise, while Kuwabara just watched on with his usual wry grin.

Staring down at that stone, Ogata glanced up at Hikaru who likewise returned his glare, sparks flying between their eyes. Quite an interesting choice of a move, something different from anything he'd seen the boy play before. Full of surprises Hikaru certainly was. Still, he'd need more than that to beat him.

Taking a stone in hand, Ogata paused a moment and then placed his stone down with force at the 5-3 point in the lower right, a knight's move. There was, after all, no need to rush into the battle. The boy could be unpredictable there, and unpredictable could be very dangerous in such a battle. No, the way to beat someone like this was to slowly grind him down, to limit his options and cage him in, that was the way to victory.

Watching on as Hikaru scanned the board, Ogata reached to pour himself a cup of tea from his tray on his right. As he did so Hikaru placed his stone upon the board. Turning to see where Hikaru had played Ogata smiled inwardly. So the boy had played just to the right of the star point on the right side of the board. He certainly wasn't wasting any time, nor was he allowing him to set up on the side of the board as Akira had two weeks prior. It appeared that avoiding an early battle might not be as easy as Ogata had hoped. Oh well, he'd just have to respond, after all, if he could erase this boy from the board then Sai would be before him, and nobody was going to get in the way of his match of destiny against the Go player who hid in the shadows of the internet, not even Hikaru Shindo. _I'm coming to you,_ _ **Sai!**_


	32. Chapter 32

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

As stone struck wood again and again, Hikaru's mind seemed to focus even more. He had begun to push at Ogata hard, doing his best to bypass an extended moyo. That was what Ogata would want after all, to establish position early before getting into the thick of it. That was why he needed to keep pushing, force extra moves early by his opponent so that he could use them to set up his own position.

Ka-Chi.

Intensity flared off Hikaru as he played his stone, his eyes ablaze as it searched the board for the counterattack that he was sure Ogata was planning. Even if the game had only just begun, the current tempo favored Hikaru far too much for it to have been against Ogata's desire. If Ogata was allowing him to play like this, then there had to be something behind it. After all, while some players might have allowed it out of fear of their opponent, Ogata was not one to fear any challenge.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

Where was it though, the turning point that Ogata was waiting for? While it was true that Ogata was likely fatigued from his recent battle against Hatanaka, such fatigue shouldn't have been showing this early in a match. Of course the board had yet to indicate an advantage as rarely did such things truly appear so early between top players. What decided the early lead were often tempo and position rather than territory, and the only one of those that Hikaru had full control over at the moment was tempo.

Hikaru was well aware that Akira had struggled against Ogata due to a lack of aggression early on, that he had allowed Ogata to play as he liked for a majority of the first half of the match. While Ogata was a player that Akira might feel fear in facing, Hikaru did not share that trait, at least with this opponent. After all, Hikaru had only seen Ogata truly play a sober game once, when he played Akira two weeks ago.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Frowning as he moved to play his own stone in response, Hikaru's attention began to focus on one section of the board. So that was his strategy, to get him to commit into that area too deeply, to get swept away in his own attack until he found his stones cut off. Well he'd just have to see about that.

Ka-Chi.

Sitting back in his seat now, Hikaru watched the board as Ogata made his own move. The setup here was crucial, and as much as he hated to surrender his current pace, it was better to take his time and see the entire thing through. There wasn't room for defeat after all, not with this game. He would not lose though, could not lose, not after last night. Sai had come to him, had given him hope, support, perhaps even his blessing. With Sai on his side, he could not lose.

Ka-Chi.

There, that was the best play. He'd just take this next series with some caution and let Ogata's position in that corner worsen. The longer he kept that trap open the harder it would be for Ogata to recover, and Ogata had to know it. So it was time to see how his opponent would respond. _Watch me Sai, I will defeat him. I can feel it, you're watching this game today, aren't you?_

Gazing down at the board as he continued to wait for Ogata's reply, Hikaru's thoughts began to drift slightly, his hand slowly reaching up to touch just under his eye once more, memories of earlier returning to him.

###

Flexing his right hand as Ogata played a tenuki off to the right side of the board, Hikaru took a moment to evaluate the situation once more and then played his own stone.

Ka-Chi.

So Ogata had realized that he wasn't about to fall for the trap and had taken the opportunity to play elsewhere. Well, it wasn't like Hikaru was that surprised, Ogata wasn't weak enough to try beating a failed attempt with a stick. He could move to shore up the rest of the corner, but that position was fairly secure already. Best to play away as well to keep Ogata from setting up his position elsewhere once Ogata made his own move. Likely Ogata would move to try and establish a position on one of the edges, create some sort of moyo with these extra moves.

That was fine of course, Hikaru was willing to let that go in exchange for the prize he had just gained out of the failed trap. In fact, now that he thought about it Ogata was sort of getting his wish right now. Sai was with him, living in the Go he played, and if Ogata could just see that then perhaps he could gain some sort of solace from it all.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

There, first he'd tenuki to give him some influence on the upper edge before coming back around to overtake that stone. It was possible of course for Ogata to attempt to save that stone, but if he did then Hikaru would be quite content to continue to establish his own position across the board.

Ka-Chi.

A two-spaced jump, that was interesting. The move was a strong one, but it also required Ogata to have true confidence in his own skills. After all, while a one-space jump couldn't be separated on the fourth line or below, a two-spaced jump was another matter all together. No, there had to be a reason for it, he wouldn't try two bad moves in a row.

As Hikaru's mind played out the various scenarios however no answer seemed to appear before him. Perhaps he was looking at it the wrong way, after all it would take him some effort to separate the two stones, and if Ogata gave up at the right time perhaps he could force a favorable position. So then, did he move to separate the two stones, or guard against a possible invasion, allowing the stones to connect?

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

As Ogata's stone detached from his fingers Hikaru's eyes began to widen. He could play there? Would it work, could he survive with a position like that? Scanning the board once more, Hikaru closed his eyes in relief. No, it wouldn't work, not unless…

The blood in Hikaru's veins froze as his eyes shot open and he once more looked over the board. How could he have missed it? Heck, if Hikaru wasn't careful it was liable to spread out into the center as well. It was a small victory in position as the game was still quite young and territory had yet to truly form outside of the lower right corner, but in terms of tempo and control, it was huge. The pace of the game, not to mention sente, now belonged to Ogata.

Gazing on as the game continued to progress, Isumi struggled to grasp the mindset of both of the players before him. Hikaru had been as aggressive as ever in the beginning, and Isumi expected no less from a player who wielded his skill like a war-hammer, smashing his opponent down with each blow delivered. Ogata however was hard to read, his game seeming to move with Hikaru's at first and then out of nowhere transform into another style completely. He had started the game playing a brand of power Go that was much like Hikaru's own style, then changed over to a more subtle style that seemed to throw Hikaru off his own tempo. Truly, it was quite evident that Ogata was a master of the game.

His strategy in the lower right had been brilliant, using the dead group there as a weapon to gain position. It took a level of skill to not only see a dead group as a weapon like that, but to properly pull it off without the opponent seeing it. Hikaru had seen it of course, but too late for him to completely save himself. It was strange really, Hikaru was the one to always see things like that.

Turning his attention to his right to observe the other master Go player, Isumi's eyes focused in on Kuwabara's expression. His head leaning forward slightly as he watched the match unfold, Isumi was especially intrigued by the slight smile crossing the Honinbo's lips, as if he were watching something that he found to be quite amusing. What did Kuwabara think of this match? The Honinbo's insights would be deep, his gaze into the depths of both the game and the soul of each player keen. Memories of his Shinshodan match coming to the surface, Isumi's eyes lowered as he thought of the fear he'd felt while facing the wise old Honinbo. Would that feeling return when he arrived at the higher levels of these tournaments, or would he find the same boldness that Hikaru showed.

Returning his gaze to the board now, Isumi had to wonder, did Hikaru feel nervousness or fear now? Did he ever feel fear during a match like this? If he was, his face wasn't giving any hint of it, nor was the aura about him that Isumi could still make out, even off to the side like this. It was hard to tell right now, the game was so close, a dead heat like two athletes sprinting down the track neck and neck. And there was still so much more Go to play.

Bzzzzzzzzzt!

Glancing at his watch Isumi saw what the alarm had already signaled, that it was time to break for lunch. It would be Ogata's move coming back from the break, and as Isumi rose from his seat he noticed that while Ogata had fixed his jacket while rising to his feet, Hikaru had remained stationary, his eyes focused on the board as if he had not even heard the buzzer. The rest of the room save Ogata paused as they watched Hikaru sitting there motionless as the Judan meanwhile made his way out of the room.

Moving to stare down at the board himself now, Isumi had to marvel at what he saw upon it. Certainly Hikaru's blunder down in the lower right had hurt him, but he had stayed strong ever since and pushed Ogata hard. The current position put Ogata slightly ahead, but this was far from over.

Turning his gaze to his friend as at last Hikaru closed his eyes, turned and rose from his seat, Isumi had to admit that there was something different in Hikaru from moments ago. It was as if observing the board these last few moments had told him something important, brought an epiphany of truth to his consciousness. What was worrisome however was the fact that as it had occurred Isumi swore that the fire in Hikaru's eyes had dimmed ever so slightly. It was likely that he'd just been mistaken, but if he had seen it correctly then only question remained, why?

###

Cackling as he took a seat in the monitor room and pulled out a cigarette, Kuwabara turned his gaze off towards the door where Amano was entering behind him and said, "So Amano, what do you think of the game so far?"

Taking a seat across from the Honinbo as he reached for his own cigarettes, Amano replied, "It seems like quite the battle so far. Ogata–sensei seems to be in control right now, but Shindo is certainly putting up a valiant fight."

"Yes," Kuwabara replied as he took a deep puff from his cigarette, "this game is just getting interesting, neither player has really turned it up yet."

Cocking an eyebrow as he drew out his notepad, Amano inquired back, "Well it certainly would be good to see Shindo overcome Ogata-sensei. Shindo's momentum has begun to garner a lot of support out there in the Go world. People are beginning to turn and look at him."

"Feh," Kuwabara grunted in annoyance, "if you think those things have any effect on this game today then I've lost respect for you Amano. Those two right now, you can tell that this is far more personal than something like glory or recognition from others."

Pausing just as he was about to take a puff from his own cigarette, Amano lowered his hand and responded, "Are you saying that they aren't concerned about their ranking in the Kisei League?"

Chuckling as if to some unheard joke, Kuwabara answered, "Well I'm sure that if you asked them about it they'd say it matters, but I can assure you that once they're before that board anything beyond this game is not in the least bit on their minds. Each one wants to destroy the other, nothing more."

Nodding his head in concession of that point, Amano began to scribble down notes on his pad. As he did so he added, "So perhaps this bet is playing into the match more than everyone thought."

His own eyebrow rising at these words, a slight surprise slipping across Kuwabara's face for a moment before disappearing once more, the Honinbo replied, "A bet?"

"Yes," Amano answered, raising his eyes up from his notepad, "The bet that's reported to have been made between Shindo and Ogata-sensei. No one knows what the terms are, but it brought a little extra spice to the build up to this match. Some think it's just money, others some sort of service or favor. Honestly I had figured it was just a small side thing."

Nodding his head as he gazed down at the table as if no longer paying Amano any mind, Kuwabara then let out a loud cackle as a grin swept over his face. "Well that explains a lot. Yes, interesting, interesting…"

His eyes widening at Kuwabara's words, Amano pushed his glasses back up his nose slightly then said, "Are you saying you know what the bet is Kuwabara-sensei?"

Chuckling at the question, Kuwabara shook his head and answered, "Nah, well not exactly anyway. I'll say this though, you and your fellow guessers are way off. Whatever the bet is for, it's most certainly for something that each of them treasure more than anything else. Yes, to bet everything, put it all on the line, that's how they're playing right now."

Turning to look at Amano fully now, Kuwabara gave him a knowing and mischievous grin and wink, then added, "I'll tell you what though Amano, my money… it's on the kid."


	33. The Juudan's Slayer

It was somewhat disappointing really, as coming back from the break Amano had taken great heed in Kuwabara's proclamation, and had actually found himself looking for Hikaru to show the power and ability that Kuwabara had alluded to. Not that his moves were poor, but rather it appeared as if Hikaru was going through the motions, playing as was expected but not pushing his opponent back. Ogata meanwhile was taking advantage of the indecision of his opponent and had kicked his game up into the metaphorical next gear.

As he watched the stones continue to hit the board, Amano had to wonder what was going through the boy's mind just now. Even a casual player could tell that his opponent was beginning to pull away, and yet he continued to play back, as if waiting for some moment. Something must have happened during the break, something that had thrown the boy's mind out of synch. The fire that had burned in Hikaru's eyes, engulfing the room in its intensity, was dim now as if his spirit had all but broken during the lunch.

It didn't make sense really, usually the break period allowed time for players to breathe and regain their calm, yet it seemed that it had done the opposite to Hikaru. He hadn't been down very much during the break, he had been in good position really, so it wasn't like he'd looked ahead through all the moves to the end and seen his eventual loss. After all, if that were the case he would have simply resigned by now.

Then it hit him; the bet. Was he refusing to resign despite having already seen his own defeat due to an inability to cede the bet to Ogata for even an hour or two? Noting a pause in the action, Amano quietly began to rise from his seat and make his way to the door. This notion was rather disturbing, and if his mind was going to run down this path then he needed a quick smoke.

Ka-Chi.

As he reached the door the sound of Ogata's stone hitting the board caught Amano's ear. Before he could turn to take one last glance however a rush ran up Amano's spine as if a frozen draft had hit him head on. The sensation was followed immediately after by the sound of another stone hitting wood, and as a slight tingle began to vibrate through his appendages, Amano turned back toward the room and reentered, his eyes focused on the board.

Glancing off to his side to notice the most recent moves on the game record as he took his seat, Amano returned his eyes to the board and watched on wide-eyed. Ogata's move had been forceful and full of strong intentions, yet something about Hikaru's response seemed to be… stronger. Taking a glance up at the faces of each player, both locked in thought, Amano felt the sweat beginning to form on his brow. Had Ogata made a mistake that was not yet apparent to someone of his own skill? If so, there was no sign of it on his face; the only evidence being that the blaze in Hikaru's soul had returned and was even now permeating the room. Perhaps this wasn't the best time to go for a smoke after all.

As Amano continued to look on Hikaru scanned over the board, his mind ablaze as he waited for Ogata to reply. Even though Ogata was now taking his time to think, it was now too late for him on that side of the board, his mistake had seen to that. It had been what Hikaru had been waiting for, an opening that he could jump on, a slight mistake that would allow him to enter back into the fray. Really he had begun to wonder if it would ever come, given the crisp play of Ogata up to this point. Now however Ogata had gone lax for one move invading too deeply and with Hikaru's last move there would be no escape. The lead Ogata had been enjoying would soon shrink to a point where it would really not matter at all, and from there the battle for this game would begin.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

No, this wasn't about his career; Hikaru thought. Today was about the bet, his obligatory desire to protect **Sai** from outside threats. As long as he kept Sai's identity safe, kept people like Ogata from discovering the truth then it was possible that Sai would return. If he lost this match and was required to arrange the match that Ogata so desired there would be nothing he could do but to tell him the truth; the truth that Hikaru couldn't bare to utter, that Sai was gone. Hikaru just couldn't allow, something he would battle with all his heart and soul to deny. If it meant winning this game no matter what just to push back the inevitable for another day, week, year, to leave that hope in his very being that Sai still existed and might one day return to him, then he would do it without hesitation.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

Pressing his glasses back up his nose with one finger as he continued to study the board, Ogata exhaled stoically. He had already removed his jacket upon returning from the break, and yet even still he was beginning to feel the sweat on his brow and palms. His mistake had been foolish really, attributed more to a desire to end the game quickly rather than to keep the slow, grinding pace he had been working with previously.

The weight atop his eyes said it all, the fatigue of all of these recent high intensity games was beginning to slide its way in. It would only be a factor though if he allowed it to be one, allowed his mind to lose focus for even a moment. Regardless of the reason though the fact remained that it had occurred and that Hikaru was now making quite good use of it. The lead was still his of course, and he'd just have to play his pace of game and everything would work out.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Hikaru was trying to shore up his position in the upper left by pushing at Ogata's position at the upper edge. An interesting plan, but he had overlooked one thing; that corner was already in Hikaru's control and to fight over a point or two before the endgame was wasteful, not when the center was still open. A small mistake, likely created from inexperience at games with such high level players, but it was good enough. It was time to pull away once more.

Ka-Chi.

As the game progressed Isumi was beginning to discover that a rag to wipe his brow might have been a nice thing for him to bring. Not that he dared leave to deal with such things now, not when Hikaru had begun to come alive. Sadly Isumi was fairly certain that Hikaru was not going to pull this out even if he had made the game closer. Ogata had begun to make a play for the center, and unless Hikaru could break the sente it was going to be difficult to come back.

Motion in his peripheral vision drew Isumi's eyes away from the board as he spotted another figure entering through the door and moving to take a seat. From the look of calm confidence on his face, it was highly likely that Akira Toya had just defeated his opponent Ookubo 9 – Dan in his Tengen match. That meant of course that with one more victory next month Akira Toya could enter the Tengen Main Tournament, which would mark his fourth main tournament in three years of playing.

Turning his eyes to Akira, Isumi watched the young Go prodigy curiously. How did Akira view Hikaru's game now though? By now he must have been able to see Hikaru's worsening position, it was beginning to become more and more apparent with each move. Did Akira see now with eyes like his own, a worsening position for Hikaru, or were those eyes searching for a solution, a place to play like the one that Hikaru had seen for Akira two weeks prior? They'd heavily reviewed that game, and Hikaru's solution had taken everyone in the group by surprise, especially when he had revealed seeing it during the match. Did such a position exist now, one hidden in the depths of the game that even Isumi could not see?

Ka-Chi.

Returning his gaze to the board now, Isumi exhaled silently. Ogata's move there was painful, being well placed and hard to remove. As it was so late into the game too, it was highly unlikely that Hikaru could make up the point difference in the endgame. The expression on Hikaru's face just now was showing that he too knew this. Lowering his gaze and turning his head away now, Isumi closed his eyes in sorrow. So Hikaru's winning streak was now over.

Rubbing his sweat covered brow as he stared down at the board, Hikaru struggled to keep his panic from overwhelming him now. He had been right in it just a few minutes ago, how had everything slipped away like this? As his mind began to process strategies, the panic became harder and harder to suppress. One by one his brain rejected each and every strategy for making a comeback that he examined, each doomed to failure.

He had felt so confident coming in, so sure of his abilities and now here he was, hanging off the edge of the cliff of defeat by a single finger, the knowledge that he would slip any moment now from that ledge ever present in his mind. He had tried everything he could think of, worked strategies and tactics, and pushed Ogata with all he had with this being the final result. He could try to play there but Ogata would ignore the threat and move to cut him off for anything more than a point or two gain in territory.

Closing his eyes as his lips contorted in frustration, Hikaru fought back the anger and tears that were beginning to well up within him. Why had he opened his big mouth, boasted like that before Ogata? Sai would die now, the last hopes of his existence banished from his heart and soul, all because he had acted on pride. Yes, it was all his own fault, his pride had gotten the better of him and now he was lost.

As a tear broke the wall of his eyelid and trickled down his cheek, Hikaru felt the shell crack and then crumble, and with it the pain and sorrow of the knowledge that it held within burst out into every pore of his being, allowing those two words at last back into his consciousness. _Sai…help_!

No answer came however, no sudden inspiration of genius flashing into existence, just the cold loneliness of defeat, the guilt of knowing that his best friend was gone and that he was entirely to blame for it. Pain gripped his chest as he inhaled and exhaled, thoughts and images swirling of all those people who looked to him for strength, all of those people who had faith in his abilities, and those that he looked to for strength. Slowly each of those he cared for most seemed to vanish in his mind, fading into the darkness just as they had in his dream, as if snuffed out like a candle caught in a breeze. Akira, Waya, Isumi, Ochi, Morishita, Shirakawa, Grandpa, Akari… Sai, all of them, his support and his drive, the desire to succeed and progress lived in the people he cared for most. _Sorry everyone, I've lost_.

His eyes prying open as he moved his gaze up to his opponent, Hikaru swallowed back the lump in his throat as he lowered his head, his eyes sweeping across the board one more time and said, "I…"

The last word froze in his throat, unable to release itself as Hikaru's eyes locked onto the board. Electricity flashed through his eyes as he stared down at that one open crosshair. Had it been there this whole time, right before him? As he watched it, Hikaru lifted his head back up, eyes widening as he swore the space had flashed with light for merely a moment, or had it just been the lights from the room catching the board as he lifted his head back?

Somewhere in the far depths of Hikaru's mind a dam broke open, its waters pouring out to flood the valley below. As it did new ideas, strategies and maneuvers seemed to flash alive in his mind, a tidal wave of potential as a tingling rose in the fingers of his right hand. The next thing Hikaru knew his view of the spot was obscured as his left hand reached out and fan in hand pointed straight down at that very spot on the board.

The occupants of the room watched on now with baffled expressions on their faces at the young boy with his arm outstretched, unsure of what was happening as Hikaru's time continued to tick away. Even Hikaru had to admit that he wasn't entirely sure what had possessed him to do so, but the moment he did everything about it felt right.

In his mind's eye the images of all those people from before began to fade back into existence, smiles streaked across their faces as they nodded and gave encouraging gestures. Then finally amongst all of the others Sai's image returned, and the smile across his face said it all and as Hikaru closed his own eyes once more his own face mirrored Sai's smile perfectly.

Withdrawing the fan back to his side as his eyes opened once more Hikaru felt his right hand move for the Go bowl as his spirit began to soar as if liquid lightning were flowing through his veins. _Sai isn't dead, he's alive. He's here, living and breathing and his Go is strong. I understand it now, as long as I exist and remember him Sai will never truly be gone. Sai is alive…in me._

Ka-Chi!

As Hikaru's stone hit the board Ogata's eyes widened in amazement. It wasn't the move itself that had caused such surprise in him as the fan had ruined that surprise quite efficiently. No, what was so surprising was the manner in which it had been played; he swore that Hikaru's fingers had been glowing as the stone hit the board. It was just like before, during the game he'd seen Hikaru play against Akira at the Young Lions Tournament, a light such as he'd only ever seen from his master, Koyo Toya. Had he imagined it, was it just a trick of the light that had given him that impression? He was certainly feeling his fatigue now, and so it was possible that his eyes had deceived him for a moment.

More importantly though was this new move. It was the type of move that he had feared might show itself all throughout the game; the unique flash of creative genius that no one else saw or even noticed that ripped apart strategies as if they had never even existed. He'd have to respond to it, and that was the most annoying part because not only was this stone difficult to remove but it attacked several points of the board at once. It was a stone that took away sente, not to mention his control of the game's tempo. Even now he could feel it, the thunderous electricity forming in the air like a sudden thunderstorm, one whose bolts only struck in one place, right where Ogata sat.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi!

Once again Ogata blinked as his eyes stared at the stone. Again Hikaru's fingers had seemed to glow. What it was or how it was possible Ogata didn't know, but he couldn't let that distract him now.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi!

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi! Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi!

Stone after stone hit the board as the pair began to speed up, the tension in the air rising and rising as shape began to take more and more solid form and Ogata's lead began to shrink. Several times as Hikaru's stones would strike the board a electric shockwave seemed to ripple across the corresponding stones, energy seemingly bursting from the boy as if consumed by an inexhaustible supply that continued to burn like a furnace. Hikaru could feel the flow of the stones, his eyes open to all that seemed to be occurring. Yes, he could do this, there was hope, a light at the end of this dark abyss of a tunnel.

The tingling that had started in his fingers had moved up his arm and shoulder and were beginning to threaten to consume his entire body. The moves just seemed so natural to him right now, as if each stone was not merely a move but rather a part of him, resonating with him and the board in a way that defied anything he'd experienced before. Was this how it felt to play the Divine Move?

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi!

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi! Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi!

They had entered the endgame now, and Ogata was beginning to feel that same desperation that his opponent had felt not too long ago. Hikaru's fingers were still glowing with each stone he played and with it his game had increased to new heights. It was insane really, could a player become this much stronger in the middle of a match? No, this couldn't be happening, he had won the match and earned his prize, and yet now every move he played seemed to be two moves behind what Hikaru was seeing. It was like he was playing a different person all together, an uber-Hikaru that had for a short time dethroned the god of Go himself.

As Ogata's last stone hit the board leaving the game at its end, the electricity in the air vanishing as if sucked into the void, one thought held fast in his mind. Sai, it was like Hikaru had suddenly become Sai. No, it wasn't possible, it just couldn't have been. As they began to count up the points Ogata continued to glance up at his opponent. Was it possible that he had been wrong all this time? It couldn't be that rather than Hikaru knowing Sai that Hikaru _was_ Sai. No, his play was too inconsistent for that, it had to be something else. Yet just now the stones had glowed for Hikaru, just as they did for his mentor, he was sure of it. What did it all mean?

Tears began to slide down Hikaru's cheeks as he and Ogata finished repositioning the stones on the board to reveal the final point total, even if he had known what it was long before they'd even begun to count. Black 77 points, White 73 points. With the addition of komi White gained five and a half points leaving the final tally at Black 77 points, White 78 ½ points. With a margin of one and half points, Hikaru had won.

The wave that had surged through him like a raging juggernaut had died down to that of a slow drip off a leaky pipe as tears of joy continued to slide down his face, breath fresher than anything he'd ever tasted filling his lungs as he threw his head back in relief. He'd done it, somehow he'd pulled off something that he had thought impossible. Even as the rest of the observers made their way over to the board Hikaru felt as if the match had occurred hours, even days before.

Words were being spoken all about him now as an apparently shocked Ogata sat across the board trembling. What was said though Hikaru didn't know, nor just now did he care. He knew one thing though, that he had not been alone today after all. He never had played alone, and he never would play alone because all the people he cared for most were there beside him to lift him up, just as he was there to lift them up when they needed it.

With a feeling of pure ecstasy flowing through him Hikaru sighed contently. _Thank you Sai, thank you… everyone_.


	34. Chapter 34

"Well Hikaru, this is certainly a pleasant surprise. Come in, how have you been, Mr. Kisei?"

Frowning as he removed his shoes and stepped into the house proper, Hikaru gave a contemptuous stare and replied, "Stop calling me that Grandpa, it's bad luck. The league is only half over, I still don't know if I'll even be able to stay in the League yet."

Turning to glance off at his grandfather's back for a moment, Hikaru returned his gaze to the backyard, hesitated a moment, then stepped down into the yard and moved on off toward the loft, his feet unconsciously sliding into a pair of slippers next to the stairway. Moments later he was across the yard into the den and looking up the ladder to the loft. Hesitating once again as perspiration began to form on his palms, Hikaru gulped and then began to climb his way up the ladder.

It was likely silly of him, always going up to check, but if there was even the slightest chance that this time Sai might be up there waiting for him then he'd gladly be silly. Besides, after his victory two days ago against Ogata, the dream and everything that had happened, maybe, just maybe…

Reaching the top and pulling himself to his feet, Hikaru began to make his way toward the back of the loft to where the old goban rested. Kneeling down before it and brushing off a bit of the dust that had settled onto it with one hand, Hikaru gazed upon the board that had changed his life forever. It had been on that day four years ago that he had found this board, seen the stain that only he could see, and met Sai. It seemed like a lifetime since then, and in some ways he supposed it had been a previous life, a life completely different from the one he lived in now.

His grandfather's voice rang loud from the bottom of the ladder, bringing Hikaru back into reality. "Come on, I've got the board all set up."

Chuckling to himself as he rose to his feet, Hikaru answered back, "Yeah, I'll be right there Grandpa." Turning to take one last glance back down at the board, Hikaru then spun and headed for the ladder.

"You know," Heihachi commented minutes later as Hikaru walked by him on his way to sit on his side of the goban, "you can just have that board if you want. It'd be better off if you took it if you're just going to keep coming over and looking at it like that."

Shaking his head with a slight laugh as his prediction came true once again Hikaru answered, "Nah, that's ok. It'd seem weird if it wasn't here."

Waiting for Hikaru to take his seat before the board, Heihachi then said, "If that's how you want it. So then, explain to me how your victory over Ogata Judan isn't enough to keep you from being knocked out of the Kisei League yet."

Moaning softly as he stretched his neck and back in an attempt to feel more comfortable, Hikaru replied, "Well it's not that it wasn't enough exactly. It'll be enough if one of two things happens. If they don't then it gets tricky."

"Oh," Heihachi replied, "and what are those two things? Nigiri."

Giving his grandfather another contemptuous glare before sighing and reaching for the stones, Hikaru shook his head in frustration. He'd given up trying to convince his grandfather to take a handicap, but he had hoped that likewise his grandfather would have given up his stubbornness on not needing one. "Well basically if Akira wins his next match or if Ichiryu 9 – Dan loses either of his two remaining matches then I can't be knocked out no matter what."

"I see. Oh, I'm Black." Then pausing as if a thought had just occurred to him, Heihachi turned to grab the Weekly Go that he had set down beside him and opening it said, "Akira… Akira Touya? Lets see, who does he play?"

"Next Thursday against Zama Oza."

Nodding his head, Heihachi continued to scan the page until he spotted the name. "Ah yes, there it is. Do you think this Touya can win?"

His eyes glazing over as if peering into the misty reaches of the future, Hikaru answered somberly, "I believe in his strength, granpa."

"Hmmm," Heihachi said, his eyes beginning to scan further down the schedule.

Ogata had pushed him to the very limits of his abilities and beyond, and now Zama Oza was looming on the horizon. It seemed like a simultaneously dream and nightmare schedule, four straight matches against titleholders and the former Kisei himself, and then Akira for the finale. For someone of his strength to cut a path through all that and claim the Kisei title, it seemed impossible. And yet here he was, three games behind him and one more titleholder to face, the undefeated frontrunner. Could it really be possible?

With his victory over Ogata, a player who only last week had been praised in the Weekly Go edition that lay next to his grandfather as Japan's current strongest player, there would be no underestimating, no slipping in under a high Dan's radar. Everyone in the Go world right now was likely speaking his name today, searching through online game listings to see just how strong he really was. From now on he was a name that pros everywhere would take as a serious force to reckon with.

Even if that was not the case, a player like Zama Oza who had faced Akira twice before would not have taken him lightly, not after that Shinshodan match against Akira three years ago. Nor was this an opponent Hikaru knew well, or that had been watching him like Ogata and Kuwabara. There was no admiration, no curiosity as to how he might respond, if he could find a way to overcome a situation, to Zama Oza, he was, like all the other pros high and low that stood in his way, a pest that needed to be squashed on the road to Ishibashi and the title of Kisei.

Thus only one advantage remained to him, fatigue. While Hikaru had been busy defeating Ogata, Zama had lost in the Tengen Main tournament's final round match to Fujisawa 9 – Dan, losing his chance to play for the Tengen title. While a title challenge of course would have been helpful in draining Zama's endurance, Serizawa had at the end of August won the right to challenge Zama for the Oza title, a Final that would begin in two weeks, the week after Zama was finished facing Akira.

"So Hikaru," Heihachi remarked, freeing Hikaru from his deep thoughts, "how's that insei friend of yours doing? You know, the girl you're mentoring?"

"Her name's Nase Grandpa." Hikaru answered in a monotone voice before letting out a sigh. Nase, that was the other issue at hand, along with Akari. Looking up from the board at his grandfather, Hikaru then said, "She stopped by the house on Wednesday to tell me that she had passed the Pro Exam."

Lifting his head from the board where he had been struggling to read a position that was worsening by the turn, Heihachi smiled and replied, "Really now, she passed the Pro Exam? That's wonderful Hikaru, I'm sure you're… Hikaru?"

Lifting his eyes back up from where they had been drifting, Hikaru answered, "Yes Grandpa?"

"You don't seem very pleased about this news. Is something bothering you?"

Biting his lip as his fist squeezed together, Hikaru paused. This had been part of why he'd stopped by today, to discuss the situation with his grandfather who had been so helpful with his concerns about Nase last time. He'd actually been trying to figure out how to approach the subject, and now the path had been laid before him. So why did he seem to be hesitating now? "It's… complicated."

Sitting up straight as he removed his hand from his Go bowl, Heihachi cocked his eyebrow and responded, "Complicated? Does this have anything to do with what we discussed before, about your not maybe not wanting her to pass?"

Shaking his head, Hikaru answered, "No, it has nothing to do with the Pro Exam. It's that… on Wednesday she… she kissed me."

Bringing his fist up to his lips in order to hide the grin that way beginning to form on his face, Heihachi replied, "Reeeally. Well this _is_ interesting indeed. Do you know what provoked this?"

Shaking his head, Hikaru again answered, "No, but then Akari walked in on us."

His eyebrow cocking at this new revelation, Heihachi repeated, "Akari walked in?"

Nodding, Hikaru continued, "Yeah, she'd come over to play a game of Go with me and stepped out for a moment. I guess her and Nase know each other somehow, I don't know the details, but when she came back Nase had arrived and was kissing me on top of the bed."

His smile fading as the details poured in, Heihachi felt himself beginning to sigh. _What is this? It sounds like a scene from a poorly written romance film. All that's missing is Akari running out in tears._

"And then," Hikaru added, "Nase said, 'Akari, you mean the guy you told me you were in love with was Hikaru?' and Akari started to cry and ran out."

Rolling his eyes despite himself, Heihachi began to shake his head. _Of course she did._ Then the words sank in. "And what do you think about that Hikaru, about what Nase said?"

Shrugging his shoulders, Hikaru replied, "I don't know, it's all just so sudden. Akari's my friend, both of them are. I never gave ideas like this a second thought. I had other things to think about like tournaments and stuff. Then they throw this on me right before the match and… it's all just so confusing?"

Rubbing his chin as he watched his grandson carefully, his attention taut and serious, Heihachi inquired, "Do you love Akari?"

His head jerking up at those words, Hikaru responded, "What? Love Akari… what kind of a question is that?"

"One that is very important to this situation I'd say. If she loves you but you don't love her then there's definitely an issue. So do you?"

Throwing his head back and closing his eyes, Hikaru sighed deeply. Did he love Akari? How was he supposed to know that? What was love, how could he tell if he loved someone or not, he wasn't even sure how it was that Akari had come to love him. Now that he really thought about it, he'd been rather cruel to her over the years, all those comments and insults, disregarding what she thought to pursue his own selfish lines of thought. How could she have fallen in love with someone like him, someone who treated her like that?

But how could he answer whether or not he loved her back? She had always just… been there. The idea of life without her around was unpleasant, and he wanted her to be in his life but was that love? After all he wanted Waya and Isumi and Nase and everyone else to stay in his life as well, but that didn't mean he loved them. He loved the game of Go, loved it with all of his heart and soul, but love of a game and love of a person were two separate types of love, they had to be two separate kinds of love.

"I don't know Grandpa, I just don't know. I can't even figure out what all of this means let alone-"

"It means," Heihachi interjected, "that those two girls have very strong feelings for you. If this was a Go game of Love, then I'd say that it's up to you to make the next move."

"But I don't even know what my move should be Grandpa. I don't have any experience with this stuff, I don't even think about it really. In fact…I never felt so special about neither of them ever…I mean…special in the meaning of…being more than friends. What am I suppose to do?"

"Hikaru, speaking from my own experience I can tell you that the next move is rarely clear. I would suggest that you start by going to talk to them about how you feel about all this."

###

As he walked down the empty hallways of Taro High School, Hikaru noted the differences between it and Haze. Not by much, but attending this school certainly gave college outlooks a more credible shot than the type of high school that he likely would have gotten into.

Turning down another hallway, Hikaru's eyes came to focus on the door that led to the mathematics room that the Taro Go Club practiced in. This would be only his third visit to the club, his schedule having prevented more trips since then. This was where he'd find Akari, and Grandpa had been right earlier this morning, both about his needing to talk to Akari. While he wasn't entirely sure what he would say to her, he certainly owed it to Akari to try.

"A-Akari , Akari, don't go. I… I need to talk to you."

Freezing in place, Akari stood with her back to the room for a long moment A light smile forcing its way onto Akari's face as her eyes began to show the signs of moistness, she nodded her head and said, "Ok."

Stepping out into the hallway, Hikaru took a glance back into the classroom and then motioned with his head to Akari for them to head down the hallway. Nodding again, the pair began to walk down the hallway, staring straight ahead without looking at one another. Halfway down the hallway Akari then said with dread in her voice, "So what do you want to talk to me about?"

Taking a deep breath, Hikaru answered, "It's about Wednesday night and what happened." Hikaru paused, this was difficult, he wasn't even sure where to begin. Turning to look at her, his eyes glancing back down the hallway at the classroom door, Hikaru exhaled. He might as well try to remove the misunderstandings before the rest of her club tried to castrate him or something.

"Akari, about that thing with Nase kissing me on the bed, that was-"

"You don't have to try and apologize about it Hikaru, I understand." Akari interjected, tears welling up in her eyes.

"NO, YOU DON'T!" Hikaru broke in loudly, "Akari it's not like that at all. Nase, she, well I don't know what she was thinking or doing but she just jumped on me like that and kissed me. I didn't know she was going to do that, I think it just sort of happened since she passed the Pro Exam that day."

"But you had your arms around her, don't try to pin this on Nase alone Hikaru. I know how you are!"

Taking a small step back at that, Hikaru felt a slight pain shoot through his heart. "Akari… you're right, maybe I am to blame. But please try to understand, she kissed me. I…I just unconsciously respond…" Shaking his head as his voice faded, Hikaru began to rub the back of his neck. This wasn't going well, the topic was moving away from where he had wanted it to go. Damn, why did stuff like this have to be so hard?

Turning and leaning against the wall with his head down in defeat as he struggled to continue, Hikaru placed his hand on his forehead as his own tears began to well up. "Damn it Akari, I don't know what I'm saying or am supposed to say or how I feel or anything. All this love stuff, you and me, me and Nase, all of it, I just haven't ever really thought about it. I don't know, I care about you and want you to be happy… it just seems like my life wouldn't be quite the same if you weren't there but I don't know what that means or what love is or any of it. I understand Go so well, it all just clicks in my mind and everything is so clear but this… it's like a murky swamp or mist that I can't see through or even a meter in front of my face.

"It was all just so sudden, Nase being so happy and then she kissed me and you were there and I just don't know what to say or think. I just always thought of both you and Nase as friends. I'm sure I sound like an idiot going on like this I-"

Removing her finger from his lips, Akari continued to smile brightly at Hikaru who found himself returning it wholeheartedly. He didn't quite know how all of that had worked out like it had, but Akari's smile made this whole torturous ordeal worth it. He really did hate to see her cry after all.

"Oh, and Hikaru," Akari added, "about what happened Wednesday night between you and Nase…"

"Yes?"

Without warning Akari's arms wrapped around Hikaru's head as she pulled his face down to her own and their lips met. Once again shock shot through Hikaru's body as his brain began to feel light, Akari's soft lips pressing against his own, her arms wrapping themselves around his neck as he fell back against the wall, her body pressing up against his chest.

Then just as quickly it was over as Akari released him, a slight mischievous grin on her flushed face. Taking a deep breath, she then finished, "we'll just call it even now ok?"

His mind still lightheaded from moments ago, Hikaru just watched Akari turn and walk back toward the classroom, his eyes watching her hips sway back and forth as she walked. What had that been? _Had that been her… tongue?_


	35. Young Princes of Go

The sound of the elevator door opening along with the sudden silence from those around him piqued Ochi's curiosity as he turned around from his examination of the schedule board to see what had caused such a response. For an instant Ochi felt his blood freeze and his eyes widen before both returned to normal as he looked upon the figure of Akira Toya 4 – Dan exiting the elevator. Moments later conversations picked up again as Ochi watched on a few seconds longer then turned back to check the schedule once more. He hadn't thought that Akira had a game today but… no there it was, against Kawasaki 3 – Dan in the Meijin tournament.

"Hey Toya-sensei, come over here please! We're looking over Shindo's game against Ogata and we'd really appreciate your opinion on this position!"

With a soft chuckle that seemed so innocent Touya smiled and began to move over toward the group. "All right, but just for a minute. I want to head to the game room shortly."

Frowning contemptuously as he watched Akira make his way over to the counter, Ochi snorted in disgust. Others might have seen that innocent smile as just that, but Ochi knew better. Underneath that sheep clothing was an arrogant brat with a major superiority complex. Just watching him walk annoyed him, acting as if he actually was **the young Prince of Go** that so many others made him out to be. Akira would probably have to leave the country to find a Go Salon or school Go Club member that hadn't heard his name.

While Akira might have been one of only a handful of young pros that Ochi respected, his overwhelming popularity due from what people expected of him rather than what he had done was quite irksome. How he would love to wipe that smile off Akira's face, to make him look upon him with the serious, focused expression that Akira gave to those players he truly respected himself. Unfortunately Ochi's strength was not enough to answer such a challenge and he knew it. Right now there was only one other Japanese lower Dan pro with the strength to answer such a call, **the** ** _other_** **young Prince of Go.**

"Thank you Mr. Amano for letting me cut the interview short. I promise we can talk again after my game today."

Once again silence hit the room as a voice Ochi knew well emanated out of the opening elevator doors. "Not at all Shindo, I can't have you be late for your match today, not with your 19-game streak on the line."

As Hikaru Shindo stepped off the elevator followed by Amano, Ochi felt his frown increase. Unlike the others here today, he had not taken the time yet to look over this now infamous match between Hikaru and Ogata, preferring to wait until it was printed in the next Weekly Go. Under normal circumstances he likely would have taken a look in preparation for this match, but not with Hikaru, he knew this opponent well enough already.

He didn't hate Hikaru, didn't even dislike him really, it was the way Akira Toya looked at Hikaru and not him that Ochi couldn't stand. They may have been equals as pros, colleagues on the job, but Akira Toya did not see Ochi as a rival the way Ochi saw him. Akira had eyes for only one person as a rival, the teenager that Ochi watched now, the Upstart Prince, Hikaru Shindo 2 – Dan.

"Hey Shindo!" Isumi called out, "We're discussing your match, can you explain this move here? We're divided on why you chose this move over this other move."

Smiling brightly as he altered his path, Hikaru nodded as he replied, "Hey Isumi, Waya, Kadowaki, nice to see you. Sure I'll take a look, don't know how useful I'll be though."

Several members of the crowd broke into laughter as they parted to allow Hikaru and Amano, who seemed quite interested in hearing the game commentary as well, access to what was now revealed to be a small magnetic Go board. As he was about to reach the counter however Hikaru suddenly stopped as his eyes met Akira's. For a long moment the two princes stared at one another, a slight tension in the air, but then it was gone as Hikaru cracked a wry grin and said, "Good morning Touya."

A coy smile sliding across Akira's own face at those words, he returned, "Good morning Shindou. You played a brilliant game against Ogata last week. A truly beautiful match. " He lowered his voice, "I can't help wishing to be the one responding to your moves in a match like that…" Hikaru smiled. _It wont be long, Akira!_

"Yes it was," Amano added, "at times toward the end Toya I almost felt like I was watching your father play. Ha ha, I probably shouldn't speak like that though. By the way Toya, I'm looking forward to seeing your match against Zama Oza tomorrow as well. Now that Shindo here has defeated Ogata you must keep up."

"Touya will do just fine Mr. Amano," Hikaru interjected, "I'm quite sure of it. I'll of course be there tomorrow too."

"Thank you Touya, Mr. Amano," Akira added with a slight bow, "I certainly attend to do my best."

Akira then approached Hikarau and lowerd his voice. "Shindou, are you coming to the Go salon anytime soon? It would be nice…to…to dicuss the Ogata match, you know."

"Oh…that would sure be nice…but I've been overbooked these days. Sorry Toya." Hikaru tried to force a smile.

"Okay then. Never mind!" Akira turned to his heel to leave, trying to refrain a sigh.

"But hey, Waya's throwing a party tomorrow. Do you want to come?"

"Waya-san? But…I barely know him at all. It doesn't seem like he like me, either. "

"Come, Touya! Waya said if you're my friend, then he'd like to get to know you more….I'll be glad if you come, Touya!"

"In that case…then I'll be there."

###

Removing his shoes and stashing them away before heading into the playing area, Ochi moved to the bulletin board to check where he would be seated and upon finding it made his way off to the third row of boards. Taking a seat on the far side of the goban Ochi took a deep breath and then exhaled, his eyes focusing down on the board before him.

He had won five straight games since his loss to Akira in the 1st Round of the Meijin Tournament's 1st Preliminary back in August, but such a streak paled in comparison to the nineteen game streak Hikaru had accumulated. Unlike Akira, Ochi did not feel fear and intimidation when playing Hikaru, despite having yet to defeat either one as a pro player. Everyone hyped Hikaru, top pros like Ogata and Kuwabara took interest in him, but for Ochi Hikaru was still just one of the two players that had passed with him. He might have been in the Kisei League, but as Waya had said before, Hikaru was his classmate, his rival… and he supposed his friend. Even so, he had no intention of becoming the twentieth straight notch on Hikaru Shindo's belt, even if it meant his notch would be next to Ogata Judan's notch.

A few minutes later Ochi spotted Hikaru entering the room followed immediately by Akira , then a good five seconds after that by Waya and Isumi. While three of them made their way to the bulletin board, Hikaru instead scanned the room until his eyes locked onto Ochi, at which point he began to make his way over.

As he took his seat across from his opponent, Hikaru said, "Good morning Ochi. Feeling good today?"

Snorting at Hikaru's remark, Ochi replied, "Good morning. Does it really matter to you, it's not like we're playing in the Kisei League after all."

Cocking an eyebrow at that, Hikaru shook his head and grinned broadly. "True enough, but it's not everyday that the two of us get to face a quality opponent in the 1st Preliminary now is it? So I hope you don't think I'm taking this game lightly Ochi, because I have too much respect for your strength to do something that foolish."

His eyes widening slightly, Ochi replied, "Hmph, well just as long as you don't think I'm going to just let you make it into the 2nd Preliminary."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

Moments later Waya walked by behind Hikaru and took a seat next to him on his right. "Hey, we're next to each other again."

Turning and nodding with a smile, Hikaru replied, "Yep, this ought to be fun, the whole passing class together like this. Oh Waya, thanks for putting down my lunch order for me."

Replying with a friendly wink, Waya responded, "No problem Shindo. I understand you have to do those interviews and such. Hey, once the three of us make it into the Tengen Main Tournament maybe they'll want to do an interview with all three of us huh?"

Laughing at that, Hikaru just added, "Yeah, that would be fun."

###

"Sorry about that guys, hopefully they won't follow us here."

Waving him off as he took a seat at the booth of the burger joint down the street from the Go Association building, Waya replied, "It's ok. We'll just order some drinks and have our lunch here. Not like you asked all those people to bother us like that. Idiots."

"Yeah. But while the other players interrupting to ask about Shindo's match was bad enough," Isumi responded as he took a seat across from Waya, "compared to the amateur players on the 2nd and 1st floors the pros were considerate."

Chuckling as he glanced over at Hikaru who was taking a seat next to him in the booth, Waya added, "Did you ever give that cute girl your autograph Shindo?"

"Oh shut up Waya." Hikaru shot back contemptuously. "I hope this stuff settles down though by next Thursday, I have to face Sasaki 6 – Dan in my Tengen match then."

"Well hopefully it will," Waya commented as he began to reopen the wrapping on his pork bun, "since it'd suck if only one of us made it to the Tengen Main Tournament."

"Oh come one Waya, you and Isumi-san are doing so well, too." Hikaru then remarked. "Believe me, these expectations and pressure look better from outside than inside. I just wonder how Touya handles it all the time…"

"Probably because Toya came in with so much hype that stuff like beating Ichiryu was expected of him." Waya answered between bites of his lunch. "Besides, Touya's pretty isolated, I mean do you ever see him having lunch with anyone…apart from you, Shindou? You're more approachable. Then there's the fact that he's Koyo Touya's son. Not many people want to upset the former Meijin."

"Besides," Isumi added, "If they talk to you now then it seems cooler for them that they knew you before you won the Kisei title."

"But I haven't even won the right to play in the challenger, let alone challenge for the title." Hikaru rebutted.

Chuckling at Hikaru's remark, Waya replied, "Yeah but you're the upstart that just pulled into the lead by bumping off Ogata. You should do more than just play Go online. I was reading over some online Go message boards the other night and several of the… 'experts' I guess is the word, on those boards are picking you to run the table. One guy even said that the betting odds on you just shifted dramatically."

"What am I, a race horse?"

"Come on Hikaru," Isumi chimed in, "you should know that if it can be bet on, people will do it. Look at all the people who lose betting on the Nihon Series. That's just how things are."

His eyes widening as sudden recollection hit him, Waya swallowed his food and then said, "Oh Shindo, speaking of titles and final series, did you hear about Ko Yeong Ha?"

Cocking an eyebrow as he turned to look at Waya, Hikaru answered, "Huh? Ko Yeong Ha? What about him?"

His excitement starting to build, Waya replied, "I just remembered but I saw an article about it online the other day. It said that Ko Yeong Ha had won the right to play for the Ch'eonweon title!"

Shock and confusion beginning to cover Hikaru's face, he responded, "The Cheo-what?"

"The Ch'eonweon title," Isumi provided. "It's basically the Korean equivalent to the Tengen title, although I believe their tournament is somewhat different. This is interesting news, ought to make the next Hokuto Cup quite interesting, especially if both of you have a title by then."

His eyes glancing up out the window as he stared off into nothing in particular, Hikaru repeated, "The Chunwon title huh? Hmmm."

"Heh, I can't wait for the Hokuto Cup," Waya interjected, "this time I'm going to be one of the three Japanese representatives. I won't let Ochi or that Kansai guy beat me!"

"Yashiro" Hikaru added.

"What?"

"His name is Yashiro."

"Oh," Waya responded. "Well this time I'll be sitting next to you Shindo when you beat the pants off Ko Yeong Ha."

"You might not have to wait that long to see Shindo face him again Waya." Isumi chimed in. "The preliminary matches for the Toyota Cup will be starting in January with the main tournament in March."

Recognition appearing across Waya's face, he replied, "Oh yeah, the Toyota Cup. I'd forgotten that one was coming up."

Recognition however, had not been so kind to Hikaru. "Umm guys… what's the Toyota Cup?"

Chuckling at this, Waya then replied, "Well I guess it is pretty new, so I'll let you off on this one."

Confusion still plastered upon Hikaru's face, Isumi answered, "The Toyota-Denso Cup, it's a big international tournament that takes place every two years here in Japan. This will only be the second tournament. Participation is determined through a preliminary tournament. Only the top four players from last time are seeded."

"Oh." Hikaru replied, comprehension beginning to dawn on him.

"Trust me Shindo, it's big, Ko Yeong Ha will definitely be in it," Waya added with a grin. "After all, they don't call it the World Oza Championship for nothing."

###

Klak.

Placing his stone firmly on the board without the slightest waver or doubt, Hikaru scanned over the board even as he removed his finger from the stone. Ochi had certainly gained strength since he had last played him back in May. The Ochi from before would not have been able to see through his attack to the upper left so easily. When it came to analytical thinking, there were few lower Dans as talented as Ochi, giving careful thought to the whole board.

Klak.

His expression unmoving as he observed Ochi's latest move, Hikaru quickly reached for his own bowl. Unfortunately for Ochi, Hikaru had also improved since that time.

Klak.

This is what he had promised his classmate and friend, his full concentration and strength, and he had delivered. Anything less than this would have been an insult to Ochi's pride, and in fact would have likely hurt worse than this crushing defeat would. It all just came down to…

"I… resign."

A warm smile sliding across Hikaru's face at his opponent's concession, he then added, "Thank you for the game." Before he could say anything else however Ochi had risen from his seat and begun to make his way out of the room, leaving Hikaru to clean up. As he finished putting away the stones, Hikaru glanced to his right to take a look at Waya's match. From the look of it Waya was leading by a fair margin, and as long as his friend played his usual game, Hikaru was quite confident that Waya would prevail. Sadly he couldn't stay to watch the rest of the match, as he had promised Amano a chance to continue the interview, even if he'd prefer to watch the match instead.

Rising from his seat, Hikaru turned and spotted Akira doing the same as the crushed expression across the face of his opponent told the entire story of the match. Making his way toward the door, he was met by Akira who paused a moment to wait for Hikaru, then without even a second glance back into the room, Akira followed the other prince out of the room.


	36. A Fatal Encounter

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 36**

Sitting back with a cigarette in mouth, Ogata exhaled, blowing bursts of smoke into the air. Those moves toward the end of the game, how could he have turned it around? The game was more than a week old now and yet it still haunted him. Hikaru's fingertips had been glowing, of that he was certain. It seemed impossible really, to go from a strong game at the level of what would certainly have been that of a high pro of 7 or 8 – Dan to that of Toya Meijin in an instant. No, perhaps he had gone beyond even Ogata's master, into the realm of **Sai**.

That was the other name that haunted him, and it had been for far longer than this newest haunting caused by Hikaru's stunning comeback. Somehow or other Sai and Hikaru were connected, that much was certain, but as to how he didn't know. Those moves were certainly at Sai's level, although having reviewed the game several times already he could tell that they were not Sai exactly. That mysterious Internet player who had both terrorized and thrilled the online go community with his (her?) brilliance and strength like a wired, modern Shusaku. S a i , who refused to hint at his life or even chat with opponents. He thought he'd win that match and finally get to play Sai. But he failed.

Since that lost, Ogata had not won a single match. He'd lost the next two matches of the Meijin Final to Hatanaka and then lost his first Honinbo League match to Hatanaka again. He could not remember himself the last time that he had lost five straight matches. How far would Ogata fall?

With a small sigh, Ogata stood up. Maybe a vacation was in order. It had been awhile since he'd permitted himself the luxury, he'd been so intent on claiming titles. Or maybe trying something new would stimulate him. He'd heard that old Ichiryuu had gone skydiving in Australia after an extended slump and that embarrassing loss against that bleached banged brat, and returned energized enough to pull off a win against Shirakawa 8-dan. Ogata couldn't suppress a small chuckle at the thought of throwing himself out of a plane, thousands of meters in the air, in hopes of invigorating his go.

Ogata took the elevator to the first floor, squinting through the dimmed lighting. He was the only one still at the Association apparently, but he wasn't surprised. It was nearly seven-thirty on a Saturday night after all. His favorite fish store was probably already closed, but the one by the Ichigaya canal stayed open until eight. He paused, debating whether or not to get his Mazda from the parking garage. Usually he preferred to drive everywhere, but the fish store's parking lot was basically a long, steep slope. The thought of some old woman dinging his precious car gave Ogata the shudders. Okay, he'd walk then.

Ogata strolled down the narrow sidewalk that ran alongside the canal. Occasionally, a fish would leap out of the water to snap at a bug, weak moonlight glinting off silvery scales. Ogata stopped to pull his cigarettes out of his pockets. He leaned his arms on the sidewalk's railing as he puffed away contentedly, admiring the way the water looked under the moonlight with the railroad tracks in the background. At night, one would never guess the water actually had an ugly, murky green hue by day.

That didn't mean idiots ought to throw their trash in the canal, Ogata thought, narrowing his eyes. Something big and white had gotten tangled in the roots of the willow tree that clung to the bank, almost directly below his position. He wondered if it were a bed sheet. The way it rippled gently in the water reminded him of the trailing, delicate fins of a white strain of betta. "The Ghost Betta," they called it.

Ogata took a few more puffs, noticing that there were long, black strands attached to the sheet. Bed sheets don't have hair, Ogata noted idly, about a second before his brain put two and two together. Oh shit. In retrospect, he was proud that he only hesitated for a moment before scrambling over the railway (his pants were white, after all.) Ogata crouched low as he picked his way down the canal bank; the slope was steep and his dress shoes had horrible traction.

The stranger was almost completely submerged, except for her head. Ogata was relieved; he wouldn't have touched a corpse. Her eyes were shut, though. If she were unconscious, that would explain why she was still in the water. But then Ogata noticed her hands – her fingernails were literally digging into the tree's roots, her grip was so tense. Surely she had to be at least somewhat aware.

"Hey, wake up." Ogata gently shook a shoulder. "You can't stay here all night," he said reasonably.

The woman's eyes fluttered open. She looked dazed, although Ogata couldn't smell any alcohol on her.

"I'm guessing you weren't out for an evening swim?" Ogata wrapped his right arm around the willow's trunk before extending his left hand. "Here, let go and take my hand."

The woman regarded him warily for a long moment and bit her lip before reaching her hands out. Ogata hauled her forward heavily, leaning back to compensate for the weight of her water-logged clothing. She stumbled on the willow's roots, so Ogata was obliged to catch her under the arm. He suppressed a sigh. Damned good deed was going to get him soaking wet. He placed her other arm across his shoulders. "I'll help you walk to the road," he said, pointing his chin to the left. They'd have to walk alongside the bank; there was no way this woman could manage climbing up the slope and over the fence in her present state. The slope was at least three meters high, and Ogata could feel the woman trembling as if her legs would give out at any moment. He guided her carefully over a small rain culvert. Her sodden clothing certainly wasn't helping matters either – it was long and caught in the overgrown grasses, and it was heavy as hell. Actually, perhaps costume would be a more accurate term than clothing, the style reminded him of something out of a Noh play. He could barely feel her arms under all the layers – who wore three layers of clothes in May? And it was genuine silk, too, judging from the feel of it. And her hair was ridiculously long, at least down to her hips. Nowadays, most women didn't even grow their hair past their shoulders.

Finally they made it to the end of that stretch of canal. Ogata helped the woman sit down in the grass near the road. "Do you want to call someone to pick you up?" he asked, patting his pockets for his cell phone, only to discover he'd forgotten it in the archives room. Damn. "Look, I seem to have forgotten my cell phone. I'm going to get my car, and then I can just drive you home, okay?" Ogata offered, reasoning that the woman must live nearby.

"I was just sleeping... and then I was... drowning." She sounded like she was on the verge of tears. Ogata really hoped not. He could handle just about anything, including a woman having a full-blown temper-tantrum complete with flying go stones (well, that time had actually been rather entertaining, although perhaps he shouldn't have laughed to begin with.) Anything but a crying woman.

"It's okay now." Ogata patted her on the shoulder. "Just wait here while I get my car. It's close. And please don't fall into the canal again."

She offered him the barest hint of a smile as if to suggest she would do her very best.

Ogata hurried back to the Association as quickly as he could stride. He would have jogged, but his dress shoes weren't designed for it. Ogata wondered if the woman really were a sleep-walker, and decided he liked that explanation better than drugs because she wouldn't be going stark raving mad on him anytime soon. He rushed up to the archives room to retrieve his cell phone, then to the parking garage.

When Ogata returned, the woman was still sitting where he had left her. Ogata put his emergency flashers on and opened the passenger door before helping her – and her copious robes – into the car. "Where to?"

She blinked in confusion and Ogata arched his eyebrows up, wondering if perhaps this sodden affair wasn't going to be resolved as quickly as he'd like. She was apparently still suffering from the affects of near-drowning or hitting her head. He turned his emergencies off and drove to the nearest parking lot, flicking on the dome light as he engaged the emergency brake. "It's alright. Just take your time. You're probably still exp-"

Ogata's voice broke off as he got his first good look at the woman. It had been too dark outside with only a quarter moon, but under the dome light he could see that she was gorgeous. Her thick black hair complemented a pale, flawless complexion, and she also had fine cheekbones and a mouth that looked both proud and dainty. But her eyes were absolutely compelling, an unusual shade – violet?- with some of the longest lashes Ogata had ever seen.

Ogata pretended to cough, glad the woman was still too out of it to have noticed his staring. "As I was saying, you're probably still experiencing the effects of a concussion. I should take you to a hospital so they can run some tests."

"No!" The woman sat up straight in her seat, jerking against the seat belt in her haste. "I don't want to go there!"

Surprised at the sudden outburst, Ogata instinctively drew back. The woman flushed and hid her mouth behind a flowing sleeve. "Please forgive me," she said. "I did not mean to be rude. I just don't know this 'hospital' place."

She had good breeding, at least; her speech was very polite and respectful. Although her voice was hoarse, it wasn't slurred at all, which was a good sign. But Ogata was disturbed by the way she referred to a hospital. It wasn't uncommon for people to be afraid of hospitals, but she was acting as if she didn't know what it was. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "What about ... the police?" Ogata ventured. "There's a koban very close, right across from the station."

The woman's fingers curled into her palms. "I'm sorry, I don't know that either." Ogata felt his eyebrows shooting up to his hairline. He'd heard of people temporarily forgetting things like the date and their pet's name, but the hospital? The police?

Ogata stared at the woman. She was quite young, definitely younger than he was. He wondered if she were a college student, and then remembered there were other questions one ought ask a head injury victim. "I'm Ogata Seiji. It's nice to make your acquaintance, although perhaps not under these circumstances."

The woman bowed as far as the seat belt allowed. "Thank you for your assistance, Ogata-san...

… My name ….

My name is Fujiwara..."


	37. Forever is enough!

"Shindo, can you believe this!?"

Freezing halfway through the door of Waya's apartment and blinking in silence as he stared back at Isumi who was holding a copy of Weekly Go in hand, Hikaru finally said, "Umm, do I believe what?"

Motioning Hikaru into the room toward where Honda, Nakayama and himself were sitting, Isumi answered, "This! They updated the information on the new promotion system to say that any and all instant promotions will be retroactive!"

Blinking once more as he finished getting his shoes off and began to head toward the trio, Hikaru replied, "Oh, well then yeah, I really can't believe it! How dare they update the rules to say they're retroactive and everything."

A short pause passed, then Hikaru added, "Umm, Isumi?"

"Yes Shindo?"

"What does that mean, that the promotions are retroactive?"

Contempt flashing across Isumi's face, the young 2 – Dan replied, "It means that anyone who's ever been in a league previously and hasn't made 7 – Dan yet automatically gets promoted, even if they aren't in a league right now. Come on Shindo, I explained to you what this was before remember?"

Blinking once more, Hikaru responded, "Oh, so then even if Akira hadn't beaten Zama Oza on coming Thursday I would have still been promoted to 7 – Dan in the spring? Cool."

Rolling his eyes, Isumi went on, "But doesn't it bother you at all that they didn't announce this little fact until after you'd already clinched a spot in the next Kisei League, making this retroactive promotion moot?"

Shrugging as he settled down on the floor next to a Go board, Hikaru replied, "Not really. It's not like my rank meant all that much after I beat Ogata anyway. Everyone knows I'm strong now. It'll be nice to be 7 – Dan and all, but I'd much rather just play Go."

Honda and Isumi just looked at one another for a moment then shrugged. Yep, it was certainly just like Hikaru to not care about something as big as jumping five Dan ranks in an instant. Then Nakayama chimed in saying, "So, do you think he'll act this calm and unaffected when he wins a title too?"

This brought a bit of laughter from the room while Hikaru just frowned. "WILL YOU GUYS STOP IT WITH ME WINNING THE KISEI TITLE ALREADY!? Damn, you're going to give me bad luck if you talk like that."

The trio going silent at Hikaru's outburst, Nakayama glanced over at the other two on his right and then replied, "Umm, I was just talking about winning a title in general… you know, sometime in the future?"

Chuckling nervously as his mix up became apparent to him in his mind, Hikaru responded, "Oh… sorry about that."

"Just forget about games and ranks for some hours, okay?" Waya laughed. " Fuku, Honda and others are coming any minute now. IT'S PARTY TIME, people!"

###

Akira tucked in the corner at the furthest end of Waya's couch and while Hikaru felt the familiar squiggle of guilt inside of himself at having talked Akira into coming to a party he's obviously not enjoying, it's not until he noticed Akira idly spinning his empty bottle about in his hands with a decidedly un-Akiralike carelessness that he thinks to pull away from Waya's rambling story about some shopping trip or other with Shigeko-chan.

"Yeah," Hikaru said vaguely, clapping a hand on Waya's shoulder in solidarity. "That sucks. I mean, that's great, sorry, whatever; you know what I mean. Sorry; excuse me," he said, weaving past first Isumi then next around the tight tangle of Saeki and Honda so that he could sit down in the empty space on the couch next to Akira.

"Huh," Hikaru said, partly at Akira, partly at himself. Hikaru slowed the pace of his drinking considerably in the past hour, and to find the room still spinning is a surprise. "You're totally bored out of your mind, aren't you?" he asked. In fact, he and Akira never sat that close.

Akira held the bottle carefully in both hands, his attention focused upon Hikaru as his eyes make several slow, deliberate blinks. "I am having a very pleasant evening, Shindou. Thank you for inviting me," he replied, looking somehow at once both very serious and yet quietly childish. Hikaru couldn't have chuckling

"Come on," Hikaru said, getting back up. "Let's go join Waya and Isumi. Waya's kind of drunk and telling totally embarrassing stories about him and Morishita-sensei's daughter; it's horrible; you'll love it!" he assured him.

Akira leant over to set his bottle down on the side-table next to three others. It took Hikaru's alcohol-soaked brain some time to put one and one together; it's not until Akira, despite accepting the offer of Hikaru's outstretched hand, managed not only to stumble over his own feet in his attempt to get upright but to pull Hikaru tumbling back down to the couch with him that Hikaru realised that Akira was where over half of the nashi chuhai had gone.

"You're totally drunk," Hikaru said wonderingly. Touya sat up, straightening his posture with all of the respectable dignity he still possesses. "I am not,"

"So," Waya said from above them. "He's more interesting than I am, huh?"

Hikaru turned to face Waya with his most even expression. "I'm rescuing Touya," he said seriously.

Waya looked down between them and Hikaru noticed that he's still sort of holding Akira's hand for some reason and when he looked back up, Waya is giving him his very puzzled look. Hikaru simply ignored. Akira was staring at their hands with intense concentration, as if they could tell him something. Hikaru now recognised it and let go of Akira's hand, saying timidly "Oops, sorry Touya, didn't mean to, you know…"

Secretly pitying the letting go of hands, Akira looked up, eyes ocean-dark and dilated from the dimness of the lighting in the room. "Do you remember the second time we met, back when we were twelve?" he asked Hikaru.

"Yeah," Hikaru said, of course he does. He's always going to remember the sight of Akira's eyes narrowed with such ferocity, the sound of Akira's broken sobs of anguish as he choked out his resignation. It took him days before he stopped seeing the sheen of the tear-tracks on Akira's face every time he closed his eyes.

"Ooh, are we sharing now? Because I'm pretty sure everyone is dying to hear the story of how you two met. We all thought Shindou was having a big mouth when he showed up to insei class claiming to be Touya Akira's rival. But he's never told us how your paths even crossed in the first place," Waya said.

"He came to my father's salon and played the most beautiful go I'd ever seen," Akira said, and it's supposed to be a compliment to Hikaru maybe but all it does is wrap envy around Hikaru's heart so tightly he could choke on it. Maybe it was naïve to think that years of Hikaru's go could erase the sheer transcendental beauty of Sai's, to think that Akira of all people could ever forget a game.

Akira's fingertips slided slightly against Hikaru, as he asked again, voice like a thoughtful mumur "Do you remember? I remember what your hand felt like then," he continued, and Hikaru's blood was rising in his cheeks. Waya was right there and Akira could't possibly be doing this – it must have been the alcohol's acting. The last time Akira touched him like this almost five years ago.

"Um," was all Hikaru could squeak, and when Akira glided his fingers once more along his, between his, all he could do was breathe in sharply.

"You used to hold the stones between your fingertips," Akira said. "But now you have calluses, and a flat in your fingernail," touching those things as he names them, and something shuddered inside Hikaru's heart .

"Yeah, well, I learnt," he said abruptly, tearing his hand from Akira's, and sense-memory echoed within him.

"Shindou, let's play a game right now!"

"It's late," Hikaru said getting to his feet. "And you're totally not in any shape to play a game." He stepped backwards and bumped into Waya, who steadied him with firm hands on his shoulders.

Akira's eyes flashed. "I'm always ready to face you," he insisted, getting up and standing tall and straight and glowering down at Hikaru. "Stop running away."

"Why? Touya, I'm not running anywhere. We're in the middly of a party, that's all." Hikaru glared.

"Aww, guys," Waya said, giving Hikaru's shoulder a squeeze before he stepped back and adopted what was supposed to be a sagely pose, arms crossed and thoughtful. "Come on; it's my birthday, okay? No rivalry, no fight, please!"

"We're not fighting," Hikaru snapped at the same time as Akira said "This isn't a fight."

"I was trying to say something important," Akira continued. "But of course Shindou can't be serious for more than five seconds at a time unless you put a goban in front of him." Then, realizing what he'd said, Touya grabbed his wrist. "Shindou-play me. Right now. Play me," he repeated.

Hikaru jerked away. "Right now? Are you kidding? No way! We'll be playing sometime at the salon, anyway."

"When? I asked you to come to the Go salon again and again. And you're always _overbooked_. You've gott _stuffs_ to do, am I right? So stop acting as if we could play anytime anyday!"

"But of course we could! Seriously, what's the problem Touya?" Hikaru protested.

"Yeah, you, you don't see any problem at all, am I right?!" Akira countered. "It's gonna be like then again. You wouldn't come back to the salon so I had to join the school club just to get you to play me in the tournament. And after that it was two years and four months before we played again-"

And it's such a ridiculous injustice that Touya was somehow able to say it like it's Hikaru's fault. "You were so freaking disappointed that you never even wanted to see me again! I trained my ass off, to prepare for a rematch with you. How could I face you then when I ranked so much below you?" And he's yelling now, they both were, and everyone was probably looking at them but fine, this was Akira's idea, so why should he care?

Akira didn't shy away; instead he took a step of his own, leaning in so closely that Hikaru could see the ring of darker blue around Akira's brilliant bright irises, could taste the sweet scent of pears on Akira's breath. "It was stupid!" Akira insisted. "Do you think I care what rank you are, what tournaments you've qualified for? None of it matters; nothing else matters-"

"Of course it matters!" Hikaru protested. "I'm never going to stop improving-"

"Stop missing the point!" Akira exploded, words pouring out of him faster and faster. "We play when you want to play. When you don't want to play, we don't play. Of all people you picked that common girl to be your student, and played her games after games. You told me you just wanted to help her pass the Pro exam. Now she's passed, and you continue playing her games after games. Why? What about me? Did you forget that you went into the Go world to fight me, Shindou? Tell me? What about me? When are you about to play me?" Akira heard himself shrieking. He couldn't believe he'd be shouting in front of curious looking Pros like this, but what the hell, he didn't care.

"Wait-" Hikaru interrupted desperately, because this couldn't be what it sounds like, Akira couldn't seriously be saying this, and there had to be something Hikaru could say to stop it. "Touya, don't-I'm not-this isn't-Touya," he said faintly, clenching his hands into fists so he wouldn't feel them shake anymore."This isn't like what you think, Touya. Nase has nothing to do with me not going to your Go salon. I am not like you; I'm just not used to the busy schedule of a higher ranked pro, that's all. You seem to grow up with it, you handle it so well all the time - but I can't, I need time to organize, and to breath, that's all."

Paused a few second to breath, Hikra leaned forward to Akira and lovwered his voice, so only Akira could hear him. "No matter what I do, no matter what you do, we're always going to be rivals; we have forever, okay? We're going to play, at the salon and at your house and at my house and at the Institute and in ooteai and in league matches and in tournaments and exhibitions."

Akira's mouth is set in a flat line and his eyes blazed. "Shindou-" he says, but Hikaru isn't finished. "Our next match is our hundredth game, you know? This time next year we'll be playing our five hundredth. We're going to play hundreds of games, thousands of games; we'll be sixty years old playing our ten thousandth game and it's never going to be enough but it's okay, because we'll just keep playing, you and me, and we'll always play, okay? We're always going to play," he said, searching Akira's brilliant eyes desperately for some sign of softening or appeasement or acceptance but finding only that same glassy shine that made Hikaru feel twelve years old again. Memories flickered in the back of Hikaru's mind as he tried to place when was the last time he'd seen Akira like this, and he had to go all the way back to the middle school tournament when Akira had shrieked at him, panting so hard his shoulders were heaving, strands of his normally-perfect hair wild and caught between his lips. He suddenly found himself wanting to pull Akira closer and hold Akira in his arms, given how fragile and somber Akira looked…but he didn't dare. _What if he pulls me away… ?_

"I-" he started, and while Hikaru had never, ever seen this look on Akira's face before. "I'm sorry to yell at you like that. That would be enough. Playing you until forever – it would be enough."" Akira took a step back. He closed his eyes, smiled, his heart filled with happiness. _Yes, forever is enough, Hikaru!_

Akira then turned to Ways, friendly smiled. "Thank you Waya-san, for inviting me! And sorry for starting the quirrel. I guess I'm leaving now. Happy birthday!" He walked towards the door, the crowd of people parting before him and left.

Some people were decidedly not looking in his direction, but Waya was gawking, Isumi was holding a perfect poker-face, and Ochi was staring slack-jawed in open revulsion.

"Did you see what happened?"

"Yeah, but no clue what was that about?"

"Is it a kind of…confession or something?"

"Dunno….oh come on. Never mind!"

###

Hikaru silently sat back on the couch again, lost in thoughts. Of course he and Akira have been fighting and yelling and throwing things at the Go salon far more often than needed. But this fight was….different. It was not one of those childish, meaningless fights. Could it be…Akira was jealous with Nase? Akira sounded like he thought Hikaru left him for Nase or something. Now if Akira had done the same to him, would he feel hurt like Akira did? Of course he would, Hikaru thought, he and Akira were rivals, no one could replace one's position to the other. But was that all? Could rivalry make someone feel so sad, so desperate like when he looked at Akira despaired, almost teary eyes? Oh yes, those eyes. _Damm you, Akira Touya, you and your eyes!_

 _###_

 _ **Credits to** : Leitbur (The never-ending road) and Cheiromancer (on archiveofourown dot org)_


	38. A beautiful Mistery

A look of vague horror flitted across the woman's face, and she drew her hand up to her mouth. "I don't remember. I don't remember my given name," she said, sounding stunned.

Ogata was alarmed, but he didn't want to upset the woman into tears. "I'm sure it will come to you soon. I'll just call you Fujiwara-san for now. Do you remember how old you are?"

She thought for a moment, then bit her lip. "No."

"Where do you live?"

She shook her head.

"Who's the prime minister?"

" 'Prime minister'...?"

"Do you have a headache, or does your neck feel stiff?"

"No, I don't think so."

That was odd. Ogata figured the woman – Fujiwara – ought to be experiencing at least some pain if her injury were severe enough to make her forget her name. "Can you hold your right arm out like this?" He stretched his own over the dashboard.

Fujiwara mimicked him easily, then stretched out the left as well.

"You don't seem to have any motor skills problems." Ogata fiddled with his glasses again, rather intrigued to have run across someone with apparent, genuine amnesia. It was like a puzzle. Puzzles could be fun off the goban, too.

"Are you a doctor?"

Ogata made a small, dry laugh. "No, I just spent a lot of time harassing one when I was a brat, following her around and playing with her stethoscope. I'm a professional go player; that is, I play games for a living," he said, waiting for her inevitable reaction of surprise or befuddlement or even disdain. He'd gotten some terribly amusing reactions before, as if he'd just admitted to playing professional strip poker for a living.

"That's wonderful," Fujiwara said, her voice soft, but there was something so openly genuine in her tone that Ogata glanced away for a moment, embarrassed at his own assumptions.

"I don't suppose you're familiar with go, then?"

"I apologize. I don't think so. It's just that when you mentioned go, you seemed... happy. Like you love it."

"Sometimes. But that's not really important now," Ogata said, mentally scolding himself. Peppering an amnesiac about go, honestly, Seiji. "I don't think you're in immediate danger, so I think it would be okay for you to go home, although you really ought to go to a doctor tomorrow and at least get a scan done. Have you remembered where you live, or your phone number? Your parents?"

Fujiwara looked down at her folded hands. "Please excuse me. Nothing's coming back yet."

Ogata knew then he was stuck in a tough spot. He really didn't know where else to bring her since her amnesia made her afraid of the hospital and the police. He supposed he could just dump her off at one of those places against her wishes, but the thought of doing that to a young woman this beautiful sat wrong in his gut.

Then Ogata heard the sound of a seat-belt being unfastened, and saw that Fujiwara's face was set in resolve.

"Ogata-san, thank you very much for your assistance. I apologize for taking up so much of your evening and getting you wet. I wish there was some way I could repay your kindness."

"You're just going to start walking?" Ogata asked in disbelief as she put her hand on the door handle, and Fujiwara nodded firmly.

"Where exactly are you going to walk to? It's dark, you're not well, and you don't remember anything. You're also young to be wandering around by yourself." A little harsh, but Fujiwara needed to realize she was being foolish, especially since her sensitive behavior and mannerisms suggested she was used to being sheltered by her probably doting parents, who could afford to buy her authentic, silk costumes.

"I'll be fine. I'm sure things will start to come to me soon. Please forgive the inconveniences," Fujiwara said with a trace of haughtiness as she got out of the car. Ogata realized his miscalculation then: because of Fujiwara's politeness, he hadn't realized that he was dealing with a very proud woman.

Ogata watched her stand in the parking lot, clearly trying to decide which direction to take. I ought to just let her walk around by herself in the dark, sopping wet. She'll learn a valuable lesson. She'd be fine, Ogata reasoned. He ought to forget about her and go back to the Association and actually study for a hour or so, then dinner.

Except it would just be his luck to start worrying about her instead of concentrating. She was exceptionally beautiful, after all. Maybe someone would try to take advantage of her. Or she would start hemorrhaging from an undetected internal injury. Or his mother would find out he let a young woman wander off by herself in the dark. Ogata drew a sharp breath: his mother was a force of nature not to be meddled with.

Well, time for a new game strategy. Ogata got out of his car. "Fujiwara-san, I apologize if I offended you. Why don't you stay at my apartment tonight?" he proposed smoothly. "After you've had some rest, you'll probably start remembering things, and then you can call someone to come pick you up." Ogata usually did not invite people to his apartment, even his girlfriends. He had a very particular order and he liked things quiet so he could concentrate. But one night was okay, and hadn't he been wanting to try something new anyway? Rescuing a lovely stranger was cheaper and safer than skydiving.

Fujiwara hesitated, but Ogata could see uncertainty starting to crumble her proud expression. "You... wouldn't mind? I wouldn't be imposing on you and your family?"

"No, it's not a problem. And I live alone."

Fujiwara bowed to him deeply, almost to her waist. "Then, please accept my deepest gratitude. You are truly a kind man."

Ogata bowed back, a little awkwardly. She really was well-mannered, if a little old-fashioned. And kindness wasn't a trait that was usually attributed to Ogata, but it wasn't like he could have just left her alone in the dark.

###

On the drive to his apartment, Ogata learned a few interesting things. Fujiwara's amnesia was not complete. When they'd driven by a hospital, Ogata had pointed it out to her. She'd recognized the ambulances in front of it, and recalled having ridden in one before, and that memory triggered other memories of doctors and nurses inside the hospital. So she hadn't actually "forgotten" the concept of a hospital, she just didn't recognize the word hospital. The mechanisms of the brain were intriguing indeed.

Given that, Ogata wondered if she did really work for the Takarazuka theater troupe. She hadn't recognized the name when he'd asked her about it, but given her amnesia, perhaps that didn't mean much. He'd gotten a chance to examine her costume more closely, and was convinced it was an extremely accurate replica of a Heian-era nobleman's clothing, especially since Fujiwara had sadly noted that she'd lost her "eboshi" (that funny-looking black hat, if he remembered his history classes correctly.) It had been awhile since he'd attended a Takarazuka performance, but Ogata recalled that the all-female troupe specialized in historical re-enactments, and the actresses who played the male roles were both notably tall and beautiful. He was tall himself, but when Fujiwara had been standing outside of the car, he realized she was actually a little taller. Also, if she were used to playing a character like a Heian noble, it would also explain the deep bowing and why she hid her mouth behind that water-ruined fan when she giggled or was embarrassed. Strange, but yet oddly charming – like one would expect an actor to be.

Ogata removed his shoes in his apartment's entranceway and left Fujiwara there while he fetched towels. She tried valiantly to dry off, but there were simply too many layers of clothing for her to be successful. "You'll have to hang those up to dry. Come to the restroom, I'll give you a change of clothes – I think it should fit you okay, as long as you don't mind wearing men's clothes."

Fujiwara gave him a puzzled look. "No, of course not." Then she glanced down at his floor, hesitating to step forward.

"Don't worry. This apartment is all tile – no tatami here." Ogata gave her a reassuring smile, and she followed him down the hallway. Ogata noticed that her eyes lit up when they passed by the opened door of his study – she must have seen the aquarium, glowing in the dark.

Ogata opened the door to the restroom and gestured inside. "There are more towels in that cabinet under the sink if you need them. Wait and I'll get the clothes."

Ogata went to his bedroom and rummaged through his bottom dresser drawer, where he stashed clothes he no longer wore. He settled on a pair of cotton sweatpants with a drawstring, and a long-sleeved T-shirt, and a pair of thick socks. Ogata, naturally, owned no women's underclothes, so he supposed Fujiwara would just have to make do with whatever she was already wearing or go commando if she so chose. Then he grabbed some hangers so she could hang her clothes on the shower rod.

He handed the clothes and hangers to Fujiwara, who accepted them with a smile. "I'll be in the kitchen putting on some tea for when you're done." The tea would be good for Fujiwara's raspy throat, and maybe it would stave off a cold.

Ogata was pouring the hot water into the teacups by the time he heard Fujiwara emerge from the bathroom. Must have taken awhile to dry off all that hair, a thought that was confirmed by the mussed appearance of her now-unbound hair when she stepped into the kitchen. "I'm glad the clothes seem to fit. Luckily you've got long arms and legs too," he said as he added a bit of honey into his own tea. "Do you want anything in yours?"

"No thank you."

Ogata handed the cup to Fujiwara before enjoying a few sips of his own. He flicked his gaze over her discreetly, noting that she definitely seemed a lot better, displaying no weakness or trembling as she had when he'd first pulled her out. Her body seemed lean and strong, so that would doubtless aid in her recovery from amnesia.

Ogata was almost finished with his tea when he realized that Fujiwara's body was a little too lean and flat. As a matter of fact, she... had no breasts at all.

"You're not a woman." To his credit, he managed to state it fairly calmly.

"Ehhhhh?!" Fujiwara turned a brilliant red and jumped a little, almost sloshing her-his tea out of the cup. "Why would you think I was a woman? I was wearing men's clothes – I'm wearing men's clothes now!"

Ogata almost mentioned the Takarazuka again before remembering that Fujiwara didn't recall the troupe. He could definitely see a little Adam's apple in Fujiwara's throat now that he knew to look for it; earlier, it had been concealed by the robes. But even knowing that, Fujiwara still seemed remarkably feminine in appearance. Ogata had seen beautiful men before—Ko Yong Ha included -but he'd never mistaken them for women. Maybe it was the body language and the behavior. Fujiwara's definitely had a few wires crossed. "Well, you do have long hair and you're wearing earrings, too," Ogata finally stated, trying to pick features that seemed like relatively neutral territory.

Fujiwara fingered his earrings with a slight pout. "Men can wear earrings and long hair too." Then he furrowed his brow in worry. "You're not... upset with me, are you?"

"No, just a little surprised is all. It doesn't really matter," Ogata said calmly. It wasn't as if Fujiwara had ever explicitly claimed to be a woman, or that he had asked. They'd both just acted on their own assumptions. True, Ogata would have been a little more wary of letting a strange man in his apartment, but Fujiwara just didn't seem capable of posing any sort of threat. Although they were both about the same height, Fujiwara looked very slender. Ogata wasn't a big-framed man like Touya Kouyou, but he did work out regularly enough to have a well-muscled body. Fujiwara didn't give the impression of being capable of physical aggression, either.

Ogata let his gaze flick over Fujiwara again, noticing that the other man had lovely posture. Fujiwara being male didn't change the fact that he was pleasant to look at. Ogata could manage with a strange man in his apartment for one night.


	39. Shindou vs the Oza

**Chapter 38 : Shindou vs. the Oza**

Stepping off the elevator into the lobby, Hikaru glanced about and then headed off for the game room. Isumi was here today, but unfortunately was a floor above him with the other high level pros. If it wasn't so important for him to focus on his own match today Hikaru would have stopped by upstairs to wish Isumi luck, especially given that for his first match against a High Dan . Turning down another hallway and heading for an open door, Hikaru exhaled as he felt the hair on the back of his arms begin to rise. Zama Oza awaited him.

Sitting next to the game recorder with notepad in hand, Amano watched on as the last few minutes before the start of the match continued to tick away. Despite the lack of a bet, this match shaped up to be a lot like Hikaru's previous match against Ogata. Both Ogata and Zama were top pros, titleholders, and both were currently in the middle of a title match. In fact if he wanted to draw even more comparisons, both Zama and Ogata had lost their title match game the week before.

On the flip side Hikaru's win streak was still much alive, currently holding steady at twenty-three games after his victory yesterday. It was similar to the streaks of Kurata and Akira, having gotten to twenty-five and twenty-six respectively before being defeated. Both had fallen just short of Kuwabara's record twenty-seven straight wins, but now Hikaru was making a push for it. While Hikaru still would have some work to do before attaining it, especially since the rest of his matches for the next month or so were all 2nd Preliminary matches against high Dans save for the match against Waya, Zama Oza was by far the largest obstacle before him. After all, Zama certainly didn't want to end up like Ogata, especially given that he was defending his title right now. It was strange really, when he'd written in his article that Hikaru had slain Ogata in the match he hadn't expected the name to stick around, or for it to have been so true. Ever since Hikaru Shindo, Judan Slayer, along with many other nicknames, had defeated him, Ogata had not won a single match. Amano wondered how far would Ogata Juudan fall?

Biiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

Without even a glance up at one another Hikaru and Zama reached for the Go bowls sitting on the board and removing the lids as they set them down paused before reaching for the stones. Ten, twelve, thirteen, so Zama would play as black.

"Onegaishimasu!"

Ka-Chi.

Playing the star point to the lower left now, Hikaru watched as Zama took advantage of his lack of aggression to either corner to play the knight's move in the upper right to begin enclosing the corner. That was fine of course, he could still invade the area to a degree, and establishing a presence in the lower half of the board would be more beneficial in the long run.

Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

Intriguing, so Zama wasn't interested in diving straight into a battle with him. If that was so then his loss to Akira must have really put him on guard. Well then, let's see how he'd respond to a pincer on his own stone.

It was a fairly close game, and no more than about fifty moves total had yet been played, but it was also clear that Zama held the advantage at the moment. Zama started chewing on his fan.

Ka-Chi.

Hikaru attached to 17-11. Certainly there was potential with such a move, and against a lower Dan he could likely take the entire right side of the board, but Amano wondered if it would work against the Oza.

Ka-Chi.

Yes, Zama had played the hane, and while that was the move that most pros would have come up with it was also going to require some effort on Hikaru's part to overcome. Unlike the central areas of the board or even the main sections of the corner the room to maneuver on the side of the board was limited and required sharp, well thought out moves to properly establish the desired position. This was actually not common at all amongst players of equal strength, often the side edges being diced and divided from the original planned shape.

Not that Hikaru was incapable of rising to this occasion, but it would be difficult. Still, if anyone could create a surprise comeback out of thin air, it was going to be Hikaru. First he'd need to extend, and force Zama to fight with him down to the lower right where Hikaru's position could support him before trying to hook back up to take the upper section. Whether he could get Zama to chase after him would be another issue; truly a fine needle to thread. Of course he could…

Biiiiiiiiiiiii!

###

"You know Shindo we didn't have to come to this place for lunch, I don't mind going out for ramen."

Shaking his head as he made his way back to the booth with lunch tray in hand, Hikaru replied, "No way, you like eating here, and today's your first Thursday match. Oh, and it's my treat."

Frowning as he took his own seat across from Hikaru, Isumi responded, "I can pay for my own food. You don't have to make a big deal about this."

Shaking his head once more, Hikaru shot back, "No, it is big. This is a big step for you and I think we should celebrate it. Besides, I made over a million-Yen for each of my Kisei League wins, and I still live at home. My money's not as tight as yours is, so just accept my treat graciously."

Chuckling to himself with his glass halfway to his mouth, Isumi answered, "Ok fine, have it your way Mr. Kisei League. I graciously accept your offer to pay for lunch."

Eyeing Isumi contemptuously as he was fairly certain he was being mocked, Hikaru took a sip from his own drink before saying, "So, how is your game going? Setting the stage to become the Oza Slayer next?"

His eyes narrowing ever so slightly at the last quip, Hikaru remained silent on it. He'd begun to think as of late that these sorts of teasing remarks were how Isumi and the others he spent time with were keeping him as one of their own, his high level of play making it difficult to match up against. Even though he really didn't like the new nickname of Judan Slayer, he did understand his friend's need to mock his progress from time to time. Plus if he took a step back it was actually rather funny. "It's… interesting. I'm behind right now but there's still plenty of game to play. I never expected Zama Oza to be a cakewalk anyway, and he's certainly not taking me lightly."

Giving Hikaru an affirming head flick, Isumi took another sip from his drink and replied, "I can only imagine. My only game against a top pro like that was against Kuwabara-sensei in my Shinshodan match, but I doubt even that was comparable, especially with the reverse komi rule."

"Yeah it's not the same," Hikaru responded, "it's harder. Zama Oza… he's a truly resilient wall to leap. Touya once told me that Zama Oza wasn't someone that could be defeated on the first try. While I don't know if that's true or not yet, I can already see what prompted Touya to say that."

Shrugging casually, Isumi took another bite of his sandwich and said, "Well if worse comes to worst you can always go glowing on him."

Cocking an eyebrow as Isumi took another bite Hikaru replied, "What?"

Swallowing Isumi answered calmly, "Go glowing on him, you know, like before?"

His brow contorting in confusion at his friend's words, Hikaru replied, "What do you think I am Isumi? A Disco ball?"

"Shindo… I'm not joking. Didn't you notice during your comeback against Ogata-sensei that your fingertips were glowing?"

Laughing heartily at Isumi's words, Hikaru shook his head.

Isumi replied, "I don't know what it was, a trick of the light, or something altogether different, but your fingertips were glowing during your comeback. Kadowaki saw it too."

His jaw slacking ever so slightly, Hikaru pulled his gaze away from his friend as he gazed down at his hands. Could it have been possible? He'd only ever seen an effect like that twice before, the two times he'd played against Koyo Toya, even if Sai had been the one making the moves both times. While Hikaru had often speculated afterward that Sai likely could have caused the same effect, he'd never seen it manifest itself in someone else before. "Isumi… if that's true then I have no idea how I did it, or how to do it again."

Shrugging again, Isumi replied as he finished off his sandwich, "Well why don't you practice."

His brow furrowing in surprise and annoyance, Hikaru shot back, "What are you joking about? It's the middle of the lunch break."

Not showing the slightest bit of worry as he took another sip of his drink before rising from his seat, Isumi answered, "Well then you shouldn't waste time. Here."

With that Isumi reached into his pocket and removed a single black stone. Before Hikaru could reply Isumi had set it down on the table and taking his tray in hand turned and gave Hikaru a friendly wave goodbye.

Watching his friend depart, Hikaru glanced down at the stone and began to chuckle, shaking his head in amusement. What a silly idea, as if something like that would work. Turning his head with a large grin to survey the rest of the establishment, Hikaru's lips suddenly went taut as his eyes slid around to gaze at the stone silently out of his peripheral vision. Staring down at it out of the corner of his eye, Hikaru just continued to watch it for a long minute as his mind began to reprocess the data.

At last he reached for the stone and taking it between his fingers Hikaru took a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching, and then slapped the stone down on the table. _Glow!_ Nothing happened however even as he continued to stare at it in forced concentration. _Glow!_ Again he played the stone down on the table with no result. Staring down at the stone for another minute or so, Hikaru finally shook his head and rose from his seat. _This is stupid. I have to stay focused on this match or I'm never going to win. Glowing stones indeed._

 _###_

Sweat dripped down Amano's face as he watched on in suspense and wonder. The second half of the match was shaping up to be quite the sight to see if Hikaru's early moves were any indication. He'd come back from lunch with an aggressive hane of his own and the battle had waged on from there. While he was certainly not an expert on the game to the degree that either of these two were, or for that matter anyone else in the room was, he did have a certain understanding from his many years of reporting on the game. Those years of experience were telling him that while Hikaru was certainly pushing and taking the offensive he needed to be wary as well.

Ka-Chi.

As Zama played his move, releasing the black stone from his fingers, he sat back in his seat and pondered the board. This boy, he had certainly come back from break with a fire that he had not possessed previously. Whether the lack of pressure before had merely been to lull him into thinking it would be an easy win or not Zama didn't know, but either way he wasn't the type to allow such things to affect his play. The last few moves were interesting, and had come with a fairly rapid response rate. Either he'd planned for every contingency during lunch or else his ability to read the board was at the same level as any top pro.

Lifting his eyes to observe his opponent, Zama began once more to chew on the end of his recently purchased .This boy sure had ability, Zama admitted inwardly, but as long as Zama was careful it wouldn't matter.

Ka-Chi.

So he was attacking that way. Removing the fan from his lips to take a sip from his cup of tea, Zama exhaled and studied the position. If that was the plan Hikaru was using then he could deflect it that way, even though it would let him work around and across the center eventually. However there was another option, one that would cost him a few pieces of territory, but then if it worked it wouldn't matter at all.

Ka-Chi.

As Zama's stone hit the board Hikaru's eyes widened in surprised. A tenuki, and not just any tenuki, but an atari to his position on the upper edge. It was a brilliant play, and it forced him to find a compromising solution. If he eliminated the threat to the upper edge Zama would take away his ability to continue his offensive, but if he left that stone standing it'd likely make little difference even if his invasion was a complete success.

Closing his eyes as he inhaled, Hikaru gripped the fan in his right hand fiercely, letting the panic and surprise drain out of him. He saw clearly the path that was before Zama Oza's eyes, the moves and ploys that he had predicted in the possible battles to come. What remained was whether another path existed, one that did not appear readily, that Zama had not considered. Thought had gone into this counterattack, and currently any race would be lost. Perhaps he had pushed in too far too quickly.

Opening his eyes, Hikaru began to study the board, searching for the route to salvation. There were many to choose from, but so many led to nothing but oblivion. What would Akira do if he were playing? Was it possible, could he play it right and hold his offensive while defending the upper edge and feinting the upper left, or better still capturing it without being outflanked on the right side of the board? Yes, he could, but it'd require Zama not to see it coming until the very end. If he took his time to protect in the corner before Hikaru could attack then he could deflect the invasion off enough to avoid defeat; at least with the move order Hikaru would need to use.

Ka-Chi.

Shfffft.

It was intriguing really as the winner of this complex battle would likely win the game. If Hikaru could endure and overcome this intricate conundrum then his position would not change, but the same was true should Zama prevail. He'd have to see though, would Hikaru pay for his timid play in the beginning or would he overcome yet another opponent to keep his streak alive?

The open fan suggested however that Hikaru had found a way. Either hiding his face to keep from revealing his intentions or as an attempt to intimidate and thus cause an error from Zama, the fan meant that Hikaru saw something that he didn't want Zama to notice. Zama though had never witnessed a match by Hikaru, he would not be aware of the unusual nature of his event. Would that help him in that he might not feel as if Hikaru were trying to mock him, or would it defeat him by failing to catch the warning? He'd soon see it.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Hikaru felt his heart soar as the tension in the air seemed to lift and thicken simultaneously. He'd been able to reach the attack in the upper left, and now barring a mistake he ought to be able to survive. A gasp off to his left told him that it had come as a surprise to someone, and as Hikaru gazed over the top of his fan at his opponent he could see that it had not just surprised that one observer.

Chewing on his fan as he stared at the corner, sweat forming on his temples, Zama certainly looked as if he was in something of a panic. Not that Hikaru was surprised, with him adding another front to an already complicated battle after all. Zama could play wherever he wanted now, it would not matter. His first move of course would be to secure the corner and then Hikaru could move to invade again. Once he connected to his position in the lower left it would all be over, and from the look on his face Zama knew it.

Ka-Chi.

Yes, just as he'd planned. A few more moves ought to be enough to force a resignation, and if he decided to play through to the end it ought to be a good fifteen-point victory.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi.

So he was going to play it out to the end then. Well it would certainly be annoying but in three more moves it would be over. He'd done it, he'd overcome yet another titleholder. Four down and Akira to go.

Ka-Chi.

Snapping the fan shut to reveal an expression of utter shock, Hikaru stared down at the board. He was attacking his position there? He was making a late fifth front, a pincer with his stones on the left edge of the board. While Hikaru had never expected to hold that edge, losing his position there now would cost him big, ten points at least. It hadn't been possible until Zama's last move, one that Hikaru had foreseen in the race to connect his stones. He'd have to respond, but then that would…

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

Ka-Chi. Ka-Chi.

That was it, the extra turn had meant everything. White had been separated. Akira had been right and he had been unprepared for it. Zama Oza truly was not someone who could be defeated on the first try.

Exhaling deeply Hikaru placed his hands on his thighs and bowed his head, his eyes taking one last glance at the board. _Glow._ Nothing came, there was nothing left to do, no miracle move to beat the odds this time. "I resign."

A smug smile slid across the face of the Oza before he too lowered his head to thank Hikaru for the match. As Hikaru's head remained lowered, his frustration setting in at his oversight he heard from across the board. "Not bad Shindo, I can see why Ogata lost. Perhaps next time you'll be ready for me."

At those words Hikaru's head lifted to watch as his opponent rose from his seat and made his way toward the door, fan in hand. As he turned down the hallway Zama gave a light chuckle. Yes, that boy was certainly strong, creative too. Maybe he shouldn't have said anything though, giving a boy like that a compliment… his ego was likely big enough as it was. After all, there was already one annoying brat running around the top players in Akira Toya, no need to help create a second brat.

Shrugging at that, Zama gave a slight grin. Oh well, it was a nice thing to do, the papers would certainly like it, and it'd give the fans something to talk about. 'Oza acknowledges young star'. Yes, that was what people wanted to see, and in this business it never hurt to make the fans happy, especially when it cost him nothing. _Yes, it's good to be the Oza._


	40. Who is Fujiwara?

**Chapter 40: Who is Fujiwara?**

Fujiwara's eyes lingered on the goban.

"Are you familiar with this game?" Ogata asked, referring to Go in general. It was possible Fujiwara was just staring because the goban was really the only interesting object in the room.

"It seems familiar somehow..." Fujiwara gave a small, helpless shrug.

"Well, I'm sure things will start coming back to you soon. I'll be in my study if you need anything. I'll wake you up in three hours to check on you, just to make sure you're doing okay." That was standard procedure for treating head injury victims at home: wake them up at frequent intervals to make certain they haven't lapsed into unconsciousnesses.

"I apologize for the-" Fujiwara began, but Ogata cut him off with a wave.

"Don't worry. Get some rest."

As he left the room, Ogata glanced back. Fujiwara looked small and forlorn somehow, curled up on the couch under the blanket. He was still staring at the goban, as if it contained his missing memories.

Instead of researching Kurata's kifu, Ogata found himself surfing Internet medical sites. The information he'd dug up on amnesia wasn't very conclusive because the degree of severity and duration of amnesia varied wildly, and medical experts disagreed about the best form of treatment for it. Apparently, near-drowning could also be a cause of amnesia because the brain started suffering from oxygen deprivation after about three minutes of no air. However, motor skill impairment was far more likely than amnesia.

A glance at his computer's clock showed that about two hours had passed. Ogata decided to go ahead and check on Fujiwara. As he drew close to the living room, he realized the lamp by the couch was still on. Silently, Ogata moved into the doorway and paused.

Fujiwara's head was bent over the goban, his hair spilling onto its edges. A black stone hovered in the air, held expertly with exceptional elegance between his index and middle fingers.

Clack. After a long moment's deliberation, Fujiwara placed the stone somewhere in the upper left quadrant. That was the section, Ogata recalled, where the death of a group of key black stones had become certain. Kurata, who had been playing White, had set the cunning trap in play about fifteen moves earlier, and his opponent had resigned after realizing there was no foreseeable way for him to escape.

Yet Ogata's instincts had told him that there was a way for Black to survive, but the path remained frustratingly hidden to him, hovering just beyond the edge of his perception. It was wholly improbable, Ogata reminded himself, to imagine that Fujiwara had found that path when he himself couldn't, but Ogata couldn't help but slow his breath as he padded quietly across the room. Something about the expression on Fujiwara's face had snared his attention. Intensity. An intensity so strong it was almost palpable. Was Fujiwara one of those hard-core amateurs, or perhaps one of the more talented Net-Go players?

Clack. Clack. Clack. The stones clicked into place quickly now that the first had been laid. Black's path to survival glittered like an onyx serpent, twisting in a pattern Ogata had never fathomed. Ogata's heart thudded in his chest as the brilliance of the moves sunk in; with this play, Black could not only live but tip the balance of the entire game. But surely, Fujiwara simply happened to be familiar with a very similar scenario; perhaps some professional kifu had been uploaded to the Internet and Fujiwara had just recognized that he could apply the play to this specific game. There was just no feasible way that a non-pro could be capable of such a level of play.

Then Fujiwara looked up, his expression of surprise quickly mutating into guilt. "Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to mess with your game! I'll put it back just like it was!"

Ogata grabbed Fujiwara's wrist before he could remove the offending stones and Fujiwara blinked at the contact, wide-eyed. Ogata stared at the board, releasing Fujiwara's hand only when he'd committed the pattern to memory.

Fujiwara began reiterating his apology, but Ogata ignored him, instead studying Fujiwara's face as if he could read its secrets like he would a board. Then Ogata swept the goban clean, and placed it on the floor, settling himself cross-legged style in front of the board. "Play a game with me." It wasn't a request.

Fujiwara stared at him, then a small smile flitted across his lips. He slid off the couch, fan in hand, and settled on the opposite side of the goban, folding his legs under himself neatly.

Ogata did not offer Fujiwara a handicap but instead wordlessly passed him the goke with the black stones. "Onegaishimasu."

"Onegaishimasu." Fujiwara returned the bow, then deftly snapped a black stone onto a star point.

Ogata answered with a white stone on another star point.

They continued in this manner for a few moves, claiming key points of territory swiftly. Solid play but nothing extraordinary, any player of intermediate skill knew what the key positions were. But now came the test of ability.

Fujiwara's almond-shaped eyes narrowed, and he snapped his fan open, hovering it in front of his mouth before placing the next stone in Ogata's territory with a decisive clack.

Ogata stroked his chin appraisingly. Not a bad move.

Several exchanges later, Ogata felt his pulse begin to accelerate: Fujiwara's stones were taking shape. The emerging patterns stirred Ogata's memory, a thrill shooting up his spine as he felt like he'd seen this style of play before. Tell me who you are, Ogata commanded silently, maneuvering his stones to swiftly sever intruding Black's life.

I don't know, said Fujiwara's honest eyes. But his escaping stones whispered, You know, you know it in your bones, in your blood, in every part of you that loves Go.

Sweat beaded on Ogata's forehead as he focused on yet another breach of his territory. The breach was elegant, executed with subtle plays so it would be overlooked in favor of more obvious threats. He'd caught it early, but he could see how it would have spread like poisonous creepers had it been left unchecked just a hand or two more. Ogata strengthened his presence in Fujiwara's sphere of influence, forming an attack that struck with the force of a brutal, unavoidable spearing. Who are you, an unknown who exchanges equal blows with the Juudan?

Fujiwara tapped the folded fan against pursed lips, considering the damage.

Ogata allowed himself a small smirk as Fujiwara's pause stretched into minutes. It was a particularly insightful attack on his part, the caliber of play that had granted him long-desired victory over Touya Meijin. Yet deep inside, he felt a small, traitorous twinge of disappointment. You can't beat him. Even though there's no escape, he'd find one. He'd make one.

Finally Black answered, and Ogata let a small breath of air escape, readying his next play. Fujiwara's was a decent move, one that would stem Black's losses, but not enough to recover from White's vicious attack. Fujiwara was quite gifted, no doubt, and he must have certainly studied thatplayer online, but he wasn't-

Ogata froze, his vision nearly blurring from shock as a second pattern emerged from the board like a phantom rising out of a fog, a pattern that encompassed nearly the entire board in its influence. That single black move had breathed life into Fujiwara's stones and death into his. Ogata grasped his knees tightly with trembling hands; he'd been confident that he'd been reading the game deeply. But Fujiwara had read it down to its skeleton. How... ?

Tell me who you are. And Ogata looked up, shock filled his eyes. _Just who are you?_

Fujiwara's face was gentle in victory, glowing with accomplishment, the beautiful smile indicating pride in game well-played on both sides. But his eyes were deep and unknowable as Go itself, years of experience peering out from a young man's body. Ogata was overwhelmed, overwhelmed by the game and overwhelmed by that person sitting at the other side of his Go band.

 _WHO ARE YOU?!_

 _###_

 _ **Note**_ _: You may have noted by now, that for this part of plot, I use_ _Ontogenesis_ _'s "Desynchronization". I love this story at lot - it actually comes the closest to my dream end! Much thank to_ _Ontogenesis_ _to have created this beautiful fanfiction!_

 _But then, again, I've made changes that I needed for my plot. It won't be 100% the same as Desynchronization. In this story, it took a little bit longer than in "_ Desynchronization _" for Ogata to recognise who Sai was. Enjoy!_


	41. The Silence before the Storm

**Chapter 41: The Silence before the Storm**

Kneeling down next to the timekeeper, Akira watched on as the match continued to play out. Off to his left Amano sat taking notes, but that wasn't a concern of Akira's, it was the match before him.

Kurata had come out strong from what he could tell from the game record, but Kuwabara had pushed back along the left side to make it a game, and now the pair were entering the endgame. Soon it would become apparent just how important his match against Hikaru would become, not that the pair had ever needed a reason to go for the jugular off the bat before. Still, Akira needed to win in order for him to remain in the Kisei League, well unless Ichiryu and Kuwabara both lost, which was possible. Hikaru though, unless Kuwabara won he had no real reason to play except for the desire to defeat Akira, and while the idea of defeating Akira might very well have been more desirable to Hikaru than winning the Kisei title, extra motivation rarely hurt. Still, the idea of playing Hikaru with the advancement to the Kisei League Challenger on the line for Hikaru… it was quite exhilarating.

Motion at the door pulled Akira's eyes from the game as he watched his rival quietly enter the room and take a seat off by Akira's right. As he did so Hikaru stole a glance over at Akira and their eyes met causing both to smile. So Hikaru had won his match, he'd made it into the Tengen Main Tournament.

So Akira had defeated Mizuguchi 9 – Dan and made it into the Tengen Main Tournament. Suppressing a chuckle as he moved his eyes over to the board, Hikaru just grinned. The look in Akira's eyes, it had told him everything, so once more the pair would both appear in a main tournament. First the Hokuto Cup, then the Kisei League, and now the Tengen Main Tournament, it was going to be great; it was a shame Waya couldn't have made it as well.

Calculating quickly, Hikaru blinked at the complexity of the match. Granted it was the endgame, but the position was complicated, hard enough to calculate even if he'd been watching the whole time. From the look of it though the match might be ending before he could finish figuring that out, the endgame nearly over now and both players making their last few moves quicker now.

A Kurata's lost would remove him from competition in the league, leaving only the challenge of facing Akira once more. That was the way it was, the cost of losing just one match. Some might say it was unfair, but then in the Go world one didn't ask for charity or sympathy, a player was only as good as the Go they played. If Kurata won then it just meant that Hikaru had not been good enough, nothing more. Still, the idea of playing Akira with the chance to advance to the Kisei League Challenger on the line… it was quite the rush.

Kuwabara's stone hit the board and that was it, the game had ended. The room seemed to shrink as observers leaned in to try and see who had come out victorious, but Hikaru had already caught up with the calculation, a one and a half point margin of victory. Exhaling, Hikaru lowered his head somberly, eyes closed.

Meanwhile Amano had begun to crawl up a little bit as the players continued shifting stones to determine the victor. As they finished Amano began counting, Black 60 points, White 56 points. With komi White had won by a point and a half. So that meant…

A strong tension suddenly seemed to grasp Amano from behind, filling the air like a storm cloud. The others in the room seemed to be feeling it too as heads began to shift to look back by the scorer's table. As Amano joined them he felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up as Hikaru's head lifted, a taut, sober expression covering his face and turning with an electric inferno raging in his eyes toward his rival. Akira's face was equally calm and taut, but the icy glare with a charge of lightning behind it met Hikaru's gaze and the room almost seemed to be engulfed in a feeling of spine-tingling anticipation.

Struggling to grip his pencil through the sweat forming in his palms Amano couldn't help but grin. These two, they'd decide it all right here and now if allowed. What passion, it surely was going to be a showdown to remember, even more now that the decision of who would advance to the Kisei Challenger now rested with these two sixteen year olds. And like these boys, Amano couldn't wait.

###

"Shindo-sensei, could I please have your autograph?"

A sudden commotion occurred around him at those words as several others suddenly began to make their way over toward him saying things like, "What, Shindo-sensei is signing autographs?" or "Oh, I want an autograph too!" or "Shindo-sensei, sign this one for me and this one for my son, he wants to be just like you!" Then there was the one that sent a cringe through Hikaru's body. "Hey everyone, Shindo-sensei is signing autographs!"

A twisting sensation plunged deep into Hikaru's gut as those words echoed up the stairs to the 2nd Floor. Glancing over toward Honda expecting the annoyed glare that accompanied Waya at times like this, Hikaru instead just saw a somber, passive expression across Honda's face. Honda then added, "I'll let you go, see you on Saturday."

Panicking even more now as Honda began moving away, abandoning him to these wolves, Hikaru called out, "Honda wait!"

Turning to look back Honda just stared at him as more people moved passed him toward Hikaru. Fearing the prospect of being overwhelmed before he could reply, Hikaru shouted out, "Wait for me across the street at that restaurant we all eat at! I'll be there in a minute…" Glancing around he amended, "Make that a few minutes!"

From beyond the crowd Hikaru heard Honda's acknowledgement, and with that he sighed in relief. Sadly that relief was quite short-lived as his surroundings became all the more crowded, paper and pens shoved toward him eagerly. "Ok already, stop it! Let me get to somewhere that I can actually write!" The crowd parting as Hikaru began to make his way over to a counter, the Go prodigy sighed, his resignation given. He'd just have to surrender and accept his fate. Damn it, at this rate he'd become just like Kurata.

###

"Goodbye Mr. Kitajima, please come again."

Turning back to look over the Go Salon in front of her, Hirumi Ichikawa sighed as her eyes found their way to the back of the Salon. Sitting there with the same focused expression on his face as he'd shown every day for the last two weeks, was Akira. Staring down at that Go board hour after hour, day after day, occasionally placing a stone here or there as he looked into its depths. Words of Hikaru at the Waya's party kept swirling in his mind, but he fought to keep them down. _He said he'd play thousands of games with me, until we're sixty and beyond. What did he mean by that? Could it really be all about Go? No! I can't be distracted now. To be Hikaru's worthy rival in this whole life time, I have to show him in every match that worthy I am._

Heading over to grab the teapot, Hirumi sighed once more. Hirumi had watched Akira grow up, seen his development as a player and a person for so long, and yet never once had she seen Akira show that sort of passion or determination for anyone else. It was Hikaru Shindo and Hikaru Shindo alone that spurred him on, woke the passion in his soul and drove him to attain mastery over that board and its corresponding stones. And here he was, calmly prepare for the storm to come. A storm he had always been longing for.


	42. The Juudan's Muse

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 42: The Juudan's Muse**

"It was another beautiful game," Fujiwara breathed, after Ogata had surrendered. "Ogata-san, I'm honored that you asked me to play games. Should I be calling you Ogata-sensei instead, since you're a professional? I'm sorry, I'm not sure of the procedure! Please don't be offended!"

Ogata managed to pry his eyes off the board to stare at Fujiwara in utter bewilderment as the man continued to gush about the game and wave his fan at certain stones. The man had just beaten him by two moku, yet Fujiwara was rambling on about whether or not he should be called "sensei." At the title-holder level, half a moku wins were not uncommon, so a two moku loss was basically considered a trouncing - not a fluke or luck. Didn't Fujiwara realize that? Ogata entertained the idea that Fujiwara was very slyly mocking him, until he noticed a suspicious dampness glittering in Fujiwara's eyes. His opponent was crying from sheer happiness.

Ogata wordlessly handed Fujiwara a tissue, then took a moment to compose himself and collect his thoughts. First, he'd found this man. Then he'd taken him home. He'd played him and was crushed by him. Now this man was crying. Which was apparently a good thing because he was crying from happiness, not because Ogata had played a really bad game. No, the game hadn't been bad at all, Ogata conceded, glancing at the board again. Confronted with the brilliance of his opponent, he'd been forced to try a new tactic he'd never used before. Playing this man for just one game, Ogata could feel a new fountain of energy resurrecting inside him. He had awakened him, breathed a new life into his Go There was no doubt in Ogata's mind: **_this man was his muse_**. Why God gave him this fortune, Ogata could not yet decipher.

"Is something wrong, Ogata-sensei?" Fujiwara had finally noticed his thougtfullness and was now staring at him, fine brows furrowed in concern.

"No, I'm fine. And please don't call me 'sensei'," Ogata said, removing his glasses so he could wipe the perspiration from his forehead. "Exellent game. Obviously you haven't forgotten how to play go. You routed me rather completely," Ogata said frankly with a dry smile, replacing his glasses. "If you don't mind my asking, what exactly are you remembering now?"

"Just games. Hundreds of them. I don't remember the context or time or even my opponents, just the moves and the arrangements of the stones." Fujiwara looked down at the ruined fan in his hands, turning it over and over. "I wonder what that says about me, that I can remember games down to the stone but can't even remember a single face."

"I'm sure it's just a result of however you hit your head or injured yourself. The brain reacts in strange way to injury. It's not a reflection on you personally."

"But you have to admit, it is a little odd that I don't even remember my family but I have no problem remembering that a small keima works best in this situation here." Fujiwara gestured towards the goban, his voice wavering slightly. There was absolutely no trace of that incongruous and ancient presence Ogata had sensed during the game; Fujiwara looked just like what he was: a young man, lost and confused.

Ogata experienced a sudden urge to give Fujiwara a consoling touch on the shoulder or hand, but he shook it off. He was hardly the sort of person who went around doling out pats like a doddering grandmother, and certainly not to a beautiful man he'd be trying to seduce, given normal circumstances. "I don't think it's that odd at all," Ogata said reassuringly, in lieu of touching. "Your level of skill suggests that you've spent a lot of time playing go. So maybe it's why go is the first thing you've remembered – it doesn't mean it will be the only thing you remember."

Fujiwara gave Ogata a tiny, uncertain smile that said he knew Ogata was just guessing to make him feel better, but that he appreciated the gesture all the same. "You said I'm skilled... do you think perhaps I'm a professional player as well?" Fujiwara ventured carefully.

"No, the professional world of go isn't a large one. I'd already be familiar with you if you were a professional," Ogata said with conviction.

Fujiwara looked crestfallen, and Ogata assured him he could check with the Go Associations in Kansai and Western Japan, just to make certain that they weren't missing any go players. Maybe, Ogata thought privately, Fujiwara had decided to become an insei after realizing how easily he was dominating his opponents, who knows.

Immediately, Fujiwara's face brightened. "Thank you very much, Ogata-sensei. I'm afraid I haven't got many ideas myself about what I should do next, since I don't remember enough yet. Earlier, you had mentioned that I should go to a doctor and get a 'scan' done. Would this 'scan' help me find my memories?"

Ogata knew he ought to be very worried that apparently Fujiwara hadn't retained even a basic grasp of modern technology. But there was something almost... cute about the way he was phrasing his question, completely earnest and serious. Ogata bit the inside of his lip because laughing just wouldn't be appropriate in this situation. "The scan can't 'find your memories' directly. But if you sustained an injury to your brain, then a scan can help the doctor detect the injury and possibly treat it. If you'd like, I'll take you to my family doctor first, and then she might recommend you to a specialist, probably a neurologist."

Fujiwara nodded sagely. "Ah, so the neurologist is a memory specialist. I think that would be a good idea."

"I have a free schedule tomorrow, so I'll bring you there." Tomorrow would be the last match of the Kisei challenger tournament – Shindous vs. Touya. Ogata had intended to watch the match, but given he's having Sai right here in his reach, the two kids combined still couldn't compete. "Why don't you try to get some sleep now?"

"Can't we play just one more game?" The look that Fujiwara gave Ogata then could only be described as impish and wheedling. And possibly illegal. It was wrong for a grown man to be able to pull off a look like that, Ogata groused to himself.

Fujiwara got his game.


	43. One Heartbeat away

**Chapter 43: One Heartbeat away**

"Kuwabara-sensei, it has been a long time."

Motioning for Kuwabara to join him at his seat on the patio looking out into the garden in the backyard, Koyo Toya smiled contently. It truly had been a long time since the pair had talked, since before his retirement in fact.

Taking his seat on the patio, feet resting on the steps up from the garden, Kuwabara cackled lightly and answered, "Yes well you've been quite busy for a retired man, hopefully its not putting any strain on your body."

His smile widening to a knowing grin, Koyo answered, "No, I find the traveling quite enjoyable actually, quite relaxing. I'm more worried about you Kuwabara-sensei, traveling that grueling pro schedule at your age and all. One might worry that you're a heartbeat away from your last."

Laughing heartily at that as he reached for his cigarette pack, holding up from removing one until he was given a permitting nod from the former Meijin, Kuwabara lit his cigarette, took a puff from it and responded, "True I'm not as young as I once was, neither of us are, but I think I still have a few more years left in me. Besides, you're the one who had the heart problems, so everyone of course worries about you still, especially with your oversea ventures. By the way, congratulations on winning the Samsung Cup!"

Nodding, Koyo replied modestly, "Thank you, I was quite fortunate in that tournament, it was quite demanding." Turning his eyes away from the garden for a moment to glance at the Honinbo next to him Koyo added, "But I'm certain that you didn't come here to talk about my heroics in the Samsung Cup. Should I assume this has to do with tomorrow then?"

Chuckling lightly, Kuwabara answered, "Sharp as always Meijin. Yes, those two, quite an interesting pair don't you think?"

Returning his gaze to the garden Koyo sighed. "There's no need to call me that anymore, I am very much retired."

"Yes, quite true," Kuwabara replied, "But you're still the Meijin, honorary or otherwise. Besides, this old geezer is stuck in his ways. You avoided my question though."

Shrugging as he knew it was impossible to argue with Kuwabara about such things, Koyo answered, "Yes, yes they are. Akira has been quite determined about it, as I assume Shindo has been as well."

"Speaking of whom, where is your son?"

"Likely he is still at the Go Salon studying game records in preparation for his match tomorrow."

Cocking an eyebrow, Kuwabara inquired, "That seems strange. I would have thought that he would have wanted to study here where he could get your thoughts, don't you think Meijin?"

" Akira will not ask for my help because this is a personal battle that he feels obligated to overcome alone, to face Hikaru Shindo on his own, stand before him with fear in his heart and resolve in his mind. In that way I am very proud of my son."

Chuckling again, Kuwabara leaned forward slightly and cocked his head toward the former Meijin. "So then it ought to be a true clash tomorrow huh? Sounds interesting to me. I suppose the location should make it even more fitting for such a battle don't you agree?"

Now it was Koyo's turn to chuckle. The Go Association had decided to move the location of the match to the Yugen no Ma as it would be easier to hook up the internet feed from there, plus given the number of pros they expected to show up, the decision had been made. At least, that was what Akira had been told, although Koyo had his own ideas. "I don't think the location will matter to those two one bit once the first stone is played."

"Heh, you're probably right, even having played them myself I have a hard time thinking of what a match between those two young upstarts would look like. You haven't really played Shindo yet have you?"

Glancing at his old friend and former rival, Koyo answered, "I thought you had been at the Shinshodan match when I'd played against Hikaru Shindo."

Cackling loudly, Kuwabara stared Koyo down with his one eye and a grin on his face. "Yes, but we both know that wasn't a real match, not with that _handicap_ and all."

Koyo just grunted, so Kuwabara had noticed that too. "That's true, but I doubt that game would have been a fair judge even if we had played it without any handicaps. I've taken a look over several of Shindo's games as of late, including his handy defeat of you Kuwabara-sensei."

Chuckling as the sun passed the horizon blanketing the sky into night, Kuwabara remarked, "Yes well, I can't win them all. These young players as of late, they give me a good feeling about the state of the Go world. It's too bad you had to retire Meijin, I think you'd have enjoyed this new wave your son and that kid Shindo are bringing on as well."

Lowering his head with a taut expression, Koyo gazed out at the garden stoically, feeling the cooling air around him. "Even if I'm no longer a pro, eventually I will have the opportunity to face those up and coming players with these hands. When, I do not know, but that is what I feel in my heart. As for Hikaru Shindo, I am even more certain that I will one day face him."

Nodding his head casually, Kuwabara exhaled causing a puff of smoke to exit his nostrils. That man, he could get so serious at times. "So Meijin, feel like making a wager on the outcome of the match then?"

Glancing over curiously at Kuwabara now, Koyo replied, "You wish me to bet on a game with my own son involved?"

Smirking mischievously, Kuwabara just shrugged. "Well I would think that would only make the bet more interesting now wouldn't it?"

Shrugging himself, Koyo answered calmly, "Very well, then I will bet on Shindo to win."

Cocking an eyebrow at this shocking occurrence, Kuwabara responded, "Interesting, taking Shindo over your own son? You surprise me Meijin."

"We both know that predicting who will win such an evenly matched game shouldn't have anything to do with who I am or am not related to, but on who is best suited to win."

Chuckling at that, Kuwabara shot back, "So then you think Shindo will win huh?"

With a voice devoid of emotion Koyo answered, "I never said I thought Shindo would win or lose, now did I?"

"Then why bet on the kid?"

Chuckling slightly, Koyo answered, "Because that was who you wanted to bet on, right Kuwabara-sensei?"

###

Sliding his arms into the sleeves of his blazer, Hikaru adjusted his tie and took one last glance in the mirror. Looking back at him was a young man with a stoic, determined expression and eyes that burned like phoenix flame. It had been six months since the last time he'd faced Akira in an official match, a long time to wait, but it was finally here.

As he turned to say goodbye to his mother Hikaru heard the phone ring off by the staircase and seeing that his mother was moving to get it simply waved goodbye instead, his fan held tightly in his hand, then stepped out the door into the sunlight. It was such a beautiful day, if not for the cold he'd likely have found it to be quite enjoyable, but as it was he'd best get going. Today wasn't about enjoying the sunshine, it was about facing his rival, fending off the intensity and reveling in the clash of wills. _Akira, I'm coming_.

As Hikaru turned to shut the door the sudden sound of a heavy object falling to the floor inside the house however drew his attention. Reopening the door and stepping inside, Hikaru stared in alarm as he saw his mother on her knees, phone held to her ear with trembling hands.

Then slowly her head turned to view her son, a grave expression on her face, and with a trembling lip said, "Hikaru… it's Grandpa… he's had a heart attack."


	44. More confusing Discoveries

**Chapter 44: More confusing Discoveries**

Ogata grinned in anticipation. He couldn't wait to play Fujiwara again, and now that he'd made Fujiwara's acquaintance, he'd certainly have plenty of opportunities to play Fujiwara in the future. Fujiwara probably lived somewhere in Tokyo, so it would be convenient for them to meet for games. Ogata just hoped Fujiwara didn't have an extremely demanding boss or a possessive partner. Non go-players were often rather intolerant of what they regarded as time "wasted" spent playing go; he'd broken up with more than a few girlfriends over that very issue. Then there was the one who'd thrown a handful of stones at him when he'd bluntly stated that he found go _far_ more interesting than her. (Ogata still maintained that she shouldn't have asked the question if she hadn't wanted an honest answer.) Still, as go-obsessed as Fujiwara was, he'd probably manage to make some time regardless of his personal circumstances.

Fujiwara was sitting on the couch, eyes still half-lid with drowsiness when Ogata rapped politely on the living room door's frame. Ogata handed him some clothes to change, and Fujiwara thanked Ogata with a blush and a stammer, his shy manner and expression bearing little resemblance to the intense player who'd dominated the goban earlier.

"After you take a shower, let's eat breakfast. We'll have some time before the appointment, so I was planning to replay some of my next opponent's games. I have an important match coming up at the end of this month, so if you wouldn't mind, I'd like your input."

Fujiwara's face lit up as if he'd just won the Japan Jumbo Draw. "Of course! If you think I'd be useful in helping you prepare, Sensei," he added deferentially.

"Definitely. And don't call me 'sensei'," Ogata said, half-heartedly this time. Fujiwara was beginning to remind him of his mother in that aspect, if she thought something was the "proper" thing to do, she'd continue doing it regardless of what you asked. She would just politely pretend not to hear you if you protested. Ogata thought her selective hearing was definitely one of her more useful skills, and he admired it when it wasn't driving him up the wall. One day, Ogata hoped she would bequeath that skill to him, so he could add to his arsenal in the on-going war against Kuwabara.

 _Soon, old man. Soon._

###

Fujiwara was the very picture of indignation, arms crossed, two pink spots staining his cheeks, nose upturned.

Ogata couldn't stop chuckling. The way Fujiwara was standing wasn't helping matters any.

"I don't see what is so terribly funny about what I said," Fujiwara said in clipped tones, sounding _severely_ tempted to say something impolite.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to make light of your condition, but... that's the first time I've ever heard anyone refer to a computer quite like that. Your description was just"-Ogata paused, searching for a diplomatic word that might mollify Fujiwara-" _unique_ ," he finished, aware that the apology was a little lacking.

Apparently Fujiwara thought so as well. He swatted his folded fan against his palm sharply, his violet eyes flashing dangerously. "'Unique' as in _weird_ , yes? Then _Sensei_ , please explain to me how you would describe this... 'computer' then."

 _Not as 'that box with players inside,' that's for certain,_ Ogata thought wryly. Fujiwara had gotten excited when he'd stepped inside the study and spotted the computer, and had proceeded to identify it in the most amusing of terms. His amnesia had definitely damaged his grasp of modern technology. During breakfast, Ogata had noticed that Fujiwara was watching him very carefully as he operated the microwave. Shortly afterwards, Fujiwara had cautiously approached the microwave to reheat his drink. There was something odd about the manner he had touched the microwave, with wariness yet not complete unfamiliarity, almost as if he had never actually operated one himself. Like he'd only seen microwaves on TV or something. Assuming that Fujiwara knew how to operate a television; Ogata wasn't quite ready to discount his latest outlandish theory, which was that the man had been raised in monastery with robe-clad, go-playing monks and no contact with the outside world.

Regardless, Fujiwara's pride was injured, and Ogata wanted his help. So he gave Fujiwara a concise explanation about the computer and the Internet along with a visual demonstration.

"Ah," Fujiwara said when Ogata finished, looking pacified. He pointed at the modem cable with his fan. "So if you take that cord out, then you can't talk to other players anymore."

"Precisely." Pleased, Ogata nodded. He hated explaining himself twice. Some go players' intelligence didn't extend beyond the goban (there was one notable Korean pro who hadn't bothered to learn to tie his shoes until his late teens), but obviously Fujiwara wasn't one of them. His fractured memory just meant he was lacking reference points for the time being. "Would you like to try?" Ogata stood up and gestured to the seat.

Fujiwara leaned forward, regarding the computer with a mixture of eagerness and caution, but then he remembered the sheaf of kifu Ogata had printed out. "No thank you, not right now. May we play go instead?"

"Of course." Ogata handed the kifu to Fujiwara. "These are my opponent's kifu. His name is Kurata Atsushi. He's a relatively young Pro, but talented, and we've played each other frequently so he's familiar with my style. I'd appreciate it if you would review these, then play a game with me the way you think _he_ would play it. I want to determine if there are weaknesses in my game that he could exploit."

"Mmm, yes." Fujiwara nodded absentmindedly, intent on the kifu as he sank to the floor, settling into seiza.

"After we're back from the hospital then, okay?"

The task Ogata had requested of Fujiwara was by no means a simple one; most players simply weren't capable of imitating another player's style for an entire game, but Ogata had little doubt that Fujiwara was quite capable of such a feat. Not after that second game. Ogata was well aware of the quirks and habits that manifested in his personal playing style, but they weren't "weaknesses" that could be exploited; Sensei had pounded any of those out _years_ ago. But by the time they'd reached mid-game, Ogata had been seized by a thrill of dread and admiration: Fujiwara was reacting to his moves with an uncanny accuracy, as if Fujiwara were reading his mind. Fujiwara had already assimilated some of Ogata's idiosyncrasies, and he was wielding that knowledge against Ogata with cunning. Not all of Ogata's plans, of course, but enough to give Fujiwara a lead which he easily maintained throughout yose.

###

Ogata was halfway through one edition of _National Geographic_ when Fujiwara and Dr. Kiyohara, a trusted friend of his family ,whom he had known since his childhood and, emerged from the back rooms.

"What are his chances of a complete recovery?" Ogata asked as soon they were inside of the examining room, well out of earshot.

"His amnesia is bad. Truly, shockingly bad. I've dealt with a few head injury cases during my practice, mind, but nothing on this level. You ought to have taken him to a hospital for a scan last night after realizing he couldn't even answer the most basic questions about himself." She fiddled with her cigarette. "But to be fair, I don't think it would have made a difference."

"What do you mean?"

"His amnesia, as far as I can determine, is not related to whatever accident he had in the canal. If he had drowned enough to damage his brain that severely, he'd almost certainly be displaying some signs of motor impairment. His lungs would have some sign of damage. But he said he didn't have any problems breathing last night, no coughing, no wheezing."

Ogata nodded. "His voice was hoarse, but that was it."

Dr. Kiyohara blew out more smoke. "Then there's the question of how he ended up in the canal in the first place. Most drowning accident victims are children – the parents forget to lock the gate to the pool, or Junior decides that dunking his head in a bucket of water would be really fun. The next vulnerable group is young males, teens to early twenties. Usually, alcohol or drugs are involved. Or some sort of water sport, like diving off cliffs. But if he'd injured himself in a sport, he'd certainly have detectable injuries like broken bones or bruising. He said he wasn't drinking either, and he seemed puzzled when I asked him about drug usage."

"He wasn't high or drunk when I found him last night," Ogata said. "I wouldn't have let him get in my car if he had been."

Dr. Kiyohara waited before continuing, taking the time to cross her legs and adjust her chair. " I wonder from where he came. His posture, for starters. He carries himself like a prince; I didn't see him slouch once. He's also extremely polite; he was speaking to me in keigo the whole time. Most young people don't know keigo, but his is flawless. He's obviously been educated, as well-spoken as he is. Then there's that handwriting of his. I'm guessing a traditional family." Her lips quirked up. "Did you really think he was a woman at first?"

Ogata managed to maintain a cool gaze. "I told you his voice was hoarse. And some women have deep voices. Regardless, how does Fujiwara being from a 'traditional family' help matters any?"

The look Ogata received informed him that he was missing something painfully obvious. "His family probably filed a missing person report as soon as possible, maybe even hired a detective."

"He's an adult. What makes you think they would have notice? "

"That kind of parent notices," Dr. Kiyohara said decisively, "and I seriously doubt he lives by himself." Her expression became thoughtful. "You'd think that with that sort of amnesia, he'd be feeling just a teeny bit paranoid because he doesn't know _anybody_. How do you know who you can trust if you can't remember anything? But he's still open and friendly, didn't get defensive about any of my questions. That's the sort of trusting attitude that you only get when you've grown up sheltered and haven't been exposed to the 'real world.'" She shook her head. "Fujiwara-san seems bright enough, but he's not in the right state of mind to be making medical or legal decisions for himself. He needs a guardian. So take him to the police station. It shouldn't take them too long to search their records for missing young men with the last name Fujiwara. Mommy and Daddy can take him to his MRI appointment."

"I didn't think it would be necessary to involve the police. I had expected he would have started remembering things by now. Like where he lives."

"He's really not your problem, dear," the doctor replied. "Although the case itself is interesting. I'll definitely be interested in the results of that MRI scan."

The reluctance Ogata felt must have shown on his face because Dr. Kiyohara smirked and waved a teasing finger at him. "Ah-ha, so you _are_ attracted to him. I'll admit I was curious as to why you were taking such an interest in a complete stranger – you even lent him your clothes. Seiji, that's not like you at all! "

Ogata pinched at the bridge at his nose. "Oh, no, we're not 'involved.' But he does play go. Exeptionally good go."

"You're the Juudan. Coming from you, that's quite a compliment." The doctor arched an eyebrow. "If I know you, Seiji, you're caught up with thinking about how you can use him to improve your go. Which isn't a bad thing in itself, but the situation is more complex than go. You're dealing with a person who is vulnerable right now. I just don't want you to get involved in something... messy."

"I know. Thank you for your advice. I'll contact the police if he hasn't remembered anything by tomorrow," Ogata said, stubbing his cigarette out in an ashtray before getting to his feet.

"It's the best decision."

Dr. Kiyohara followed him to the waiting room where Fujiwara was listening intently to the receptionist chatter about the pictures of her children. Ogata paid the bill while Dr. Kiyohara made Fujiwara promise to play a game of go with her sometime. "I've heard you're quite talented," she said, and Fujiwara blushed and protested modestly.


	45. At Grandpa's Funeral

**Chapter 45: At Granda's Funeral**

Hikaru's body was trembling, at the mental stab that word caused his mind.

Dead.

It had such finality to it, an abrupt termination of all other things like a black hole sucking in everything around it. He'd used it so many times before, in casual conversation, in Go, but the word took on new dimensions now, the meaning he had once had for it shifting to another, far more sinister one. This was different from when Sai had left; he hadn't died, just simply disappeared. There was no body for him to look upon, causing memories joyful and precious to come flying into his mind, eliciting emotions that were strangely contradictory to the memory. Sai had disappeared, vanished into thin air, but that had always left the possibility that he might return one day. No such hope existed with Grandpa; he was dead, the finality as apparent as the proof that now lay in front of him.

It was so unfair. There was so much more he'd wanted to say to his grandfather, games he'd wanted to play with him, experiences to share. That was now impossible, the opportunity had been ripped away from him and it was so completely unfair. Grandpa had been such a help to Hikaru in the creation of his career as well as his understanding of life. He'd given him his goban, listened as he discussed his advancing career, encouraged him against his powerful opponents, even given him advice on his recent girl problems. And all Hikaru had ever done in return was to beat him into the ground with his play.

Emotions rushed through his body now, feeling as if it would pour out of him. Turning away, Hikaru paused a moment as he fought back tears. There was one more thing that, in a way, his grandfather had done for him in regards to his current position in life. Closing his fists tightly in an attempt to stop his body from shaking, Hikaru made his way off into the crowd of people.

###

The ceremony was held one day after. Waya recognized a few of the attenders, as they were Go Pros. Hikaru's popularity made his Granda's funeral sort of an event in the small Go world too. Waya saw Akira approaching him. "Waya-san, have you seen Shindou?"

"He went off that direction, but I don't know really to where."

As Akira made his way through the crowd of people glancing about for Hikaru, he unexpectedly collided with another gues, a girl his age in a simple black dress. "Forgive me, I wasn't looking."

Smiling brightly, Akira tilted his head ever so slightly and replied, "It's quite all right, no harm done. I should have been watching out as well."

A slight flush of embarrassment and awe covered Akari as she looked back at Hikaru's rival. Though she'd seen him numerous times before this was actually only the second time she'd actually spoken to Akira, and she'd forgotten how polite he could be. A far cry from Hikaru, but then there were other things that the two did share, as Akari could see the kindness in Akira's eyes that covered a sharp mental focus behind them. Regardless of his ability, Akari could certainly see just from that why Hikaru resonated with this person.

As she continued to study him, Akira continued, "Forgive me, but I've never been to this residence before, and don't know my way around too well, but do you know where Shindou might be?"

Nodding, Akari answered, "Oh, Touya-sensei! I was actually looking for Hikaru myself, so I'm afraid I can't help you much with that. I'm only vaguely familiar with this place myself, I haven't been here in years, not since…" Akari's voice trailed off as a thought crossed her mind. Yes, since _that_ day. Returning her attention to Akira she said, "Umm, Toya-sensei, I just remembered where you could find Hikaru."

A baffled expression covered Akira's face as he nodded and watched her head off further into the back yard. If nothing else, that had been… strange.

Reaching the entrance to the storage loft Akari's suspicions were confirmed as she found one half of the door slightly ajar. Opening it for a moment to enter herself before returning it to its slightly ajar position, Akari turned and took a deep breath, "Touya-sensei. I think Hikaru is upstair. You could go talk to him now. I'll do it later, I'll now go help taking care of things that I can".

###

Akira ascented up the ladder. As he reached the top a sound reached his forward slowly, following the footprints left in the dust on the floor Akira quickly spotted Hikaru who was kneeling down on the floor now, his body leaning over something. A few steps closer and Akira made out the shape of a Go board.

Then Akira noticed the color distortion on the surface of the board, splotches here and there that didn't coincide with the layer of dust resting on the board. Then that sound arose again and realization dawned on him, the splotches, they were tears, Hikaru's tears. In all the time he'd known him, Akira could not think of a time when he'd seen Hikaru actually overwhelmed with tears like this, but here he was now, most definitely crying. Stopping a few feet behind him, Akira knelt down and reaching out his hand said softly, "Shi…Hikaru?"

Hikaru's body shifted as he turned to look back at Akira, tears sliding down his cheeks, a forlorn expression on his face. In that state, he seemed so pitiful; not at all the formidable pillar of strength Akira was used to seeing. The way his body trembled, fear and shame rooted in his eyes, all of it spoke of a pain that Akira could only imagine. A slight hesitation came over Hikaru, passing a moment later as he replied, "Touya…"

He didn't need to say another word; everything was on his face. Seeing Hikaru like this, it was horrible, unnatural and completely against what he knew Hikaru to be. How Akira longed to remove his pain so that he never again would look or feel as he did now. It broke his heart.

Without warning Hikaru suddenly lunged forward and Akira found himself wrapped in a tight embrace as Hikaru began to cry even harder now into the fabric of his black kimono around his shoulder. His surprise lifting moments later, Akira reached out his arms to wrap around Hikaru's back, holding him close to his body. "It's all right Hikaru."

Through the sound of his tears Akira heard Hikaru mutter out as he shook his brow against his shoulder, "No, it's not. I did it, I killed him."

At those words Akira's brow contorted in confusion and anger. How could he blame himself for this, he hadn't been there. "It's not your fault Hikaru, it was just one of those things."

"No," Hikaru resisted, the pain quite apparent in his voice, "We used to play Go… I'd just crush him without mercy and… h-he always said that if I kept it up he'd have a heart attack… and now he… I didn't listen… I just thought… it's just like before and now he's gone! He encouraged me, helped me, and all I ever did was beat him into the ground until it killed him!"

Pushing Hikaru back off her shoulder, Akira gripped his face between his palms and said sternly, "Hikaru, listen to me. You are not responsible for what happened to your grandfather. It's not fair, and I know it seems hard, but your grandfather would be furious if he knew you were blaming yourself for this. It's not your fault, you couldn't have known this was going to happen. Do you understand me?"

Hiccuping as tears continued to flow, Hikaru answered, "But I-"

"NO!" Akira interjected, "No buts, or anything like that. It's not your fault."

Lowering his head as he moved a hand to wipe at his tears, Hikaru found his cheek leaning into Akira's shoulder, the pain easing ever so slightly. Whether Akira believed him or not Hikaru wasn't sure, but it did feel nice to hear someone say it, that it wasn't his fault. "I miss him so much Akira. I'll tell you the story…the whole story…Akira…"

Wrapping his arms around the back of Hikaru's head and pulling Hikaru tightly to himself, Akira heard himself murmuring, "it's okay now Hikaru, it's okay…I can wait. We have forever, don't you rememeber?" Akira's voice was so soothing, so Hikaru just closed his eyes and let go of the moment.

The shower of raining teardrops continued to fall as the pair sat there as minute after minute passed. As the storm began to lift from Hikaru's eyes he sniffed hard and muttered softly, "Grandpa… Sai…".

The two young pros sitting like that in silence. Not knowing how long it have passed. Not noticing, how a young girl with pigtailed hair arised from the stairs, saw them and quietly retreated.

###

 _ **Note**_ : _Oh no, poor Akari! I actually like her a lot in the manga. But I never noticed a chemistry between her and Hikaru. Well, actually, I never noticed ANY chemistry between Hikaru and anyone other than...you know whom ;)_


	46. A stayed-in Go Instructor

**Chapter 46: A stayed-in Go Instructor**

The police sergeant's frown deepened, and he leaned forward in his roller chair, placing his large hands on the desk. "It's not that we don't believe you, Fujiwara-san. It's just this is the first time a missing person has reported himself. Your situation is highly unusual. And I've been on the force for over twenty years, so that's saying something. The circumstances surrounding your injury are suspicious, too. Are you sure you don't recall any enemies, someone with a grudge or a score to settle?"

Fujiwara did not shift in his chair, but Ogata noticed the other man's fingers tighten around the fan in his lap. "No sir. I frankly can't imagine doing someone else harm. It does make me a little nervous to think I might have an enemy I don't remember, though."

The sergeant grunted and settled back into his chair with an air of faint disappointment. "Well, if you notice anything out of the ordinary – strange cars following you, prank phone calls, that sort of thing – be sure to contact this station. Regarding your efforts to find your family, it's possible that they have filed a report, but in another jurisdiction. I'll send your picture around the network and see if I can scare up any leads," the sergeant said, tapping the flash drive Ogata had given him. "If anything turns up, we'll contact you right away."

"Please do. Thank you very much for your help," Fujiwara said as he stood up, recognizing that the meeting had drawn to a close. He and Ogata exchanged bows with the sergeant before leaving his office.

"This sort of thing takes time. You just have to be patient," Ogata said in the car. "Anyway, you have that MRI scheduled tomorrow. Maybe that will be more useful."

"I suppose so, Sensei," Fujiwara said faintly, buckling his seatbelt. He didn't speak again as they drove down the freeway.

Fujiwara's downcast gaze bothered Ogata. In the short time he'd known the other man, Fujiwara had been quite upbeat overall, especially considering his situation. "I have some commitments today, so I'm going to drop you off at the apartment after lunch. But we could squeeze in a few rounds of speed go first, if you'd like."

The swiftness at which Fujiwara's expression lightened was impressive. "Speed go? That sounds like fun!"

Ogata smirked. "Well, if you haven't played it before, perhaps it will be more fun for me. I hope you're a graceful loser."

"I'm very graceful. Because I don't lose," Fujiwara replied promptly.

"Well, you seem to like trying new things, so maybe you'll enjoy losing."

"I think I'll enjoy beating you again more," Fujiwara said, sticking out his tongue, and Ogata chuckled. New things indeed: he'd never had a go instructor stick a tongue out at him. Not, Ogata hastily clarified to himself, that he particularly wanted to see Touya-sensei stick out his tongue.

###

"Ogata-sensei! That doctor's advice worked!" Fujiwara bounced over to the genkan where Ogata was removing his shoes.

"You mean Dr. Yamada's?"

Fujiwara nodded happily. "I was sitting in the garden, that one on the third floor. It's very relaxing, so I've been writing in my journal by the koi pond. Today while I was writing, your neighbor Chen Lian-san walked by and glanced at my journal. She said she was surprised I was writing in Chinese, and I said I didn't realize it was Chinese, that's just how I've always written my notes to myself." Fujiwara plucked a blue notebook off the breakfast table and flipped it open for Ogata. "See?"

The journal's page was covered with vertical rows of very stylized kanji. "You have a nice hand." Tiny, too. That nosy old woman must have been standing very close in order to spy over Fujiwara's shoulder, Ogata thought wryly.

"Thank you. It might seem a little odd, but I was writing about my fan, too." Fujiwara gestured to the ever-present fan, which was resting on the table between them. "I keep experiencing this feeling that I shouldn't have it, that in the past I had lost it, or given it to someone. Perhaps if I keep thinking about it, I'll recall something significant."

"That reminds me. I got a call from the police station today. They haven't turned up any leads," Ogata said gently.

Fujiwara looked down at the table. "I see. But I can't... keep imposing on your hospitality like this."

It had been nearly a week since Ogata had found the other man in the canal. During that time, Ogata had mulled over what course of action he would take in this situation. "Fujiwara-san, it's really not a problem for you to stay here while you're recovering. I have an extra bedroom that's just being used for storage. You're welcome to it."

"But I don't have a way to repay you now."

"Just keep playing go with me. It used to be common, actually, for a go instructor to live with his student. They still do it sometimes in Korea and China, I think. So I don't want you to worry yourself over it."

There was a loud, sniffling noise, and then suddenly a pair of arms wrapped around Ogata. Ogata's mind blanked as soft, damp skin pressed up against his face. Fujiwara's long eyelashes brushed across Ogata's cheek before he pulled away. "Ogata-sensei is so kind!" said the other man, wiping at the tears trickling down his face as he continued to sniffle.

"It's just a mutually beneficial arrangement," Ogata said faintly, relieved that Fujiwara was still too preoccupied with crying to have noticed that Ogata's face had gone red. He ought to have guessed that Fujiwara was the physically affectionate sort, as easily and unashamedly as the man showed his emotions. Not that Ogata minded touching, but usually he was the one initiating it. Fujiwara had caught him off guard.

Perhaps he might have to lay down some ground rules with Fujiwara, like **'no touching the student**.' It would be difficult to concentrate on go if he were distracted by thoughts of distinctly non-go-related activities. And Ogata didn't want to complicate matters unnecessarily: he could find acceptable partners easily, but a sensei of such caliber was a matter of once in a lifetime.

"Ah, I feel so much better." Fujiwara dabbed his face dry with his sleeve. "Let's play now!" he said with a coy smile.

Insatiable go-freak, Ogata thought fondly. Fujiwara had his priorities straight.


	47. Right here waiting

**Chapter 47: Right here waiting**

Sitting cross-legged on the floor of his bedroom, Hikaru leaned back slightly to rest against the side of his bed. Seconds slid by slowly, almost at a crawl before he finally closed his eyes and sighed heavily. It had been a bad game today, a match unlike himself in so many ways. His intensity, passion, even his desire to play had been absent, making the fact that he'd won the game seem even stranger.

This was not the first time he had felt badly about his game, and felt a lack of desire to play. It had occurred after Sai had left him too, but that time it had taken playing a game to find his mentor again within the lines and stones on the board. He had found Sai there within the stones he placed on the board, but now he was not searching for his friend and mentor, but rather for himself.

Grandpa's loss had been painful, and even in being able to say goodbye he'd struggled to let it simply pass on. Glancing over to the corner of his room Hikaru eyed the Go boards sitting there gathering dust ever since he'd placed them there two days ago; his inheritance. Apparently his grandfather had left instructions that Hikaru be given both his grandfather's own board along with Torajiro's board and several other items including a fair assortment of wall scrolls from his grandfather's packrat collection. However, Hikaru insisted on leaving Torajiro's board at the attic – he just felt it was where the board belonged.

"Hikaru!" his mother called from the bottom of the stairs, interrupting his thoughts, "you have a letter from the Go Association!"

Answering her, Hikaru scratched the back of his neck for a moment wondering what on earth it could be before he pulled himself to his feet. He'd already received the game schedule for the next several weeks, and while he wasn't on it again until the third week it seemed unlikely that a change had occurred. Then again, most other issues like teaching games and Go events were discussed over the phone or in person, leaving Hikaru clueless as to what it could have been.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, Hikaru tore open the envelope and removed the letter inside. As he began to read the short message on it Hikaru found his breath stop as his eyes widened slightly. A moment later however it was past as a slight smile slid over Hikaru's face. Well, it certainly made sense, and he had to admit that he probably should have been expecting this to happen. _Man, I wonder how the others will take it?_

 _###_

"Akira, how is Shindo doing?"

Turning to look at Hirumi, Akira answered solemnly, "I haven't seen or spoken with him since the wake, so I can't be certain. I think he's taken his grandfather's death pretty hard, and right now Go isn't on his mind for the first time in a long while."

His brow contorting, Hirose then asked, "But if you haven't talked to him, how can you be sure of that? It's understandable that Shindo-pro would be upset by it, but perhaps he's doing better now?"

Closing his eyes, and reopening them a moment later, Akira answered, "Because except for my game last week against Zama Oza, I have come here every day for the last week and a half and Shindou hasn't come here to see me once."

"But Young Master," Kitajima interjected, "how can you be sure that Shindo will come here when he's recovered from this?"

"That's because we haven't played our game yet. His grandfather's death may have interrupted it, but official or not, Hikaru and I will play that game when he's ready. I know this, and I'm certain he knows it in his heart too." Rising from his seat, Akira then said, "Please forgive me for not being able to play more, but I need to return to preparing for my Honinbo League match against Fujisawa-sensei on Thursday." With that Akira bowed and then turned and moved off toward the back of the Go Salon, a place he had been spending so much time as of late, studying alone. It pained Kitajima to say it, but he was beginning to miss Hikaru's visits, if only for the young master's sake.

Reaching an empty table in the back corner, Akira took his seat and slid the Go bowls to his side of the board . Akira had on and off considered going over to Hikaru's house to check up on him, but had rejected it. Hikaru was in a state of mourning, Akira was not sure if Hikaru would like himself to be seen in that state. Akira recalled the warmth of Hikaru's hands and body in his embrace, the heat of Hikaru's tears on his shoulder. Did this mean that their relationship had reached a new level, earned a new face, or was it only because of Hikaru's loss and sorrow?

Mindlessly, Akira reached into his pocket and found a small piece of paper. Opening it, Akira's eyes widened slightly as he realized that he had grabbed the wrong piece of paper off his desk at home. This wasn't Fujisawa's game record from his Game 4 Tengen Finals match against Nogi Tengen, it was the letter he'd recently received from the Go Association. He must have grabbed it by mistake, being in the hurry that he had been in the hopes that Hikaru might show up today. It was likely that Hikaru had received his own letter by now, if such a thing even mattered to him at the moment.

Still, unlike Hikaru's grandfather his own father had recovered so Akira really had no idea how long this might last, or in what state Hikaru would return. He had won his Fujitsu preliminary match, but the match had not been recorded so Akira had not been able to see how Hikaru's game had been affected. Whether his strategies had changed, his mental fortitude shaken, his game a mess, all these things Akira did not know, and until Hikaru was able to recover and stand before him once more, Akira would have to continue to wait. Still, time was moving forward, and Hikaru only had so long before he would have to stand tall again or fall by the wayside. Glancing down at the letter once more, Akira exhaled softly. _Come Hikaru, stand before me once more, let us play the game we both yearn to play_.


	48. Ogata's late Relization

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 48: Ogata's late Relization**

Ogata wondered what sort of person Fujiwara would become as he regained more of his memories. The other man was currently staring out of the window, watching the traffic and people passing by down the street with great interest. Almost certainly, Fujiwara wouldn't retain such a level of childlike fascination with the world. And for his own sake, Fujiwara hopefully wouldn't remain quite so naïve: the man still hadn't noticed any of the sidelong glances he'd been getting from some of the other passengers. Ogata had been expecting Fujiwara to draw attention – Tokyo had its fair share of colorful and odd natives, like all metropolitan cities – but a young, beautiful man with such long hair was still an anomaly. As intelligent as Fujiwara was, Ogata was beginning to suspect that the man was rather blissfully wrapped up in his own interpretation of the world. Fujiwara had taken to him quickly with little apparent reservation or wariness. Had Fujiwara always been such a trusting person, or was it a result of having no memories of negative experiences, no memories of betrayal, no memories of exactly how rotten humans could be? Somehow, Ogata suspected that if he himself were to lose his own memories, he'd become more suspicious, not less.

After getting a glass of water in the kitchen, Ogata walked into the living room.

Fujiwara had eschewed the couch again in favor of sitting in seiza in front of the balcony's sliding glass doors. He did not look up as Ogata settled onto the couch, completely focused on the recording paper in his hand, his pen moving deftly over the kifu without pause. Neat stacks of kifu were spread around his knees.

Remembering Dr. Yamada's advice, Ogata had encouraged Fujiwara to take time and record all the games he could rememberFujiwara had attacked the task with the same single-mindedness and tenacity that he approached his journaling with, spending hours writing move numbers in black and red ink. Apparently, Fujiwara's recall was flawless; he never hesitated while working on a kifu but maintained a steady, even pace. . Now Ogata squinted at the stacks, trying to estimate the number of kifu. There were probably at least a hundred kifu. He wondered how many more kifu Fujiwara would record. The first night they had played, Fujiwara had told him that he remembered "hundreds" of games. Ogata had assumed Fujiwara was simply speaking figuratively until Fujiwara's nonchalant demonstration of his photographic ability during the train ride. A seasoned pro could remember a few dozen games in their entirety, but then again, Fujiwara was hardly average.

With a rustle, Fujiwara turned the current kifu over and frowned at the blank back, tapping the pen against his lips. His eyes took on an unfocused cast, as if he were reaching deep into his memory for an elusive answer. Finally the other man gave a little sigh, and scratched a few characters onto the kifu before sorting it into the largest stack. Then Fujiwara picked up his fan and set it on his knees, turning his head towards the balcony, his expression pensive as he stared at the bright, flickering lights of Shinjuku's nightscape.

It wasn't the first time Fujiwara had been drawn into a reverie. Ogata had noticed that when Fujiwara fell silent like this, he became completely unaware of his surroundings or company, even if he'd been chattering away just a moment before. Such behavior would have normally annoyed Ogata, but he knew Fujiwara wasn't simply being inattentive. Not with that look on his face - a wistful, lost expression that was incongruous with his usual energetic and optimistic attitude. At these moments, Fujiwara seemed almost... breakable.

Ogata had never been comfortable handling things that shattered easily. So he simply watched as usual, waiting for Fujiwara to emerge from whatever melancholy had seized him. I can remember games down to the stone but can't even remember a single face, Fujiwara had said that first night. Perhaps Fujiwara had been trying to remember his opponent for that game he had just recorded.

Ogata wondered how many opponents those kifu on the floor represented, opponents with forgotten faces. For Fujiwara to have developed such strength, he must have played many opponents over the course of many years, which made it even more seemingly impossible for Fujiwara to exist as an unknown: where were all those opponents? His teacher or teachers? Why hadn't they come forward? Surely they'd have noticed his disappearance, and Ogata found it difficult to understand why his inquiries hadn't been met with even a single reply, or why the police investigation had turned up nothing. The world of go, after all, was one with an intricate network of connections.

Naturally, Ogata was intensely curious about the kifu, but Fujiwara had been oddly reluctant to share them. Whenever Fujiwara wasn't working on the recordings, he slid them back into clear files and tucked them away inside his room as if hoarding treasured photographs or love letters. "I'd rather wait until I can tell you about the games properly," Fujiwara had said apologetically, his eyes lowered as he clutched the clear files to his chest. Despite his disappointment, Ogata could understand that sentiment, wanting to have ownership over one's own memories. The kifu, after all, were the most direct link Fujiwara had to his past.

Ogata set his empty glass on the table with a clink, and Fujiwara turned at the noise with an exclamation. "Oh, I hope you haven't been sitting there long! I didn't notice you."

With a shrug, Ogata said, "I didn't want to interrupt you. But if you're finished for now, would you like to play a game?"

"Yes, of course!" Fujiwara spoke a little too quickly, as if he were desperate for a diversion from whatever he'd been brooding about.

Ogata placed the goban and goke on the floor, then snagged a pillow from the couch. He settled on the pillow cross-legged. Ogata loathed sitting in seiza because he'd never managed the trick of keeping his feet from falling painfully asleep, whereas Fujiwara seemed capable of holding the pose for hours with no visible discomfort.

Fujiwara won Black, so Ogata dedicated his early hands towards hindering Fujiwara's plans. Ogata had always possessed a tendency to play defensively during the beginning stages of the game, preferring to reserve his attacks for later stages when he had more of a framework to support him. (Not that he wouldn't attack early if a tempting opening invited it, but the only "tempting openings" Fujiwara played were invariably traps.)

Ogata furrowed his brow as Fujiwara skillfully danced around Ogata's protective moves to forge a vexing formation in Ogata's lower left corner. Always talented, Fujiwara particularly shone while playing Black because his play was naturally aggressive and able to fully capitalize on the advantage of first move. Ogata had only come to appreciate the level of Fujiwara's aggressiveness, however, after playing him repeatedly. His moves were elegant and always well-planned and executed, which belied the underlying risk-taking nature of his game. A Go game was comprised of hundreds of moves, so it was very difficult for aggressive players to avoid some sloppiness and occasional slip-ups over a course of an entire game, although the more skilled ones could capitalize on the pay-offs from their risks enough to balance out the mistakes.

Fujiwara did not make mistakes. None that Ogata had seen yet, and Ogata knew he was very good at spotting his opponents' mistakes. Yes, there were the occasional stones sacrificed and territory ceded, but the sacrifices usually made Fujiwara's position stronger. A game with Fujiwara always left Ogata a bit shaken and drained, as if he had been engaged in battle with an ancient, fearless warlord instead of his young, gentle instructor. Every ounce of Ogata's ability and strength had to be marshalled to keep Fujiwara from simply overrunning his territory.

Finally, Ogata decided to ignore the vexing formation in favor of an offensive attack against a key Black group. His instincts told him the group was spread thin, but Ogata laid his attack out carefully, keenly aware that "thinness" in Fujiwara's stones could translate to a flexibility which Fujiwara would instantly turn against Ogata if he erred. If defending his own territory required all Ogata's talent, then invading Fujiwara's required him to reach above what he knew his own natural limits were.

It was an absolutely exhilarating experience.

Ogata finished White's attack and looked across the board, where Fujiwara hovered his opened fan in front of his face. "Have I progressed much?"

Only Fujiwara's eyes, round with coyness, were visible. By now, Ogata knew Fujiwara's fan concealed a smile that was either proudly beaming at his student's good move, or curved in predatory anticipation of a vulnerable target. "Part of progression is being able to recognize the advancement of one's own abilities. What do you think?"

"Don't go all Socratean on me. I'm not interested in what I think," Ogata said, crossing his arms and glowering at the other man. He just knew that Fujiwara was laughing at him behind that fan by now.

Fujiwara picked up a stone and placed it into position in another area of the board, then he snapped his fan shut. He was smiling, and Ogata realized that Fujiwara was acknowledging the inevitable death of that Black group Ogata had attacked.

###

Ogata looked down on the Go board, studied that last stone. And right then, a lightning stroke his heart. He has found Fujiwara's style somewhat familiar, somewhat like Shindou's style with much more elegance and adequacy, or somewhat like Shuusaku… _as if Shuusaku learnt modern Go_ …

NO, IT CAN'T BE!

WHY THE HELL DID IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO SEE?!

FUJIWARA is…


	49. One night together

**Chapter 49: One night together**

Wrapping her fingers nervously around one another, Nase stood patiently in the plaza where she had arranged to meet up with Hikaru. While it was true that she had been the aggressor in this case by asking Hikaru to spend the day with her, quite frankly Nase had little idea as to what they should do together. She'd seen quite a few movies and TV shows about such happenings, and in fact those were the only real examples she had to work with, a scary proposition given that the dates in those scenes had ended with either one side rejecting the love of the other, or with a night in a hotel room.

The night in the hotel room of course didn't sound entirely bad, although Nase had to admit the idea of taking things that far tonight was more unnerving than the idea of spending the day with Hikaru and not knowing at all what to do. Besides, would Hikaru even be interested in doing something like… that?

Pulling her winter coat more tightly around her as she glanced up at the clock post, Nase began to glance around once more; it was the designated time. That's when a terrible thought hit her, even more unnerving than the previous thought of the hotel experience. What if Hikaru didn't show up? He was still quite upset about his grandfather's death, had been sulking even during their last study session, it was possible this had slipped his mind. But then, Nase heard a familiar voice right behind her back -

"Hey Nase, I made it!"

Nase turned and smiled warmly at Hikaru. He'd come. As he inquired how long she'd been waiting, Nase answered, "Oh not too long, I just got here a few minutes ago myself." She had lied through her teeth, as she'd been so nervously anxious that she'd shown up an hour early before realizing the time. Of course she felt silly now, having doubted him just now.

"Oh good," Hikaru responded, "I was worried I was late. I forgot what time we were supposed to meet up, and when I called your cell phone to find out I couldn't get through, so I just guessed. Man, I could have been like three hours late; guess I was lucky."

Nase's face paled as Hikaru said those words, her thoughts simulating what a three-hour wait might have been like. A moment later her hand shot to her purse, diving into it to pull out her cell phone. Flipping it open, Nase's eyes widened as she realized that she'd forgotten to charge it the night before; the battery was dead. "Well you're here now, so let's not worry about it, shall we get going?"

"Sure," Hikaru answered, "where to?"

A quiver ran through Nase's smile. She'd been afraid he'd say that, having hoped that Hikaru would take charge and suggest a location to go to. Then again, Hikaru likely was as inexperienced as she was in this area, as both of them had spent all the time they would have normally spent on learning about this sort of thing perfecting their games instead. What's more, Nase could still see Hikaru's eyes lightly soak with sorrow, he hadn't overcome his Grandpa's death yet and had no mind for…things like which restaurant to dine in.

Nase's mind flashing with ideas, mostly scenes from movies, Nase just shook her head and then with a smile said, "I don't know either. Hehe, ummm… how about we just go take a walk for now and think about it?"

Her goals had been skewed, thoughts about confessions of love, hot nights in hotel rooms and all that stuff seemed like selfish indulgences now; today could best be served in one way, in taking that forced smile of Hikaru's and turning it into a genuine one. Yes, she would do whatever she needed to get Hikaru to enjoy himself, to pull him out of this funk that he was now in and to return him to the Hikaru she knew so well. They just needed to have some fun, to find enjoyment and forget all the bad events of recent weeks.

Glancing up at the now darkening sky as the sun was now a sliver upon the horizon, Nase inhaled and closed her eyes. _Please, just let Hikaru be happy again. Let that be my winter's fairytale!_

 _###_

"Hey, great job Nase, you found us a table."

Making his way over with a pair of trays, Hikaru took the empty seat across from Nase and handed her one of the two, setting his own down in front of him. "There we go, one Chicken meal for each of us. Itadakimasu."

Watching on with a worrisome expression as Hikaru began to dig into his dinner, Nase focused in on his smile between bites. It was better than before, but it was still forced, a melancholy smile. She couldn't tell if Hikaru was having fun or just trying to act that way for her own sake.

"Shindou, what sort of things do you like doing?"

Glancing up now as he swallowed a piece of chicken, Hikaru answered, "We can do whatever you want Nase, I don't care."

"No," Nase replied, "I'm not… I'm just asking. All we ever do is study Go, but that's work for us both now. I just wanted to know what other things you enjoyed doing."

"Oh." Pausing a moment as his eyes drifted out the window to the streets outside, couples walking by arm in arm, Hikaru exhaled. "Wow, I don't know really. It's been awhile since I really just went out and did something by myself or with friends that didn't involve Go. I mean sure, the others and I meet up for lunch from time to time on non-game days, but really even then we usually talk Go. I mean…I go to Akira's family Go salon every week. We play, discuss the games and…well….fight? Yeah we fight each other quite often, but it's kind of fund, you know. Yeah…that's definitely fun! Since Granda's funeral I haven't been there though…I don't want Akira to see me like this…"

 _Akira? Did Shindou just use Touya's given name?_ Nase couldn't help wondering…

Smiling coyly, Nase replied "Yeah...I see…"

That hadn't helped much at all. The only thing she'd discovered was that Hikaru's life was just as smothered by Go … it must have seemed like Go was taking everything from him. She'd probably be doubting her desire to continue this road too after having all of that happen in such a short span of time.

What made it worse was that the one thing that Hikaru seemed to enjoy was particularly games with Touya. Of course the two _princes_ are rival and all…but…Then again, perhaps she was going about this the wrong way…

###

Making their way down the hallway of the Hotel Sieyo Ginza, Nase felt her face beginning to redden. This was quite the luxurious looking hotel; although given that they were in Ginza that wasn't completely surprising. It was the sort of place one might have thought to find a title match being played at. If Hikaru hadn't insisted on paying she doubted she could have afforded a room here. Then again, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to be here either.

Sure girls had fantasies, daydreams about doing such things, but to actually be doing this, it was rather unnerving. What sort of room might Hikaru have picked, one with a jacuzzi, or perhaps the honeymoon suite? A skylight perhaps to have the stars looking down upon them as they…

Shaking her head to banish those thoughts, Nase looked on as Hikaru began to make his way over to one of the doors, sliding in the key card to unlock the door. It seemed so close and yet far away. Once she moved through those doors that was it, they were staying here the night.

Following Hikaru as he entered the room, Nase shivered slightly in nervous fear and slight anticipation. This was going to be the first time she'd ever shared… two beds with someone? As the door closed behind her Nase stared in shock at the pair of beds in the room, separated by a nightstand, a lamp and phone set on top. Exhaling at the sight before her, Nase was so surprised it was hard to breathe: had Hikaru intentionally picked a bedroom with two beds or… _No, it couldn't be._ Nase shook her head. _This must have been some sort of misunderstanding with the reception._

Removing her jacket and setting it gently onto the cushioned chair to one side, Nase surveyed the room. A desk sat off to one side while a chest of drawers, likely for holding clothing for those with long stays, sat across from the twin beds. Beyond the beds another room, open save for the wall line, with a love seat adorned with pillows, several plants hanging from the ceiling. Between the two rooms sat a dining table with a pair of chairs, while off to the left of the two beds another door, likely to the bathroom, stood. It was truly a sight to see, and Nase had to admit that even being in this room made her feel unworthy.

A shiver of anticipation and fear ran down Nase's spine at the thought, causing a layer of sweat to form on her brow. Was Hikaru planning, hoping to confess his love to her and then consummate it? Glancing over at Hikaru who had moved to the other room now and seemed to be fidgeting with the remote control to something, pausing to glance over at her and give an exaggerated grin, Nase felt her cheeks flush. She needed to get out of here, she needed time to think before this went any further. Glancing about, she then spotted the doorway next to the beds. "Umm, Hikaru… I'm going to… take a shower… ok?"

"Sure, go ahead." Hikaru called from the next room.

Turning off the shower, Nase reached for the towel and a few minutes later, now completely dried save for the drops still latching onto her hair, pulled on her panties and slid into the white hotel robe hanging by the door. The robe was soft and clean, fluffy and warm. As she tied the belt, Nase brushed back her hair and exhaled. She had to admit, going out there wearing only this, it was kind of sexy.

Opening the door, Nase noted that the lights had been turned off, although the music still played in the background, much softer than before. Turning toward the beds, Nase spotted a shape underneath the covers of the far bed. Hikaru was already in bed waiting for her.

Gulping, Nase inhaled and began to make her way over around the bed. While technically she could have climbed over the bed, there was still enough light from the bathroom that Hikaru might have seen something from his view as she moved, and her modesty at the moment wouldn't have it.

Reaching the other side, Nase leaned over and said, "Umm, Shindou I-"

A loud guttural sound suddenly filled the air, and Nase took a step back, unsure of what it had been. Then it came again and Nase, half-shocked, suddenly realized what it was. Snoring, and it was coming from Hikaru. The idiot had fallen asleep. Staring down at him sleeping there silently for a moment, Nase then felt a slight giggle begin to form in her chest. Soon it had grown into a full giggle, verging on a laugh. It was just too funny, here she'd been tormenting herself over the possibility of sleeping with him, and here he was asleep already, not a care in the world.

"Sai….Sai! Granpa!...Akira! Come…to…me!...A-ki-ra!"

Her laughter ceasing at that. Did she hear it correct? Did he call Touya's name in his dream? Nase felt like her hear break into thousand pieces. _But I thought it's me whom…Why!?_

Outside, the snowflakes continued to softly fall.

###

 _ **Note**_ _: Yeah, sorry Nase, but it's not you whom...whatever. I enjoyed alternating this part of Leitbur's "The Never-ending road" a lot. I could only see Hikaru end up with one certain person...and I'll make it work, too! He he he ;)_


	50. A 7-Dan Amateur

_! Important: If this story reminds you of a different fanfiction you've read before, don't be surprised! Please read my Disclaimer (Chapter 1)_

 _###_

 **Chapter 50: A 7-Dan Amateur**

Waya snapped his cell phone shut. "Damnit," he muttered - under his breath of course - but the old lady in the seat across the car glared at Waya disapprovingly. Well, Waya had a good reason for being irritated: he'd just gotten an apologetic text from his student canceling their shidougo session, something about his boss dumping a last minute assignment on his desk. Although Waya completely understood (it wasn't as if Tanaka-san could just tell his demanding boss "no thanks"), it would have been nice to have received the text before he was almost at Shinjuku.

The Iwamoto Go Salon was a little inconvenient because of the distance from Shinjuku Station; it was about a fifteen-minute walk, but the inconvenience was actually in Waya's favor since he'd never seen any other professionals at the small salon. Waya didn't want to have to compete for students, not when he was still just a 3-dan and not yet well-known. to himself, it was nice to get to play teacher for a change.)

Waya pushed the door of the salon open, inhaling the familiar scent of cigarette smoke, wood polish, and brewing tea. Only about seven of the salon's twenty tables were occupied, most of the players chatting quietly as they placed their stones and mulled over their moves.

"Oh, good afternoon, Waya-sensei!" called the owner, a portly man with graying hair. He set a stack of worn books on the counter. "You're just in time. I've got a number of joseki books here that I've collected over the years. I'm thinking of setting up a little lending library in that corner over there. No sense in letting the books just collect dust in the backroom, after all. Would you mind taking a quick look and telling me if you'd recommend any of them?"

"Yes sir," Waya replied, taking the books. He already recognized some of the titles, so it wouldn't take much time to pick out a few that would be appropriate for the skill level of the average player in the salon. "I was wondering if anyone's interested in a teaching game today."

The owner wiped at his dusty hands with a damp cloth. "Oh, you usually come in with Tanaka-san, don't you? Guess the poor guy had to work overtime again." Then he shook his head. "No, I don't remember anyone asking for a lesson today, although that new fella over there's practically playing shidougo with Muramatsu-san." With a wink, the owner leaned across the counter to whisper conspiratorially. "Don't tell Muramatsu-san, though. I don't think he's caught on yet."

Waya followed the owner's line of sight to a corner table he hadn't noticed earlier. Muramatsu-san was sitting across from a tall man with the longest hair Waya had ever seen; it was almost touching the floor. Waya couldn't see the man's face since the man's back was facing him, but Waya knew there weren't any pros with hair that long, at least not at the Tokyo Go Association. So the new guy was giving free shidougo lessons – no wonder no one had asked for a paid lesson. "He's doing shidougo? May I ask what his ranking is?" Waya asked, careful to keep the traces of irritation out of his voice. Shidougo was an art; not just any idiot could do it. Waya had studied under Morishita-sensei for years before he even dared to try teaching shidougo himself.

"Well... we're not exactly sure." The owner held out a clipboard with the list of the day's customers, and tapped on an entry that had only "Fujiwara" written in an elegant hand. Someone else had scrawled "Amateur 7-dan?" in the ranking slot. "Fujiwara-san says he doesn't compete in events, so I know technically he can't have a 7-dan ranking, but I can't just put him down as a 1-kyuu. He's as strong as anyone I remember playing back when I competed as an amateur." The owner shook his head. "I'd heard young players keep getting stronger because of the Internet, but I had no idea how much. Fujiwara-san doesn't lose, even playing with a nine-stone handicap."

"That's pretty good," Waya said, just to be sociable. Winning with a large handicap wasn't necessarily as impressive as it sounded, depending on the skill level of one's opponents – and the average player in the Iwamoto Go salon just wasn't that good (although Waya wasn't stupid enough to say that aloud.) He himself had beaten casual players on the NetGo server with bigger handicaps than nine stones.

"Hey, why don't you play Fujiwara-san after he finishes that game? You can give him an official rank for me. And I bet he would love to play a realpro, too, since he said he just usually plays with his friends." With a large grin, the owner added, "Try not to play too rough, Waya-sensei," and returned to rummaging around the backroom.

"Of course." Unless the guy was doing a crappy job of teaching shidougo, in which case Waya would feel perfectly justified kicking his ass around the goban. Waya took a seat at the nearest table to the corner table, and pretended to read one of the joseki books while he strained to listen to the conversation between Muramatsu and Fujiwara. He would have preferred to watch the lesson, but Muramatsu was more prickly than most players and didn't like observers.

The two players, however, were largely silent, other than Muramatsu's occasional vocalized thoughts. Waya wondered if the older man was aware of his tendency to speak aloud, and he just didn't care if the other players heard.

"I wonder if I oughtta go here... nah, that sneaky guy's probably plotting something."

Waya stifled a laugh with his hand, but nearly lost it a few hands later when Muramatsu addressed a captured stone with a "Come to papa, little one." Hearing a grumpy old man talk like that was almost as entertaining as Ochi tapping out Morse Code on the bathroom stall when he lost.

About fifteen minutes later, Muramatsu acknowledged his defeat. "I don't think I can do much more. You've got me surrounded here and here, and you're about to kill my stones in the center. I could fight you longer, but it won't change the outcome, will it?"

"I'm afraid not," answered Fujiwara in a tone that managed to sound both gracious and cheerful. "You could play a katatsuki here and save these stones, but you've lost too much territory here to make up the difference."

"What if I'd done a tsuke at this hand, instead of a hane?"

Waya listened intently as Fujiwara answered Muramatsu's question thoroughly, explaining the consequences of the hypothetical move in terms that a casual player could grasp easily, pausing occasionally to make sure Muramatsu was following. There were no traces of condescension in Fujiwara's voice, like the gloating attitude stronger players sometimes developed when they'd become accustomed to easy wins.

Waya nodded appreciatively. Waya couldn't tell how good Fujiwara's explanation actually was since he couldn't see the goban, but at least now he knew there was no need for a retributive ass-kicking. Fujiwara had respect for shidougo.

"Thanks for the game, Fujiwara-san," said Muramatsu, and the go stones clattered across the board as the two players sorted them. Muramatsu pushed his chair back with a scrape. "Next time, you'd better not go easy on me just because I'm an old man, and don't think I didn't know you were all along. You're a hundred years too early to fool me."

"Perhaps you're simply improving," offered Fujiwara, sounding amused.

"Liar," retorted Muramatsu with a familiarity that suggested the two men had held this particular conversation many times before.

Muramatsu noticed Waya then, and nodded in greeting. "Afternoon, Waya-sensei. Is that homework there? I thought you young go pros were all dropouts."

"No sir, these are joseki books, and I'm not a drop-"

Waya broke off abruptly at the sight of Fujiwara, who had half-turned in his chair to look at Waya. There was just no way, Waya thought incredulously, that the decidedly masculine voice he'd been listening to could belong to guy with such a girly face. Fujiwara looked even girlier than Touya ever had (a feat Waya would not have considered possible previously.) But at least with late adolescence, Touya's face had finally sharpened into angles that matched his icy personality. This guy, though, had apparently managed to opt out of puberty, with those soft features and wide eyes. The ruby earrings certainly didn't help matters.

"Cat got your tongue?" Muramatsu arched an eyebrow.

Waya faked a cough to cover that he'd been staring like a dork. "No sir. I was just saying that I'm a professional, and I completed junior high school. So I'm not a dropout."

"High school dropout, then."

Obviously, Muramatsu was just being perverse to get a rise out of him in front of the newcomer, so Waya forced himself to hold his tongue in hopes that the old fossil would lose interest.

"Waya-sensei is a go professional?" Now Fujiwara was the one staring, his eyes lit with an eagerness that made Waya shift on his feet. People usually didn't stare at Waya quite like that.

"Yes, for a few years. By the way, would you like to play a game with me? Then I can give you a ranking for your profile here."

"Yes! Let's play right now, Sensei!" Fujiwara beamed and clasped his hands together as if Waya had just offered him a million yen. "Please, have a seat!" Fujiwara gestured to the seat Muramatsu had just vacated.

Muramatsu muttered something under his breath about go addicts and wandered off as Waya took the seat cautiously, carefully edging around Fujiwara who had started to hum an odd tune to himself. Waya knew plenty of odd go pros (like Touya and Ochi) but he hadn't realized that the amateurs could be just as weird.

"Shall we nigiri?" Fujiwara said cheerfully as he took the lid off his goke, revealing white stones.

Waya shook his head. "No, I'll play White, but other than that it will be even game so I can determine your ability."

Fujiwara tilted his head thoughtfully. "Can all professionals give rankings, or is it a specialty?"

"All pros can do it," Waya said as he exchanged goke with Fujiwara. "Just like all pros are authorized to teach shidougo."

If Fujiwara had caught the slightly pointed barb, he gave no indication of it, his gaze turned slightly inward for a moment as if he were preoccupied with something else. But that preoccupation had slipped from Fujiwara's face by the time he looked up from fiddling with his goke at his end of the goban.

Waya bowed. "Onegaishimasu."

"Onegaishimasu," Fujiwara said, returning the bow.

About twenty hands into the game, Waya furrowed his brow. He'd always prided himself in his ability to get a feel for his opponents quickly by reading their body language in addition to their go, but so far Fujiwara was just confusing him. As soon as Fujiwara had placed his first stone at 17-16, that crazy hyperness had suddenly vanished, his face becoming as serene and inscrutable as a Buddha statue's. Sure, Waya was gladFujiwara had stopped humming that stupid tune, but it was a little weird to see him undergo a complete 180, especially when Waya had had the guy pegged as the type to show his emotions openly.

And wasn't the ranking important to Fujiwara? Usually people who weren't used to playing with pros got a little nervous their first time, especially if something were at stake, and serious players were almost as fiercely protective of their rankings as pros their titles. Yet Fujiwara displayed neither hesitation nor nervousness, placing his stones as if it were just another game with the salon regulars.

Waya shrugged mentally. Perhaps Fujiwara just possessed a good set of nerves, or an excellent poker face. But they would be out of the beginning stages of the game soon, and Waya needed to focus on developing the framework he'd laid, along with setting a few surprises for Fujiwara. So far Fujiwara's moves had been solid with thoughtful reasoning, and Waya was curious to see how far the other man was capable of going if prodded. After a few moments of consideration, Waya placed a stone at 14-8. 14-8 didn't appear to be significant upon first glance, but if Fujiwara didn't respond to the move soon enough, White's position there would become unassailable.

Fujiwara's eyes riveted to the stone as soon as Waya placed it, his lips pursing to a point. Fujiwara dropped his hand to his lap and drew out a white fan Waya hadn't noticed before. With an elegant flick of his wrist, Fujiwara snapped the fan open, then, face concealed, laid down his response to Waya's move, a keimagakari at 15-10.

15-10? What sort of a response was that supposed to be? It left Black exposed to a pincer from White that would cut off Black's contact with its outside groups. But Fujiwara had probably just reacted too quickly and hadn't noticed Waya's trap; traps were one of Waya's specialties, after all.

Waya continued to lay out the trap, but Fujiwara still did not appear to find it worthy of his notice, instead choosing to play stones elsewhere. Hadn't Fujiwara realized his predicament yet? Waya had been expecting a little more of the player the salon owner held in such esteem. Waya cast an irritable glance across the goban.

Fujiwara met Waya's glance over his fan, but he didn't seem worried at all. Actually, Fujiwara looked pretty damn... amused? Waya did a double take. There was no doubt about it, Fujiwara's eyes were definitely crinkled in amusement and he was looking at Waya like Waya had food or something on his face.

Waya scanned the goban quickly, his pulse accelerating. Was Fujiwara just trying to psych him out, or had Waya missed something? Of course it would be pretty amusing to an amateur to catch a pro making a dumb mistake, but Waya didn't think he'd made any. Lately, his confidence in his play had been growing, and he'd noticed that he seemed to be making fewer and fewer mistakes as a result. No, Waya concluded as he gave the board a final glance-over, he hadn't made any mistakes.

But the niggling feeling remained as Waya continued playing. Maybe it was just the stupid fan – seeing another young player with a fan reminded him of Shindou, and Shindou had the habit of bringing out his fan when he was about to start an ass-kicking. Waya had developed a bit of an aversion to that cheap fan as a result, although he knew it was unhealthy to develop mental blocks towards certain players. I have got to stop overestimating people, especially Shindou, Waya chided himself. Sure, Shindou kept getting stronger, but he wasn't a go god... even though Waya still suspected Shindou had had a connection t at some point. Had had – Shindou's go had fewer and fewer similarities to s a i's classic-style go as he continued to move up, like he was no longer directly influenced by Sai.

Change was inevitable for a talented go player, though. Waya wondered what Sai's go would look like now, if the mystery player deigned to reappear on the Internet. Sai's go had been so strong, yet deceptively simple on the surface. If you didn't read far enough ahead, you wouldn't realize the depth of s a i's go and the extent of the brilliant plans. You'd be caught by-

Suddenly Fujiwara's patterns sharpened into focus, and Waya's heart thudded so loudly he felt it in his eardrums. Waya had been focusing on the pincer movement, but Fujiwara had ignored it because it simply didn't matter – not when Fujiwara had been laying down stones to seize control of the entire area. In a flash of clarity, Waya realized exactly who he was facing.

Waya had played Sai before, after all.

In his mind's eye, Waya saw himself as an insei at the World Amateur Go Championship, speaking to a crowd of enthralled pros and amateurs. It's as if Shusaku has learned modern joseki. But that had been several years ago, an had not remained stagnant, Waya realized as he studied the patterns of Black on the goban with a dawning mixture of awe and fear. Sai's game had grown even more sophisticated and subtle during his absence from the Internet. No wonder Waya hadn't recognized Fujiwara's style immediately, especially since Waya hadn't expected to bump into Sai at some random no-name go salon.

Waya looked up at Fujiwara again. The amusement was gone from Fujiwara's eyes now, replaced by an piercing intensity.

Before, when Waya had less experience, he would have felt paralyzingly overwhelmed by the prospect of playing Sai in person. But he'd played Morishita-sensei in several official matches by now, and Sensei felt every bit as intimidating as Fujiwara. So Waya stared back at Fujiwara, hardening his resolve to win the game. I'm going to come after you with everything I've got.

Waya quickly formulated an aggressive plan to halt Fujiwara's progress. Usually Waya didn't like to extend himself quite so much, but nothing less would stop Black. Waya was certain Fujiwara's aim was to connect Black in the center with Black in Waya's right quadrant. If Fujiwara managed that, White in Waya's right would be cut off from the White that had invaded Fujiwara's right quadrant, and White's territory would be halved.

Gritting his teeth, Waya started an attack in the center using an approach Morishita-sensei had just discussed in last week's study. Sensei had mentioned that the playing such approach in the center was regarded as unusual and risky – perhaps prohibitively so – but Waya felt certain that his only chance at beating Fujiwara was to catch him by surprise. There was no way Waya could hope to challenge Fujiwara by merely playing standard moves, not when s a i's knowledge of classic go was so complete that Waya could barely grasp its depth at times.

As Waya fleshed out his attack in the center, he altered the shape from what they'd discussed in the study. The alterations would make the shape more solid and harder for Black to break through.

A sudden inhalation made Waya jerk his head up. Fujiwara had gone motionless behind his fan, but his eyes glittered as he stared at White in the center.

Fujiwara was happy. Somehow, Waya doubted that boded well for him.

Black began a punishing assault on White's formation in the center, encircling the stones in order to cut the group adrift. White fought back fiercely, but Black danced around White's attacks easily. He's outreading me, Waya realized with a sinking feeling. How far ahead could Sai read?

After a few more hands, White lay dead in the center and Waya knew he had to concede defeat. He could feasibly regain a few points during the endgame, but it wouldn't be enough to make up the difference, even with komi.

"Makemashita." Waya bowed low over the goban. He heard Fujiwara's fan snap shut, and when Waya straightened up, the other man was smiling.

"It was a wonderful game. Thank you for playing me, Sensei."

"Don't call me that," Waya mumbled, raking his fingers through his bangs. Rank Sai indeed. If there were any go gods, they had a perverse sense of humor. "I don't have anything to teach you."

Fujiwara pursed his lips indignantly. "What do you call this, then?" He waved his fan at the center of the board. "I've never seen this played before, not at this location!"

"It didn't work."

"The concept was good, and the execution was not flawed either. But I have more experience than you do, Waya-sensei, so I was still able to take control of the area."

Waya felt his heart start to race again. Of course he'd lost to Sai, that really wasn't anything to get depressed or embarrassed about, even if the man was technically an amateur. More importantly, he was actually with Sai in person. He could actually get to know the mysterious NetGo player. That ChinesePro, Yang- something, would kill for a chande like this, Waya thought smugly.

"How long have you been playing go?" Waya said. Probably since he was freakin' two years old like Touya. The other man had placed his stones with a fluid grace that Waya envied, moving them from goke to goban as if the stones were merely extensions of his fingers. Such skill came only with a tremendous amount of practice.

A frown flitted across Fujiwara's face. "I'm not sure, exactly..."

"Oh, how old are you? You really don't seem much older than I am, but the way you play reminds me of my sensei, like you've been playing for a very long time."

"I'm in my twenties," Fujiwara said, but his eyes slid to the side as if he were nervous, and he shifted back into his chair, putting more distance between them.

He doesn't like me asking him questions about his personal life, Waya realized, remembering how silent Sai had been on the NetGo servers. Sai had never even chatted with anyone - with the sole exception of himself. Some people had theorized that Sai had a very pressing reason to remain anonymous, and he had stopped playing NetGo because people had been trying to trace his IP address. Waya narrowed his eyes. A dark secret would explain why Fujiwara hadn't gone pro and why he was playing in some little unknown salon where no one was likely to recognize his play. Perhaps "Fujiwara" wasn't even his real name.

But on the other hand, if he pressed Fujiwara too much, the other man might simply disappear again. Waya really wanted to learn more about Sai, but satisfying his curiosity about Fujiwara would have to wait. Fujiwara's secret probably wasn't that bad (unless Fujiwara's secret was that he liked to ax murder go-playing redheads, and frankly Waya thought he could take Fujiwara in a fight anyway.) Getting a chance to play Fujiwara again was more important, and if Waya gradually established a rapport with Fujiwara, then the other man might start to open up.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you a personal question like that, when we've just met!" Waya said, feigning sheepishness. "I just got excited. This was a really great game, even though I lost. Would you explain to me what moves I should have played in the center instead?"

Fujiwara lit up then, and he launched into a thorough explanation for Waya. _He really does enjoy teaching_ , Waya thought. By the time they had finished discussing the game, Fujiwara's earlier tension had disappeared, and Fujiwara readily agreed to meeting Waya at the salon again the following week for another game.

On his way out of the salon, Waya told the owner that it would be perfectly acceptable to rate Fujiwara as an Amateur 7-dan. Waya was proud that he managed to keep a straight face.

###

 _ **Note:** __Credit to Ontogenesis's Desynchronization._


	51. Ogata's next Move

**Chapter 50: Ogata's next Move**

Fujiwara was Sai!

There was a website dedicated to **Sai** 's kifu, maintained by a Chinese player who went by the handle **old man 'n' sea**. Ogata had studied the site carefully: **old man 'n' sea** had painstakingly scraped together ten reproductions of games known to have been played by **Sai** during his short-lived NetGo career. Ten was a pitifully meager number compared to the actual number of games **Sai** was rumored to have played. The absence of so many kifu meant that reading all of the kifu together for an overview of **Sai** 's phenomenal development was akin to watching film footage with key scenes missing: it was jerky and sporadic, with inexplicable results. Now when Ogata analyzed the kifu and compared them with the games he'd played against Fujiwara in the previous days again and again, every rest of his doubt was erased. **_Fujiwara was Sai._**

In the last day that Ogata played Sai, he could feel a brand new fountain of energy and beauty emerge from his Go. No wonder Sensei was so desperate for a rematch with Sai. Ogata smirked, imagining the Meijin's expression when he received a phone call, informing him that while he'd been off globe- trotting, Sai had been under his nose all along. Wouldn't Sensei be so surprised to learn Sai had popped up under their noses, just a mere stone's throw away from the Go Association?

 _But why tell him? He wouldn't even share a little information about Sai with you, not even when you begged him in the hospital. Same with that Shindou brat_. Ogata blinked in surprise at the old venom behind that sudden thought. Ogata had thought he had gotten over the resentment about being left out of the secret; he'd realized that obviously Shindou had made Sensei swear to keep a secret, and it simply wasn't in Sensei's nature to break a promise. Although Sensei could have at least made the effort to see i would be willing to play Ogata as well. Ogata had been Sensei's student longer than anyone else, after all, and Ogata had wanted to play Sai so very badly.

Rather like the position Touya Meijin was in now, apparently. According to Internet rumor, someone had overheard Sensei remark to a Korean pro that there was nothing he desired more than a rematch with Sai . Well, tough luck. Ogata felt his spine stiffen with resolve as he willed away the faint sense of disloyalty nipping at his conscience. Sensei had already had his chance to play Sai, now it was Ogata's turn. Anyway, Ogata was certain Sensei knew no details of the real person behind the net handle Sai; if Sensei had, he could have used those details to track Sai down. Touya Meijin would be of no use in helping Fujiwara overcome his amnesia.

Shindou, on the other hand... Shindou had been known to never have a formal sensei. But the rapid development of Shindou's skills was the sort that only came from constant exposure to an excellent, demanding teacher. There was little doubt in Ogata's mind that Sai's style was stamped all over Shindou's; he'd found way too many similarities while comparing their kifu. Shindou must be a treasured, trusted pupil to Sai. Perhaps, Fujiwara had exchanged personal details with Shindou: where he lived, who he lived with, his pictures, his job... But then again, maybe he was just as secretive with Shindou, and Shindou was sensitive about being prodded about Sai because he didn't want to risk a relatively fragile relationship. There was also the matter of Shindou's sudden withdrawal from the Go community for a few months, back when he'd first turned pro: had Shindou had a falling out with Sai? Or had Sai suddenly disappeared from the Internet due to circumstances beyond his control, perhaps the very same circumstances that had resulted in him floating half-conscious and amnesiac in the Ichigaya Canal?

It was possible Shindou had some answers. It was just as possible he didn't. Maybe it was best to keep Sai as his secret for sometime now. Sai had agreed to coach him for several weeks until the challenger match with Kurata. _So no need to rush now._ Kurata had a nice surprise coming to him.

End of the slump.

He'd rise again.

That Gosei title was going to be **_his_** again.

###

 ** _Note:_** _Credits to Ontogenesis' Desynchronization._

 _I've reached the 50-chapter-limit and do not really know how to upload more. It'll be a great help if somebody could tell me how..._


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter 52**

"Akira!"

The door to the Go Salon slid open as Hikaru stormed through, pulling the eyes of all the patrons to him as he did so. His eyes darting to the crowd of people surrounding one of the tables, Hikaru began to make his way over as several patrons moved back reveal Akira sitting there staring at him curiously.

"Akira!" Hikaru bellowed once more, "LET'S PLAY!"

Gazing at the approaching form of his rival from his seat, Akira felt a vindictive grin form on his face as he saw the fire within Hikaru's eyes. Hikaru Shindo 2 – Dan, The Juudan Slayer, was back. "All right then, have a seat." As Hikaru moved to do so, Akira turned back to the board and began to return the stones that had been depicting his victory from yesterday against Fujisawa to their respective bowls.

Taking his seat across from Akira, Hikaru moved to help him finish clearing the board, taking one of the bowls as they finished. By now more patrons were beginning to make their way over, as it had now been some time since they'd seen these two play, and while some might never admit it, they too had missed these games. Lifting his eyes up to meet Akira's eyes, which now held the same intensity as his own, Hikaru felt his hard face soften as he said, "Akira, before we play, there's something I want to talk to you about. You see… It's about that day… on the attic…when my grandpa passed away."

Akira also heard his voice soften. "Hikaru, do you want us to go somewhere else to talk?"

Hikaru somehow felt warm in his heart hearing his eternal rival calling him by his given name. _Hi-ka-ru. Hi-ka-ru._ His face beamed, "Let us play a game here, then we could go somewhere to discuss the game and…talk. "

"Let's go home to me then. My parents are in China, so I have the place to myself. We can buy something to eat on the way."

"He was a ghost. I was twelve years old back then. Akari and I found an old Go board in that attic of my Grandpa's house. I saw bloodstains on the board, but Akari didn't. Then, there was a voice asking whether I could hear him. That voice belonged to a ghost in Heian court attire. His long dark hair streamed like river flow. His amethyst orbs gazed unfathomably like deep purple abyss. The fan in his hand concealed his mystique smile."

Hikaru's jaw clenched and unclenched before he continued, "The ghost had taught me how to play go from scratch henceforth. He was only visible and audible to me alone. He told me where to place the go stones on the board. . The ghost, after all, had done the same method before, Torajirou in the Edo period. You know, Honinbou Shuusaku."

Akira's mouth was agape at the mention of the name, but he let Hikaru carry on without interruption.

"The ghost had initially been a Heian emperor's go instructor. He had been cheated during a game, but accused of cheating instead and banished from the court. He hadn't been able to live on after such dishonor and drowned himself."

Stones of guilt settled within Hikaru's guts. The furrow on Akira's eyebrows told Hikaru his sympathy for the misfortune that befell such a talented Go player.

"And yet, there were times when I grew selfish and wanted to play his own games. Worst of all, I sabotaged a game with an important opponent who had gone through such length just to an opportunity to re-challenge the ghost. The game ended in catastrophe; the opponent's expectation was betrayed."

No longer was Hikaru able to look at Akira in the eyes. Each word felt heavier in his ponderous heart.

"I wanted to repent for my mistakes and become a worthy opponent for the one I had disappointed. I couldn't afford the ghost to play with any other player face-to-face again, however, so I played net go. The ghost's capability was soon recognized globally, leaving me no choice but to quit net go.

Step by step, I walked down the path of go by becoming an insei first and then pro. Just then, on a day of the Golden Week last year, the ghost disappeared. I stopped playing go, in hope that the ghost might return if I let the ghost play as he used to. After months of waiting, the ghost did not return still." Hikaru said. He closed his eyes, feeling dizzy. He had been waiting to tell Akira this story a long time.

"His name was Fujiwara no Sai."

 ** _Sai._**

Hikaru explained how desperately he'd searched for him, and how he'd decided not to play, his voice shook, and he was unsurprised when his tears choked him too much to speak. He cried, his hands curling into fists and pressing against his thighs.

There was the sound of movement, and two arms were around his shoulders embracing him. He clung to Akira's shoulders and cried. It seemed to go on for a long time, yet Akira held him patiently, stroking his back as Hikaru soaked his shirt just like the day his Grandpa passed away.

"What made you start playing again?" Akira's voice was low and sympathetic, and Hikaru sniffed.

"Isumi came on a visit," he said, hoarsely. "I kinda owed him a game." He told the rest of the story with his face still pressed against his rival's shoulder, though he made sure to tilt his head a little, so his words wouldn't be too muffled.

"Was that when you appeared before me?" Akira asked, sounding pleased.

"Yeah, when the game was over, I ran to see you," Hikaru explained, unconcerned. "I didn't want you to have to wait any longer." Reluctantly, and leaving his arms around Touya's shoulders, he lifted his head, looking at him, aware that he was probably still tear-stained and red-faced with crying. "That's how it is," he added. "I'm not Sai. Sai isn't around any more, only he is in my game. Is that enough?"

This was the moment he'd been afraid of, this was what he had been dreading. What if it really wasn't enough? Akira was suddenly resting a palm against his cheek, in a move that was clearly intended to reassure. His hand was warm, and the touch gentle. Akira's face was so near his, so near that he could feel Akira's warm breath on his cheeks. Hikaru liked it, he decided. A lot.

"I'm sorry Sai is gone," Akira said, "How could I not be? It would be quite something, to be able to play against Shuusaku. But he could never be my rival. You are. And yes, that is enough. That is, in fact, all I need." Looking deep into Hikaru's eyes, he continued. "How I am glad to have…. "

Akira couldn't finish his sentenced as he felt two hands cup the back of his head, pull him closer and lips move against his, and Hikaru's tongue brushed so gently, the tip of the tounge traced the outline of his lips. And then it slided into his mouth and … oh God Hikaru's kissing him, actually kissing him. Akira felt like he forgot to breath, he closed his eyes he made a small sound and moved closer, slipping his arms around Hikaru's waist. It felt so good, in fact, that it was a bit too much. Akira's heart beat painfully each time Hikaru pecked his lips. He broke off the kiss and rested his chin on Hikaru's shoulder, breathing heavily. That was his first kiss. No matter what happened later in life, this was his first kiss, and it had been with Hikaru.

Hikaru remained silence and watched Akira. Akira still closed his yes, long eyelashes were resting on his cheeks, and most of his hair seemed to be covering his face. Hikaru reached out with his one free limb and brushed the hair out of his face, lightly. The hair was slippery and smooth to the touch. Against his better judgement, he played with it, tucking some of it behind Akira's ear, stroking it and running it through his fingers.  
They stayed close and quiet like that for another few minutes, until Akira pitifully discovered it was already nearly bedtime. Hikaru didn't want to leave, but he had no reason to excuse his parents for. They held each other silently for some more minutes then Hikaru put a kiss goodbye on Akira's forehead, and left.

 ** _###_**

 _Credits to:_ _Stirring-still (Preliminaries) and topgallant (A Whole New Apocalypse)_


	53. Chapter 53

**Chapter 53**

"Shindou, what's wrong with you? You seem so distracted lately…are you daydreaming or what? SHINDOU!" Waya shouted.

 _Akira's lips were soft. And his hair…and the warmth of his body..._ "Oh…sorry Waya….what did you say again?"

"I'll just learn hard from now on, and then come the Hokuto Cup, you and I can breeze through the preliminaries and beat China and Korea in this year's tournament."

His eyes shifting away from his friend at that statement, Hikaru muttered, "I won't be breezing through the preliminaries."

His brow contorting as he struggled to make out what Hikaru had said, Waya asked, "What?"

"I said that I won't be breezing through the preliminaries with you. See… I won't be in the preliminaries."

His eyes widening in shock, Waya countered, "Won't be in it! Shindo, what's wrong with you? Don't you want to compete against China and Korea?"

His eyes shifting to meet his friend's eyes now, a hesitant look on his face, Hikaru replied, "You don't get it Waya, I won't be in the _preliminaries_. I got a letter from the Go Association over the weekend, both Akira and I have been pre-selected to participate in the Hokuto Cup this year. The preliminary will be played for the third spot only. Sorry."

As comprehension dawned on Waya, his mind became aflutter with countless thoughts. On the one hand he was quite happy for his friend, being seeded into any tournament, especially an international one with the reputation of the country on his shoulders was an honor, but on the other he was apprehensive. It made sense of course, Hikaru was in the Kisei League, had won twenty-three straight matches at one point, seeding Akira and not Hikaru would be ludicrous. "Well… I guess congrats then Shindo, no need to worry about us having to knock each other out in this tournament then huh? Besides, I think this makes it interesting."

Nodding, Hikaru smiled. Good, Waya was taking it better than he'd hoped.

Oh, speaking of the Hokuto Cup, that reminds me…" Waya said as he reached for his coat that he'd set on the back of Hikaru's desk chair. Removing a Go magazine from an inside pocket, Waya flipped it to Hikaru and said, "Page 22, it's about Ko Yeong Ha."

His eyebrow cocking at the mention of that name, Hikaru began to flip through the pages while saying, "What about him?"

"I didn't know if you'd heard yet or not," Waya answered, "but last week Ko Yeong Ha did it, he won the Ch'eonweon Title. There's an article about his victory in there too along with the game record. The article doesn't have much that you couldn't pull from the game record, but it does have a few quotes from Ko Yeong Ha, particularly a rather long one on how he sees the current Go world. Kind of arrogant really. Anyway, thought you might be interested so…"

Hikaru nodded as he finally came to the page, his eyes glancing briefly over the game record before moving onto the article itself. He then inhaled deeply as his eyes found the part Waya had mentioned, and the young pro began to read.

###

"Damn, if only I hadn't been scheduled to play my own match that day, I could have been there to see you win the Ch'eonweon Title!"

Shaking his head with a childish smirk, Ko Yong Ha leaned back on his hands and watched with amusement as Hon Suyon continued his pout.

"Come now Suyon, I'm showing you the game now, so don't be so uptight. Besides, this way you get to hear all of my thoughts on the match."

Frowning as he returned his eyes to the board, Suyon gritted his teeth and said nothing, trying to bring his focus back to the board. All it did though was make his body tremble more.

Noticing this, Yong Ha's smile vanished as he said, "What is it?"

Hesitating a moment, Suyon then said, "It's your comments that piss me off."

Frowning himself now, Yong Ha shot back, "Suyon, don't tell me your mad about that again. I answered the questions the reporters asked me, if you want to be mad at someone, be mad at the reporters for asking me those questions in the first place."

"It's not…" Suyon stopped mid-sentence, considered his words a moment then finished, "nothing, never mind."

"Come on Suyon, just say it if you had a problem with one of my statements."

Lifting his eyes up, Suyon answered, "It's not one of your statements, it's all of them lately. Ever since that whole mess with the misunderstanding by that reporter about Shuusaku, you've been poking fun at the reporters, other players, and even the current perception of the game that one time. This isn't the Ko Yeong Ha I admire; you're better than this. It's like you're looking for a fight or something."

Chuckling at that, Yeong Ha lifted his right hand up to scratch and itch on his cheek, then answered with a smile, "Pick a fight huh? Maybe. I don't' know, it's just fun to play with people like that a little. _Those_ out there who truly understand this game, who truly understand me and my strength, know the truth behind all of it. The rest, heh, let them think whatever they want."

"But Yong Ha…" Pausing again to consider his words, Suyon then replied, "you're getting a reputation from this, and plenty of strong players won't understand, both here and abroad."

His smile dissolving once again, Yeong Ha said bluntly, "Suyon, say what you really want to say, not all this talk about vague, hypothetical players." He was already quite certain what all of this had been about, and while it had been fun to beat around it and play with his words until now, he was beginning to become bored of such games.

Inhaling, Suyon responded, "You could have been nicer when that reporter asked for your thoughts on Touya and Shindo's exploits in the Kisei League."

A long pause ensued as Yeong Ha's eyes turned away from his peer and moved about the room, glancing over the bookshelves, passed the computer in the other room and finally to the board before him. "I am who I am, and why should I force myself to be nice to someone who I don't want to be nice to. Got it?"

###

"The time when we, the future of the Go world, have need to study those who have come before us is at an end. We are now segueing into a new era, one where we study not those of the past but rather one another." Pausing a moment as he scanned passed the reporter's intermingled comments, Hikaru then resumed reading the quote. "Go is a living game with new and improved strategies being born every day. Because of this a time can and must arrive when the players of one generation completely surpass the generations from before. That time is now. We have gleamed into the past and learned all there is to learn, applying it to the extreme of what it can be. The time of old players, like… **Shuusaku** is over. Now we must look to each other, so that in studying and learning from the present we might shape a grander future in the world of Go.

"Here in Korea we have the highest level of Go, one that everyone else throughout the world looks to as a means to measure their ability. As such it is our responsibility, our obligation as ambassadors to the world of this great game is to continue to excel for the good of the game. This is the standard to which I hold myself, so that when those who truly wish to understand Go study the game records of Ko Yeong Ha the awe and inspiration they draw from my insights into the game shall push them to strive for the bar that I have set. It is with such a mindset that I have gained the Ch'eonweon Title, and the mindset I will take into the future games as I play the best in the world."

His eyes continuing to gleam down the paper, Hikaru then closed his eyes and exhaled deeply. Watching on, Waya bit his lip apprehensively. He had shown Hikaru this article for two reasons, the first being that he was certain that at some point someone would ask him what his thoughts were on the matter, and it'd thus be better if he were already aware of it, and not blindsided by it. The other reason however was the hope that it might help him rediscover that drive to play and succeed that had been missing within him since his grandfather's death. As his friend Waya knew that Hikaru hated to be underestimated or mocked, and Ko Yeong Ha had been mocking all of Japan with that statement.

However, looking at the somber, non-reactive expression on his friend's face now, Waya was beginning to worry if perhaps his plan had actually backfired. Such statements would likely only elicit two responses, either angered defiance and a desire to rise up and prove the statement wrong, or acquiescence and surrender to the truth of the statement. Normally Waya would have bet every last Yen of his money on Hikaru taking the challenge for what it was and striving to show his strength, but this current Hikaru, who was now questioning his place in the Go world, searching for himself, would he bow his head to such talk? Even as he thought it Waya watched as Hikaru's head lowered, eyes closed with a sort of melancholy coming over his face. This was not good, had he just driven his friend into even deeper depression? Damn, he never should have shown him the article. "Shindo I-"

Waya's words broke off as he saw Hikaru's body begin to tremble. Normally that would have been an even worse sign, if not for the other thing; the hair on the back of Waya's neck was standing on end, tingling with fear and awe. Then Hikaru's eyes opened and lifted up to stare into Waya's eyes, causing the seventeen year old to jump slightly as he saw that look in his friend's eyes, the look of a hungry predator.

Pulling his eyes away from Waya calmly, Hikaru returned his attention once more to the article in his shaking hands and gritted his teeth, the slightest beginning of a growl forming in the pit of his throat. Nothing left to teach, surpassing the players of the past, Hikaru had heard these words before, but new significance was added to the weight of them on his heart. His eyes moving to the old Go boards in his room, Hikaru felt the fire within his soul blaze even brighter. A future, that both Sai and his grandfather had now entrusted to him. Sai had given it to him first, and with his death his grandfather had followed suit, a mission to connect the distant past with the far future, that was his goal, that was his true inheritance. Those Go boards had been right there telling him all this time and he'd been blind and deaf to it until now; the hopes and dreams of those who came before him, the will to continue on had been passed to him, materialized but not embodied within those two boards.

Turning his gaze back to Waya, Hikaru closed the magazine and set it to the floor, and then with the slightest trace of rage within his voice said, "Waya… I'm going to destroy him, grind his bones to dust and leave him a huddled mass of goo in front of the board. We cannot forget the past… we will not forget the past, Shusaku, Grandpa, none of them, as long as they survive in our memories and hearts… I'm going to make him regret those words, Ko Yeong Ha will _pay_."

A shiver ran down Waya's spine at that last sentence. Man, when he was worked up like this, Hikaru could be really scary. Ko Yeong Ha had done it, he'd done what the rest of Hikaru's friends had been unable to do, he had awoken the sleeping lion within Hikaru's soul, and not just awakened, but whet it's appetite too. _Ko Yeong Ha, you poor, arrogant fool, you might have just made the biggest mistake of your life!_

###

 _Note:_ _Credits to Leitbur (The Never-ending Road)_


	54. Chapter 54

**Chapter 54**

"I'm back," Ogata called out as he slipped off his shoes in the entranceway, but Fujiwara didn't answer so Ogata went to his bedroom to put his suitcase down.

Fujiwara was in the study, staring at the aquarium so intently that he didn't turn his head when Ogata entered.

"Anyone get eaten?"

Fujiwara glanced up and smiled. "Welcome back! And of course not, I kept them well fed. Murakami was chasing Mishima again, and Ginko and Momiji are going to give birth again. I also cleaned the gravel and did a water change."

"You _named_ the fish?"

"Well it's not as if I can just go around calling them " _Pterophyllum altum_ Number One"and " _Poecilia reticulata_ Number Three." That would be _rude_ ," Fujiwara said with a sniff that implied only a barbarian would disagree.

Ogata could hardly disappoint Fujiwara when he was making such a haughty expression and being a know-it-all as well. "They're fish. Naming cats and dogs makes sense because they'll come when you call and do tricks. Fish don't."

"This clown loach does tricks... well, he's tricky, at least. He floats on his belly and plays dead, and he steals food from the other fish."

Ogata stared at the black and orange striped fish in question, which was currently reclining on a plant, its belly distended with its ill-gotten gains. It stared back at him with a fishy smugness that somehow seemed familiar. Ogata smirked. "Well then, name this one Kuwabara."

"Oh, that's a nice name." Fujiwara pressed his nose against the tank, making cooing noises. "Kuwabara, you're a fat little cutie, aren't you? Yes you are!"

Ogata wondered if he'd ever be able to look at the old man with a straight face again, now that he had that lovely image burned into his mind. Probably not.

Fujiwara pulled himself away from the tank, wiping the smudge off with his jacket sleeve. "Let's have some tea, and you can tell me all about the demonstration game."

A few minutes later, Ogata had a cup of pekoe tea cooling in his hands. "The demonstration went fine, except Ashiwara-sensei made a weak move here," he said, leaning forward from the sofa to place the black stone on the goban.

"Because then you could cut Black off. Your next move was at 6-4, right?"

Ogata shook his head. "Actually, no. The game would have ended at around 120 moves then, and that would have been disappointing to the audience and sponsors. They expect an exchange between pros to last for a long time, and I don't mind being a little generous when it's not an official game. This is more like shidougo for the observers rather than a regular match."

Fujiwara tapped his fan against his lips in consideration. "Shidougo for observers... but surely the commentators noticed and criticized you."

"No, that isn't a possibility most would notice. That's why I chose not to make it. Ashiwara bugged me about it after the game, though. He's a good player, so he realized the mistake as soon as he'd finished placing the stone."

Ogata finished recreating the game, then said, "Now that this conference is out of the way, I don't have any major commitments until the Gosei Title match starts in two months. I was considering taking it easy for a few days. You seem to enjoy the fish a lot. How would you like to visit an aquarium museum? There's an excellent one in Yokohama."

"An aquarium museum?"

"Basically imagine a lot of fish tanks, except full of hundreds of fish and thousands of liters of water. Aquariums are also allowed to keep rare species, and dolphins and whales."

Fujiwara bounced in his seat, looking like he was about to burst from excitement. "Yes! Let's go! Let's go _now_! When is it open? Is it far?"

"I'll take that as a 'yes.' And I'm afraid it's too far to visit tonight," said Ogata, amused at Fujiwara's exuberance. Not that he'd expected a different reaction; after all, Fujiwara liked fish enough to have memorized entire passages of Ogata's copy of _A Practical Guide to Freshwater Fish._

 _###_

As Ogata had thought, Fujiwara thoroughly enjoyed the Yokohama aquarium. It had been a few years since Ogata had last visited, so several of the exhibits were new to him as well. Ogata took pictures of some of the most attractive fish and arrangements, just in case he decided to set up his own saltwater tank in the future.

After they had finished viewing the aquariums on the third floor, it was almost starting time for the next "Marine Mammal Show" so they walked up to the open-air stadium on the fourth floor. The show had a definite slant towards families with young children (on cue, the sea lions made raspberry noises and clapped their fins together), but Ogata was still impressed by the expertise of the handlers, in particular with the dolphins and whales. The handlers had basically trained large, potentially dangerous animals to push them around the pool and flip them up into the air for a few fish, yet there was no hesitation on the part of the animals to obey, as if they had a strong bond of trust and cooperation with their handlers. (Either that, or the rewards were really, really tasty.)

The show finished, so the only place they hadn't visited yet was the "Dolphin Fantasy" building, an unfortunate name that invoked images of a hyper twelve-year-old girl with pink bedroom walls emblazoned with a mural of neon purple dolphins. But the building itself, thankfully, was painted a sensible ocean blue, and although there _was_ a dolphin mural on its walls, the dolphins were a natural gray shade with nary a hint of neon in sight. Directly inside the building's entrance was a small gift shop, but Ogata's eye was drawn past it to the magnificent glass tunnel that stretched down the length of most of the building. The glass had been molded in one solid piece so visitors underneath were provided with a seamless view of the dolphins darting about the tunnel. At the very end of the tunnel was a small, dark room with a cylindrical tank in which a solitary white beluga floated.

"Oh wow!" Fujiwara looked like he could barely restrain himself from pressing up against the glass and smudging it. "The show was wonderful, but here you can get much closer to the dolphins," Fujiwara said as a small, white-sided dolphin floated down to his eye-level. The dolphin regarded him with one black eye for a long moment, apparently equally as curious as its human visitor. "They seem extremely intelligent."

"After humans, dolphins are thought to be the smartest animals," Ogata said. "They have very complex social behaviors, and each dolphin even has its own distinct name." According to _National Geographic_ , that was. Ogata had subscribed mostly because the monthly ran informative articles about aquatic life in just about every other issue.

Fujiwara watched the dolphin dart away to rejoin a pod drifting in formation. "I wonder what that cute little fellow's name is?"

"Whistle-Click-Click-Squeal the Second," Ogata said, completely deadpan.

"Really?! Where do you see his name?" Fujiwara glanced up and down the tunnel, looking for a sign.

Ogata pulled his park guide out of his back pocket. "Right here, didn't you read this earlier?"

"Yes, I must have missed it!" said Fujiwara, taking the guide.

"The names are right next to the 'Dolphin' pronunciation chart," Ogata offered helpfully as Fujiwara scoured the guide. Ogata bit back a smirk, aware that it was probably a sign of a deep moral depravity that he could derive pleasure from teasing an amnesiac. Luckily, Ogata had never been overly concerned with ethics because he didn't particularly want to stop the teasing; Fujiwara was just _so_ earnest and curious and as a bonus, he made very amusing faces when he was indignant. Ashiwara also made entertaining expressions when teased, but Ogata had to be careful not to torment Ashiwara too much, or people would shoot him looks usually reserved for puppy-kickers. Ogata also had a special fondness for the way Akira's face flushed the most endearing shades of red when he was embarrassed, but lately Akira-kun had grown increasingly difficult to unsettle. Accursed teenage cynicism.

"Ogata-sensei is a horrible, horrible man." Fujiwara had closed the guide and was rapping it against his palm sharply, but his affronted tone was belied by upturned corners of his mouth.

Ogata shrugged. "It's true, but I can't accept full responsibility when you make those faces."

"I _don't_ make faces. That would be childish. And unrefined." Fujiwara folded his arms and pursed his lips.

"That's my second favorite face. I call it your 'Indignant Schoolmistress' expression. All you need are bifocals and a bun to complete it."

Fujiwara smacked Ogata on the elbow with the guide. "I do _not_ look like a schoolmistress."

Ogata continued on as if he hadn't noticed the assault on his elbow. "My favorite, though, is when you puff your cheeks out. You look just like those puffer fish we saw earlier."

"How awful, comparing me to a prickly fish and an old schoolmistress! Ogata-sensei must think I'm ugly!" Fujiwara aimed another blow at Ogata's elbow, but Ogata snagged Fujiwara's wrist this time and pulled forward, unbalancing Fujiwara enough that Fujiwara almost bumped into him.

"I never said I thought schoolmistresses were ugly, and I find puffer fish rather… _delicious._ " Ogata said softly into Fujiwara's ear before extracting the guide from Fujiwara with his other hand.

"Oh! That's... interesting," Fujiwara said breathlessly before tugging free. He whirled around to face the tank, but not before Ogata saw that his cheeks were flushed.

Not surprising. Even if Fujiwara hadn't grasped the precise innuendo, the man could have hardly failed to notice Ogata's tone; he _had_ been more or less _purring_ in the other man's ear. Ogata reprimanded himself mentally; he hadn't intended to escalate the teasing quite like that. It had just happened – an excuse which sounded spectacularly stupid, even to his own ears. Ogata did not "do" unplanned, especially when it went against something he'd decided. Although Ogata had never explicitly told Fujiwara not to touch him after the hugging incident, Fujiwara seemed to have decided on his own that he shouldn't, perhaps simply from following Ogata's lead. For all his childish exuberance, Fujiwara was quite concerned with proper behavior and etiquette, so he'd obviously been flustered by the unexpected physical contact.

Ogata hadn't realized that he'd grown overly relaxed with Fujiwara, although in retrospect he ought to have been on his guard: he'd been living with Fujiwara for some time, after all. It had been almost a month, then. Ogata didn't have any prior experience living with other people, he'd lived by himself ever since graduating high school. So he hadn't expected to get... attached. Well, Ogata resolved, he'd simply have to keep a tighter rein on himself. Attachments were messy, especially ones involving roommates. Mutually beneficial relationships shouldn't be allowed to devolve into attachments.

Fujiwara was still pretending to be preoccupied with the dolphins, so Ogata walked to the beluga tank by himself. The whale looked particularly stunning with its white skin glowing in the dimly lit room, although the lights were likely dimmed for the animal's comfort and not for the aesthetics. Belugas lived in the Arctic and spent much of their time submerged in dark, ice-covered water, which meant they were light-sensitive. Ogata frowned at his digital camera, wondering if he could take a decent picture with his flash turned off. The cylindrical shape of the tank would also probably cause some distortion if he tried to take a full-body shot. Maybe a postcard would be a better idea.

Ogata looked up from his camera and noticed that Fujiwara had wandered into the room while he'd been busy fiddling with the settings. Fujiwara stood still and silent, watching as the whale turned around and around in endless circles, gliding through the water like an apparition. Shadows flickered across Fujiwara's face as the whale's movements diffracted the tank's lighting.

Ogata's blood chilled at the unbidden memory of Fujiwara floating in the canal, long white sleeves billowing out in the dark water.

"Don't whales have names too? A language?" Fujiwara's voice was somber, devoid of the joy he'd displayed while watching the dolphins.

"I don't know if they have names, but they do have songs, so I suppose they must have a language," Ogata said.

"Why is this one all by himself? There are seven dolphins in that other tank."

"Whales need more space than dolphins. And it certainly seems to be healthy; look at how active it is. It's been swimming the whole time." If captive marine mammals were pining, they usually became listless and refused to eat, but this one was energetic and well-nourished. Obviously, there was nothing wrong with it, and frankly, Ogata cared a lot less about the whale's hypothetical well-being than shaking that odd, irrational sensation that had come over him. It should not matter one iota that Fujiwara was standing next to a tank. A secured tank was definitely not a deserted canal; people couldn't stumble into tanks.

"But no one can hear him sing."

"There are other ways to communicate. I spotted it blowing air bubbles at that little girl who was in here earlier. It seemed at least as amused as she was." The little tableau had been disgustingly cute, like something that would get plastered on a sappy greeting card.

"Being seen, being able to see... but he's still separate. Untouchable. That seems like such a lonely existence, doesn't it?" Then Fujiwara looked over his shoulder to offer Ogata a sheepish, apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, Ogata-sensei. I don't know why I keep asking annoying questions!"

Those _eyes_. Fujiwara was smiling, but his eyes were brimming with a sorrow that seemed too ancient to belong in Fujiwara's young face. Ogata had met those strikingly incongruous eyes before - but only over the goban, and only during particularly fierce struggles. Ogata had come to associate the look with some inner reservoir of Fujiwara's talent surfacing, so meeting that expression outside of go was unsettling. Even more unsettling, Fujiwara himself seemed completely unaware of that presence he possessed. Had the amnesia fractured Fujiwara that badly?

"Your questions aren't annoying," Ogata said. "You have an interesting perspective."

"...are you sure you don't mind?"

"Not at all. It's natural for you to ask a lot of questions, given your condition." Fujiwara's questions were definitely odd sometimes, but Ogata welcomed the opportunity to gain insight into how the other man's brilliant mind worked. And perhaps enough of the right questions would be the key to Fujiwara recalling a piece of critical information.

Fujiwara looked relieved. "I _do_ like this aquarium. If we lived closer, I'd be tempted to visit every day."

"You're in luck: there are several aquariums off the Yamanote Line; they just aren't as big as this one. I'll have to take you to the one in Shinagawa since you like dolphins so much." Ogata glanced at his watch. "Anyway, we're about finished now. Let's get dinner," he said, rather eager to leave. The mental image of Fujiwara half-drowned was still a little too fresh in his mind for him to feel comfortable staying any longer.

"Can we visit a Chinese restaurant? I want to practice ordering in Chinese. I think I'm improving because yesterday Lian-san said 'you don't make me wince in pain so much anymore.' "

Ogata arched an eyebrow. "Coming from her, that's practically a compliment. Just do me a favor and don't offer to help her improve her Japanese."

Fujiwara agreed with a laugh, and they walked towards the park exit, that inexplicable sadness gradually dissipating from Fujiwara's eyes as they talked. What could have possibly happened, Ogata wondered, that Fujiwara could be affected by the pain without the actual memory itself? And how would Fujiwara react when he _did_ remember? Fujiwara gave off an air of vulnerability, like he'd never learned how to properly filter out the world when necessary, never learned how to absorb its shocks. Maybe it was a side-effect of being too trusting.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	55. Chapter 55

**Chapter 55**

That evening Fujiwara had a nightmare.

Ogata had always been a light sleeper, so the sound of muffled sobs roused him awake and drew him to Fujiwara's bedroom door. He hesitated when his hand was on the doorknob, not wanting to invade the other man's privacy. On the other hand, Fujiwara was crying so hard that his breathing sounded ragged, and it wasn't as if Ogata would be able to go back to sleep while wondering what was wrong.

"May I come in?" Ogata called out, rapping on the door. There was a garbled noise that Ogata interpreted as assent, so he pushed the door open gingerly.

The bedside lamp was on. Fujiwara was hunched over on the edge of his bed, his face covered by his hands. Every now and then his body shuddered.

"Are you sick?" Ogata offered politely, in case Fujiwara didn't want to explain the real problem.

Fujiwara raised his head at the question, but stared blankly at Ogata, his vision unfocused as tears slipped down his face.

Ogata moved closer. "I said, do you feel ill?"

Fujiwara suddenly reached out, latching onto Ogata's wrist, and Ogata blinked in surprise. Fujiwara had a strong grip, even though his hand was trembling.

"Don't leave," Fujiwara whispered hoarsely, then dropped his head down again.

"I won't," Ogata promised. Even though he _was_ completely out of his comfort zone. People just didn't come to Ogata when they needed a shoulder to cry on; even his girlfriends had seemed to prefer their own friends when they needed emotional support. Which had always suited Ogata; if he'd wanted to play shrink he would have gone into counseling instead of go. But Fujiwara didn't have anyone else, so he was stuck with Ogata. _Lucky guy_.

A few long moments passed, but Fujiwara kept crying, although more quietly than before. Deciding that Fujiwara wasn't likely to stop anytime soon, Ogata sat down next to Fujiwara, his wrist still firmly ensnared by Fujiwara's long, damp fingers. Ogata felt awkward sitting there doing nothing, so he put his free right hand over the back of Fujiwara's hand and started patting it, simply because of a vague memory of his mother doing the same for him when he was small and confused.

Ogata lost track of time as he continued the patting, lulled by the dim lamplight and his lingering sleepiness into drifting, but gradually Fujiwara's breathing evened out and the shaking ceased, although tears still streaked down his face.

"Do you want to want to talk about it?" Under normal circumstances, Ogata would not ask. But Ogata wouldn't be patting someone's hand under normal circumstances either, so he supposed that asking personal questions could hardly be breaking any worse taboos.

Fujiwara bit at his lip. "I... think so. But I don't understand it."

"That doesn't matter, if you think you'd feel better sharing."

Fujiwara started to turn his head as if to look at Ogata, but then he dropped it again, fixing his gaze on their hands instead. "I... had a dream, but I don't remember all of it. I know that I was with my friend. We were playing go. I remember the game, we didn't get very far... I think because my friend was so tired. I realized he was falling asleep, so I tried to speak to him." Fujiwara gave a sharp sob then, his eyes brimming with fresh tears. "But he didn't answer. He didn't answer! I called and called, but he couldn't hear me anymore! Why didn't he answer?!"

Ogata furrowed his brows together, trying to puzzle out exactly why the dream had upset Fujiwara so much. So he'd been playing go with his friend, and his friend had fallen asleep: perhaps an annoying memory, but not nightmare quality. Unless, Ogata realized with a sensation of dread -

"I just wanted to say goodbye. I remember... I just wanted to say goodbye."

-Fujiwara's friend had died. He had died, so he couldn't hear Fujiwara calling him anymore.

Fujiwara's grasp on Ogata tightened and Ogata winced, but he couldn't bring himself to mention it.

"I think we were very close. Because it hurts so much even though I can't remember his face."

People were supposed to say something in situations like this, weren't they? Ogata's tongue felt heavy in his mouth. "He was playing go with you. I'm sure he was happy."

Fujiwara wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. "Do you really think so?"

"Yes. If I had to... pass on myself, I can't think of a better way to leave than while playing a talented opponent. Especially a friend."

Fujiwara let a shaky breath out. "That doesn't sound too bad, when you phrase it like that. But I wish I could remember him better. I wondered why he... passed on. He was very young."

"How do you know? Do you remember his voice?"

"No, he didn't speak in the dream. But I saw his hands; they were small. He was playing Black."

Ogata nodded. After hearing the description of the nightmare, he had a very good idea about what had triggered it. The neurologist had suggested that exploring Fujiwara's interests might help his memories surface, and obviously the neurologist had been quite correct. Fujiwara's sympathy for that whale's isolation had triggered his memory of his friend's death. Somehow it seemed terribly unfair that the most complete memory Fujiwara had recovered was such a tragic one. Yet, it was perhaps the best lead Fujiwara would get. "Do you remember anything else?" Ogata asked gently.

Fujiwara shook his head. "Not right now." Then Fujiwara's eyes went round as he apparently finally registered that he was indeed gripping Ogata's hand, and he hastily withdrew his hand. "Oh, please excuse me! I didn't mean to grab you like that!"

Fujiwara's apologies only became more profuse when he saw that he had left red marks on Ogata's wrist, and then he started apologizing over having awoken Ogata at such an inconvenient hour. Ogata cut Fujiwara off after he began repeating himself. "I don't have a match or a commitment tomorrow, and I'm hardly a delicate flower. So I give you permission to stop obsessing about it," Ogata said dryly.

"I'm just glad I didn't bruise you," Fujiwara said, embarrassed. "But I suppose you must want to get back to sleep, now..."

Ogata did not miss the note of hesitation in Fujiwara's voice. Fujiwara did not want him to leave, although Ogata knew Fujiwara wouldn't ask him to stay again, thinking he'd already imposed too much on Ogata. "No, I'm mostly awake now. Maybe I'll just take this opportunity to commandeer that book you've been hogging and read in here for awhile."

"It's a very interesting book," Fujiwara said as he retrieved it from his nightstand. "I'm actually rereading it."

"Like I said, hogging it," Ogata said, settling down into the chair near the window.

Fujiwara handed him the book. "You don't need your glasses? I've never seen you not wearing them."

"I'm near-sighted, but I'm perfectly capable of reading a book or a computer screen or a goban without them. It's just inconvenient to need to look at something far away and not have them on, so I usually don't take them off." Ogata hadn't thought about putting them on when he'd been woken up.

"Oh, I see," Fujiwara said, his gaze flickering over Ogata's face with interest.

Ogata flipped the book open to Chapter 6, which was as far as he'd read before he had forgotten the book on the counter and Fujiwara had gleefully made off with it.

He was almost finished with Chapter 6 when he heard the bed covers rustle as Fujiwara slid back under them. Ogata noticed that Fujiwara had chosen to lie on his right side so he was facing Ogata.

By Chapter 9, Fujiwara's eyelids were fluttering shut.

Ogata was puzzling over a passage in Chapter 10 when Fujiwara's voice drifted in, faint and sleep-slurred. "I'll try to not be so weak. I don't want to be a burden."

Ogata looked up sharply over the top of the book. Fujiwara's eyes were closed, and he seemed more asleep than awake. Still, Ogata took time to consider his response. Before he'd met Fujiwara, Ogata would have thought it disdainful for a man to be so openly emotional, willing to laugh or cry easily without reservation. Ogata would have found it especially foolish to expose oneself in a moment of vulnerability like a nightmare. But then there was Fujiwara – Fujiwara, who lacked the knowledge and discernment that his damaged memory couldn't provide. Yet Fujiwara still anticipated new experiences with eagerness instead of dread, and he was also comfortable enough with himself that he didn't find it necessary to censor his emotions. And perhaps there was a strength in being capable of deep trust as well, to have that much faith in another person.

"The only kind of person who's truly weak is a coward who runs from his problems or obligations instead of facing them," Ogata said. "You are neither weak nor a burden. Although you _are_ a shameless book thief and you placed my bookmark God knows where, and some of us don't have an eidetic memory and actually need bookmarks."

The only response Ogata received was the sound of Fujiwara's steady breathing: he'd finally fallen asleep. Ogata shut the book and moved to turn the bedside lamp off, but almost stepped on Fujiwara's hair. Fujiwara was lying too close to the edge of the bed and his hair trailed off the bed, falling onto the floor in long loops. _Your hair might be too long if it presents a roadblock to foot traffic_ , Ogata thought, amused. He'd wanted to ask Fujiwara why he wore his hair so long, but he hadn't, assuming Fujiwara probably wouldn't recall the reason. Maybe Fujiwara simply liked the way his hair looked on him, enough to spend the time required to maintain it. He probably wouldn't be happy if he woke up in the morning and realized that his hair had been on the floor all night.

Ogata decided to be considerate and move Fujiwara's hair. So he could actually reach the table to turn off the lamp, of course. He crouched down and carefully slid his hands through the hair, gathering it up into a bunch to make it easy to pick up. It was soft and felt like silk against Ogata's skin. No wonder Fujiwara wore it long, if it felt that nice against his neck and face. There was enough of it, though, that the hair had some heft, like hair a model would have, Ogata decided, running his fingers through it.

Ogata's ears suddenly grew hot as he realized he was more or less playing with his sleeping roommate's hair, and it would be somewhat awkward to explain if said roommate happened to wake up. He hastily draped the hair over Fujiwara's bed covers, then clicked the lamp off and left the room.

So much for his resolve to eschew attachments.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	56. Chapter 56

Warning : male x male - you have been warned!

 **Chapter 56**

Hikaru slid into his shoes, couldn't wait to leave the Go Institute. He was in a special good mood today; he had just won an Oteai match against a Five-Dan with eightteen and a half moku. Ko Yong Ha's provokation had miraculously brought his determination to play and to win back. And now he was heading to see his Akira again.

"Well I'm sorry but I'm afraid you'll…" The sudden motion off to his left caught the employee's eye, and turning to see what it was, found his voice fading away as Hikaru came into his view. His jaw dropping for a moment before he remembered himself, the employee turned to Hikaru and began, "Sh-Shindo-sensei I-"

"What's going on here?" Hikaru interrupted, his eyes focused on the young man in front of him. The boy glared back up at him with a mix of superiority and frustration in his eyes. Either he had no idea who Hikaru was, didn't care, or Hikaru thought with a silent laugh, both.

"Sensei," the employee said with a fluster in his voice, "this boy wishes to take the insei test for next month, but as I tried to explain to him the deadline has passed and-"

"Who recommended him?" Hikaru interjected again.

"No one did Sensei, he just showed up, no introduction, no game records, nothing. I was just about to-"

"Is he strong?"

"Um, I don't know, I have no way of-"

"Of course I'm strong!" the boy interrupted, the fire in his eyes flaring, "I can pass that test, and I'll turn pro no matter what it takes! I don't care about what he's saying, I just want to take the test!"

It took a bit of effort to keep himself from chuckling at this boy, but he wasn't about to show anything but seriousness to him; he knew what this was like. "You're strong huh? Show me."

"What?"

"There're tables on the next floor where we can play; show me how good you are."

As he turned to leave the boy shouted back, "Why should I show you how strong I am?!"

Turning back to gaze at the boy levelly, Hikaru answered calmly, "Who I am doesn't matter, what does matter is that if you want to take the exam, you'll have to play me first. Now let's go."

With that Hikaru turned and moved for the door, leaving the boy frozen momentarily until at last he begrudgingly moved to follow. Grimacing as he stared at Hikaru's back, he had to push back the urge to jump out and give Hikaru a good right hook. The idea certainly had a nice sound to it, but if what this person had told him was true, that he couldn't take the insei test unless he played him, then he dared not risk it. There was too much on the line for that, not if he wanted to keep his promise.

Making their way into the main lobby and around to the stairs leading to the 2nd floor, a fire that matched his hair began to burn within the boy. Who did this guy think he was anyway? The man at the counter had called him sensei, so it seemed likely that the person in front of him was a young pro. If so, this was the first time he'd ever encountered a pro in person, although his older brother had once taken him to see a pro match being played.

Sadly there were very few pros whose names the boy knew, and this guy, Hikaru he thought the man at the counter had called him, he did not recognize. Of course, of the younger pros there was only one name that he did know, a player his brother had once described as being a talent beyond the ability of words to describe. Well, perhaps this was a good thing after all, beating this pro would be his first step toward greatness; if this Shindo wanted to know how strong he was, he'd just have to demonstrate.

Reaching the top of the stairs and turning to make a beeline for the playing tables, Hikaru turned his gaze to the woman at the desk and said, "We're going to play over in the corner."

Raising his gaze to meet his opponent, Hikaru observed the defiant fire in front of him then smiled coyly and replied, "You don't think you need a handicap? I'm sure you don't, but why not humor me this one time huh?"

The boy lost, of course. But Hikaru found the match to be quite satisfying. Though the boy was not particularly strong, he definitely made some surprising good moves.

"Thank you for the game." With that, Hikaru began to sort the stones on the board into groups, clearing them back into their bowls. Normally he'd discuss the game a bit and make pointers on where he had gone wrong, but he'd glanced up at the clock and seen the time, and thus had no time for reviews. Placing the lid back on his bowl, Hikaru then said, "I have to be somewhere now, but the next time we play, I promise you we'll discuss it afterwards. Now let's go."

"Shindo-sensei, you're back, what can I-"

"I would like to give this young player my recommendation, so I'd appreciate it if you'd see to it that he's allowed to take the insei exam."

The man behind the counter gave a dumbstruck look, and fidgeted slightly as he seemed to be in a mental debate between appeasement and trying to explain to Hikaru Shindo 2 – Dan how the rules worked. "Shindo-sensei, as I said, the deadline-"

"I understand that," Hikaru interrupted, "but it would really mean a lot to me if you'd kindly make an exception and take care of everything for Sakamoto here."

Pausing a moment, the man then exhaled and said, "Very well then, if that's what Shindou-sensei said, then I'll see to it."

"Thank you." Hikaru replied, then turning to leave glanced at the little boy and said, "I'm looking forward to our rematch."

With those words Hikaru exited the room, his back watched closely by Sakamoto even after he left his view. Turning his gaze then to the man across the counter who was eyeing him contemptuously, Sakamoto said, "Who… who was that guy?"

"G-guy!? You don't know Hikaru Shindo 2 – Dan?"

Hikaru Shindo 2 – Dan, so that was his rank. Was that really the strength of a 2 – Dan? But then why would this man be getting worked up over a 2 – Dan? "I didn't know his rank, but he told me his name. Is he like, famous or something?"

The man was even more dumbstruck than he was by Hikaru's request. How in the world had this boy gotten Shindou Hikaru to recommend him?

###

"Good evening, Shindou-kun!" it was Hirumi, breaking in on his thoughts with her habitual cheerfulness.

"Good evening," he said, taking off his bag and handing it to her. "Is Akira here?"

"He's in the back, waiting for you."

Hikaru nodded and left her desk, heading towards their usual table.

"Hikaru, how was your game today?"

"Was great. I won by eighteen moku an a half". Hikaru beamed.

"Did the game take very long?" Akira asked, a slight annoyance note in his tone.

"Not at all. But I got something to do after the match. Sort of paying back a debt, you know."

The pair then set down the stones to start a game. Their fingers sometimes brushed lightly over the goban while collecting stone, causing a flash of heat running through Hikaru's body. Akira however seemed unaffected; he was as calm as ever.

There were some patrons standing aroud their table, watching their play and making comments. Hikaru tried not to feel resentful, but he couldn't help it: how could those geezers just listen in on private conversations? How could they just shamelessly stand around and discuss his and Akira's games? Couldn't they see they were not wanted? He wanted to touch Akira more, but it was not possible… not like this, not with people constantly staring at them. The irritation got too much and Hikaru sometimes felt like he'd like to start a fight.

However, Hikaru found out soon enough that Akira was not as unaffected as he seemed. The two had been playing for some hours, there had been a lot of green tea, and Hikaru felt a certain degree of pressure on his bladder.

"I need the toilet," he said, getting to his feet. Akira nodded, and then an expression Hikaru couldn't quite interpret flashed over his face.

"I'll come with you," he said, getting up.

"I thought only girls did that," Hikaru said, heading towards the toilets; Akira didn't say anything until they were at their destination. Hikaru walked towards the nearest stall; the place seemed empty.

"Hikaru, wait." A hand was at his shoulder, and he turned, surprised.

"What is it?"

"I..." Akira seemed at a loss, his expression confused. Abruptly, without warning, he stepped closer, throwing both arms around Hikaru's shoulders, in an awkward hug. "I miss you."

"Oh." He didn't quite know what to say, so he said nothing, returning the hug with at least as much clumsiness as Akira had displayed. He had missed touching him, too. Akira adjusted his grasp, slipping closer into their embrace, leaning against him and resting his head on Hikaru's shoulder.

Neither of them said anything. The moment was too fragile, and the potential for pitfalls too great. Closing his eyes, Hikaru concentrated on breathing slowly, on not panicking.  
A hand was stroking Hikaru's back. He wasn't sure if it was in response to the tight tension in his muscles or not, but it did help him relax. He breathed, shakily, hugging Akira tighter, inhaling the scent of freshly-washed cotton and clean hair. Akira's body was warm and oddly familiar against his own. He had yearned to touch Akira. And Akira, he realised, had yearned to touch him, too. He took his courage and cup Akira's chin in his palm, and raised Akira's face to kiss him. Hikaru's body grew hot, and something inside fimlally meleted free. Akira lightly cried out at the tickling sweetnes. When their eyes met, Hikaru gave a shy smile, and pressed the tip of his nose against Akira's nose in a playful way.

"I miss you too, Akira! I missed you more!"

"Did not" – Akira laughed, broke the tension down a bit.

"Did too!" Hikaru cried back while nestling his face on Akira's soft hair. _God it felt good..._

"Idiot!" Akira lightly smacked on Hikaru's shoulder. He remember Weekly Go once compared Hikaru to a tiger and the Go board his hunting field, but whenever he's with Akira, the tiger disappeared – in fact, he acted no less silly than a monkey.

"Come to my house tomorrow, Hikaru! My parents are still in China." Akira said with the softest voice Hikaru'd ever heard, looking deep into Hikaru's jade green eyes.

"No, I won't…" Silence. "Why can't I come…tonight?"

There was the sound of a door opening, and they looked up as the door to another stall closed. Then there was a steady trickling sound, and a deep elderly sigh of relief, followed by a few rumbly coughs. Their eyes met, and Hikaru saw his amusement reflected in Akira's eyes. They opened the door and left the room as quietly as they could.

###

Credits to: Leitbur (The never-ending road) and stirring-still (Preliminaries)


	57. Chapter 57

_**Warning**_ _: this chapter contains 18+ and yaoi (male x male) materials. Please DO NOT READ if you're under 18 or dislike yaoi. You have been warned!_

 **Chapter 57**

The train to Akira's took actually only twelve minutes, yet it felt like forever to Hikaru. Akira sat next to him, their legs lightly leaned on each other's. To fight the urge to touch and kiss Akira right on the train, he tried to keep his gaze instead on a young woman in a low-cut dress. She was attractive, there was no doubt about it: firm rounded boobs, long well-defined legs, shiny lustrous hair. He felt a pleasant twitch between his legs.

And yet...

His gaze moved back to Akira, who was looking out the window. The slight twist of his neck meant that one of the sinews stood out, throwing the hollow at the base of his throat into deep shadow. Hikaru nearly whimpered. He closed his eyes and wondered how Akira would react if he kissed and licked his collarbone right now. Not to mention how the train full of people would react. He shivered, clenching his hands, morbidly curious as to when the tension would snap, and how.

###

Hikaru didn't have to wait long for the answer: the second Akira closed the entrance door, he leaned in and pull Akira against the door and kiss him passionately. As Akira's lips met his Hikaru thought for one beautiful moment that it was the end of the world, because Akira was slipping his tounge in between his teeth and passionately kissing him back and nothing could ever, can ever top this, ever.

The next twenty-five minutes were a blur of teeth and tongues and groping and Akira's fingernails digging into his back and Akira's collarbone tasting just as good as Hikaru's been imagining it would, and Akira's voice going all throaty and purry and his skin was like on fire and turning Hikaru on the way he'd never ever been before. Hikaru laid his hand on the the buttons of Akira's shirt when Akira gasped, "Wait—Hikaru—let's get inside!"

Akira took his hand leading the way back to the bedroom. Hikaru's legs kept wanting to shake, but he forced himself to walk normally, his grip on Akira's hand damp and slippery. The bedroom door, when they got to it, seemed like a cavern, a threatening and unpredictable place. The room was very dark, despite the full moon outside. Hikaru kicked off the slippers and entered the room barefoot, wondering if he was going to faint. It would solve a lot of things, probably.

"Akira, do you want…to…with me…?" Hikaru heard himself trembling.

"Yes," Akira nodded, looking away again, and put his bag on the floor before slipping his jacket off. It was the sexiest and most frightening thing Hikaru had ever seen him do. "I've dreamt of this a thousand time before." Akira said, beginning to take off his shirt.

His rival was undressing slowly, systematically, pausing to fold his clothes every step of the way. Hikaru stared, wondering if he ought to be ashamed of himself for doing so. His eyes were adjusting to the darkness of the room, and followed the shape of sinewy muscles and sharp bones. Akira was very thin, without a lot of muscle, and the moonlight created dark hollows under his shoulder blades and along his throat. Hikaru was so hard it was painful, and if this slow undressing went on for very much longer, he might come just from looking.

He closed his eyes, trying to think of unsexy things. Kuwabara. Kuwabara-sensei having sex with Morishita-sensei. He shuddered, and opened his eyes again, to find that Akira had just taken off his socks and was now working on getting his belt open. Hikaru whimpered, the sound loud in the silence, and Akira looked over at him.

"Come to bed," Hikaru whispered, not caring that he was pleading. Akira paused for a moment, then nodded, pushing his trousers and underpants down in one abrupt movement, stepping out of them and leaving them on the floor, walking over to the futon. It happened so quickly that he was under the covers before Hikaru had time to get a proper look at him, and he was left with a confused impression of an extra-dark pool of shadows and reflected moonlight.

They both held still for a moment, to give each other the chance to escape, or to give themselves the chance to think of something that might stop what they were doing, that might enable them to pretend this had never happened. Then they turned onto their sides and inched closer, until they were facing each other, a few centimetres of space between them. Akira's eyes seemed huge and very dark, and Hikaru couldn't make out his expression.

Wetting his lips nervously, he reached out, brushing fingertips over Akira's chest. That seemed to be enough, and Akira reached for him, pressing against him, their bodies suddenly rammed hard against each other. Hikaru gasped at the shock of naked skin against his own, and clutched at Akira's shoulders.

Akira was aroused. Very aroused. Hikaru barely had time to wonder what he was supposed to do next before his body took over, moving against Akira, who responded in kind. It was all messy and urgent , and there were sounds: grunts of effort, sharp sudden gasps, and small desperate keening noises as their need grew out of control. They embraced, their arms around each other, and ran their palms up and down backs and arms. Hikaru placed his face against Akira's collarbone and kissed it so feverently to the point he bit it at times.

At some point, they somehow lost their balance, and Hikaru ended up on his back, with Akira on top of him. But by then, it was far too late to stop, and Akira was grinding down hard against him, his head lifted and his gaze on Hikaru. His face was framed by curtains of soft hair, and his lips were parted, and his hips were warm and naked under Hikaru's hands, and he kept looking at him, and he was the most beautiful thing Hikaru had ever seen, and suddenly the world exploded in a shower of sparks and desperate gasping for breath.

When the ground stopped spinning, he opened his eyes again. Akira was slumped against him, still mostly on top of him, and there was dampness between their bodies: some of it sweat, some of it come. He closed his eyes, trying to understand that some of that come was Akira's. On his skin, on his body. He tensed, flashes of something that felt like arousal shivering along his spine.

He wanted more. He wanted more right now. He rolled onto his side, then stroked his arm. His palm, or Akira's arm, was slightly damp with sweat. Akira looked up, and this time it was possible to make out an expression. He looked quizzical.

"Again," Hikaru explained, pressing closer, sliding his hands along Akira's back.

Akira said nothing, but his body replied urgently to every of Hikaru's rather daring, Hikaru lifted his head, watching Akira's face for a moment, before deliberately glancing down at their bodies, at the way their skin glistened in the cold light. Akira exhaled, sharply, sounding out of breath and somehow close to laughter, though not the amused kind of laughter. Hikaru looked back at him, meeting his eyes, acutely conscious that he, too, was moving, was rubbing himself against his rival's naked body.

He leaned forward, resting his forehead against Akira's, their sweat mingling. Akira's eyes were open and looking straight at him, and Hikaru didn't look away. Akira was breathing quickly, his lips parted again, his every exhalation hot against Hikaru's face. This was too good, there was no way anything could be this good, it couldn't be legal. Hikaru's eyes flickered, and he bit his lip, forcing himself not to moan.

"Can I -" Akira's voice was hoarse, and he stopped, clearing his throat. Hikaru focused his gaze on him again, and Akira swallowed, audibly. "Can I touch you?" He already was, his hands were clutching at Hikaru's back, but Hikaru understood what he meant. He nodded, looking away.

A hand slid between their bodies and wrapped around Hikaru's erection. He closed his eyes, hiding his head under Akira's chin as the hand began to move. It felt... he wasn't sure how it felt, only that it was different from everything ever, and that the world would end if Akira stopped.

He also reached down, fumbling for Akira's arousal, grasping it clumsily, a move that made both of them gasp. Adjusting his grip, he tried to move his hand, finding the angle difficult. When he lifted his head, to keep his part of the bargain, Akira's eyes had closed. He gasped, moving his hand faster, pressing into Akira's touch. Underneath him, Akira moaned and twitched and clung to the bedlinen with both hands, then threw his head back and cried out as he came, his body arching up towards Hikaru. He scooped up Akira's lower back and lifted him up in his arms. Holding Akira close to his chest like a precious thing, he gently kissed Akira again.

"Akira, this is my first time. I'm glad I've done it with you "

They were silent for a long time afterwards, the sounds from the garden drifting in and mingling with the sound of their breathing, their skin gradually cooling in the night air. After a while, Akira reached for the bedclothes and pulled it over them, then wrapped one arm around Hikaru's waist. Hikaru hugged him back tightly, pressing gentle kisses onto his hair, to his forehead, his cheeks, his lips, and then settled down, getting ready for sleep.

###

 ** _Credits to_** _: Stirring-still ( Preliminaries)_


	58. Chapter 58

**Chapter 58**

Waya clacked the last stone onto the goban, then leaned back on his palms, grinning at the expression of wide-eyed amazement on Isumi's face.

"White is the man you've been playing at Iwamoto?" Isumi asked, his voice hesitant as if he could barely believe it.

"Yeah, it's him." Waya said with a nonchalant shrug, as if playing a title-level player were a regular occurrence. "Chips?"

Isumi waved the proffered bag away. "Waya... that you could go so far against this player is impressive."

Waya felt his cheeks heat up at Isumi's sincere and unexpected praise: even though he was technically Isumi's "senpai" on account of passing the pro exam a year earlier, Waya had never stopped desiring Isumi's approval. "Well, I still lost by seven moku."

"The quality of a game can't be measured in just moku count, especially not when your opponent is so much more experienced." Isumi gestured to the 3-3 coordinates where White had played a keima with particular effectiveness. "This looks like something Kuwabara-sensei or Ogata-sensei would play. It's hard to imagine this person isn't a pro." Isumi tilted his head to regard Waya contemplatively. "Are you certain that he isn't a Chinese pro on vacation, studying abroad like I did?"

Waya stretched back lazily, wriggling his toes against the tatami as he considered Isumi's question. "Nah, no way he's Chinese. I saw him studying a Chinese textbook once, and why would a Chinese guy need to study Chinese? Anyway, even if he was a Chinese pro, wouldn't he be studying at the Go Association instead of hanging around some little salon? 'Sides, his Japanese is better than mine. He uses all this keigo and crap. Isumi-san. I think he is….Sai."

There was a pause for several seconds as Waya's words sunk in, then Isumi's jaw dropped open. "You don't mean... this is Sai?!"

###

"Yep! I'll show you some other games we've played, but yeah, I've got little doubt about it."

Isumi smiled broadly. "I can't believe you just happened to bump into Sai in that salon. I have to confess that I'm really curious about what he's like, after hearing you go on about him so much. Now that he has come back, I might write Yang Hai-san and I bet he'd catch the first flight he could -"

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea right now." Waya interfered.

The smile faded from Isumi's face at Waya's serious tone. "There was a reason you didn't tell us about Sai sooner."

Waya leaned forward, resting his hands on his knees. "Yeah, well, for starters, Fujiwara-san has never exactly admitted to _being Sai_. He's secretive. Most people don't notice because he's friendly and a chatterbox, but if you ask him questions about himself – like where he lives or what he does - he doesn't really answer the question. And then there's the question of why he hasn't gone pro; he's good enough to take some titles – actually, he's good enough to take any title he wants. He loves go, and he could earn a lot of money playing it. So why not do it unless he wants to stay hidden? _Has to_ stay hidden?"

###

"Waya!" Isumi scolded. "You're making it sound like he's a criminal. It's hardly fair to assume something like that on pure conjecture when he probably just has other obligations. And he has to be too old to take the pro exam, with as much experience as he has."

"He's barely older than you! He said he was in his twenties, and he looks it, too."

Isumi blinked, looking stunned again. "A guy our age outread _Touya Meijin_? I know you're telling the truth, but it's just hard to believe. Unreal." Isumi shook his head. "I feel like I need to start working harder now," he admitted with a small laugh.

Waya grinned. "Well, why don't you come with me to the Iwamoto salon? I'm meeting him on tomorow morning. You're free then, right?"

"Yes... but do you think it would be okay with Fujiwara-san? I don't want to make him uncomfortable."

Waya rolled his eyes. "You couldn't scare a kitten if you _tried._ Anyway, he'll be thrilled to have a new opponent, and he only gets nervous if people ask him a lot of questions."

"I'd be happy to come along, but why do I get the feeling you've got something up your sleeve?" Isumi eyed the other pro suspiciously.

" 'Cause I always do!" Waya said cheerfully. "People just _love_ Isumi-san. He'll probably just start chattering his whole life story to you before you reach chuuban. Remember that housewife on the train to Nagano? It's like people meet you and suddenly you're their new best friend or something."

Isumi's cheeks flushed bright red. "I think she was just lonely, and you're exaggerating. Regardless, I am _not_ going along with you to pump him for information. I respect his rights to his privacy."

"She shared her homemade cookies with you! And I'm not asking you to pry. Just be yourself and everything will fall into place."

"You're absolutely shameless, Waya," Isumi grumbled, trying and failing to sound disapproving.

Waya smirked. It was mostly true.

###

During the train ride to Shinjuku, Waya had warned Isumi that Fujiwara could be a very intimidating opponent. (Well, actually Waya had said "right before he's about to trounce you, his eyes do that psycho cat thing just like Touya!", his fingers curled into claws as he swiped at the air much to the disconcertment of the other passengers). Isumi had just nodded absently; the younger player _had_ always been prone to a bit of exaggeration.

Now that the mid-game clash had begun, however, Isumi was beginning to think that Waya hadn't been exaggerating at all. With his face half-concealed by a folding fan, eyes sharp with anticipation, Fujiwara-san did rather bear a resemblance to a stalking cat. _Definitely a predator_ , Isumi thought after Fujiwara responded to Isumi's last move almost instantly, as if he'd been coiled for the attack during Isumi's entire turn. Despite the apparent haste of the move, Isumi could see that Black's position was brilliant and well-planned.

Isumi found himself shrinking back mentally. It wasn't that Isumi lacked experience playing strong players, but Fujiwara's strength was... in an entirely different class. Black encircled White all over the goban, like hungry lionesses moving in for the kill. Isumi had thought he'd been responding to Fujiwara's hands fairly well, but perhaps he'd just been deluding himself, thinking that he could face Fujiwara on somewhat equal footing since he had studied Fujiwara's kifu.

Studying **Sai'** s kifu was nothing compared to playing him; now that Isumi was facing him, he could sense the true depth of the other man's go.

Isumi felt like he might drown.

His head suddenly felt too heavy for his neck, and Isumi looked down into his lap, eyes unseeing. He hadn't felt so overwhelmed since he'd been struggling to pass the pro exams. Perhaps he'd just been overestimating himself, to think he actually had a chance against a player of such caliber.

 _But I_ **did** _pass_. Isumi seized that small, warm thought like an anchor. _I did pass. Undefeated. I won my Shin Shodan match. I've played many fine players during my professional career, and I'm proud of those games. I'm proud of myself. Of my go._

Isumi lifted his head to look at the board again. The stones were still in the same positions, but somehow the patterns seemed... different. It wasn't an impending slaughter precipitated by a gross imbalance of skill, but instead a dialogue between Black and White, a wordless exchange laid out in stones, each carefully and precisely chosen like syllables in haiku.

 _It looks like a dance_ , Isumi thought, a sensation of wonder spreading through him. Yes, Black was definitely the more skilled and experienced of the two; that was undeniable. But Black wasn't executing a plan to ruthlessly dominate the board; instead, Black was responding to White's moves with a delicate sensitivity. Black's patterns were particularly beautiful in the areas where White had played especially well.

Isumi felt his breath hitch: those exquisite patterns on the board were as much a result of _his_ go as Fujiwara's. He glanced up to meet Fujiwara's eyes. The expression in them was no less sharp than earlier, but now Isumi could see another emotion: satisfaction. A genuine satisfaction at a game well-matched.

A tiny smile tugged at Isumi's lips, and he could tell Fujiwara was returning the smile behind that fan. Then the other man inclined his head towards the board in a wordless query. _Shall we continue?_

Isumi's smile broadened and he answered with a stone, decisively clacking it into a bold position. Fujiwara's eyebrows arched, and Isumi waited for his response eagerly.

As the game continued, Isumi allowed his stones to flow naturally, trusting in his instincts more than the kifu he'd analyzed. Knowledge gleaned from kifu was valuable, but only to an extent. A real conversation wasn't scripted.

When there was nothing left to say, Isumi dipped his head. "Makemashita," he said, feeling simultaneously content and eager to play again. _To play an even better game_.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	59. Chapter 59

**Chapter 59**

Fujiwara and Isumi were bowing at each other now, so the game was obviously finished. Waya sighed mentally as he glanced at them out of the corner of his eye; he'd really been hoping to watch the entire exchange, blow-by-blow, but some of the customers had waylaid him before the mid-game to ask him for his opinion on their game. It _was_ flattering to be sought out for advice, but he'd been looking forward to watching Isumi play Fujiwara all week. Still, hearing the post-game discussion would be just as enlightening. Fujiwara was particularly good at explaining games, and Isumi had always been like a patient older brother, willing to elaborate on even his own mistakes if it would benefit someone else.

Waya managed to escape in time to hear Isumi deflecting praise. "No, I still have a lot to learn," Isumi said, his cheeks tinted red.

"You seemed to have reached a decision around the mid-game," Fujiwara said, gesturing with his fan. "Before that, your hands were sometimes stiff, but afterwards your responses became much more intuitive."

"I was feeling a little worried at that point, but I managed to regain my focus. You're a very strong player."

Waya stared at the black and white patterns curling across the goban in astonishment. He'd played Fujiwara many times, but _never_ in a game like this. "You really went all out on Isumi-san, didn't you?" Waya demanded, his voice rising in pitch.

"It's Waya-sensei's fault!" Fujiwara said, raising his floppy jacket sleeve to his mouth to conceal a laugh. "You've been telling me that 'Isumi-san is really strong!' so I couldn't help getting excited. Besides, it was really fun, wasn't it, Isumi-san?"

"Except for the part where I lost," Isumi said with a grin.

"You never play me like that," Waya muttered under his breath as he continued to admire the patterns. He couldn't help feeling jealous – of both of them. He wanted to play games of that quality with _both_ Fujiwara and Isumi. But Waya knew his depth of reading just wasn't strong enough to play an entire game at that level yet. Waya grumpily wondered _when_ it would be - he'd asked Morishita-sensei that very question, and the older man had counseled patience and practice (before smacking him with a fan for being petulant.)

"Is there a way I could have turned the game in my favor after the midpoint?" Isumi asked Fujiwara. "It seems obvious that the gap had already become too wide by that stage, but I can't shake the feeling that there's something I'm overlooking."

Fujiwara tapped his fan against his lips. "What is your intuition telling you?"

Fujiwara, Waya had found, often preferred to answer questions with questions. It could be annoying when Waya just wanted the answer right away, but on the other hand, Waya had occasionally managed to produce a few surprisingly good solutions while being questioned. Waya supposed it was more or less like shidougo, except nudging the errant student onto the correct path with words instead of stones.

"Here, at 9-12. I feel that there's a way to strengthen my position with a connection," said Isumi with a frown.

Fujiwara acknowledged Isumi's speculation with a nod. "A kirikomi at 9-15 would have allowed a connection in about six hands, after you had played at 10-16. It's unusual enough play that your opponent likely wouldn't realize in time to cut you off. Unusual - but strong."

Isumi's eyebrows shot up. "If White makes no other mistakes after this move, then it _is_ possible for White to make up the difference in moku," he said quickly. "And if White plays Shuusaku's kosumi over here, it can even benefit from the influence of the connection."

"Exactly!" Fujiwara beamed. "If you keep studying the board, you'll probably discover a few other possibilities. Perhaps the next time we play, you'll tell me what they are?"

"I would be honored to play you again. Please continue to instruct me," Isumi said, bowing, and Waya rolled his eyes. Isumi was so damned formal, but it _was_ part of his very convenient charm.

"I would enjoy that very much," Fujiwara said. "I wish I had time to play you again today, and Waya-sensei too, but I'm afraid I should leave soon. I'm meeting a friend."

"Oh, I hope I didn't detain you too long," Isumi said, reaching for stones to sort. "If you'd like, Waya and I can clean up here."

"That's alright," said Fujiwara, beginning to clear the stones as well. "We're meeting in Shinjuku, so I don't have far to travel. And where are you travelling to from here?"

"I'm going back to Ichigaya since I don't have any games today. It's convenient because it's close to the Go Association, but it's a bit boring."

"By boring, Isumi-san means he still lives with his _parents_ ," Waya informed Fujiwara with an impish smirk as he made a show of patting Isumi on the shoulder consolingly. " _I've_ been living in my own place for two years." Waya knew it was childish to tease Isumi in front of Fujiwara, but somehow he couldn't resist... maybe, Waya admitted to himself, he was just _a little_ resentful of always feeling like he was standing in Isumi's shadow.

" _Waya!_ It's not that I don't want to move out, but you know I don't have any siblings."

Fujiwara nodded quickly. "Ah, it's natural for a mother to keep her only child close. Now if you want to move to an exciting place, Shinjuku is certainly busy, although sometimes it's too crowded. But I usually enjoying walking around and looking at all the buildings and the interesting people. There are many people from other countries; it's quite exciting, especially when they're speaking other languages."

Isumi smiled at the other man's exuberance. "Oh, so you must have moved to Shinjuku recently, then."

"Yes, that's right. It seems I see something new every day!"

"Was the place you lived before so busy?"

Fujiwara's expression clouded. "I don't remember the last place I lived so well. I'm sorry."

Isumi bowed again. "No, I should be the one to apologize. I didn't mean to pry when we've just been introduced."

"Oh no, don't apologize!" Fujiwara exclaimed, waving his hands about, looking flustered. "You didn't do anything wrong. I've just had some... memory issues. It seems I suffered a head injury, although I don't recall it exactly."

"I'm very sorry to hear that. I wish you the best in your recovery," Isumi said in a low, sincere voice, then when Waya didn't say anything, he nudged Waya urgently with his foot from under the table.

"Uh, me too! Get better soon," Waya said hastily, and Fujiwara thanked them for their kind wishes.

So he'd been right after all, Waya thought, vindicated: Isumi _was_ the magic key to getting Fujiwara to open up. But Waya wasn't certain how much of it he believed. Certainly not the memory part; that just seemed like an incredibly convenient excuse to get out of answering just about any question. If Fujiwara had really been whacked on the head or hit by a car or something crazy like that, wouldn't he have problems speaking or walking too?

The stones were returned to their goke, and then Isumi and Fujiwara exchanged cell phone information, discussing plans to meet again.

"I look forward to seeing you both!" Fujiwara called cheerfully as he exited the salon with a wave, all traces of his earlier agitation gone.

###

"What a nice man. I hope he's able to regain his memories," Isumi said as they picked up their belongings.

"You don't actually believe that, do you?" Waya asked, incredulous. "You're too trusting. It's just a part of his plan to keep people from finding out he's **Sai** and that he's also like, a chainsaw murderer or something."

" _Waya_!"

"Okay, maybe income tax evasion, or embezzling. He's probably smart enough to pull it off," Waya said, angling his head in consideration. "So of course, he knows the minute his picture starts getting printed in _Go Weekly_ , he's going straight to jail."

Isumi sighed. "Perhaps you should stop watching so many yakuza movies. It's corrupting your imagination." Then his voice softened. "Maybe you should just enjoy playing with Fujiwara-san and not worry about his personal life. People all have different motivations for playing go. You can't just make assumptions about why he's not a pro."

Isumi's quiet rebuke stung Waya more than he wanted to admit. It made Waya feel like he was still a brash, clueless kid who had disappointed his senpai again. "Yeah, okay. It's not like I'm going to _do_ anything to him. I'm just curious. Why are you worried, anyway? You just met him."

"He seems sensitive," was all Isumi would say in answer. The older pro fixed his eyes firmly ahead then, as if maneuvering down the busy sidewalk required his full attention.

Waya knew Isumi well enough not to press the issue. By the time they reached the station, Isumi would probably bring up some completely unrelated subject and they'd chat about it lightly as if they hadn't had a disagreement. Isumi enjoyed teasing, but anything remotely resembling arguing made him anxious. Waya, on the other hand, personally relished a good argument, but he could respect Isumi's wishes. He decided not to bring up the subject of Fujiwara's hypothetical secret life to Isumi again.

That didn't mean Waya was going to stop trying to figure out a way to crack the mystery of **Sai** , though. Not in a million years. The desire to know – the _need_ to know - had gripped him before he'd even made pro, and the desire had only grown stronger since meeting Fujiwara. He _had_ to know, and he was going to figure out a way to get his answers.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	60. Chapter 60

**Chapter 60**

Fujiwara gradually became more open about himself during the following meetings, his initial reserve fading as he played more games with Isumi and Waya. The things Fujiwara chatted about were mostly inconsequential: what his fish had been doing, fascinating things he'd seen around Tokyo, and an old Chinese lady he seemed to adore (but whom Waya thought sounded frankly terrifying). All of these tales were related with a lot of unnecessary detail, but Waya still listened with particular attentiveness, waiting for the inevitable slip-up. In Waya's experience, the bigger the lie, the harder it was for the fibber in question to maintain the lie over time.

Yet the more Waya learned about Fujiwara, the more Fujiwara's claim actually seemed to make sense in a weird way. It wasn't really anything Fujiwara had _said_ , but rather the way he acted around other people. Sometimes the other customers would start chatting about non-go related things, boring crap like mortgages and health insurance and politics, and Fujiwara would become uncharacteristically quiet, mostly just listening and nodding, and only responding with a generic, noncommittal answer if asked for input ("It certainly seems that way," "I know what you mean," etc). But Waya didn't get the impression that Fujiwara was bored with the conversations and faking interest – his eyes looked keen, as if he were absorbing the information for later analysis. Like Fujiwara really _had_ lost his memory, and was trying to re-learn as much as possible.

All the observations, however, didn't do Waya much good in the end game. He still didn't know anything about how **Sai** had come to be, and why he'd mysteriously appeared on the Internet and just as mysteriously disappeared after his crowning achievement of defeating the world's top go player. One would think **s a i** would have stuck around at least a little after _that_ , if only to bask in the glory of his victory.

It was definitely time to play his trump card, Waya thought, fingering the clear file in his hands. Inside were three kifu he'd recorded himself. The first was a match he had recently played against **L-L** , China's top amateur. Waya had lost, but only after a fierce struggle that had lasted well into yose. The second was his only game as **zelda** against **Sai**. The last - the infamous match of **Sai** versus **touya kouyo**. There were no identifying marks on the kifu – no net handles, no dates, nothing except black and red circles with move numbers. By the time Fujiwara realized exactly what he was looking at, it would be too late for him to hide his reaction, and Waya had no doubt he'd be able to read Fujiwara's very expressive face easily. There would be no way for Fujiwara to deny the uncanny resemblance between his playing style and **Sai** 's.

###

Waya arrived at the Iwamoto Go Salon and glanced around, but Fujiwara wasn't there yet. Waya decided to claim a table near the back, at a safe distance from the rest of the other customers. Then he put the clear file on the table, where Fujiwara couldn't help noticing it.

A few minutes later, Fujiwara arrived and they exchanged greetings as Fujiwara removed his jacket. Waya wrinkled his nose at the sudden acrid smell wafting across the table. Waya's own clothes often smelled after a visit to a go salon, but the jacket smelled like Fujiwara had been chain-smoking. "I didn't think you smoked, Fujiwara-san."

Fujiwara looked puzzled. "I don't," he said, sniffing delicately at one of the jacket sleeves. "Ehh, I suppose it does smell smoky. I hadn't noticed."

"Maybe you're just spending too much time here," Waya said, grinning.

"Does my hair smell too?" Fujiwara said worriedly, holding a lock up for inspection. "That would be awful! It's not that I _mind_ smoke, but I do _mind_ if my hair is smelly. See, I use this really nice strawberry-oh, what's that?" Fujiwara pointed to the conspicuous clear file eagerly, like he'd just spotted candy.

Hook, line, and sinker. "These are some kifu I've recorded," Waya said casually, even though his pulse had started to race. "I played in two of the games so I've been reviewing them. Did you want to look?"

"Of course!" Fujiwara cheerfully accepted the file and took the **L-L** game out, falling silent as his eyes flickered over the kifu rapidly. Waya watched Fujiwara's face anxiously for signs of approval. Although the game had been included only as a part of Waya's pretext, he _was_ proud of the game and eager to hear Fujiwara's opinion.

After a few minutes, Fujiwara looked up with a smile. "You're White in this one. Nice opening. It forced Black to react too strongly here. He's certainly talented, though. Is he a professional also?"

"No, that's Lee Linshin. He's an amateur from China, and he's won the World Amateur Go Cup several times. What do you think about this ko exchange here?" Waya said, pointing to the left quadrant.

"It's very interesting! Although, if White had placed a stone here first, it would have been more efficient."

They continued discussing the rough spots in the game, and Waya was glad he'd had the foresight to think of all his game-related questions beforehand because he could barely concentrate now, unable to stop thinking about what Fujiwara's reaction would be when he realized Waya was onto him. Would he be angry? Waya had never seen the other man looking even the slightest bit grumpy, but for all Waya knew, that was just a part of Fujiwara's false persona. Surreptitiously, Waya dropped his hands to his lap so he could rub his sweating palms against his blue jeans.

"It's a good, solid game overall, but remember to watch the corners more carefully," Fujiwara said, pulling out the next kifu quickly, as if he could barely contain his curiosity. "Oh Waya-sensei, you didn't get very far in this one!" he said with a gentle laugh after he glanced at the kifu. "You resigned before mid-game!"

 _A mid-game resignation?_ That meant... Fujiwara was reading the **zelda** \- **s a i** match. Waya felt his heart thudding solidly against his chest. He forced himself to keep a steady voice as he responded to Fujiwara: "Geez, that game was played before I even became a pro. I was comparing it to that match with Lee to see how much I've improved, and what I still need to work on. Take it easy on me, okay?"

"I thought you wanted me to go harder on you so you could catch up to Isumi-san," Fujiwara said, smiling and looking down at the kifu again. "I could tell immediately that you were Black because your opening style hasn't changed too much. Although of course your play is more refined now; you've become better at calculating risk as your style has matured, and your ability to read ahead has increased." Fujiwara tapped his fan against his lips in consideration. "Your moves here are solid, but White is a truly superb player. You were out-classed from the start. With such a large difference in skill and no handicap, the outcome-"

Fujiwara's voice broke off, and his eyes went large. "White... White is..."

Waya dug his fingers into his jeans as a wave of adrenaline shot through his body. Now was the moment of truth.

"This doesn't make sense. I don't understand. But..."

"Fujiwara-san, are you okay?" The kifu was _shaking_ in the other man's hands, and his eyes had taken on a glassy sheen.

Fujiwara didn't respond for several long moments, staring off into space as if he'd forgotten about Waya. "Black is... definitely Waya, but not the Waya of now. This is still a child's play. This is an old game. Yet White, there's no question," Fujiwara murmured to himself.

Waya swallowed thickly. He was starting to feel just a little freaked out. He'd been anticipating a strong reaction from Fujiwara, but he hadn't thought Fujiwara would stage a breakdown in _if he isn't lying?_ That stray thought made Waya shift uncomfortably in his seat.

Fujiwara took a deep, ragged breath then, his vision clearing as he seemingly snapped out of his trance. He set the kifu down carefully on the table and laced his trembling fingers together, staring at the kifu. "We... played this game together. There can be no question of that. And your level of play. This game isn't recent." Fujiwara's eyes glistened then, and Waya tensed. _Please tell me he isn't going to cry._

"Waya-sensei, please. Do you know me from before my accident?" Fujiwara met Waya's gaze then, his expression vulnerable with longing. "It's okay, if you didn't tell me earlier for some reason. I won't ask why," he said quietly.

 _Can people fake cry?_ Waya wondered frantically, suddenly wishing he were anywhere else even though he still really really wanted to find out about **Sai**.

"I need to know," Fujiwara continued slowly. "I... didn't go into details when I told you and Isumi-san, but I'm suffering from complete retrograde amnesia. I don't remember anything from before my accident in May. Or anyone. Not my friends. Not my family. No one. Please, I need your help."

Waya's stomach churned. There was something in the other man's voice, a genuine, quiet desperation in his tone that struck Waya to the core. _He's... telling_ ** _the truth_** **.** _Oh god!_

"I..." Waya tried to speak, but the words got stuck in his mouth. Waya bit down hard on his lower lip, feeling like an utter shit. Fujiwara sounded so damned _desperate_ , not at all like Waya had been expecting. _Isumi-san was right, I shouldn't have meddled._ Waya let out a slow, shaky exhalation. "I'm sorry, but I've only met you recently in person. These are all Internet games, played on the NetGo server."

"NetGo? I don't know what that is," said Fujiwara, wiping at his eyes with his shirt sleeve.

Waya's jaw fell open. How could the man who had dominated the online go scene _not_ know about NetGo? _He really_ doesn't _know anything._ "NetGo is an online forum for people to challenge each other at go. It's just like a regular go game, except all you can see are the stones on the computer screen. You – the player – can reveal as much or as little about yourself as you like."

"You played me online. Did I tell you anything about myself? Anything at all?"

Fujiwara's face fell as Waya shook his head. "No, you never told anyone anything. You wouldn't chat after your games even if someone sent you a message. That's why I didn't ask you about playing online sooner, even though I recognized your style after the first time we played here. I thought—I didn't realize... I thought you were just keeping a secret about your Internet identity."

"Why would I do that?"

"I dunno, some people are shy and keep their online lives separate from real life. And you were famous – you _are_ famous. So maybe you didn't want too much attention?" Waya conjectured carefully. It was really weird to be trying to guess at the motives of a man he barely knew and had been suspicious of until just a minute ago, but Waya felt he owed it to Fujiwara to give him whatever help he could, as an unspoken apology.

Fujiwara stared at the **zelda** \- **s a i** kifu listlessly. "Famous? I don't even know who I am. I'm not a professional either. Why would my games be that important?"

"That doesn't matter on the Internet!" Waya blurted out, unable to keep from clenching his fists. Hearing that from **s a i** was just wrong, especially when so many players had dedicated themselves to learning every possible thing about the man and his games. Like Waya himself. Obviously Fujiwara _did_ have a problem if he didn't understand the value of his games. "Look," Waya said, trying to keep the frustration out of his tone, "All that really matters is your ability. During your time online, you played _a lot_ of people from all over the world, some of them really strong, some of them professionals too – and you _never lost._ NEVER. Do you know what that means?"

"No," said Fujiwara, shrinking back in his chair, looking completely lost.

Waya grabbed the last kifu and thrust it into Fujiwara's hands. "Don't you _remember_ this game? People are still talking about it two years later! _Touya Meijin_ retired after he lost to you! You have to remember," Waya added, almost pleadingly.

Fujiwara's eyes flickered over the kifu, and he made a small, choked noise of recognition. "This is _my_ game." He clutched the kifu to his chest like a child, closing his eyes as if in pain. "I've started writing down my games recently. They're the only thing I really remember from... before." This was said slowly, as if Fujiwara were confessing to a crime. "I have hundreds, but this one is precious to me. I think it's the most beautiful game I've ever played, because of _him_ , my opponent. I wanted to play him again – I _want_ to play him again." Fujiwara's fingers tightened around the kifu, wrinkling the paper. "I felt so terrible that I couldn't remember his name when he gave me such an exquisite game. But I won't forget it again," Fujiwara said, opening his eyes to meet Waya's firmly. " 'Touya Meijin.' " Fujiwara mouthed the name carefully, like a sacred phrase.

Waya felt a small thrill rush up his spine at Fujiwara's tone. He'd been wondering how **s a i** could possibly be so cold as to ignore the **touya kouyo** handle, which had become a familiar sight on the NetGo server after that epic clash. Even if **s a i** had become bored of NetGo, surely he'd come back for his rival. But it wasn't that **s a i** didn't _care_ anymore – he just simply didn't _remembe r_ **touya kouyo** , which was almost unbelievable. It did explain a lot, however. "Fujiwara-san, do you remember anything about Touya Kouyo-sensei?" Waya asked carefully.

Fujiwara shook his head, and Waya forced himself to take a few calming breaths before he continued. "Many people," Waya said, "consider Touya-sensei to be the best player alive. Over his career, he won more titles than any other player and defended them for years. He's had some heart problems these past few years, though, and that's probably part of the reason he decided to retire."

"But there's another reason." Waya leaned in over the table, lowering his voice. "He's looking for _you_."

"For _me_?" Fujiwara said, blinking in surprise. "Really?" he added, sounding hopeful.

"Yeah, definitely," Waya said, nodding vigorously. "I mean, it's not like he came out and announced it publicly, but since he's retired, he's always travelling to other countries and entering go tournaments. He says he's 'looking for new talent' but everyone knows he wants a rematch with you really badly."

Waya's voice trailed off at the look of dejection on the older man's face. The look of excitement had faded from Fujiwara's expression, and his shoulders were slumped.

Fujiwara smiled sadly at him. "I'm sorry. That's great news you've told me, and I really am happy, as someone who loves go. It would be wonderful to play them. But if these people are 'looking' for me, then they don't actually know who I am. Or if I have... a family. Or friends."

Waya clenched his fists, feeling disgustingly helpless. "I'm sorry, Fujiwara-san. I know more about **s a i** than most people – that was your net handle, er, your "Internet name" - but it's not much. You never talked to your opponents. Oh wait, I almost forgot! You did say one thing to me after our game. You said 'I'm pretty strong, aren't I?' I remember because I got mad."

"I said _that_?" Fujiwara blushed. "And I was called **s a i**? Like a rhino?"

"Yeah, I didn't believe you were an adult after that! I actually thought you were this friend of mine for awhile, 'cause he can be a real brat sometimes." Waya furrowed his brows in deep thought. "There _are_ actually a lot of similarities between your go, though. I even asked him if he knew you, but he said no. Sorry, I guess that's-"

Fujiwara wasn't listening. The other man had started to breathe in short, sharp gasps, and he drew trembling hands up to his face.

 _Oh god, he really is crying now._ Waya really, really wished that Isumi-san was there. "Umm, Fujiwara-san, are you okay?" Waya asked awkwardly, reaching a hand out, then dropping it.

Fujiwara sobbed something incomprehensible about rhinos.

Waya had no idea what he was supposed to do. Fujiwara obviously needed help, but Waya wasn't a doctor or a counselor, and he really didn't know anything important about **s a i**. So Waya just sat there, trying to stare at the table instead of Fujiwara. At least he'd chosen a table removed from the other customers and Fujiwara wasn't crying loudly enough to draw their attention.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	61. Chapter 61

**Chapter 61**

" **s a i**. Is not. A rhino." Fujiwara gasped out between sobs. "Sai is not a rhino," he repeated desperately.

"Hey, I believe you. Of course not," Waya agreed quickly, working up the courage to give Fujiwara a quick pat on the elbow.

Hearing that seemed to help, because Fujiwara's sobs became less violent then. Eventually his tears subsided, and he fumbled in his pockets for a tissue to dab at his streaked, damp face. "I'm sorry, Sensei," Fujiwara apologized, his voice thin. "Today has just been a little overwhelming for me." He took a deep breath. " 'Sai' is not just a net handle. It's my first name."

Waya's eyes widened. "Sai" _was_ indeed a name, although it wasn't particularly common, and people did often use all or part of their real names on NetGo. But Fujiwara was saying that... "You didn't remember your name?!" Waya blurted out before he could stop himself.

"I didn't remember my given name. But my full name is Fujiwara-no-Sai. I couldn't remember that until today. It seems... I learned a lot today. My name. _His_ name, this Touya Kouyo-san. And that he's looking for me, and he longs to play me again as well. And there are other people too." Fujiwara gave a weak smile to Waya. "Even if they don't know who I am, they know about me, and I must matter to them in some way. That makes me feel a little less lost."

"You matter to a lot of people!" Waya said quickly, eager for some way to console Fujiwara. "Yang Hai-san's crazy about your go. And Touya-sensei! He's kept playing online ever since your game, and his go has been changing too. You'd better look at his kifu before you play him again. He's gotten really strong, not that he wasn't already super strong before."

Waya raked his hand through his hair, jittery with excitement at the thought of a re-match between **s a i** and **touya kouyo**. "Oh yeah, other pros – a bunch of older ones - have followed Touya-sensei's lead and started playing online too, so players everywhere are getting stronger. Even _my_ sensei logs on sometimes now. He was really jealous when he saw that game between you and Touya-sensei!" Waya was unable to resist the urge to grin at the recollection, despite the seriousness of the situation. "Although Ogata-sensei was pretty pissed too, he'd been wanting to play you for a long time, and you played his sensei instead. It's actually kinda funny."

Fujiwara's posture stiffened abruptly then. "Ogata-sensei knows **s a i**?" he said quietly.

Waya wondered at Fujiwara's sudden tenseness; why did he care about Ogata? Maybe Fujiwara had heard someone else in the salon mention him or something. Still, it _was_ definitely a question that Waya could answer for Fujiwara. "Yeah, he's almost as obsessed as Yang Hai-san. He's Touya-sensei's top student – he's won titles - so I guess it makes sense that he would want a chance to play the guy who beat his teacher. It's a way to prove his skill as a player."

"Ah, I suppose that makes sense," Fujiwara said, his gaze turning inwards.

"Hey, are you okay?" Fujiwara looked pale, and his eyes were still red-rimmed. "I guess this is kind of crazy for you, learning all this." Waya hoped Fujiwara would be able to handle dealing with everything; Isumi had been right about him being sensitive.

Fujiwara nodded slowly, looking emotionally drained. "I just have a lot to think about now. I'm a little tired, too. But thank you for telling me the truth. I'm going to have to decide what to do from now," he said, pushing his chair back.

Waya stood up as well. "Look, I'm really sorry about not telling you sooner. It was wrong of me not to, I should have believed you."

"It's alright. I suppose my situation is a little difficult to accept, especially when we don't know each other that well," said Fujiwara with a weak smile.

Waya felt a sharp pang of guilt. "Still. Look, if there's anything I can do to help, or if you have more questions, just call me or send me a message. Okay?" Waya said, his voice sincere.

"I'll remember that. Thank you for your kind offer." Fujiwara bowed. "Take care."

Waya watched as Fujiwara left the salon. He felt pretty crappy himself. Isumi was going to kill him when he confessed, but there was no point in trying to hide the deed. However, Waya supposed in the long run it had actually been the right thing to do, although his motivations had been less than pure. But he _had_ helped Fujiwara regain some of his memories. Poor guy, Waya thought. He couldn't imagine not even remembering his own first name.

He rubbed at the back of his tense neck, wondering if there was anything he'd forgotten to tell Fujiwara about himself. Waya couldn't shake the niggling feeling that he _had_ forgotten something important, but perhaps it was just paranoia. Being responsible in some way for **s a i**... that was scary.

With a sigh, Waya decided he might as well text Isumi. Isumi would know what to do.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization_


	62. Chapter 62

**Chapter 62**

"I'm back," Ogata called out, slipping his shoes off in the apartment's entranceway. But there was no answer, and Ogata frowned. Was Fujiwara still out? It was already dark. Ogata had discouraged Fujiwara from returning home late, warning him that it wasn't safe in Shinjuku. Fujiwara usually obliged him, but Fujiwara was also prone to losing track of time if he got distracted (the usual culprit was a game of go, of course.)

When Ogata entered the kitchen, he was pleased to see that the light in the living room was on. There was the faint _pachi pachi_ of stones clacking on the goban.

Fujiwara had both goke and a printed kifu beside him on the floor, but he did not glance at the kifu as he smoothly laid out the stones.

Quietly, Ogata padded into the room to get a better look at the partially completed game. He stroked his chin in consideration; there was something very familiar about the flow of the patterns even though only a few hands had been recreated.

"I learned something interesting today."

Ogata started slightly; he hadn't thought Fujiwara had noticed him entering. Fujiwara could be remarkably absorbed when it came to go.

"But it might not be so interesting to _you_ ," Fujiwara said as he continued laying out the stones.

"Why would you say that?" Ogata said, breaking his attention away from the goban at the odd tone in Fujiwara's statement. He sounded almost... cold. Fujiwara never sounded cold. And it was decidedly strange that Fujiwara hadn't bothered to look up from the goban yet, especially since he was just recreating a game and not playing an actual opponent.

"Because Ogata-sensei already knows, and he hates it when people tell him things he already knows." Fujiwara's level voice wavered for a moment, and Ogata looked sharply at his bent face. Fujiwara's drawn expression and his reddened eyes didn't match that cool tone.

Ogata felt his stomach twist. He'd seen Fujiwara upset before; the other man _was_ sensitive, but Ogata had never personally made him cry. Ogata mentally reviewed the past few days, but dredged up nothing out the ordinary. He _had_ teased Fujiwara about wearing lip gloss on Sunday, but Fujiwara had beamed and coyly offered to buy Ogata his own favorite flavor. "I apologize if I hurt your feelings somehow, but I assure you, it certainly wasn't intentional."

Fujiwara did not respond for a long moment, and the only sound in the room was the clacking of go stones. Ogata looked down at the board again, wondering why Fujiwara persisted in replaying a game when he was obviously wasn't enjoying it; what was so special abo—

Abruptly, Ogata froze, harsh recognition dawning on him like an unforgiving sun. **That** game.

"I want to believe that, but I can't," Fujiwara said softly, still not meeting his eyes. "When we first met, you said you'd never heard of me. But yet you recognize this game."

 **s a i** vs. **touya kouyo**. The black and white stones stared up at him accusingly like silent witnesses. _You knew, you knew!_

" **s a i** was my handle on the NetGo server when I played this game. But **s a i** has a more personal meaning to me. My name is Fujiwara-no-Sai. 'Sai' is my given name."

Ogata was unable to pull his eyes off the game, his head suddenly feeling oddly heavy. He'd known without a doubt that Fujiwara was **s a i** since their first game, but somehow he'd let himself completely downplay the significance of Fujiwara's net identity, and what that knowledge might mean to Fujiwara's recovery. He had been wrong. Horribly wrong.

"Did... you really not know I was **s a i**?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Ogata could see Fujiwara looking up at him, his wide eyes vulnerable and hopeful. As if he were perfectly willing to believe that this was all a big misunderstanding or a mistake, if Ogata would just say so.

Ogata _wanted_ to. He wanted to lie so much that he was nearly overcome by the intensity of that desire.

But he couldn't lie to Fujiwara, not when Fujiwara was looking at him like that. "I knew." The words tasted bitter in his mouth.

Fujiwara visibly crumpled, his shoulders sagging. "Did you have a reason for not telling me?"

Not a good one. Mostly, he hadn't wanted to share Fujiwara with Sensei, a reason which had seemed perfectly valid at the time, but now just seemed damned petty, especially now that he knew Fujiwara as more than an amnesiac stranger with an amazing ability. "It was never my intention to hurt you."

Fujiwara's face fell. "I don't understand. You've been very kind to me, taking me into your home and trying to help me regain my memory. I know it was our agreement that I could live here in exchange for the teaching, but you've been _my_ teacher too: you taught me about all the important things I've forgotten, like the trains and fire alarms and cell phones and not answering the door for that NHK man. You've been my friend. So I don't understand why..."

 _I don't understand why you would be so selfish._ Ogata knew what Fujiwara had left unspoken out of kindness or politeness. "I didn't think it was... relevant. You were completely anonymous online. I didn't think you would learn any useful information."

"How could you just decide that by yourself, without discussing it with me?" Fujiwara's fingers tightened around his fan. "When you know _nothing_ , _everything_ is relevant," he said, his voice low. "Today, I learned my name. I learned the name of _your_ teacher: this game I played with him is the best game I've ever played. I learned that other people know of me, they've played me, and some of them want to play me again. I actually existed before my accident; I'm connected in some way." Fujiwara made a little pained noise then and turned towards the balcony, facing away from Ogata, but not before Ogata saw his lower lip trembling. "Why was Waya-sensei the one to tell me all this instead of you?"

Waya... that red-headed student of Morishita's. Of course. Against all odds, Fujiwara had bumped into **zelda** , a fan who would recognize his style immediately. Ogata's fingers itched for a cigarette, something to distract himself from the fact that Fujiwara was crying because he'd been betrayed by the first person he'd met in his new life, a person he'd obviously trusted far more than he ought.

Ogata had no answer for Fujiwara. He had no justification. Just a tight, aching sensation in his chest.

"I've imposed too much on your generosity," Fujiwara said towards the direction of the balcony, wiping at his face as he took a few deep breaths. "You've done so much for me, and I could only play go with you in return. But you don't need me; you have an excellent teacher and you're already very skilled. I'm certain you will go far in your career."

Fujiwara was leaving. Of course he was. He couldn't even stand to look at Ogata anymore. It was ending, and it was Ogata's fault again. "What will you do?" Ogata asked numbly.

"Iwamoto-san offered me a job at his salon recently. I would watch the counter and answer the phone, and play games with the customers when I'm not busy. He says I might as well, since I'm there so much anyway and I get along with the regulars. And... there's someone I can live with for awhile, until I get my own apartment."

It would be difficult for Fujiwara to start out in Tokyo, especially considering the high cost of living and Fujiwara's damaged memory, but Fujiwara wasn't the type to back down out of fear. That very first time they'd met, Fujiwara had been sopping wet and utterly confused, but still indignant enough to try walking off by himself into the night when Ogata had injured his pride. He wouldn't be able to reason Fujiwara out of his decision, and he could provide little incentive for Fujiwara to want to stay with someone who had hurt him badly.

Ogata was a go player, and a professional player knew when to resign. Only an inexperienced player kept bumbling around when his moves had long lost their effectiveness.

But this was a game Ogata _couldn't_ lose. He couldn't just let Fujiwara leave.

"I'm sorry that this is so sudden," Fujiwara said. His expressive hands were still and folded on top of his knees. "But I've realized that it was unfair for me to simply continue taking advantage of your hospitality until I recover, when I have no idea of when that may be. And I... have to learn to do things for myself instead of being an inconvenience to you, and taking time away from your busy schedule."

An inconvenience? Ogata thought of Fujiwara's awed expression the first time Ogata had taken him the station, or his smirk of childish mischief when he'd successfully managed to spam Ogata's cell phone shortly after learning text messaging. Or the way he just simply knew how to _listen_ when Ogata gave an explanation, his eyes completely intent and head tilted to a slight angle as he absorbed every word. No, it hadn't been about go. But teaching Fujiwara – just _being_ with him - hadn't been an inconvenience at all. Ogata didn't regret a single minute.

"Stay."

Fujiwara's shoulders straightened as if he were steeling himself. "Please, don't ask that. This is better – for both of us."

Ogata was a Go player. He knew how to make sacrifices.

"Stay. You don't have to play Go with me anymore."

"I'm sorry, did you just say...?" Fujiwara was staring at him from over his shoulder now, his expression one of shock.

"You don't have to play Go, or teach Go, or even discuss it with me if you don't wish to," Ogata said quietly.

"Why would you want me to stay if I won't play you?"

Fujiwara's tone of utter disbelief felt like a knife twisting in Ogata's gut, especially since Ogata was the one responsible for Fujiwara having the impression that he was only valued for his Go. And at first, that _had_ been true. The arrangement had been made out of pragmatism; Ogata had wanted to play **s a i** , and Fujiwara had needed a place to stay.

But somewhere along the line, it had stopped being a merely useful arrangement. Ogata wished he'd realized that sooner. His throat tightened when he tried to answer Fujiwara's question. "I'm... concerned about you. There's still a lot I haven't taught you. And I... I'm afraid that the fish have become rather attached to you. They'll probably sulk and won't eat if you're gone."

"That would be unfortunate," Fujiwara said, smiling sadly as if he knew what Ogata was really trying to say. "It's very kind of you to make such an offer, but I don't know..." He bit at his lip and lowered his eyes.

"You don't have to decide now. But regardless of what you choose, there is something you must know. It's about you from before your accident."

Fujiwara jerked his head up to stare at Ogata.

Ogata took a deep breath. It was time to come completely clean. "It's all I know about **s a i** , other than what Waya-kun already told you. I should warn you, it's only something I _suspect_ strongly because the young man in question won't discuss it with me or anyone."

Fujiwara frowned, looking confused, but he nodded to encourage Ogata to continue.

"A few years ago, a brilliant player appeared out of nowhere - a complete unknown with apparently no sensei or formal training. He even won an important match against me not long ago. I'm certain he's the one who arranged the game between you and Touya-sensei, which implies that he was in contact with you. But more than that, when I look at his play, I see your shadow in his moves. There's a pattern to the joseki he uses, the way he reads the board, and how he calculates risk: it reminds me of you. _If_ my instincts are correct, he was your student. And if he was your student, he might know you personally."

"Really?" Fujiwara whispered.

"It's possible, however, that it was just an anonymous online mentoring. I have no way of knowing," Ogata cautioned. "But if you wish, I will put you in contact with him."

"Yes, please," Fujiwara said, his voice wavering. "I don't recall any students, but obviously I was experienced with shidougo before I met you. I hope he'll talk to me... what is his name?"

"Shindou. Shindou Hikaru."

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	63. Chapter 63

**Chapter 63**

"What the hell is the matter with you?"

"Huh?"

Waya was glaring at him, taking a bite out of his hamburger as though it had personally offended him, and swallowed it down with a large gulp of Coke. Waya was planning to talk to Hikaru about Sai today, hoping Hikaru'd have any information that could help Sai recover his memory, but Hikaru looked as though he were in a different dimension.

"I've noticed how you're acting, you know. You're completely distracted. Something wrong?"

"I'm doing well enough, aren't I?" He was, wasn't he? He hadn't really been paying attention, but he seemed to be back on a winning streak lately.

"You are. That's why I haven't asked you about it before. It's not like that time you skipped all your matches." Waya watched him with a frown, eating slowly. "But you're completely out of it. Seriously, what's wrong?"

Hikaru glanced down at his hands, then picked up his own Coke to give himself something to do. Sloshing the liquid around inside the cup, he stared down into it, his mind oddly blank.

"I have feelings for Akira," he heard himself say.

"Feelings? What kind of feelings?"

"Well, like...maybe...perhaps...love?" He looked up to find Waya staring at him, mouth hanging open, half-eaten hamburger dangling from his lower lip. "Waya, that's really disgusting."

Waya swallowed, stared, and then burst into laughter. He laughed so loudly and so long that every person in the restaurant turned to stare at them, and Hikaru sighed, waiting for him to finish.

"What's so funny?" It was Isumi, arriving late, sitting down and looking at the two of them. "Or wait, don't tell me before I get my lunch." He got up again and headed for the counter while Waya wiped his eyes, his shoulders still shaking. Hikaru sighed and continued eating, suspecting that the full force of what he'd just said would hit him later.

Isumi returned to the table and sat down, carrying a tray with his lunch.

"Well, what's the joke?" he asked, glancing between them.

"I told Waya I have feelings for Akira." Hikaru said, quietly, and Waya started laughing again, sobbing with mirth. Isumi didn't laugh. He glanced over at Hikaru, his expression thoughtful, and nodded.

"I see," he said, lifting his hamburger to his lips and beginning to eat.

"Isumi-san, he's not serious. - Congratulations, buddy, you've made the joke of the week. No, wait, let's call it the joke of the century!" Waya cackled, looking exhausted with laughter, his face red.

"No" Hikaru replied, sipping his drink and regretting he'd ever answered Waya's question. "I am not joking. I am being very serious."

Waya abruptly stopped laughing, and his expression changed into one of horror. Glancing between Isumi and Hikaru, he drew a couple of deep shaky breaths, his body still in laughing mode.

"Wh- Serious? You're actually serious?"

"Waya." It was Isumi, his voice and expression tired. "What could be not serious about that?"

"Yeah, but- Touya's... Shindou, you like guys? I thought you're dating Nase!"

Hikaru shrugged, picking at the lettuce leaf sticking limply out of what remained of his hamburger.  
"I'm not dating Nase, moron! How many times do I have to repeat this?"

"I wouldn't have thought that of you," Waya said, sitting up, his back very straight. "I mean, you're not... You don't look like... I mean, you're not like that."

"Waya, shut up!"

"You can normally tell, though, can't you?" Waya said, glaring defensively at Isumi. "I mean, it's kinda obvious, sometimes. You know. Those sort of men, they're..."

"Now, I don't' know if I like men in general, you know. I mean…I only have these kinds of feelings for Akira, that's all. Besides, as Nase or Akari kissed me before –

"Nase KISSED you?!"

" - back then I thought , oh, that's not bad – but that was all. But when I kissed Akira - "

"You KISSED him?"

"Or that time when I spent the night in a hotel with Nase -"

"You SPENT the night in a hotel with Nase?!"

"I had thought at first, _okay, why not give it a try, Nase's pretty and smart and she likes me and all_. But while she was taking a bath, I just fell asleep. I guess I still ow Nase an explanation. I didn't feel the drive, if you know what I mean... But everytime I spend the night with Akira - "

"You SPEND nights with Touya Akira?! Of all people, that ugly arrogant..." Waya looked like he's about to puke.

"Waya, I think that's enough nonsense talking already." Isumi interrupted and turned to Hikaru. "I am actually not surprised, Shindou. I mean, I saw you two together often enough at the Institute, how you talk and look at each other – I've always felt like it was much more than just rivalry between you two. There's always been a strange kind of understanding between you two. In fact, Touya Akira never ever shows any kind of emotions, unless Shindou Hikaru's somehow involved.." Isumi smiled, added "If you love him and he loves you back, then I'm glad for you two."

"Oh…Isumi-san…thank you!"

"Okay then, guess I'll have to accept that anyway." Waya sat back again, frowning. "What else could I say huh? Hey, imagine Weekly Go running the tittle **_Two princes of Go in a battle of…tounges -_** That would be hilarious! "

"Of course Weekly Go is not going to run such a title. I could trust in your discretion, couldn't I?"

"My discretion is but not for free, mind you. I want more ramen!" Waya laughed.


	64. Chapter 64

**Chapter 64**

Hikaru couldn't wait for the day to end to get on the train to Touya residence – who knew when the former Meijin would be back and they'd have a place all for themselves like this? After some matches, the two decided to study some kifu of the recent High- Dan matches before they go to bed. Hikaru flopped down on the futon, but support his back with several pillows, until he was semi-reclining. Akira lay back against him, resting on Hikaru's chest, holding up the kifu so they could both study it. Hikaru rounded his arms around Akira's waist into an embrace. Akira seemed to be very concentrated on studying, while Hikaru couldn't help sniffling and putting kisses on Akira's silky hair, on Akira's temple, his arms squeezed Akira tightly. Hikaru recalled the lunchtalk with Waya and Isumi earlier that day. _Being gay or not, I don't care, I'm doing this with Akira_. When the affection became too much, he whispered into Akira's ears:

"Akira, I think I -"

Hikaru couldn't finish his sentence while Akira's laptop chimed, and an instant messenger window flashed open. Akira escaped from the embrace and headed to the the desk.

 **gofish** : Hey Akira-kun, I want you to look at a kifu. It's a game i played recently with a friend. Thought you might find it interesting.

 **goforever** : Hi Ogata-san. Is it very urgent? I am a little bit busy at the moment.

 **gofish** : Trust me, you'll find this interesting.

 **goforever** : I have it now. Any handicaps?

 **gofish** : no. just 6.5 komi.

Akira wondered who Ogata's opponent had been. He did not know many people who could play Ogata without a handicap, and of those, Akira did not think Ogata would refer to any of them as "a friend." Probably someone from NetGo, then.

Akira skimmed quickly over the opening moves. Ogata had definitely been playing Black; Akira had played him more often than anyone other than his father, so Ogata's openings were as familiar to Akira as Ogata's precise handwriting. A grin tugged at the corners of Akira's mouth when he noticed Ogata's keima at 11-6 and 12-4. Ogata had played a very similar move against Akira before, and he'd used it to set up a trap. White hadn't fallen for the trap, though. Instead, White had responded two hands later with a countermove that effectively neutralized Ogata's trap. Akira's pulse quickened as his eyes flickered to the mid-game exchange. White wasn't merely holding his own with Ogata-san, he was forcing Ogata to respond to _his_ moves. Ogata's advantage in playing first had quickly evaporated under White's brilliant, aggressive assault.

Akira frowned; there was something odd about White's fascinating moves. His underlying style indicated a classical approach to the goban. It was as if White had studied primarily kifu from an era when a strong emphasis on early domination required that the player with White also play aggressively from the opening moves. With modern komi, however, logic dictated that White ought merely play conservatively to protect his or her lead, especially against a powerful opponent like Ogata-san.

White hadn't. In fact, Akira saw several daring exchanges on the kifu which made him suspect that White was deliberately challenging Black, forcing Ogata to place brilliant, decisive hands in response. Yet Ogata's hands weren't enough to hold off White: White knew how to use modern joseki as well, and he'd fused it seamlessly with his classical style. The result was play that was simultaneously beautiful and utterly devastating. And very familiar.

As Akira was still lost in his thoughts, Hikaru had slid behind him, hugged him from the back, his lips lightly brushed against Akira's nape and asked. "What took you so long, Akira?"

A sudden recollection flashed across Akira's mind like an epiphany at the goban, a remark one of his father's students had made at a study group: _And what if Shuusaku knew modern joseki?_

Hikaru.

Shuusaku.

 **s a i**.

Akira felt his hands trembling as he turned the laptop to let Hikaru look at the game record. After some minutes of silence, Akira turned to Hikaru to see an equal trembling face. Hikaru was so much in a shock he couldn't even move a finger, he stood as though he were shock-frozen.

 _It could not be..._

 **goforever:** You were playing **s a i**.

 **gofish:** yes, and he beat me by five and a half moku. he was playing nasty.

Akira swallowed, his mind a jittery rush of questions.

 **goforever:** But...but this is simply impossible...Where did you find him?

 **gofish:** in ichigaya.

 **goforever:** I'm sorry, I don't understand.

 **gofish:** **s a i** is a man named fujiwara no sai. i found him floating in the ichigaya canal.

 **goforever:** In the canal? Ogata-san, please don't make jokes like that. This is not possible.

 _Hikaru said Sai was a ghost!_

 **gofish:** i'm quite serious, Akira- _kun_. fujiwara suffers from severe retrograde amnesia. he doesn't remember anything from before the accident.

 **goforever** : The accident? He's hurt?! What happened? Is he okay? Is he in the hospital?

 **gofish:** calm down. the accident – and we don't really know what happened, the doctors can't figure it out – was some time ago. his condition is stable, and he's not in the hospital. fujiwara's perfectly healthy, other than his memory.

Akira exhaled slowly, trying to regain some of his composure. Given the state Hikaru was in, he had to be calm, even though the whole story simply didn't make sense to him at all. Akira knew, though, that Ogata would not lie about something that serious. Not to him. Also, White's play in the kifu bore the mark of **s a i** as surely as any masterpiece bore its maker's name. It was not something that could be forged.

 **gofish:** you still there?

 **goforever:** Yes, I'm sorry. It's just a lot to think about. May I ask more about S—Fujiwara-san's condition?

 **gofish:** i suppose it couldn't hurt. what do you want to know?

 **goforever:** You said you found him in the canal. Did he almost drown?

 **gofish:** it doesn't seem that way. he would have had fluid in his lungs or other physical damage. he was dazed, though. maybe he hit his head and that caused the amnesia, but nothing showed up in the scans.

 **goforever:** I see. I'm glad he isn't suffering from additional injuries. What exactly does "severe retrograde amnesia" mean?

 **gofish:** it means that his memories from before the accident are mostly gone. some things he's completely forgotten, so he has to be re-educated about them, like how to use a cell phone or a ticket machine. other things, he remembers, but he needs a trigger first.

 **gofish:** for example, he didn't remember that he knew how to play go until he saw a goban and just automatically started putting down stones. i had even asked him if he played go before that, and he said no.

 **goforever:** But he played beautifully in this game. How can he play so well if he's suffering from mental injuries?

 **gofish:** he doesn't have any difficulty forming new memories or learning new things. he's not mentally impaired, per se... other than not remembering very much. he doesn't even know how old he is or what he does.

Akira blinked at the laptop screen. **s a i** -Fujiwara-san - didn't remember his own _family_? Like... he didn't remeber _Hikaru?_

 **goforever:** But where has he been living, then?

 **gofish:** he's been living with me. it was a convenient arrangement.

Akira's eyebrows shot up. Ogata had lived alone as long as Akira could remember, and Ogata had always seemed rather determined to continue in that manner. Akira squirmed, recalling the particular dinner that his mother had cheerfully offered to introduce Ogata to "a very nice young lady." Ogata had almost choked on his soup.

So if Ogata was allowing this Fujiwara to live with him, Ogata obviously believed that he was indeed **s a i**. Yet Ogata had kept silent about Fujiwara. It didn't sound as if the accident had happened last week, either; the way Ogata referred to Fujiwara suggested long familiarity.

 **goforever:** How long has he been living with you? You said he's been like this for a long time.

There was a pause.

 **gofish:** it's been a while.

That stung more than Akira liked to admit. Akira closed his eyes, thinking of his father stubbornly sitting in front of that goban with the bowl of white stones always on the opposite side, and wondered how Ogata could be so cold. If Ogata hadn't told Akira about **s a i** , then he definitely hadn't told his sensei.

 **goforever:** Ogata-san. Why are you telling me this now? You want something.

 **gofish:** suspicious, aren't we? but i'll get to the point: it's for fujiwara. the two of us have always suspected that there is a connection between shindou and **s a i**. given how little Shindou like me these days, i doubt it's a good idea if i talk to him about this.

 **goforever:** You want me to ask Shindou about **s a i**.

 **gofish:** if shindou was fujiwara's student, then he probably knows some personal details about him. shindou trusts you. he'll talk to you.

Akira bit at his lower lip, hesitating as he cast a wary glance Hikaru. Hikaru was still standing in his shock-frozen state as before.

 **goforever:** I'll ask Shindou, for Fujiwara-san's sake. But why you didn't say anything sooner?

 **gofish:** ...later. we can discuss this in person. i'm sending you a picture of fujiwara to show to shindou. see if he recognizes it. text my phone afterwards, please. good night.

 **goforever** : I'll do it. But...Ogata-san...

 **gofish:** Yes?

 **goforever:** how do you know...Shindou's here?

 **gofish** : Oh, come on, Akira-kun. Who do you think you can fool with those hickies all over your neck and collarbone? Seriously, a little discretion wouldn't hurt.

###

Akira downloaded the image to his desktop and then clicked it open. He stared in disbelief. There was _no way_ that could be the right picture. The beaming man in the picture looked like a college student, not a battle-hardened go veteran who could defeat his father.

Akira sighed in exasperation and turned his attention back to the picture. Fujiwara had unusually long black hair that fell past his hips. He was standing in front of a fish tank, his fingers splayed out in a "V" sign as he posed for the camera. Hikaru never described Sai's appearance in his story, but Akira developed an image of an much older man with age-wizened hands, and piercing eyes like his father's. Akira tried to imagine Fujiwara sitting across from his father at the goban. His smiling face just didn't match the fierce, brilliant play in the kifu Ogata had sent him. Akira knew better than to judge a player by his or her appearance, especially since Akira himself had often been underestimated for that very same reason.

Akira turned back to Hikaru, intending to express his disbelief in the whole story, when he heard Hikaru mumbling.

"That's **Sai**."

Hikaru was still trembling, Akira noted numbly as the other boy continued ranting. He had never seen Hikaru in such a state. He reached out a tentative hand for Hikaru's shoulders, hugged him and guided him back down on the futon. He ran his hands on Hikaru's back, trying to calm Hikaru down. They stayed quiet for a long moment, before Hikaru began to talk.

"I don't understand what Ogata's up to, but Sai has always been dead. Akira, Sai was a ghost. This whole story just doesn't make sense at all...but that person in the picture. That's Sai! I've been with him more than two years, I know his face and his smile."

Akira stared at the empty room, also trying to make sense of the night's events. His heart broke into bits seeing the face of his beloved one soaked in sorrow.

"Hikaru, I don't understand what's going on either. But I'm here for you, whatever happens. You are not alone. You are never alone! Let's see Ogata and this Fujiwara as soon as tomorrow to clear this up, okay?" Akira said while leading Hikaru back down on the futon. He didn't want to make Hikaru more upset, but the matter had to be resolved.

Hikaru nodded. He was exhausted from the events of the evening. He wrapped his arms around Akira and buried his face in Akira's chest. A few minutes later, his breathing evened out and his frame relaxed.

Akira let out a long breath. He didn't know what was going to happen tomorrow, but somehow things were going to work out _, things must have to work out._


	65. Chapter 65

**Chapter 65**

"So, Shindou doesn't want to come to my apartment? Afraid I'll push him into my oven?" Ogata said wryly to his cell phone.

"Please don't joke right now." Akira winced, hoping he wasn't going to need to take an aspirin for the massive headache he could feel building. Usually Akira didn't mind a bit of teasing from Ogata, but Hikaru had stayed mostly silent the entire morning, instead tapping his fan against his hand and staring at the television dully.

"Well then," Ogata said, "We could meet for lunch somewhere."

"That sounds like a good idea. Where would you suggest?"

"How about that Italian place in Ebisu that you like - Amapola?"

"Wait a moment, please." Akira covered the receiver. "Hikaru, do you like Italian?"

Hikaru shrugged in a manner that Akira interpreted as _do-I-really-look-like-I-care?_

"That would be fine," Akira said into the phone. "I look forward to meeting Fujiwara-san, then."

"Fujiwara looks forward to meeting you both as well."

###

"He wouldn't forget me. Even if he could have come back, he wouldn't have forgotten me. He would have come back for me. He would _never_ forget me," Hikaru said, his voice tight and low.

 _Does Fujiwara-san remember Hikaru's name?_

 _No, he doesn't,_ Ogata had answered after a pause. Then: _I also showed him a picture of Shindou from Go Weekly, but he didn't recognize it. That doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't know Shindou; sometimes it takes awhile for his memories to register._

"I looked everywhere for him when he disappeared. If it had been me who had disappeared, he would have looked for me and he would have never stopped until he found me. He was just that type, you know. Really determined. Kinda obsessive, actually," Hikaru said, his eyes distant. "This couldn't be him, after all."

"What if it really is him?" Akira's voice was low and desperate."Wouldn't that be a good thing, then? You've searched for him everywhere, now he's coming back to you..."

Hikaru was gripping his seat arm rest so hard his knuckles were white. He kept staring straight ahead, as if he were holding a conversation with the seat in front of him instead of Akira. "Ogata said Sai doesn't remember _anything_. So he's gonna want to know about himself. Like where he lives and about his family and his job and how we met, and he's going to ask a million questions like he always did - and _what exactly am I supposed to tell him_? " Hikaru's voice cracked on the question.

Hikaru was _scared_ , Akira realized with a jolt.

"Akira, I can't tell him he was my _ghost_ because he committed **suicide** over a thousand years ago!" Hikaru shivered visibly.

"Hikaru. Look at me!" Akira interrupted, his voice commanding. Then he waited. He waited until Hikaru dragged his face away from the seat to hesitantly meet Akira's gaze. Hikaru looked like a scared little boy, his eyes large with fear and pleading, nothing like the fierce opponent Akira was used to facing across the goban. "I know this's not gonna be easy, but think about the positive side! If that is really Sai, it means you've got him back in your life. We can work to revive his memory. I'll be by your side...Sai's your friend, so he's mine too!"

"I don't think he ever forgot that you were the first one he got to play a real game with, after being stuck in Grandpa's goban," Hikaru said, rubbing his thumb against his fan with an air of consideration. "And he was always using you to spur me on, stuff like 'I bet Akira's practicing now!' when I wanted to play video games instead of go. Or 'You must face your fears like Akira, who is a brave young dragon on the goban!' when I was having a tough time during the pro exams."

"Did he really say something like that?" Akira said, blushing lightly. It was surprising, but still kind of nice to know that Hikaru's _ghost_ had liked him.

"Sai always said lots of weird things," he said, apparently misunderstanding the cause of Akira's surprise. "It wasn't his fault, I guess, since he was born in the Heian, and they had lots of crazy ideas. You wouldn't believe how long it took me to convince him that people _have_ actually been to the moon. He thought I was just teasing him." Hikaru smiled sadly. "For a dead guy, he was usually pretty happy. Until near the end, when he got scared he would disappear, and angry because I hardly ever let him play. That's why...if it is Sai..."

Akira nodded to encourage Hikaru to keep talking.

"He seems happy in that picture. But if I tell him the truth, then he'll remember it was my fault he disappeared, and then he'll hate me for not letting him play." Hikaru lowered his eyes to the fan in his hand.

"I don't think Sai could ever hate you, especially since you did the best you could. It was a difficult situation," Akira said, smoothing Hikaru's cheeks assuringly. "Two talented, strong-willed players sharing one body was an arrangement that simply could not work for long, no matter how strong the friendship. And didn't he give you his fan in your dream? He wanted you to carry on his legacy. His Go."

"But I just wanted _him_ back," Hikaru whispered, a shadow darkening his features. "If he's really back, I don't wanna... you know, make him sad. I don't want him to remember what I did."

Akira quietly took time to process that. Sai had been Hikaru's friend on a level that Akira knew he might never fully comprehend, or compete with. Sai had lived in Hikaru's very consciousness; for over two years, the two had done _everything_ as one. No wonder Hikaru was so desperate at the thought that Sai could be back, and terrified about how Sai would react to him, especially upon learning about his own past. It was too much of a burden for one person to bear.

But Sai had Hikaru. And Hikaru had _him._

"You have to tell him the truth. Concealing the truth is not an option," Akira said finally. Akira had been learning from Ogata for years, and he knew how to learn from Ogata's mistakes just as well as his successes. He was not going to be party to keeping secrets from Fujiwara.

Hikaru's breath hitched, and Akira quickly continued. "But you don't have to tell him all at once. It's like..." Akira paused, fumbling for an analogy. "Shidougo. You can't tell a beginner all the mistakes he made in his very first game, or he'll be completely overwhelmed and he'll be afraid to even put a stone down the next time. You have to work it out with him a little at a time, letting him see the patterns emerging for himself. That's better than you just telling him because he'll see the truth on his own. Let me put it this way: I don't think you ought to tell Sai that he was your ghost at our first meeting."

"Yeah, I guess not," Hikaru said shakily. "But then how I do explain things? That's kinda important to the whole 'Where did I come from?' bit."

"You can't lie to him. You don't want to do anything to undermine his trust. You're going to have to hope that he accepts that you can't tell him everything right away, because of the... particulars of his past."

Hikaru swallowed, looking half-panicked again. "But I'm not good at that sort of thing! I always blurt out what I'm thinking and get in trouble for it."

With a wince, Akira recalled a few of Hikaru's more memorable slip-ups. "Well, we still have about two hours before the appointment. Let's discuss what you should say. Just in case."

Hikaru looked like he had cheered up a bit. Suddenly, he reached out to cup Akira's face in his palms, put a kiss on his lips, their lips locking for a brief second. "Akira, what am I to do without you?" Something golden and warm seemed to spread all over Akira's chest, and he looked deep into Hikaru's jade green eyes and grinned, for the first time since yesterday.

###

 ** _Credits to_** ** _:_** _Ontogenesis (Desynchronization) and Stirring-still ( Preliminaries)_


	66. Chapter 66

**Chapter 66**

The two hours slipped by too quickly. The ride to Ebisu fortunately only took twenty minutes. They spent the journey in silence, both of them preoccupied with thoughts of the upcoming event.

Even though Akira hadn't eaten at the restaurant in several months, he possessed good recall, and the sun still hadn't set, so it wasn't difficult for him to retrace his way down the streets. "There it is," he said to Hikaru when he spotted the conspicuous potted palms that adorned the restaurant's outdoor patio.

But Hikaru had frozen on the steps, his gaze riveted to a point over Akira's shoulder.

"Sai," Hikaru whispered helplessly.

Akira followed Hikaru's line of sight to where two men were seated around one of the patio tables. The one facing Akira was holding a cigarette and reading a menu – Ogata-san. The waiter walked away from the table, and Ogata looked up from the menu. He spotted them and gave a little half-wave, and his companion turned around.

Sai – _Fujiwara-san_ – Akira corrected mentally, pushed his chair back and stood up quickly. He took a step forward and stopped, his gaze flickering uncertainly between Akira and Hikaru. "Shindou-sensei, Touya-sensei," Fujiwara said, his hands plastered against his legs, as if he was torn between trying to decide whether to bow in introduction. _He_ **doesn't** _recognize Hikaru_ , Akira realized with a sinking certainty.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Hikaru said in a small voice, and out of the corner of his eye Akira could see that he was clutching his fan against his hip. "Don't you remember me? Dont' you remember me at all?"

"I'm very sorry," Fujiwara said, his expressive eyes full of guilt, and he did bow now, in apology. "I did not mean to cause you distress by forgetting you. I was hoping you could help me, but perhaps it was selfish of me to ask for you to come-"

"Don't apologize to me like I'm some stranger you bumped into! We were friends, we were together all the time, and you made me play Go, and you wanted to play Akira's dad and you... you..."

Shindou shuddered and took a deep gulp of air, his chest heaving as if he'd just run a grueling marathon, and Fujiwara lifted a hand as if he wanted to touch Hikaru, but he did not step forward.

"The Hand of God. You wanted to find it so badly. That's why I kept playing, to find it for you." Hikaru's head was bowed now. Akira realized that Hikaru was crying from the choked tone of his voice, but Akira couldn't bring himself to pull Hikaru into his arms, now that there were other people to witness.

"Don't you remember? _Sai_?!"

The name hung in the air like a desperate plea.

Akira felt too mortified to glance at either Hikaru or Sai then, and he ended up looking in Ogata's direction. Ogata's eyebrows were raised, undoubtedly because of Hikaru's shockingly intimate form of address, but he did not otherwise stir from his seated position, his lit cigarette still smoldering between his fingers. He met Akira's eyes with a carefully neutral expression, and Akira understood that Ogata was counseling him to simply wait, that this really wasn't "about" _them._ Except Akira knew it was, because it was Hikaru.

"I'm so sorry," Sai said, his own voice husky with emotion. He lowered his eyes. "I... did not wish to hurt you."

"You just disappeared... and all I had was this..." Hikaru held out his hand to show Sai his fan.

"I have a fan too," Sai said, sounding puzzled.

The statement was so incongruous that Akira couldn't help looking at Sai, despite his mortification. Sai was holding a beautiful white fan in his hands now, looking from it to repeatedly as if the fan were the Rosetta Stone and Shindou a particularly confusing text. "I thought I had given this to someone. I've been wondering why I still had it," Sai said.

At those words, Hikaru went completely still, but Sai apparently did not notice. "We were playing a game, and I think I had to leave. I didn't want to... I didn't want to leave you. So I wanted you to have this, to remember me." Sai's expression turned inwards as he opened and closed the fan slowly. "But it seems I was the one who forgot _you_. I'm so sorry. _Hikaru._ "

Akira watched as Hikaru raised his head to see Sai extending the fan towards him, handle-first. Hikaru stared at the fan and at Sai, who was smiling gently even though he had started to cry as well.

"I'm afraid this is late, but please accept it," Sai said, his beautiful eyes soft with apology.

Hikaru made a small strangled noise, and then his fan clattered to the ground as he rushed towards Sai, grabbing him around the waist with enough force that Sai stumbled backwards a step.

"It's about time you big dork," Akira heard Hikaru sob into Sai's chest. Sai ruffled his hair affectionately.

###

Hikaru and Sai clung to each other openly, completely caught up in their own private world. They didn't notice the open stares they were receiving from some other patrons who were crossing the patio to enter the restaurant.

"Looked for you everywhere," Hikaru said between sobs and hiccups. "Couldn't find you anywhere in Tokyo so I went to Innoshima but you weren't there, so I came back to Tokyo to look at Torajiro's grave but you weren't there either. I kept hoping I would find you somehow, or you would just show up and I waited and stopped playing go but you never did. I thought you were gone forever."

Sai made some comforting noises as he rubbed Hikaru's back. "It's all right. It's all right. I'm here now."

"Promise you won't leave again?" Hikaru mumbled into Sai's shirt.

"I promise."Sai said solemnly. "I don't want to miss any more of your life. It seems that you've changed a lot while I was gone."

"I have?" Hikaru said, visibly calmer now that he'd extracted the promise from Sai.

 _He seems so gentle._ Tension that Akira hadn't been aware of began to ease out of his shoulders. Perhaps his worry over Sai's reaction had been misplaced. It was obvious that Sai cared for Shindou deeply, even if he didn't quite remember the nature of their relationship.

"Yes, for one thing, you've gotten so tall," Sai said, pulling back slightly to regard Hikaru with a proud smile. "I remember when you were just this high." He made a gesture near his waistline.

"I was NOT ever that short," Hikaru said indignantly. "You're just an abnormally tall freak of nature!" Hikaru's lower lip jutted out in a pout as he disentangled himself from Sai.

"Is Hikaru sensitive about his height?" Sai questioned innocently, his eyes twinkling with laughter as he squeezed Hikaru's shoulder.

"No!"

Hikaru retrieved the fan he'd dropped, but then abruptly halted instead of walking towards the table. He shot a glare of open distrust towards Ogata, who merely arched an eyebrow nonchalantly.

"Is something wrong?" Sai said, glancing between Ogata and Hikaru.

"It seems you and Hikaru have a lot to talk about," Ogata said. "Maybe you would like to sit at a separate table so you can catch up? Akira-kun and I also have things to discuss, so it wouldn't be a problem, and the restaurant shouldn't mind because there's plenty of space."

Sai flashed Ogata a grateful smile, and turned towards Hikaru, who shrugged and followed him towards the table. Akira settled into the chair across from Ogata, angling his body slightly so he could catch some bits of Sai and Hikaru's conversation.

###

"I trust you're doing well?" Ogata said, his features as composed and unreadable as during a match, like he had decided to pretend there were absolutely nothing out of the ordinary about what's happening.

 _If that's the hand you want to play._ Akira kept his own face bland. "Yes, thank you. I haven't congratulated you on your new winning streak, Ogata-san."

" _What about your friend Akari? Is she still playing go?"_

" _Yes, she's stills having Go lession with Shikarawa-sensei! She got into a really good high school and even started a Go club there. Sometimes she comes over and play me. "_

"So, Shindou knew **Sai** after all," Ogata finally said, apparently having no interest in a trivial small talk. "It seems they know each other quite well." He took a long, leisurely drag on his cigarette, a not-so- subtle cue for Akira to start talking.

" _...working in a go salon? That's so cool, Sai!_

 _"_ _Hey, I'm gonna be promoted to 7-Dan soon! And I'm playing in the Kisei-League. And I got seeded into this year's Hokuto Cup too!"_

Akira had known Ogata long enough to have learned the art of holding a conversation in which absolutely no vital information was imparted. "Yes, it does," Akira said casually while Hikaru yelped in the background, apparently being punished for his impudence with a hair-mussing.

Ogata sighed almost imperceptibly, and leaned in closer, a sign Akira knew to interpret as partial surrender. "How long has Shindou been training with Fujiwara-san?"

Akira was not inclined to be generous, so he put on his best prim face. "Perhaps it would better for you to ask Fujiwara-san? I'm not sure if it would be proper for me to discuss what was told to me in confidence."

"Akira. Don't be ridiculous. You know that Fujiwara is an amnesiac."

Akira fixed Ogata with a steely look. "I know. I'm resolved to help him, by telling _him_ whatever useful information I may possess." _Like_ you _ought to have done from the very_ _beginning._

Ogata's cool expression faltered for a moment, Akira's barb not missing its target. "That's very generous of you. Fujiwara-san is fortunate."

" _You, uh, don't have a family. They... died a long time ago."_

"Why didn't you? Why didn't you tell him what you knew about **Sai**?"

The corners of Ogata's mouth curled up slightly. "Going straight for the jugular as usual, I see. Well, it's a little complicated."

"I'm good at listening," Akira said tersely. _Don't patronize me to try to cover up your mistakes. I'm too old to fall for that anymore._

" _-no, besides me, you didn't have friends. You sorta had this condition, so, you know, you couldn't really be around people. No no, you're fine now!"_

Ogata pushed at the bridge of his glasses. "Sometimes people... do not always act in the most logical manner. It was a miscalculation, one which I'm trying to rectify."

Akira bit back a snappy remark. Sai was probably angry with Ogata, so Ogata was trying to make amends. Yes, Ogata _would_ consider ticking **Sai** off to be a "miscalculation."

" _I didn't have a job either? What was I doing day by day?"_

"I know I was wrong," Ogata said softly.

Akira blinked in surprise. Had Ogata just...?

" _...I'm alone, and I have no responsibilities or family? I must admit... that doesn't sound very... pleasant."_

"I apologized to." Ogata said. "It was not my intention to... cause him difficulties. Or you."

" _No, it's not like that at all, Sai! Don't say things like that! It totally wasn't your fault! You're misunderstanding. Some horrible things happened to you, and, and... just promise me you won't do anything stupid, okay?!"_

Hikaru's exclamation drew Ogata and Akira's attention to the other table, where Hikaru was clutching Sai by the hand. Sai looked like he was on the verge of tears again. "I swear, it wasn't anything wrong you did. I just... I'm sorry, I just _can't_ tell you everything now because it will make you really sad, and I don't want you to be sad. Please, is it okay to wait? Just for a little while?" Hikaru begged.

"I won't," Sai said in a small voice. He patted Hikaru's hand. "I can wait, Hikaru. I'm just happy to have you with me again. I know you'll tell me the details when the time is right," he said with a sad smile.

Akira's chest tightened. _He's so trusting._ Sai was not angry that Hikaru was asking for time, even though Hikaru knew more about Sai than Sai did. He was not resentful. He simply trusted Hikaru to have his best interests at heart.

###

Keeping the smile on, Sai turned towards Akira. "I'm so sorry! I've been terribly inconsiderate, having not properly introduce myself to you, Touya-sensei."

Akira waved his hands as Sai bowed apologetically. "Please, don't worry about it. And…please call me Akira. I am very glad to get to know you, Fujiwara-san. I am thankful for you to having bought Hikaru into the Go world. ". _..and into my world_. Akira thought. Akira actually preferred to be called by his family name - most people hadn't earned enough familiarity to call him "Akira" - but _this is Sai_ , so it's a different story, of course.

Sai beamed. "Well, to be honest, I think you had far more to do with Hikaru's interest in Go than I ever did. He was so excited to see you sitting there in the Go salon! Before that, he was always complaining that I'd dragged him into 'an old man's game.' He preferred playing soccer and dodgeball." Sai's fingers brushed absently against the fan on the table as he spoke, and Akira noticed the distinctive tassel on the end. The fan was Hikaru's. That meant Hikaru had Sai's fan now. The fans had returned to the places they're suposed to be. "I am also thankful for you to be Hikaru's rival. And friend."

Akira's heart beamed with happiness to hear that last sentence. He wanted Sai to like him, and from what Sai had just said, it seemmed _Sai did like him_. "You also have a rival," Akira stated. "My father has long been looking forward to a rematch with you." Akira could not bring himself to say: _It is his greatest desire_.

Sai's face lit up like the sun. "So it _is_ true," he said. "A friend had told me that earlier, but I was worried that perhaps I had misunderstood him, or that perhaps your father had already found another rival since he's been travelling so much and playing the very best all over the world. I should like very much to play him again! I don't know if Ogata-sensei told you, but I've been recording all the games I can remember. I have quite a lot so far, but the game I played with your father is... very special to me."

Sai seemed to suddenly remember something. "I recall what a hyperactive child Hikaru was when I first met him. I suppose that's why he never learned go before, even though his grandfather is quite a dedicated player. He was very happy when Hikaru started playing seriously and enjoyed their games a great deal." Sai smiled, apparently delighted at the recollection. "Have you met Shindou-san?"

"No, it's a pity I never had the pleasure. Hikaru's Grandpa passed away about two months ago."

Something suddenly stroke through Sai's heart like a lightning, so hard he found it hard to breath. Akira looked up to Sai to see an utterly puzzled face.

"Please take my to Shindou-san's house. Please, right now! I don't know why but I'm feeling like I need to go there."

###

Ogata had no idea why they had to leave at the middle of the meal, heading to the residence of Hikaru's Grandfather's house. Despite Hikaru's desperate insistence on doing that on another day, Sai seemed to ask for it with a determination no one could turn off. Ogata offered to give them a drive. Sai stayed silent and thoughtful during the whole drive, while Akira held Hikaru's trembling hands in his palms, hoping this could calm down his extremely anxious looking rival, even when his own stomach was twisting in anxiety. _Hikaru's grandpa, the attic, the cursed Shuusaku goban, the very one that Sai had possessed – had lived in for centuries_. What if Sai remembered his connection to the cursed goban _right now_? _How should they react? They had been obviously unprepared for the upcoming event._

After they had arrived, Sai bowed to thank Ogata for the drive, but asked to go in without him. Ogata was not particularly pleasant to be left out of the event, but saw no further need to argue with Sai given his current state.

"Alright then, I'll go to the Institute to have some work done and be back at my apartment then. Take care, Fujiwara!"

Sai nodded attentively, but his eyes were still so empty, his face paralyzed. Hikaru's heart hurt so badly at the scene. Sai turned to him. "Hikaru, I have the feeling that there is a place here I have to look at. I don't know why I have this felling or where the place is, but...I feel like you do. Will you...help me...please?"

Hikaru' heart filled with fear of how Sai would react if he'd take Sai to _that place_. But _there was no point postponing this - Sai begged for it_. _Sai had the right to know about his own existence._

"Yes, Sai, I do know."


	67. Chapter 67

**Chapter 67**

In the corner of the dim lit attic stood a goban. An very old goban, a fine layer of dust covered all over its surface. Hikaru insisted on leaving the goban exactly where it had been after his grandpa's death. His heart clenched at the scene, it felt like living through a deja vu.

A tremor ran through Sai's body as soon as he saw the goban. " I now know why I _couldn't be around people. Why I neither had a job nor a I couldn't even place stones or face any of my opponents. Why my only existence was on NetGo. And why Hikaru went to a graveyard to search for me." Sai_ said, his voice barely above a whisper, his face filled with utter pain. "I remember now. You found this board, and I took over your mind." Tears started streaming on his cheeks. "I was a _ghost."_

Hikaru's eyes were filled with tears, too. Akira's heart broke into pieces watching his beloved one cry, thinking about how much pain he had to endure in the last short period of several months.

"I was the selfish one who... drowned himself. Because of my selfish desires, I couldn't accept the serenity of the afterlife. I was so cruel, taking Torajirou's games, and trying to take yours too. I'm a horrible, selfish teacher. Hikaru, I'm so sorry." Sai continued to cry.

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't let you play enough, and you disappeared and it was all my fault!" Hikaru choked out a sob, and hid his face behind his hands. "I'm so sorry, Sai. Please don't hate me."

"Hikaru. I could never hate you." Sai patted Hikaru's back soothingly, but Akira could see that his hands were trembling. "What happened wasn't your fault. I should be the one to say sorry, for taking over your life, forcing you to play."

Hikaru shook his head. "You're the best thing that ever happened to me. Before, I didn't have a purpose or a goal. I didn't like school, and I wasn't serious about anything. You came and became my best friend, you bought Go and Akira into my life. I would have given anything to get you back."

"Hikaru is too kind," Sai said, hugging Hikaru tightly and stroking on Hikaru's hair. He did not say anything else.

Akira wasn't sure how much time passed with the two of them huddled together, crying softly. He just watched, slightly surprised at himself for not feeling terribly awkward. Usually he felt like an unwelcome intruder whenever a situation became serious or intimate. But he felt like he was a part of this – because this was an important part of Hikaru's life and Hikaru's an important part of his life, too.

"Sai, are you okay?" Hikaru had disentangled himself from Sai's embrace, and now he was shaking Sai's shoulder. "Talk to me, Sai!"

Akira realized that Sai was shivering, as if he were horribly cold. He walked across the room, and joined Hikaru by Sai's side. Akira put a hand on Sai's forehand, and found that his skin was clammy.

"Hikaru, look at his eyes," Akira said. Sai's pupils were blown and unfocused. He'd seen the expression before, on a dazed pedestrian who'd been struck by a motorbike. The injuries hadn't been serious, but the pedestrian had been so startled that he had gone into shock, and had needed treatment.

"What's happened?" Hikaru demanded, his voice's shaking with fear.

"He's in shock. What he just remembered would be too much for anyone to handle," Akira said.

"Let me call an ambulance!" Hikaru said, patting his pockets frantically. "Damn, I left my cell in my backpack! I'm running downstair to use the telephone!"

"I'm okay," Sai mumbled, his eyelids fluttering as he tried to focus. "Please don't make me go to the hospital." He clutched at Hikaru's hand. "I don't want to be alone. I don't want to disappear again. You can still feel me, right? You can still hear me?"

"Yeah, Sai," Hikaru said, patting Sai's hand. "You're _real._ You're not going anywhere, I swear. I won't let it happen." Hikaru's face scrunched up in resolve and pain, and he laced his fingers through Sai's.

Akira felt his heart wrench. He had known it was going to be difficult when Sai remembered, but he hadn't anticipated _this_. "We won't leave you alone, Fujiwara-san. You're going to be alright," Akira said with false calmness, and took Sai's other hand. Sai's pulse was racing frantically, like he'd been running sprints.

"Thank you," Sai said. He leaned into Hikaru's shoulder again, and shut his eyes.

After a few minutes, Sai's breath evened out, his pulse slowing to a steady beat. Akira heaved a silent sigh of relief, and met Hikaru's eyes across Sai's back. _We should take him out of here_ , Akira mouthed. Being away from the attic and that goban – Sai's former prison, really – might prevent another panic attack.

Hikaru nodded. "Sai, are you ready to go?" he asked, his tone softer than Akira had ever heard it.

"Yes," Sai said uncertainly, as if he'd been presented with a riddle. "I want to go home."

Hikaru licked his lips nervously. "Do you mean my house?"

"No, my home. Heian-kyou."

Hikaru swallowed hard, and Akira knew he was forcing back tears. "Sai, you can't go back there. It's Kyoto now. It's not the same anymore. It's been more than a thousand years."

With disjointed, halting moments nothing like his usual grace, Sai pulled away from Hikaru, staring at him with an expression of disbelief. Finally, the disbelief faded, replaced by a weary resignation. Sai bowed his head. "I... understand. Then please, would you take me to Ogata-sensei's apartment?"

Hurt flashed across Hiakru's face. "Sai, why won't you come back to my house? You lived there with me for over two years. Come stay with me again. We can stay up late playing games just like before! It will be just like the old days again."

"Hikaru is always so kind to me. But please take me to Ogata's for now." Sai seemed to be exhausted, so Hikaru had no mean to argue with him or act against his will for now. Instead, he just nodded, and helped Fujiwara to his unsteady feet.

Akira felt a pang of sympathy for Hikaru, and wondered if Hikaru understood Sai's reasons. Even though Sai had apparently regained his memories, and his memories of living with Hikaru for over two years, he was afraid to return with Hikaru.

While Ogata's place had been Sai's happy home for the last couple of months, Hikaru's house was where he had disappeared.

###

 ** _Credits to_** _: Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_

 _It took me quite some time to work on this chapter, to put it into the order I wished for, but it was also so much fun. For more than ten years since the day I finished the manga, I've always wished that Sai would come back, regardless how illogical it can be, cause it broke my heart to read about his disappearance and his unfulfilled wishes. And now, here he is, back to life with a body of his own, surrounding by people who love him and care for him. The event of him realising he was a ghost was heart-clenching, but inevitable. My heart's full with joy editing this chapter. Thank you, Ontogenesis, for this beautiful story!_


	68. Chapter 68

**Chapter 68**

 _"_ _Fujiwara-san is not feeling well, so Hikaru and I brought him back to your apartment. I apologize for the intrusion."_

As Ogata reached his apartment, he saw Fujiwara was covered in a heavy blanket, even though it was still relatively warm outside. Hikaru sat silently by his side with an utterly anxious face. Both of them didn't stir when Ogata approached.

Ogata's frown deepened. There was something pinched about Sai's face, as if he were unable to relax even in sleep. Like he was in pain. Ogata touched the back of his palm to Sai's forehead. His skin wasn't hot, despite the blanket, so he wasn't running a fever at least.

There was nothing else Ogata could check without disturbing Sai. He'd have to wait until the other man woke up.

Akira was waiting at the kitchen table, his hands folded in his lap. "He's been sleeping mostly ever since we brought him back. Sometimes he wakes up with a start, but he doesn't stay awake for long."

Ogata sat down heavily, letting a long breath out. "Akira, what exactly happened at Shindou's grandparents' place?"

"He remembers now," Akira said quietly.

Ogata froze, trying to process what he had just heard. "What... what exactly does he remember?" Ogata managed to ask.

Akira's gaze slid over to the living room. "Everything, it seems. Everything that Hikaru already knew, as well as things that Hikaru had no knowledge of."

Sai was _cured_? His amnesia was gone? No wonder Sai had suffered a meltdown. Remembering so much at once would be enough to overwhelm just about anyone. "So he remembers where he comes from? His past life?" Ogata asked as evenly as he could manage with his blood pounding in his ears.

Akira nodded. "Yes. But it's..." Akira paused, searching for words. "...complicated."

"'Complicated'?" Ogata arched an eyebrow. Obviously, Akira didn't want to breach whatever confidence Shindou was holding him to, something Ogata didn't actually hold against Akira. Akira was incapable of being rational whenever Shindou was involved. "That's rather vague."

Akira bit at his lip, then said. "I told you that Fujiwara-san wakes up sometimes," Akira continued. "He's... checking to make sure that we're still here. He's afraid. Afraid of being left alone."

Ogata nodded, recalling Sai's nightmare a few weeks ago. He'd been afraid of being left alone then, too, something Ogata had attributed to his amnesia. "That's not surprising. He must feel vulnerable."

"There's more, of course, but I don't think it's my place to tell you," Akira said, a hint of apology in his tone.

"Don't worry about it. That's enough information for now. I'll discuss the rest with Fujiwara later, and see where he wants to go from here. Why don't you two go home and get some rest? You look tired," Ogata suggested, noticing Akira's sagging shoulders and drawn face. He was probably drained after dealing with such an emotional situation. "Go home. Take Shindou with you, before he collapses. I'll take proper care of Fujiwara."

Akira nodded in agreement, and got up from his chair and dragged Hikaru with him. Hikaru tried to argue at first, but Akira convinced him with the smoothes voice he had and succeeded at last.

Ogata followed the two to the entranceway. Akira put on his shoes, and then gave Ogata a measured look. "Ogata-san, Fujiwara-san's past is... unusual."

" _Fujiwara_ is unusual. It's probably a prerequisite to becoming a Go player," Ogata said dryly.

Akira shook his head. "It's more than that. His story isn't easy to believe. Please try to keep an open mind."

Ogata frowned, wondering exactly what Akira thought he'd have a hard time believing about a man he'd found floating in a canal in the middle of the night. There was nothing normal about Fujiwara. Of course he'd have a strange past. "Alright, Akira-kun. I understand. And thank you, for taking care of Fujiwara-san."

"I'm glad I could do something," Akira said, but his troubled eyes didn't match the smile on his lips.

Ogata closed the door, pondering Akira's expression. He was probably still worried about Fujiwara. Akira had always possessed a tender side.

###

Ogata was puzzling over a kifu when a gasp broke his concentration.

Sai was awake.

"Ogata-sensei?" Sai whispered. "Are you there?" With sluggish movements, as if he were underwater, he pushed the blanket off, and struggled to right himself.

"I'm here," Ogata said quickly, getting out of his chair. He sat down beside Sai on the couch. The other man was shivering, Ogata realized with alarm.

Sai squinted at him as if he were having trouble focusing. "Ogata-sensei?"

Ogata took Fujiwara's hand and squeezed it briefly. "I'm right here."

Sai blinked slowly, craning his neck as he looked side to side. "Where are Akira and Hikaru? How long have you been here?"

Ogata draped the blanket around Sai's shoulders. "About an hour or so. Akira and Shindou both look very exhausted, so I told them I'd take care of you, so the two could leave and get some rest."

Sai fingered the tassels on the blanket idly.

"I'm sorry I'm always causing problems for you."

"You aren't troublesome. You've held up remarkably well, considering what you've been through," Ogata said. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Ogata-sensei, you gave me shelter and cared for me. You deserve to know," Sai said after a long moment of silence had passed."I want you to believe me. I... _need_ you to believe me." He sounded almost desperate.

"Why would you think that I wouldn't?"

Sai swallowed, and closed his eyes. "Ogata-sensei... you're very logical. Rational. You believe in the facts, in things you can touch and analyze and figure out. This is not like that."

Ogata frowned. He'd heard of people who claimed they were the reincarnation of Jesus Christ or Napoleon or the great Alexander, but Ogata had always chalked it up to attention-seeking behavior by people bored with their mundane lives. But Sai didn't fit that profile at all. "Please," Ogata said, "give me the benefit of the doubt. I trust you."

"Thank you," Sai said, giving Ogata a shaky smile. He exhaled slowly. "I... used to teach go to the Emperor. I was one of two tutors to his Majesty. But my rival – the other go tutor – was jealous of me. He framed me by pretending that I had... _cheated_ at a game, and I was cast out of the court." Fujiwara broke eye contact with Ogata. "I couldn't bear the shame. So I drowned myself."

A cold chill ran over Ogata's body. No one had tried to murder Sai. Sai had tried and failed to kill himself, and Ogata had found him floating in the canal.

"But I still wanted to find the Hand of God, so my spirit was unable to ascend to heaven. My soul was trapped inside my goban – the same one that later passed into the hands of Torajirou and eventually into the hands of Hikaru's grandfather." Sai paused, and took a deep breath. "I spent... hundreds of years in that goban, just waiting for someone – anyone – who could hear my voice, so I could have another chance to play go again. All that time, and there were only two."

Ogata's mind went numb. Sai actually believed he'd committed suicide _successfully_ \- and that he'd been _dead_ for _hundreds_ of years. Sai hadn't been referring to the current Emperor at all.

"This is why I became so upset earlier. Hikaru showed me the goban in his grandfather's storage shed, and I remembered that it had been the prison for my soul," Sai said quietly. Sai continued his story about how Torajirou had allowed him – or rather, Sai's _spirit_ \- to play all of Torajirou's games under the name Honinbou Shuusaku.

Ogata kept his face very still, but inwardly, his horror was increasing as he realized that Sai believed _every single_ word that he was saying about his existence as a spirit. There was no hint of a joke in Sai's tone, no twitch to betray a lie, just the same sincerity that Sai always exhibited. This was all quite real to Sai.

Then Sai began to explain the circumstances under which he'd met and possessed Shindou Hikaru, persuaded him to take up go as a hobby, and sent the entire go community into a state of upheaval.

Despite Ogata's disbelief, he couldn't help noting how well the pieces of the story fit together, like patterns on a goban. Sai's explanation meshed with the bits of the story Ogata already knew, like how Shindou's abilities fluctuated from brilliant to bad then better, and how extremely reluctant Shindou had been to divulge any information about **s a i** , and why Shindou possessed such an incongruous fixation with Honinbou Shuusaku (Ogata couln't help recalling Shindous dog fight against Ko Yongha ). The story worked startlingly well, even the part about Sai's alleged past in the Heian court, which explained Sai's hobbies and mannerisms.

"It was shortly after that game with Touya-sensei that I disappeared. I still don't know exactly why I disappeared. Neither does Hikaru. He told me that he quit playing go for several months because he thought it would bring me back." Sai's gaze turned inwards. "I think what scares me the most is that I don't know why I was allowed to come back with a body. Maybe I'll just disappear again," he admitted in a tight voice.

Sai did not speak again, and Ogata realized he was finished with his story. It was a story that explained Sai's past perfectly, except for the minor fact that it was _completely insane_. Ogata was at an utter loss for words. What exactly what he supposed to say? Sai clearly believed that he had told Ogata the truth, and he wanted Ogata's support. Actually, Ogata wished he _could_ lie to Sai; he wished he could pretend that he believed Sai's story.

But Ogata had sworn to himself that he'd never lie to Sai again, not after that initial lie of omission had almost destroyed their relationship. Nor could Ogata support Sai in believing complete nonsense. That would only hurt Sai's recovery in the long run. What Ogata needed to do was calm Sai down first, and then help him think rationally about his situation. From there, Sai could make informed decisions about his future.

"You aren't going anywhere," Ogata said reassuringly, steepling his hands. "People just don't disappear. Spirits, maybe – I won't claim any knowledge of the occult or even its existence - but obviously you're a real, tangible person." Ogata took a deep breath, regarding Sai carefully. "I think maybe you ought to consider visiting a psychiatrist. I'm sure Dr. Kiyohara could recommend a good one, someone who is easy to talk to. You can discuss your fears about disappearing and your amnesia with the psychiatrist, and he or she can help you work through your issues."

"You think I'm crazy. You don't believe me," Sai said, his eyes growing moist. He drew back in his chair, his water nearly sloshing out of his glass.

Ogata felt his stomach knotting at the sight of Sai withdrawing from him like Ogata was repulsive. It would be so much easier to lie, and let Sai lean against him again. "I believe that _you_ believe your story is real. I don't think you're lying; I think you're confused, and I think you're still in recovery. There's nothing wrong with going to a doctor to work out your problems. I probably should have suggested this sooner, in truth, to help you deal with the stress and bad dreams."

"Hikaru said I shouldn't tell other people because they would put me on drugs or lock me up, and I wouldn't be able to play go anymore. I don't want to," Sai said, setting his jaw stubbornly.

A flash of anger made Ogata's vision go white for an instant. So _Shindou_ had warned Sai to be afraid of the very same people who could help him. He'd abused Sai's unwavering trust in him by engineering this crazy, elaborate story that gave Fujiwara the answers he needed, but for what purpose? Sai was confused and sick, but Shindou had no such excuse.

Suddenly, Ogata had an epiphany: if Sai believed he had a special, secret connection with Shindou that no one else could know about, then he'd be tied to Shindou. Shindou had convinced Sai that there was no one else in his life, that Sai was truly alone, and that only Shindou understood him, that Sai had been _his_ ghost, his constant companion for two and a half years. That was a powerfully binding story - and horribly dishonest. Shindou had obviously known Sai before his failed suicide, and he'd used Sai's amnesia to manipulate the man for his own selfish reasons. He'd even gotten Akira to go along with the charade, probably by using Akira's infatuation with him.

Ogata was disgusted. "Don't you think it's a little unwise for Shindou to be advising you not to seek professional help? He's still a child, and ignorant about much of the world," Ogata said, biting back the words he really wanted to say.

"I trust Hikaru. And Hikaru trusts me," Sai said pointedly.

Ogata's patience snapped. "Shindou is _lying_ to you! He can't stand the thought you of regaining your independence from him, so he's using his position to encourage you to believe a ridiculous story – one that, might I add, conveniently makes you _very_ dependent on him. And of course he told you not to talk to anyone else; they'd realize how wild the story is, and they'd try to talk you out of it."

Sai's lips trembled. "You're jealous. You're jealous of our relationship," he said, his tone half-disbelieving.

Ogata rubbed at his temples. He was developing a major headache. "I'm not jealous; I'm _worried_. You can't keep believing these lies. It's unhealthy."

"I remembered most of these 'lies' on my own. And I remember things that Hikaru never knew, like the color of his Majesty's eyes, and the first song I learnt on my flute, and the smell of Heian-kyou after a hard rain. Hikaru didn't lie, and you're hardly in a place to be accusing anyone of dishonesty, Ogata-sensei," Sai whispered, tears slipping out of his eyes. "I'm sorry that I asked you to believe such a difficult story, but you're important to me, so I thought you should know what I am – what I was. I guess I was just being selfish again, because I knew that you don't believe in such things."

"Please don't cry," Ogata murmured. His head still hurt, and now he felt sick to his stomach, watching Sai cry. He didn't know what he was supposed to say. Maybe there was nothing to say.

Sai rubbed at his eyes. "I'm sorry. Please excuse me." he said, abruptly standing up. "Thank you for everything you've done for me, Ogata-sensei. But I think it's time for me to leave." He stared at Ogata hesitatingly for a moment. "Goodbye."

Ogata watched him go.

###

 ** _Credits to_** _: Ontogenesis (Desynchronization)_


	69. Chapter 69

**Chapter 69**

From: touya akira

To: touya kouyo

Re: Good Afternoon

 _Dear Father,_

 _I hope you and Mother have been doing well. Here in Tokyo I am doing very well with my matches. I have passed the Toyota Cup prelims._

 _I am writing to inform you about a man named Fujiwara-san. This is the same_ _ **s a i**_ _that both of us played online two years ago, I have got Shindou's confirmation about this._

 _Fujiwara-san's situation is quite complicated, of which I could not inform you per email. I offer Fujiwara-san to stay at our residence and hope you and mother will give me your permission. Fujiwara-san is very much eager to play you again, and has asked me to introduce him to you upon your return. Please let me know when you could come back to Tokyo._

 _Please take care of yourself, and give Mother my regards._

 _-Akira  
_

 _###_

From: touya kouyo  
To: touya akira  
Sent: Tue, 02 Sep 2003 7:38 p.m.  
Re: Re: Good Afternoon

 _Congratulation, Akira! Your mother is very proud to hear this news. Both your mother and I are doing well. Your mother insists that I remind you to take a coat with you when you go out in the evenings._

 _Please treat Fujiwara-sensei with the best hospitality on my behalf. Our plane will arrive at Narita Wednesday the 29th in the afternoon. I am looking forward to a match with Fujiwara-san whenever Fujiwara-san could set up his time._

 _I must confess to finding myself rather impatient for my team matches to finish._

 _Touya Kouyou_


End file.
